happiest couples are those who don't make noise when their partner passes gas.

[jocefus]

LOS ANGELES (Wireless Flash) -- If you want a happy marriage, don't raise a stink about your partner's farts.
According to L.A.-based social psychologist Susan Perry, the happiest couples are those who don't make noise when their partner passes gas.

It's not that the gas is good. Perry says couples that are pro-pooter are simply more at ease with each other -- and that is good for any relationship.

She figures a woman who feels comfortable enough to burp in front of her sweetie is probably secure in the relationship and won't ask, "Do you think I'm fat?" every two seconds.

Also, a guy won't feel commitment-phobic if he can bust a butt-buzzer in front of a gal who responds, "That was a good one."

Perry sounds off about farting and other relationship issues in her new book, "Loving In Flow: How The Happiest Couples Get And Stay That Way" (Sourcebooks).


i guess it all depends where and how you fart.. if you're one to tear ass and pull your wifes head under the covers then shes gonna be pissed... just dont fart when making love and say "my compliments to the chef" that just leads to trouble...

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sig courtesy of amy

www.mp3.com/mollydoll

honk if your horny

knockin boots and shootin pool

[DreamWeaver]

I always fart in my relationships. I have no shame.

http://blakjeezis.homestead.com/files/ginani.gif

[silera]

Alkey farts on me while we sleep.

I go fart in the bathroom.



<center>http://groups.yahoo.com/group/silera/files/Silera/sig4.gif

<font size=3><font color=red>I can't stand myself either.</font></font></center>
<font color=white>

[stickyfingers]

wow...this is my kinda topic

i can't burp hence i fart more than the average bear....on any given morning but especially after a night of drinking beer i wake up loaded for bear...she calls it her alarm clock b/c it usually is the first thing she wakes up to.....the first couple of months were hell but then i couldn't take it anymore, let loose, and now am a happy, yet stinky, man




"lemme tell ya sumpin" -CW

[jocefus]

the best fart is the morning fart...you roll over and next thing you know it sounds like you have a flock of ducks in your room

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sig courtesy of amy

www.mp3.com/mollydoll

honk if your horny

knockin boots and shootin pool

[SuperClerk]

I'm thinking of the scene in "Mallrats" between Brodie and TS. When Brodie says he farted while his girlfriend (Shannen Doherty) was going down on him.

<img src=http://members.aol.com/vikorynotvengnce/images/superclerktemp.gif>
Thanks to Toddevf for sig pic

[HordeKing1]

I wonder how they selected the subjects of this study? Did they measure the decibel volume of the farts, or it's pungency, or were there complex equations combining these and other factors?

Enquiring noses want to know?

<img src="http://members.aol.com/rnfpantera/hking1">

[TrailerTrash]

my guy makes loud stinky ones. i'll look at him and he'll get this confused look on his face and look around like he's wondering where the noise came from. we'll both be like 'damn that reeks', laugh, and then we'll go back to watching whatever was on tv at the moment.

<img src="http://www.mindlesswanderings.org/images/trailer1.jpg" width="300" height="100"><br><br>
... look what i just done said ...

[DJEvelEd]

I had to break up with a girl over this. She would CONSTANTLY let loose these silent putrid farts so much that I thought she had B.O. What really ended it for me was when she ripped a wet one while I was eating her out from behind. She got me, my mouth was open.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Big bird is Ferrall's bitch
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

[FatTony]

I had to break up with a girl over this. She would CONSTANTLY let loose these silent putrid farts so much that I thought she had B.O. What really ended it for me was when she ripped a wet one while I was eating her out from behind. She got me, my mouth was open.


That's the sexiest thing I have ever heard. Did it taste like chicken?

<IMG SRC="http://hometown.aol.com/antandone/fattony3.jpg" WIDTH=300 HEIGHT=100>

"They always win in the end."

[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

skidmark farts away all weekend when we're together. It makes him giggle like a school girl. And for every 20 or 30 poots he does, I can come out with the mother of all farts-- the ones that can peel the paint off the wall. Hehehe. He had to burn incense once.

<IMG SRC="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/gpigking/myhomepage/alicesig.gif?mtbrand=AOL_US">
thank you dcpete!

I'm a big wheel down at the cracker factory.

[reeshy]

I used to love it when I would rip a healthy one first thing in the morning and then shove my wife's head under the sheets and keep her there-oh. love is wonderful!!!!!!!!

<IMG SRC=http://www.mst3kinfo.com/images/Globe_an3.gif>

[grlNIN]

skidmark farts away all weekend when we're together. It makes him giggle like a school girl. And for every 20 or 30 poots he does, I can come out with the mother of all farts-- the ones that can peel the paint off the wall. Hehehe. He had to burn incense once.




highlight of my day thanks Alice

Jesus Dont Want Me For A Sunbeam
<IMG SRC=http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=ariam21>


<marquee>What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff-I mean if they're running and they don't look where they're going I have to come out from somewhere and catch them. That's all I'd do all day. I'd just be the Catcher in the rye and all. I know it's crazy, but that's the only thing I'd really like to be. I know it's crazy</marquee>

[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

highlight of my day thanks Alice


I aim to please.

<IMG SRC="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/gpigking/myhomepage/alicesig.gif?mtbrand=AOL_US">
thank you dcpete!

I'm a big wheel down at the cracker factory.

[Iamnotatool]

Fuzzybutt farts are nothing to joke about, they'll put hair on your chest...

Please don't hold my huge nutbag against me, or I'll hold it against you that you have flapjack tits...

[Arienette]

not too long ago, my boyfriend and i were standing in his kitchen. he pulled me over to him and said that i should give him a hug. he sqeezed me hard so that i would squeeze him back, and then he farted. he really, really enjoyed that one.

other times, when we're in bed, he'll purposely come under the covers with me so that he can fart. i do appreciate that.

