Giving birth- should the guy be in the room?

[fatty]

i say no. all i hear about is how a guy can't look at his wife the same way after she gives birth.

there's all this fluid and blood and ripping and i hear the girls shits herself and stuff. ugh, i don't need to see that.

i'll stay right outside the room and i'll help her throughout the pregnacy, but i don't want to see the "magic happen" what are your thoughts

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[Jennitalia]

i think he should be in the room.
i was actually in the room when a friend of mine had her second baby. the father was also there, but he's such a waste of life and wasn't supportive or anything at all.

it was pretty fascinating and scary. and it happened so fast. her water broke at 10am, and i met them at the hospital around 11. she was in the prep room and was leaking this brownish fluid, but it wasnt really icky. as the contractions got worse, i helped her walk around and then all of the sudden, she was ready to push. she had the baby at 1pm. the room we were in was really tiny, and i wanted to see him come out, but there really wasnt room for me, so i held my friend's hand and helped support her back. the father did nothing.
the funny thing was that the doctors originally told her she was having a girl, so she went and bought all girl clothes and stuff. she ended up having a boy

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[Patches]

I have to go with yes. The dude'll think twice before asking for sex right away.

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[TheMojoPin]

Nope. I'm gonna be one of those old skool dads, pacing in the waiting room, tie undone, smoking a million cigarettes, and then I'll pass out cigars to all the boys when the little bundle of joy arrives.

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"You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."
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[Tazz]

I plan to be. She is going through tons of pain to give birth to my child. It's the least I can do.

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[smiler grogan]

Give me the fedora and the smokes. Theres no way i can see myself in that room, besides i'd definetely be no help any blood or anything internal becoming external and im out the door.

[fatty]

I plan to be. She is going through tons of pain to give birth to my child. It's the least I can do


i understand this reasoning but for me it doesn't beat out a lifetime of scarred images. i want to picture my wife a sexy goddess the rest of my life,not some fluid spouting screaming maniac.

i'm joking a tad but overall it's how i feel. it's just not me i guess.

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[Contra]

i'd want to be in there. just to see my child born is something that i'd want to see. plus the baby mama will always have that to hold over your head if you don't. so it could be a lifetime of scarred memories or a lifetime of her constantly bringing up how you weren't in there.

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[silera]

The first tiime I gave birth, my ex-husband was in the room.

He said, "This hurts me more than you." I had a contraction at that moment and gripped his balls to try and redirect my pain.

Needless to say, he wasn't there the second time I gave birth.




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[FelixDasGato]

I'd say be in the room, do the hand holding and breathing thing but stay above the waist. There is no reason to look directly as the "magic" happens.

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[furie]

I say no. The guy can serve no useful purpose there. It should be the woman, maybe her sister, mother, and a few of her girlfriends.

my father wasn't there for mine, or my sister's births. He was working for my sisters' births and down the block in a bar for mine.

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[Halfpops]

I alway's said I'd never be there. But,I was there for both of my kids birth's- I'm glad I was- hearing that first cry and holding my wifes hand- The (2) best days of my life.



Just Get It Done!

[DroopyGirl]

Ok I can imagine that it can be really scary for a guy to watch, but I think I would be just as scared while giving birth.. there are soo many things that can go wrong.
And I think that the guy just has to be a man for atleast a few hours.
(not that I would ever want to have kids.. brr)

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[ChrisTheCop]

So far teh most interesting thing about this post is..SILERA HAS 2 KIDS?? Ive never seen u in person, but i saw that infamous pic! Anyhoo....as far as whether i'd be in the delivery room, id say yes. to give support to her, but also to experience a really amazing thing that u dont see everyday. And i would think it bonds u even more with your loved one. BUT i think this should be decided on a case by case basis.

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[TheMojoPin]

and down the block in a bar for mine.

Hot damn, that's the manliest thing EVER. I'd respect my dad so much more if he had had the balls to pull that off.

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[TheMojoPin]

I'll just be there when the doc is stitching her back up...he'll give me a look when he thinks that's enough, and I'll just flash the international sign for "eh, let's go for a little more"...

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"You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."
-TMP

[Sheeplovr]

Im goign to say be in the room but DO NOT
i repete

DO NOT LOOK at the area cause like iv seen alot of births on TV and its got to be horible in person jsut blood and yummy placenta

Btu be next to her and hold her hand and be like hey baby its all ganan be okay

number 333 its the way to be
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[Earth2RON]

there's all this fluid and blood and ripping and i hear the girls shits herself and stuff. ugh, i don't need to see that
Thats why i dont wanna see the area while the birth is going on, i will be by my woman' side during the birth but my eyes will be looking at her and no where else!

I'm the man so its my duty to be by her side holding her hand and talking her through the biggest moment in both or lives!

