need a wee bit of advice...... [Archive]

View Full Version : need a wee bit of advice......

Gmann

05-01-2002, 03:43 PM

Here's the jist of my problem here :Just got out of a 3 yr relationship. Been rediscovering what its like to go out and have fun again...hang out with my friends...and enjoy not aswering to anyone. Met someone 3 days after the break up. Known this girl for quite awhile now. Get along with this woman very well....we pretty much think the same shit...its scary! When I first became single I thought "yay...I just want to be with myself now...be sigle for awhile" Now...the more and more I hang out with this girl the more I find myself in the back of my head wanting to be just with her. Now is this cause Im not used to being alone....or is there some other mental hangup going on in the pit of my head.

Am I being a fag for thinking like this or what?

In a world of lies it is the man who tells the truth who must be silenced!

Alice S. Fuzzybutt

05-01-2002, 04:21 PM

No, you're not a fag for feeling this way. But, 3 years is a long time to be with someone. This girl sounds very cool, but just make she's not "Rebound Gal" (been there, done that!).

No reason why you have to jump into a new relationship right away. Go out and have fun, but hang with her a little more before you make any major decisions about asking her out.

<IMG SRC="http://mywebpages.comcast.net/vitamin.d/referencepix/fuzzybuttsig.jpg">

And I wonder
When I sing along with you
If everything could ever feel this real forever
If anything could ever be this good again

Gmann

05-02-2002, 06:34 AM

ya see....thats the thing also now....whenever I go out I want her to come with me too. This is strange cause I dont think I was like this at anytime with the EX. I think the only things we differ on are the mets/yankees, her cat and the fact I smoke once in awhile. Other than that I cant think of anything else thats different between the 2 of us....scary!

In a world of lies it is the man who tells the truth who must be silenced!

fatty

05-02-2002, 06:40 AM

it sounds cool man but just relax. there's no need to rush anything. and honestly if you spent that long with someone, you don't need to have her go out with you every time. i mean once on a weekend is cool but try to relax.

no matter how great she seems you are not in the best state of mind so you aren't thinking clearly. it sounds really good and it probably is, so there's no need to make something happen now.

<IMG SRC=http://www.whyy.org/edison/tech/andre/big1.gif>
I love it when they call me big poppa.
I only smoke blunts if they roll proppa.

A.J.

05-02-2002, 06:50 AM

No reason why you have to jump into a new relationship right away. Go out and have fun, but hang with her a little more before you make any major decisions about asking her out.

Exactly -- sounds like you're just good friends right now. Enjoy that and see what happens.

AngelAmy

05-02-2002, 07:28 AM

hm i guess i can relate in a tiny way.

i just broke up with my last b/f because i just needed time to myself. i just wanted to be on my own for a while. i guess i havent quite gotten over all the hurt that danilo caused me. but now i really like this guy. i find myself wanting to spend every waking hour of every day with him. it really sucks because of the dstance and the fact that we both have such busy schedules (him more than me)

i dont know if he feels the same way i do but i know there is something there

i dont know if i want a relationship with him or not but all i know is i want to be with him

<marquee>"You Can Speak Your Mind, But Not On My Time" - Billy Joel "My Life"</marquee>
http://wnewsgirl.homestead.com/files/AngelAmy.jpg
MEMBER OF THE NOSE ORGASM ARMY
PRESIDENT OF THE IRISH DIET SODA BREAD FAN CLUB
PRESIDENT OF THE C-BLOCKER HATERS CLUB
HEAD OF THE FEZ HAT CULT

This message was edited by AngelAmy on 5-2-02 @ 11:32 AM

scorpion

05-02-2002, 08:01 AM

No reason why you have to jump into a new relationship right away. Go out and have fun, but hang with her a little more before you make any major decisions about asking her out.

Well put Alice. take your time and have some fun. If its going to happen it will. Don't fall into it because you need to have someone. Get use to taking care of your self alone first. Its been a while.

<img src= "http://www.healthytraining.com/rf/rfsig.jpg">
Now I'm starvin

Poison Ivy

05-02-2002, 10:26 AM

Get along with this woman very well....we pretty much think the same shit...its scary!

It is scary...for her :p

<img src=http://groups.yahoo.com/group/OAComSigPics/files/ItchyBitch/pirfsig.jpg> <marquee>"Just before our love got lost you said "I am as constant as the Northern Star" and I said, Constantly in the darkness?Where's that at? If you want me I'l<fo

Alice S. Fuzzybutt

05-02-2002, 12:35 PM

Well put Alice.

