Ending relationships for the good of the other person?

[sunndoggy8]

Have you ever ended a relationship based on your thoughts that your significant other would be better off without you or with someone else?

Now I mean this in the noble way, not the BS telling your b/f or g/f that just to get out of the relationship.

Have you ever honestly felt like ending the relationship, while being bad for you, would be best for the other person even though you were breaking up wiht them?

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[Hawiian shirt craig]

the only reason i haven't is b/c i havent been
presented with this opertunity. i dont stay with
someone unless i think its long term, and i dont
start a relationship unless i know i am at a good
time in my life for one. but i could see myself ending
it if i was in need of being a selfish prick, or was
going to die or something....

-Hawiian Shirt Craig
THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS!!

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[A.J.]

Yep. I wasn't into it as much as she was. I didn't think it was fair to "go through the motions" so to speak.

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[erole]

I have not ended a relationship based on the good of the other. But, I have stopped initiating a relationship based on the good of another.
I know this girl. Would love nothing more than to take a chance...just a chance. But I know, it would be better for her if I didn't initiate anything or take that chance. For her sake, for the interests of her mind and life, I stop short, and keep things to myself. The curse of being me I suppose.
So with this experience in mind, I believe that this idea has credence. It is possible to end a relationship based on the good of the other person. Therefore, I believe that someone could honestly make that sacrifice, even at the expense of never enjoying that persons presence and comfort ever again.

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[sexy bastard]

My last relationship I did, I work the graveyard shift and she worked the day shift, I like the concept of when i go home I could hold my gf while i sleep and i want to be there for her when she goes to sleep, I thought it was the right thing cause i thought she deserved somone who could be there, so I broke up with her...unfortunately she just started dating a guy about 3 months ago, and she got pregant by him 2 months ago...so she is all excited and everything in which i am happy for her but i feel bad for her cause she jumped into that relationship extremely fast. Hell I thought I did the right thing

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[Poopsyc]

My ex-boyfriend broke up with me for my benefit. He told me he didn't love me and he would never marry me and he didn't want to waste any more of my time. He didn't think it was fair to me. I respect his honesty which is probably why we can still be friends. I think this is the first time someone has been honest with me but it still hurts.

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[Coco]

I would like to tell you a true story about what happened to a friend of mine and why I believe it is best to end relationships for the good of the other person.

A friend of mine, Roseanne, was married for a very short while out of highschool (the marriage lasted only about 2 years).

She never really dated anyone for a while until she turned about 28 when a friend of hers fixed her up with a much older man (he was around 50 at the time). She didn't like him at first, but fell for him very deeply. He was a guy who had NO intentions of remarrying anyone. He was once divorced and had I think 2 kids from that marriage.

Anyway, this relationship went on for BELIEVE IT OR NOT 15 YEARS. She was too much in love with him to leave him. But again, he had no intentions of marrying her.

She gave up all of her childbearing years to this guy. She is now in her 40's. She is no longer seeing him, but feels very bitter about the whole thing.

I guess, what I am saying is that relationships can go on and on for many years. I truly think it is right, if one party wants a marriage or a child or something more serious than the other is willing to give, the relationship should end.

______________________

We can't change our past, but we can change the way we look at it - into something more positive

[FMJeff]

It may sound selfish, but I break up with people for my own reasons, not there's. It's a little manipulative to say "I'm doing this for you..." when if the person really wanted to, they'd probably do it themselves. This doesn't apply all the time though...sometimes people are too scared or weak/submissive to break up with someone, even though they want to. A good conversation discussing what the person is getting out of it usually leads to a worthwhile resolution. Don't assume you're doing the right thing though...I would think, being a human being, that most of the time people who break up for the sake of the other person are really breaking up for thier own reasons and don't really wanna own up to that...

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[Hawiian shirt craig]

i might break up with a girl for not giving up the
baloon knot... is that selfish? or is it for her
benifit???

-Hawiian Shirt Craig
THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS!!

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[ZealandGirl]

I never broke up with someone for their benefit either. But, my last boyfriend did tell me that he had no intention of ever marrying me. He also told me that he didn't love me as much as I loved him and said I deserved better. I can't believe that this happened to someone else...I thought I was the only one that these things happen to.






One thing I don't understand is why your Buddha is that color...it should be green....like kryptonite green.

[Noellevious]

Yes...but God forbid my exes actually stay away. :)

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[phixion]

yea ive done it
one thing i promised myself is that i would never cheat on a girl cuz i was cheated on b4. and i was going out with a girl but i started getting too close with another. so i broke up with my girlfriend the next day i saw her. ive been questioning that decision lately though.

"smoking weed, smoking weed
doing coke, drinking beers
drinking beers, beers, beers
rolling fatties, smoking blunts
who smokes the blunts?
we smoke the blunts."-
Jay