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[Bill From Yorktown]

wouldnt have missed it for anything. So much going on so fast you dont see much of the "yucky stuff" although I dont recommend looking when the placenta comes out afterwards (but you're busy with the new baby and calling people at that point anyway arent you :-) )

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[TheGameHHH]

I plan on being there, but I'm pretty sure I'll pass out during the actual birth.

IT'S TIME TO PLAY THE GAME-AHHH!

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[TheMojoPin]

yummy placenta

Who else loves yogurt?

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"You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."
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[Arienette]

i think it would be good if he were in the room but not like checking out the action. he could be up top, by his chick's head, talking to her or holding her hand (or getting it broken) or whatever. but it would be bad if he were to see what was going on down there...

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[fiestygal]

HELL MOTHA FUCKIN YEA!!!

If a guy knocked the bitch up HELLZ YEA his ass better be in that delivery room...selfish bastards...adn if the couple was DUMB enough NOT to use a condom well now they gotta deal with a rugrat....DAMN!!!

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[Yerdaddy]

I would deffinitely want to be there for the most important day of my life, to see the arrival of the most important person I will ever know, to support the woman I love and comfort her and show her that I will be there for her through thick and thin. And to make sure the kid's not black or something.

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Yo bald-headed granny

[Christy]

I say no.


Damn, then tell Zathrus I'll be her coach!


I plan to be. She is going through tons of pain to give birth to my child. It's the least I can do.


That has to the sweetest thing I've ever heard! :-)



This message was edited by Christy on 10-16-02 @ 11:16 PM

[Death Metal Moe]

After the Horror of Don and MIke, and the terror that is Leykis, NOTHING can scare me anymore. I'm numb to pain.

I'd be there. That way I could start yelling at the little bastard right from birth. Now TAKE OUT THE TRASH, and STOP your Tomfoolery!

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[Yerdaddy]

and if he takes too long "DON'T MAKE ME COME IN THERE AND GET YOU!"

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[HordeKing1]

I couldn't imagine NOT being there. The way I see it, if you cared enough to be present for the conception, you should care enough to be present for the birth.

The births themselves were indescribably beautiful and very emotionally intimate and bonding.

Of course there are some "gooshy" moments, biology is messy. So what? It's just not relevant.

You'll find your wife just as beautiful and as sexually appealing as before. Maybe even more so.



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[Yerdaddy]

You'll find your wife just as beautiful and as sexually appealing as before. Maybe even more so.
Yea, I always rub one out during the alien-popping-out-of-the-guy's-stomach scene in the original Alien flick. Hot stuff!

This is not a joke either, I really do.

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Yo bald-headed granny

[EffMeBoobs]

i want to picture my wife a
sexy goddess the rest of my
life,not some fluid spouting
screaming maniac.



Fatty I understand your feelings
here. I think that by the time you
plan to have children, your
feelings might change. Hell, it
might change at that very
moment that it happens. That
moment is one of the most
precious moments in your life.
You're actually bringing life into
the world. I agree with Horde
King, you just might find your wife
to be the sexiest goddess than
she ever was! It's a pure bonding
moment and most do want to be
there. They are so caught up in
the moment that they don't even
realize the blood and stuff.
Actually all that "gory" stuff that's
portrayed in movies is not all that
"gory." It's blood and liquid, but
big deal we're human and that's
what we're made of. Besides
right after the baby comes out,
you'll be right by her head with
the baby in her arms, both of you
will be happy, crying and cooing
over the baby while the doctor
takes care of all the afterbirth and
placenta which is the most
"goriest" part of the whole
experience. I've seen a few
deliveries and believe me, the
man loses his whole man pride
thing just for that one moment.


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[Serial]

Sure.
there's all this fluid and blood and ripping and i hear the girls shits herself and stuff. ugh, i don't need to see that.

I'd say be in the room, do the hand holding and breathing thing but stay above the waist. There is no reason to look directly as the "magic" happens.Exactly. Just stay above the waist and be supportive. Remember one thing: the doctor may make the process sound interesting enough to watch but, DO NOT FALL FOR THIS!! Hold your ground AWAY from the "magic" and you'll be fine. Trust me.
I had a contraction at that moment and gripped his balls to try and redirect my pain.Alkey, here's something for ya to remember just in case you ever say something is going to hurt you more than her...unless of course, you're beating yourself unmercifully for some reason.

I'm over here now. I lost the sig that Hybrid made me. I'm so lost here...help.

[Yerdaddy]

all the afterbirth and
placenta which is the most
"goriest" part of the whole
experience.
So it's true that the woman eats the placenta for the nutrients in the milk!!? FREAKS!! No way can I watch that shit!

Wait... Do they cook it nowadays? That might actually be kinda good with like garlic or a nice pesto... OK. I'm back in.