Thanks Scorpion. I'm a board "elder" so I always try to give some sage advice.

Gmann, relax! Just have fun. Sure, have her come out with you and your buds from time to time. But also go out without her from time to time. You need to recoup from your last relationship.

Crushes are fun, aren't they? This is the MOST PERFECT time between a man and a woman. Savor it!

~The Fuzzybutt

<IMG SRC="http://mywebpages.comcast.net/vitamin.d/referencepix/fuzzybuttsig.jpg">

And I wonder
When I sing along with you
If everything could ever feel this real forever
If anything could ever be this good again

Aggie

05-02-2002, 02:07 PM

From someone who's had a long relationship and was all of a sudden single, ENJOY IT NOW! Just try to control the amount of time you talk her and spend with her at first!

<IMG SRC="http://rfnetearth2ron.50megs.com/images/rfnetaggie2.jpg">

Gmann

05-02-2002, 02:37 PM

It is scary...for her :p

ya see....Im trying my hardest to talk about a serious subject here..and people have to make wisecracks......IM puttin my self out there...lol

smartass! :p

In a world of lies it is the man who tells the truth who must be silenced!

Poison Ivy

05-02-2002, 04:03 PM

smartass!

You know you love me

you're lucky I didn't point this out:
Met someone 3 days after the break up. Known this girl for quite awhile now.

So wait...did you just meet her or have you known her awhile? ;)

<img src=http://groups.yahoo.com/group/OAComSigPics/files/ItchyBitch/pirfsig.jpg> <marquee>"Just before our love got lost you said "I am as constant as the Northern Star" and I said, Constantly in the darkness?Where's that at? If you want m</font

AngelAmy

05-03-2002, 04:31 AM

Crushes are fun, aren't they?

theres a reason they call it a crush though...someones heart is usually getting crushed

<marquee>"You Can Speak Your Mind, But Not On My Time" - Billy Joel "My Life"</marquee>
http://wnewsgirl.homestead.com/files/AngelAmy.jpg
MEMBER OF THE NOSE ORGASM ARMY
PRESIDENT OF THE IRISH DIET SODA BREAD FAN CLUB
PRESIDENT OF THE C-BLOCKER HATERS CLUB
HEAD OF THE FEZ HAT CULT

Gmann

05-03-2002, 08:20 PM

So wait...did you just meet her or have you known her awhile?

I have known this girl for awhile and have found this girl attractive since I met her. The more I have hung out and talked with her the more I found myself attracted to her. I guess Im just dumb :p

In a world of lies it is the man who tells the truth who must be silenced!

This message was edited by Gmann on 5-4-02 @ 12:26 AM

HordeKing1

05-04-2002, 05:45 PM

GMANN - Having just terminated a 3 year relationship you're accustomed to a monogomous relationship w/a high degree of intimacy with one person as opposed to spreading the intimacy around among several people.

Although you're thinking in terms of independance and being single and free; On some level you miss the security and comfort and even peace of a steady relationship.

You may feel adrift to an extent b/c of the lack of the steady girlfriend. The person you have a crush on, may appear especially attractive b/c of high levels of similar interests and tastes, but no doubt, the desire for stability makes her even more attractive.

And as the regulars know, dating all the way back to the dot com days, you can ask any question in here and receive a serious answer.

I am curious why you asked "am I being a fag for thinking like this...?" Why would anyone think that? Why would anyone care? It's not relevant and my reply would be identical if you were male, female, merm, ferm, herm hetero, homo or bisexual. They're just labels and we leave the prejudice we once may have had for those different from us at the door.

<img src="http://members.aol.com/rnfpantera/hking1">

Gmann

05-09-2002, 03:18 PM

ummmm......uh.....huh ?

can you put this into laymen terms please?

I aint that smart...can't you tell ?

In a world of lies it is the man who tells the truth who must be silenced!

HordeKing1

05-10-2002, 08:07 AM

GMANN - You miss the security of your former relationship. You want to duplicate this feeling with another woman.

<img src="http://members.aol.com/rnfpantera/hking1">

Gmann

05-10-2002, 02:16 PM

OHHHHHHHH!

ok....if you say so....thanx for the words of wisdom!

In a world of lies it is the man who tells the truth who must be silenced!