<center><img src="http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/arisubway.gif" height=100 width=300</img>

we hope your rules and wisdom choke you</center>

This message was edited by Arienette on 4-7-03 @ 8:43 PM

[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

Fuzzybutt farts are nothing to joke about, they'll put hair on your chest...



I may be gassy, but I need love too!

<IMG SRC="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/gpigking/myhomepage/alicesig.gif?mtbrand=AOL_US">
thank you dcpete!

I'm a big wheel down at the cracker factory.

[Dan-E]

the best fart is the morning fart


unless it smells horrid then im not so happy

<img src="C:Ronfez3.gif"><br><a

[Bama]

You're never going to credit Fark are you.

<img src="http://czm.racknine.net/images/bamanation.jpg">
Thanks Bobimpact and CZM!
http://bobimpact.coolfreepage.com

[SuperClerk]

the ones that can peel the paint off the wall.


And it turns out to be the kind of fart that could strip the varnish off a foot locker. The kind of fart that could end a marriage. The kind of fart that makes people run for the exits. Even on airplanes!

<img src=http://members.aol.com/vikorynotvengnce/images/superclerktemp.gif>
Thanks to Toddevf for sig pic

[jocefus]

You're never going to credit Fark are you.

i give fark much props for this topic and ones that i have done using stuff from them...

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sig courtesy of amy

www.mp3.com/mollydoll

honk if your horny

knockin boots and shootin pool

[ShelleBink]

my bf will not fart in front of me. yet the guys i've dated who have farted while with me, i'm still closer with than the guys who didn't. go figure.

<i>...why are you all looking at me like that?</i>

<center><b><FONT FACE="Verdana" SIZE="2"><FONT COLOR="#FF8040">I</FONT><FONT COLOR="#EC8653">R</FONT><FONT COLOR="#D98C66">I</FONT><FONT COLOR="#C59379">S</FONT><FONT COLOR="#B2998C">H</FONT><FONT COLOR="#9F9F9F"> </FONT><FONT COLOR="#9F9F9F">F</FONT><FONT COLOR="#849A84">A</FONT><FONT COLOR="#6A946A">C</FONT><FONT COLOR="#508F50">T</FONT><FONT COLOR="#358A35">I</FONT><FONT COLOR="#1A841A">O</FONT><FONT COLOR="#007F00">N</FONT></FONT></b><br>
<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=bink02"></img></center>

<marquee>
<font color=white>GHOST POST</font></marquee>

[Bama]

The couple that farts together stays together.

I still remember our first dutch oven.
Ahhh, memories :)

<img src="http://czm.racknine.net/images/bamanation.jpg">
Thanks Bobimpact and CZM!
http://bobimpact.coolfreepage.com

[HordeKing1]

For a great read featuring a beautiful woman w/a really bad gas problem (and numerous equally humerous characters) I heartily recommend Tricky Business By Dave Barry (2002).

Dave Barry is "the funniest man in America" (according to his autobiography.)

<img src="http://members.aol.com/rnfpantera/hking1">

[CovDiesel]

I fart more than any man on the planet...


THEGAMEHHH once cleared out a gym because he farted and it smelled so bad... we went into the bathroom to get away from it and it crept under the door like some airborne virus.


I think I eat the wrong things... cause damn it when I fart it sounds like tearing flesh.


I love farts... I wish they were more socially acceptable.

<IMG SRC="http://members.aol.com/dxixrxt/covpigs.jpg">

[Iamnotatool]

My farts smell good to me, and the really bad ones are better. I 'woft' the smell up to my nose if noone is looking. It's a pride thing. Your farts however, can knock a buzzard off a shitwagon.

Please don't hold my huge nutbag against me, or I'll hold it against you that you have flapjack tits...

[TheGameHHH]

THEGAMEHHH once cleared out a gym because he farted and it smelled so bad... we went into the bathroom to get away from it and it crept under the door like some airborne virus.
It was a really big gym too.


<img src= http://wwfallon.homestead.com/files/RFnetTheGameHHH2.jpg>

[A.J.]

This must be part of the reason why my parents are still together after 34 years.

However, my Dad's snoring is worse than his farting.

<IMG SRC="http://www.silentspic.com/images/sighost/ajdcsig.jpg">

A Skidmark production.

http://www.internerd.com/frink.retired/frinkv.2/stuff/littlepc.gif

[TooCute]

he figures a woman who feels comfortable enough to burp in front of her sweetie is probably secure in the relationship and won't ask, "Do you think I'm fat?" every two seconds.


good got do women REALLY do this? I thinkits a myth.

I fart a lot. The Chairman even has a song about it.

<img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/toocute2.gif>
!! 2% !!<font color=white>

[jocefus]

The Chairman even has a song about it.


could you sing a few lines for us..

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sig courtesy of amy

www.mp3.com/mollydoll

honk if your horny

knockin boots and shootin pool

[Arienette]

The Chairman even has a song about it.

could you sing a few lines for us..
or, could he post the whole thing?

<center><img src="http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/arisubway.gif" height=100 width=300</img>

we hope your rules and wisdom choke you</center>

[noahfex]

I think that the happiest couples are the ones that are comfortable with each other to pass gas in front of eachother. I dont know about the no making noise part. Its just to funny when your significant other passes gas infront of you. Especially when your in bed together and you move the covers around and smell something funny and the dont say anything they just laugh. I know that a certain someone would agree with me.

<img src=http://members.aol.com/vikorynotvengnce/images/noahfex.gif>
much thanks to todd evf and dc pete!!!

Prepare for rejection, You'll get no direction from me. -BR