Billy Staples IMDB Bio

[MikeInFairfax]

Born in Long Island, New York, Hine was a 5 letter athlete in high school. His father died in 1969 while on a fishing trip. His mother is a hotdog vendor at the Nassau Colliseum on Long Island. He got the nickname "Billy Staples" after having a stomach stapling surgery due to his morbid obesity. He was a regular on the Opie and Anthony radio show, originally going by the nickname "Fat Guy". He was a founder of Airsick Productions - which produced parody songs for radio. An admitted alcoholic and drug addict, he has been through rehab 17 times.

He is twice divorced, with one daughter, and currently lives in his mother's basement. He is the phone screener / intern for the Ron and Fez radio show, and a sometime stand-up comic. He previously worked as a bar bouncer and garbage man.

Gained notoriety for a complete mental collapse during a live stand-up show at the Count Basie Theater in Redbank, New Jersey. Staples (using the name Billy Hine) was the first guest on the John Edwards show. He is currently represented by GreenBee management.
http://us.imdb.com/Bio?Staples,%20Billy

[Christy]

Wow! All summed up, huh?

Loved this Billy quote ...

"I am at the point in my career where I am above open auditions."


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[Christy]

Wow! All summed up, huh?

Loved this Billy quote ...

"I am at the point in my career where I am above open auditions."


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[ChickenHawk]

Fuckin' hilarious. Now all we need is that 8" by 10" for his headshot.

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"Just back 'n jack." -Ron
"It looks like brown Cool Whip." -Fez
FUCK VIACOM*FUCK INFINITY*FUCK BAD MUSIC

[reeshy]

I'll bet his mom is real proud of him!!

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[Steels]

I LOVE IT!!!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

BRAVO!!!

BRAVO!!!!!

<img src=http://members.aol.com/vikorynotvengnce/images/steels3.gif>

[The Nature Boy]

LOL, that's classic stuff! I needed a good laugh tonight! I say the pic that goes up should be the closeups after billy fell "up" the stairs.

DOE-DEE-DOE-DEE-DOE-DEE-DOO!

Bon Jovi Fan Since Day ONE!

[satan-2]

waa haa hahahaha (fell off chair)

god is an absentee LANDLORD!!!

later

[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

For those wondering what the hell this is about:

http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/viewmessages.cfm?Forum=46&Topic=24849&RequestTimeout=50

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thank you dcpete!

I'm a big wheel down at the cracker factory.

[Quinn]

Someone should submit the pictures from the paintball shootings as his official photo.

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[zoom2457]

Tom from Hoboken for President!!!

That was too fuckin funny...

I love when Fez ends up on the floor.

[mikeyb]

OMG! That's so funny. I'm dyin' over here.

________
The Day After Man
<BR><a href="http://blog.mikebrowne.com" border="no" target="_blank"><IMG src="http://www.mikebrowne.com/blog/mb_blog.jpg"></a>

[kc7586]

that is the funniest and most pathetic thing i've read in a while.

<center>
<img src="http://czm.racknine.net/images/kc1.jpg">
</center>
<center>
Thanks for the sig CZM!
</center>

I am woman hear me roar, bitch, and whine.

[Crippler]

I agree that the 'official' headshot should be one of the shots from after his accident, but once we figure out how to get a picture up there, we should flood the site with shots of Billy (chicken parm-man outfit, etc.).

SigPic thanks to TenbatsuZen
http://pic5.picturetrail.com/VOL77/857148/1548180/18137301.jpg
...silent, but violent.
[center](Miles)[center]

[puffyvagluver]

this is fuckin great

SEEE YA

[SatCam]

Staples is a really cool guy!

<img src=http://www.tufts.edu/med/medissue/Newissue_for_10-05-02/Leisure/Leisure%20Images/fat-man.jpg>

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Devilish: Sig #27
RIP... The Ron and Fez Show in NY
RIP... WNEW-FM Talk Format
<A HREF=http://www.satelitecam.tk>>>Sig Pic Archive + RnF Site</A>
<font size=1><i>People Emailing Me:</i> Sorry, I have drops, but not many bits, especially old ones and ones from the past few days. Sorry!</font>

[EffMeBoobs]

Congrats Tom! Tom is really the best.

<img src=http://hometown.aol.com/lqqieee/effmenew.gif>

[Quinn]

I believe that to upload a picture, one needs to just click on the generic insert publicity shot to the left of his name/stats

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[skurbs]

for my dc friends - here is the copy of the redbank collapse i was talking about :)

Watching Billy Staples' set at the Count Basie Theatre fell somewhere between witnessing a seal clubbing and watching Robert DiNero play Russian roulette in a Vietnam prison camp. Billy Staples, a stand up comedian and regular on the Ron and Fez show, performed in front of the sold out crowd at the recent Jim Norton show on August 10th.

