Mike Teacher
11-06-2002, 08:50 PM
Well; I too must sadly relay my unfortunate encounter with Mr. Whatley at the Hard Rock.
Things seemed nice enough; they were onstage, introducing Superstar and Nurse Mira; I was watching from behind, on the second floor. The second floor; while the bands were on was lightly populated so it was nice and open and you could move around. About 10 minutes later Leaning on a rail, I see Ron, Fez, Rory, Mikey D, Hard Rock Johnny, and a few others. Imagine my horror as I see Fez cursing a blue streak at all of them; something about his microphone sound and how small the stage was and could the Hard Rock staff please keep all these fucking people away from him. I was floored.
I could hardly believe it. Anyway; as soon as people starting gathering on the second floor; Fez was glad-handing and plastering an obviously fake smile as he posed with people. I noticed he was constantly wiping his hands on his pants after every handshake. He was drinking quit a lot, and I had thought he was a tee-totaler. He kept rolling his eyes every time he was asked to be in a picture, but no one took much notice, except me. He kept looking over at me; he had glared at me when he was screaming at the staff, and kept looking at me; he saw that I could see through his veneer of friendliness.
It came to a head when a group of 5 or 6 people in costumes, the three Amigos and a coupe of others [they looked cool] asked Fez for a picture. They all wanted to be in the picture, so one of them looked at me and said *can you take a picture of us with Fez?*İ
Sure! I said, glancing at Fez, I saw him clearly clenching his teeth as hard as he could, his eyes wide like saucers, beaming daggers at me for saying yes.
So, I thought I might as well play his game, so when they were all with their arms around Fez and they were smiling and Fez had that plaster smile on; I kept faking that the flash was off, then it was on zoom instead of wide-angle, and asking them what buttons to push. They didn*İt want to look away from me, as it would spoil the photo, so as they instructed me what to do, Fez looks at me and clearly mouths, *You*K..Fucking*K*KAsshole*İ. He did it like I was deaf and he was making sure I could read his lips.
Anyway I take a bunch of photos, watching Mr. Whatley turn absolutely purple at one point, and as the group turns to leave, Fez looks around quickly, sees we are alone, as, fast as a blur, he puts out both hands and shoves me bodily into the Men*İs Room!
I slam through the door ripping the sleeve of my costume, losing my balance, and going down on one knee. The concrete floor sent a jolt of pain up through my femur. I heard a wet, snapping sound and my Kneecap audibly popped.
*Here Fuckface, take a photo of this!...*İ Fez said as he wound up from six feet away, and just like a place-kicker, met my nose with his foot at about 80mph. Everything went white for a second, then black spots as I almost fainted. I reeled back, then looked down to see the blood pooling in my lap. I had an urge to puke, and my hearing was almost gone, replaced by a high ring.
I tried to get up but Fez leg swept me, collapsing the good leg, sending me to the floor on my stomach. My head hit the concrete and black spots were swimming in my now-doubled vision. Another flash in my peripheral vision and Fez plants on knee in the small of my back, and grabs my head with his hands. He wrenches my neck, pulling my face, a mass of blood, sweat, tears, and caked snot about an inch from his, where he deadpans, *thanks for coming tonight. Speak a word about this and I will Fucking END You.*İ With that he looked at me, I think; I couldn*İt see much as the blood has blinded one eye, and the other was all tunnel-vision. To my Horror, I watch as his neck snapped back, and he let loose a huge wad of snot/spit directly into my face. In my shock and horror, I watched as he got up; brushed himself off, and poked his head out the door. I guess the coast was clear, as I heard him say *JOHHHNNNYYYYY!!!!!!*İ. I guess it was Hard Rock Johnny; I couldn*İt really tell as my vision was still
Things seemed nice enough; they were onstage, introducing Superstar and Nurse Mira; I was watching from behind, on the second floor. The second floor; while the bands were on was lightly populated so it was nice and open and you could move around. About 10 minutes later Leaning on a rail, I see Ron, Fez, Rory, Mikey D, Hard Rock Johnny, and a few others. Imagine my horror as I see Fez cursing a blue streak at all of them; something about his microphone sound and how small the stage was and could the Hard Rock staff please keep all these fucking people away from him. I was floored.
I could hardly believe it. Anyway; as soon as people starting gathering on the second floor; Fez was glad-handing and plastering an obviously fake smile as he posed with people. I noticed he was constantly wiping his hands on his pants after every handshake. He was drinking quit a lot, and I had thought he was a tee-totaler. He kept rolling his eyes every time he was asked to be in a picture, but no one took much notice, except me. He kept looking over at me; he had glared at me when he was screaming at the staff, and kept looking at me; he saw that I could see through his veneer of friendliness.
It came to a head when a group of 5 or 6 people in costumes, the three Amigos and a coupe of others [they looked cool] asked Fez for a picture. They all wanted to be in the picture, so one of them looked at me and said *can you take a picture of us with Fez?*İ
Sure! I said, glancing at Fez, I saw him clearly clenching his teeth as hard as he could, his eyes wide like saucers, beaming daggers at me for saying yes.
So, I thought I might as well play his game, so when they were all with their arms around Fez and they were smiling and Fez had that plaster smile on; I kept faking that the flash was off, then it was on zoom instead of wide-angle, and asking them what buttons to push. They didn*İt want to look away from me, as it would spoil the photo, so as they instructed me what to do, Fez looks at me and clearly mouths, *You*K..Fucking*K*KAsshole*İ. He did it like I was deaf and he was making sure I could read his lips.
Anyway I take a bunch of photos, watching Mr. Whatley turn absolutely purple at one point, and as the group turns to leave, Fez looks around quickly, sees we are alone, as, fast as a blur, he puts out both hands and shoves me bodily into the Men*İs Room!
I slam through the door ripping the sleeve of my costume, losing my balance, and going down on one knee. The concrete floor sent a jolt of pain up through my femur. I heard a wet, snapping sound and my Kneecap audibly popped.
*Here Fuckface, take a photo of this!...*İ Fez said as he wound up from six feet away, and just like a place-kicker, met my nose with his foot at about 80mph. Everything went white for a second, then black spots as I almost fainted. I reeled back, then looked down to see the blood pooling in my lap. I had an urge to puke, and my hearing was almost gone, replaced by a high ring.
I tried to get up but Fez leg swept me, collapsing the good leg, sending me to the floor on my stomach. My head hit the concrete and black spots were swimming in my now-doubled vision. Another flash in my peripheral vision and Fez plants on knee in the small of my back, and grabs my head with his hands. He wrenches my neck, pulling my face, a mass of blood, sweat, tears, and caked snot about an inch from his, where he deadpans, *thanks for coming tonight. Speak a word about this and I will Fucking END You.*İ With that he looked at me, I think; I couldn*İt see much as the blood has blinded one eye, and the other was all tunnel-vision. To my Horror, I watch as his neck snapped back, and he let loose a huge wad of snot/spit directly into my face. In my shock and horror, I watched as he got up; brushed himself off, and poked his head out the door. I guess the coast was clear, as I heard him say *JOHHHNNNYYYYY!!!!!!*İ. I guess it was Hard Rock Johnny; I couldn*İt really tell as my vision was still