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Yo bald-headed granny

[FUNKMAN]

i feel the man should be in the room...
i was there for both my daughters births and glad i was...
it seems that I did provide some support except when i made my wife laugh while she was having a contraction, man did she get pissed...
due to the amazement of the whole thing you don't even think about the blood, placenta, etc...
one thing that gave me a chill is when they cut her at the base of the vagina to prevent tearing...
hey, that's your children your watching being born, there's nothing greater in this world you could create then another life...
but i always say, "there's no greater love than the love of family but on the other side there is no greater hurt if they get hurt or pass away"

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This message was edited by FUNKMAN on 10-17-02 @ 4:52 PM

[Coco]

I don't feel that anyone should be forced to do anything they don't want. But, I think guys should give extra consideration if the lady wants you to be there.

______________________

We can't change our past, but we can change the way we look at it - into something more positive

[Donnielimes]

HELL NO We're paying for everything and now you want us to watch too. We were in the room at the important part. this is the woman's SPECIAL Time.

[BrianTheBailBondsman]

Yeah if you want me to puke, i'll d it the old fashioned way .pace in the waiting room handing out cigars ( keeping the cubans for our friends) AND PASSING OUT MY BIZ CARD TO PAY FOR THE LITTLE BUNDLE OF JOY

a/k/a JOEY D' when I call the Show.

[HordeKing1]

FUNKMAN - It's called an episiotomy, and the principle is that the healing will proceed faster and better with a controlled cut than jagged rips.

Plus if you slip the obstetrician a few bucks he might put in a few extra stiches.

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[SoccerMom]

My husband was in the room for all three of our children including one c-section. As a nurse, I've seen it from both sides of the table and you really get so caught up in the emotion of it all you really don't notice the gross stuff as much as you think you will. Except maybe the episiotomy, a definite look away situation. If you really can't handle it, just look at her and don't look down until the baby's delivered. It really is one of the most amazing things you can experience.

[fiestygal]

hey fellas...dont forget to ask for "the daddy stitch"..hehe ...its like shes 16 again

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this pic is thanx to E2R..I'll get off my SOAP BOX now!...
I am a goofball & swell to boot

[SoccerMom]

During my third delivery my OB said if we were going to keep doing this my husband had better learn how it's done and had him sit down by him for the delivery. Durin my episiotomy repair I actually heard my doctor tell my husband "after this you'll never know she had a baby". If I hadn't been holding an innocent child I would have closed my legs and knocked both their heads together, but I have to admit he did good work!

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[Gvac]

I would do whatever my wife asked me to do. If she wanted me there, fine. If she started screaming "get the hell out of here" I'd be more than fine with that, too.

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Thanks, JerseyRich!

[fatty]

i am amazed at what intelligent conversation went on in this thread, i really think i may have been swayed.

i was kinda up in the air on this, i was leaning more towards not although most of my reasoning here was exaggerated for the sake of joke.

but if my wife really wanted me there i would be there, and what a lot of you are saying is that if i stay up top away from ground zero then i should be okay. screw it hopefully i'll be so drunk i won't even know what's going on. (again, i'm kidding. i'll be high)

but i'm not cutting any cords of any kind, so don't even ask!

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[TheMojoPin]

Even if my wife did want me there, I don't think I could be. Surgical procedures of any sort brings the coward in me screaming right to the surface. Maybe because I haven't had to deal with a long-term, genuinely loving relationship I can still say this, but until then, I'm staying faaaaaaar away from any exploding tookies...

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"You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."
-TMP

This message was edited by TheMojoPin on 10-20-02 @ 2:38 AM

[HordeKing1]

Would it be fair to say that the people who don't want to be in the room, are focused on the biological process, while those who want to be in the room are focusing on the birth of their child and the woman whom they love?

The two perspectives certainly yield different end results.

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[TheMojoPin]

Would it be fair to say that the people who don't want to be in the room, are focused on the biological process, while those who want to be in the room are focusing on the birth of their child and the woman whom they love?

It's gotta be a process of acceptance, right? I doubt ANY guy jumps right from "I love sticking my wang into this thing" to "I can't wait to see my child pushing out of ye olde wang-hole" right away. Nine months is a long time, and it obviously eases the guy into a mode of "yeah, this is natural, I'm OK with this." Me, I haven't had a relationship last longer than a month, so I'm so far from acceptance of the birthing process it's not even funny.

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"You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."
-TMP

[EffMeBoobs]

Plus if you slip the obstetrician a few bucks he might put in a few extra stiches.

I think the chick would slip the obstetrician some big bucks too. Also some non-pregnant chicks would pay mega bucks for this too. It's evolving right up there along with boob implants. The newest craze, the Twat Tightener!

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[TomPoo]

I am going to say NO WAY on this one.

But I am sure my wife will convince me otherwise when the time comes.



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