Well I shouldn't really say performed, it was more like he was ripped to shreds by the ravenous hoards of fans that made up the audience. The show, which was hosted by stand up comic Rich Vos, was to feature a small set by Billy Staples. I think the whole ordeal lasted about five minutes, though I'm sure it felt like two or three days of prison time for Billy. Prison shower time. Believe it or not, thirty seconds into his routine people were actually asking for Vos back. Despite the fact that Vos is usually referred to as being "as funny as cancer", its all a big joke- the man's a great comic. Even with all the heckling he had to deal with; he pulled it off. If only Billy could have been so lucky.

Even before the giant orange shirt wearing Billy Staples put his first foot on stage, the cries of "You Suck", "Go Home" and "Kill Yourself" hit the poor sap like a bag of hate. There really wasn't anything he could do to help things. That's the truth. The crowd would have hurled insults at sick children. There were however some things he could do to make it worse, and that's where Billy shined brightest. Now I'm no stand up doctor, but I'll be willing to bet that any joke that starts out with- "Anyone ever have a colonoscopy?" is not going to go over too well with a bunch of drunken twenty year olds. And when the punch line is- "It's a real pain in the ass" you might as well throw a bag of ground beef in your pants and spend the afternoon at Louie Anderson's place. Sure enough that's the direction Billy went, even asking hecklers to repeat their insults. I think there was even a Fabio joke in there. Bad move, poor fella.

The headliner for the evening did not dissappoint. Jim Norton was great. Yet even during his set, people were screaming out nonsense. How awesome is it when that happens? Makes you stop for a second and think, "Sure, I came to see Jim Norton perform, but man am I ever happy that some drunken jackass in Row N keeps shouting out the same failed joke over and over". Nothing spells out funny like a slobbering mess vying for a few seconds in the spotlight. Regardless, Norton put on a really funny show, and the crowd loved it. The theatre had a lot of energy, and it was definitely a great performance. It was just about the best part of the night. The best part that is, until later on that evening when Lady Di and Marion (the retarded Laverne and Shirley from Opie and Anthony fame), danced at the Walt Street Pub. That pulls on the old american heart strings, both of those messes, in all their busted glory, slopping down glasses of Budweiser and trying to forget.

If only Billy could.


<img src="http://www.anncoulter.org/images/sig02.gif">
<font face="arial"> skurbs (tom from hoboken)</font>

This message was edited by skurbs on 2-11-03 @ 8:59 PM

[Death Metal Moe]

Now all we need is that 8" by 10" for his headshot


Jersey Rich?

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<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
BACON FACTION 4 LIFE!
<A HREF="http://www.pub21.ezboard.com/bonaarmy">JOIN THE O&A ARMY!!!</A>

[ChickenHawk]

"Remember this face. You're dead to me."

<IMG SRC="http://wwfallon.50megs.com/karmasig.gif">
"Just back 'n jack." -Ron
"It looks like brown Cool Whip." -Fez
FUCK VIACOM*FUCK INFINITY*FUCK BAD MUSIC

[dymod]

Notice the conspicuous
absence of any rape
references.


<img src="http://www.danielmodell.com/temp/radio/rf_dy_sig.gif">

[Fetus4Lif]

wheres the story about the wife swapping and the landlord ? again TOM for Prez - too funny !

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"Ron Bennington from WNEW's "The Ron and Fez Show" has said, "God is putting the band back together". In a way that's a comforting thought. Unless of course your last name ends in Ramone."

[El Mudo]

I'll bet his mom is real proud of him!!


Whatever happened to that really funny picture someone made in photoshop of Billy's "momma"?

Oakland Raiders: 13-5
Next: SUPER BOWL XXXVII vs. Tampa!!
Rich Gannon: Your 2002 NFL MVP!!
Bill Callahan for Coach of the Year!!
El queso es viejo y moldio. ¨D¢nde est* el cuarto de ba¤o?

[nowimhungry]

Christy, you were close...now we need a 44 Magnum for his head shot.

In the 80s, a guy on a cell phone looked like he had a loaf of bread up to his ear.
--- Ron

[saveopieanthony.net]

this is probably one of the funniest things i have...i've bookmarked the site

BIG ASS CARD HOLDER 316006 r+f are gone. Al is still gay. and Billy is still a drunk. and a waste. and sad. I even miss Billy.

SEEEEEYAAAAA

[saveopieanthony.net]

this is probably one of the funniest things i have...i've bookmarked the site

BIG ASS CARD HOLDER 316006 r+f are gone. Al is still gay. and Billy is still a drunk. and a waste. and sad. I even miss Billy.

SEEEEEYAAAAA

[lippy]

God, I can't get enough of Billy. Most irony in one human being, ever.

[donnie_darko]

maybe the irony bursted his staples?

for some reason his gay porn appearances aren't listed......

[skurbs]

Finally! the pirate comic triva question is up! and the height is fixed! billy the midget drunken pirate comic.

<img src="http://www.anncoulter.org/images/sig02.gif">
<font face="arial"> skurbs (tom from hoboken)</font>



This message was edited by skurbs on 2-15-03 @ 6:01 PM

[Jay Phat Buds]

I cant believe how easy it is to add info on the IMDB i got the Jay Mohr Paulie thing on personally and it only took a few days