Halloween Joke Thread....

[Earth2RON]

A black man and his wife were going to a Halloween party in a
couple of days so the husband tells his wife to go to the
store and get costumes for them to wear.

When he comes home that night he goes into the bedroom and there laid out on the bed is a Superman costume.The husband yells at his wife, "What are you doing? Have you ever heard of a
black Superman? Take this back and get me something else I can wear."

The next day the wife, not too happy, returns the costume and
gets a replacement.

The husband comes home from work, goes to the bedroom, and there,
laid out on the bed, is a Batman costume. He again yells at his wife,
"What are you doing? Have you ever heard of a black Batman?
Take this back and get me something I can wear to the costume
party!"

The next morning his irate wife goes shopping. When the husband
comes home again from work, there laid out on the bed are
three items: one is a set of three white buttons, the second
is a thick white belt, and the third item is a 2 x 4.

The husband yells at the wife, "What the hell are these for?" The
wife yells
back, "Take your clothes off. You can put the three white buttons on
the
front of you and go as a domino. If you don't like that one, you can
put the
white belt on and go as an Oreo. And if you don't like THAT one,
you can stick the 2 x 4 up your ass and go as a fudgesicle."






This message was edited by Earth2RON on 10-3-02 @ 4:35 AM

[Gwen]

Okay, my joke isn't as funny as E2R's, but here goes:

Q) Why can't witches get pregnant??

A) Because Warlocks have Halloweenies (rimshot)

Thank you thank you, I'll be here all week...make sure you tip your waitress!

<img src=http://robie.nine-zero.com:443/files/dynamitediva/waynesig.jpg>

[ADF]

...we've been outside eating corn cobs all day!

<img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/adf10.gif>
Ho! Ho! Ho! Merry Xmas!

[furie]

A boy went to a Halloween party with a sheet on his head.
"Are you a ghost ?" asked his friends
"No, I'm an unmade bed !"

.................silence......

<img src="http://tseery.homestead.com/files/thansurfadam.jpg" width=300 height=100>
<marquee behavior="alternate"><a href="aim:goim?screenname=furie1335&message=You_are_Number_6">IM:Furie1335
</a></marquee>

<marquee>Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty was an egg?
</marquee>

[FelixDasGato]

What do demons have for breakfast ?
Devilled eggs!

Hey didnt say they had to be good ones.

<IMG SRC="http://www.silentspic.com/images/sighost/felixdasgato.jpg">
Thanks to SilentSpic for hosting.

[Mary]

What does a girl ghost want to be when she grows up? A Boo-tiful dancer! <P>

[GaryWyze]

<font color=purple>A man with a wooden leg is going to a halloween party, so he visits a costume shop.

He tells the clerk that he needs a costume, but doesn't have much to spend.

The clerk goes in the back and comes out again with a pair of Dockers, a sweater from the Gap and a Chris Robinson blow up doll and tells him to go as Rory Hamptons.... all for only $100.00, "too much" the one legged guy says.



Not to be discouraged, the clerk goes in the back again and comes out with some pillows and a huge orange bed sheet. He tells the guy to tie the pillows around his waist, wrap the bed sheet around himself, and go as Billy Staples.... all this for only $25.00, "too much" the one legged man replies.

"Well, How much do you have to spend today" asks the clerk, to which the one legged man tells him that he has about a two bucks.

Pissed off, the clerk storms off to the back and returns with a bag of shit. "Here" he says, "eat this and go as Joe Poo."

Yeah, yeah, save your breath. I've already been called a retard in another thread!</font>

[whale_JUNK]

did you hear about the irish guy who won the lottery on halloween?

he hired a butler to beat his wife!

<IMG SRC=http://www.geocities.com/whalers77/night_vision/meerkats.JPG>

[Ralphy Ramone]

Q:Is there life after death?

A: Yes,you get laid in your coffin!

<img src=http://publish.hometown.aol.com/turkishtaffy1/myhomepage/100logo.jpg?mtbrand=AOL_US>

[Gwen]

did you hear about the
irish guy who won the lottery on
halloween?
he hired a butler to beat his wife!


Lol, WhaleJunk, just because
you write on halloween, doesnt
make that a halloween joke, but
its still really funny!

And Gary, I give you 2 gold stars,
one for making up your own joke
and the other for your purple
writing.


<img src=http://robie.nine-zero.com:443/files/dynamitediva/waynesig.jpg>

[Earth2RON]

A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween party. The wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need for his good time to be spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain, and, as it was still early, decided to go to the party. In as much as her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him.

She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there. His wife went up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new stuff that had just arrived.

She let him go as far as he wished, naturally, since he was her husband. Finally he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had a good time. Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home and put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behavior.

She was sitting up reading when he came in and asked what kind of a time he had. He said, "Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there." Then she asked, "Did you dance much?"

He replied, "I'll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening. But you're not going to believe what happened to the guy I loaned my costume to!"


<img src="http://rfnetearth2ron.50megs.com/images/e2rjam.jpg">




This message was edited by Earth2RON on 10-16-02 @ 5:29 PM