Yeah Guy?
12-24-2002, 09:05 AM
A little elf slipped me this letter.
Dear Santa,
Well, as you know Santa this year hasn't been too good to me. I got beat up and thrown off the show and even the interns have more responsibility than me. I got caught sleeping at the dump button for O and A (zzz wee wee wee I'm gay) and got them thrown off the air. I've kissed more men than women this year and I think I like it (keep those boys coming Santa) And as you know I got my diploma ripped up after I got bitch slapped around the ring by Black Earl. Rory also pimp slapped me after I tried to chicken out of a fight (what does Thunderdome rules even mean Santa?) Luckily, I knew I was going to lose those fights so I had a list of excuses ready to go even before I lost.
My one chance at true love was ruined by Billy Staples when he attacked me and my lover on a nice carriage ride in Central Park with water balloons. I really loved that woman and we had the same bald hairdo.
I've pissed on myself, ruined WNEW, been tied up in leather by men, made out with guys, gave a 30 dollar wedding present, been beat up countless times, punched walls (I'll show those interns how tough I am!), had my head shaved, drank hot sauce, had my gay love pinball present smashed, turned down chicks, and had to drink hot sauce.
So, as you can see Santa I know this year hasn't been good so all I'll ask for is a new job. I'd like to go to a radio station that I can tear it down from the bottom up. I need to lose Infinity more millions of dollars. You see Santa, the only thing I do well is ruin radio stations and love other men.
So Santa, can you please make Tom Chiasano transfer me to another station so I can wreck it? Please?
Love,
Al Dukes
P.S. Don't tell Infinity management that they're paying me a Master's degree salary to do an intern's job!
Dear Santa,
Well, as you know Santa this year hasn't been too good to me. I got beat up and thrown off the show and even the interns have more responsibility than me. I got caught sleeping at the dump button for O and A (zzz wee wee wee I'm gay) and got them thrown off the air. I've kissed more men than women this year and I think I like it (keep those boys coming Santa) And as you know I got my diploma ripped up after I got bitch slapped around the ring by Black Earl. Rory also pimp slapped me after I tried to chicken out of a fight (what does Thunderdome rules even mean Santa?) Luckily, I knew I was going to lose those fights so I had a list of excuses ready to go even before I lost.
My one chance at true love was ruined by Billy Staples when he attacked me and my lover on a nice carriage ride in Central Park with water balloons. I really loved that woman and we had the same bald hairdo.
I've pissed on myself, ruined WNEW, been tied up in leather by men, made out with guys, gave a 30 dollar wedding present, been beat up countless times, punched walls (I'll show those interns how tough I am!), had my head shaved, drank hot sauce, had my gay love pinball present smashed, turned down chicks, and had to drink hot sauce.
So, as you can see Santa I know this year hasn't been good so all I'll ask for is a new job. I'd like to go to a radio station that I can tear it down from the bottom up. I need to lose Infinity more millions of dollars. You see Santa, the only thing I do well is ruin radio stations and love other men.
So Santa, can you please make Tom Chiasano transfer me to another station so I can wreck it? Please?
Love,
Al Dukes
P.S. Don't tell Infinity management that they're paying me a Master's degree salary to do an intern's job!