what oprah magazine taught me today

[Hawiian shirt craig]

OK, so i'm taking a post work crap tonight, and as i am sitting there
i have two choices of reading material: O magazine and AARP monthly.
O mag it is. so i flip to an article about 10 things to run from a guy for.
1-9 i'm all set, not me. i figure i'm a keeper at this point. WRONG.
#10 happens to be, that if someone is too normal, had a good life and likes
their family, a chick should run b/c hes probly a ticking emotional time bomb.

FUCK YOU OPRAH!!!!! b/c this has happened to me. girls run away b/c i dont
have enough wrong with me for them to complain about. nothing for them
to try and fix. so gentleman, if you grew up happy, no cares about money,
or mom and dad getting divorced... you're going to die alone acording to
oprah, or as i like to call her "the chocolate cunt who devoures testosterone."


-Hawiian Shirt Craig
THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T
HAVE NICE THINGS!!

<img src=http://www.richstillwell.com/HSC.gif>

anal on the boss' couch since 1982....

[Recyclerz]

FUCK YOU OPRAH!!!!! b/c this has happened to me. girls run away b/c i dont
have enough wrong with me for them to complain about. nothing for them
to try and fix. so gentleman, if you grew up happy, no cares about money,
or mom and dad getting divorced... you're going to die alone acording to
oprah, or as i like to call her "the chocolate cunt who devoures testosterone."


Problem to fix: Anger management issues.

Problem identified; Problem solved. ;-)



[b]You're only young once but you can be immature forever[b]

This message was edited by Recyclerz on 5-31-03 @ 1:45 AM

[silera]

You should have wiped your ass with it.


<center>http://groups.yahoo.com/group/silera/files/Silera/sig4.gif

<font size=3><font color=red>I can't stand myself either.</font></font></center>
<font color=FBF2F7>

[Friday]

I can't STAND normal men. They scare me.

.... but you're still cewl......no worries

<img src=http://czm.racknine.net/images/friday.gif>

Sig by the one and only CZM...owner and proprieter of the Vomit Express!


Shhh....I hear something stupid...

[Immigration Dude]

"the chocolate cunt who devoures testosterone."



"White people are so scared of black people..."

<IMG SRC= http://a4.grp.yahoofs.com/v1/0GzPPmfJjybiAoG9Bcl1qlIefJ-0AE-e6buJT43vByNi9DtwrpbQx7gb5nTMvUy7GweRX5OPpgMLB8uY/sigpic3landfill.JPG>

Master of the Red X

[Arienette]

i think the fact that you chose the oprah magazine over the aarp one is problem enough. the girls should come a-runnin'.

<center><img src="http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/arisnails.gif" height=100 width=300</img>

sometimes the wind blows through the trees
and i think i hear you calling me</center>

[sr71blackbird]

All women are attracted to exactly the wrong man for them.

<img src="http://www.ronfez.net/imagestorage/SR71.jpg">

[East Side Dave]

That's true blackbird. My girlfriend was attracted to me because I'm alive! Can you believe those zombie broads?!?! They're always going for us Aliveys! Fucking dead chicks! Plus, she's black.




.....and she doesn't eat other people's mail.

<img src=http://www.richstillwell.com/ESD.gif>
Big Ass Mafia

[ToddEVF]

oprah is laughing at all men, except Stedman, right now in her huge home on an undisclosed island.

<font size=2 color=333366>
<marquee behavior=alternate scrolldelay=30>I've been Tromatized!</marquee>
</font><IMG SRC=http://members.aol.com/thetoddsterlsp/sigpics/thetoddster6.gif><marquee>hes really the betstst - AngelAmy/todds the man - canofsoup15/todd is the shiznit! - Contra/Toddevf just rocks that much he gets two appriciation threads, but whatever - DCReed/dint mean to come down on him earlier. . . I like Todd - Doogie76/And he supports my nicotine-fits - DynamiteK/But it's great to see the end result with Todd!! - Gaia/How can I be the man if he's the man?!? - FlavorSaver/Todd Rocks and has a HUGE cock. . . so I heard!!!! - Green Lantern/i can actually say that i love the little fuck - GrlNiN/This must be done WITH GERMAN EFFICIANCY! - GrimSanity/Todd Will always be a DARLING! - LatinSpiceXoX/your the bestest, greatest, coolest todd! - Lulu/TODD EVF RULZ THE SCHOOL - NJDMMoe/I like Toddevf. He seems like a fine young gentleman. - pinkyfloyd/I appreciate my Mini-Me! - RonFez Mark/I like the sleezy way Todd puts a watermark in their. Kudos! - SateliteCam/So screw all the Todd-haters! - Shorty/I admire todd's ability to slyly and skillfully turn any and every thread into one about HIM - TheMojoPin</marquee>
<a href=http://www.showchoir.com/~justinc79/troma/terror_media/toddster.wav> The Toddster!!! (sound clip) </a href>
<a href=http://www.lostsanity.net/cgistor/yabb/yabb.pl> Lost Sanity Forum </a href>

[schmega]

you know what would make a normal guy an emotional time bomb?

THE WHORES WHO LISTEN TO OPRAH AND WHINE AND BITCH AND BITCH AND WHINE to the poor guy cuz he's not 'perfect' or doesnt fit the oprah mold or dont talk about their feelings or dont communicate or SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY. fuckin fat bitch.

people should just learn to love the one they're with and be happy. stop looking for something that isnt there or you'll make shit worse.

[Arienette]

THE WHORES WHO LISTEN TO OPRAH AND WHINE AND BITCH AND BITCH AND WHINE to the poor guy cuz he's not 'perfect' or doesnt fit the oprah mold or dont talk about their feelings or dont communicate or SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY. fuckin fat bitchi agree with this almost entirely... all but the "fat bitch" party. not that she's not struggled with her weight, but it just bothers me that THAT'S what people latch on to as an insult instead of the fact that she's a fucking idiot.

the whole oprah thing is moronic. i don't know how women listen to her drivel, and are actually dumb enough to buy into it. it's a truly sad statement about our world.

and of course no one's perfect. and people should decide for themselves what kind of things they are looking for in a companion. fuck oprah's opinion. fucking twits.

<center><img src="http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/arisnails.gif" height=100 width=300</img>

sometimes the wind blows through the trees
and i think i hear you calling me</center>

[schmega]

she's a fucking idiot.

that part is understood. i figured 'why state the obvious?' and you're right, its insensitive to pounce on her weight, but thats what happens when you listen to r&f. fez shows no restraint in calling others fat, and its always funny when he does, especially when he says 'FAT FACE'. so yeah, fuck oprah's stupid opinions and her FAT FACE.

[Hawiian shirt craig]

I can't STAND normal men. They scare me.



friday, i'm by no means normal, you met me at bar 9. but i'm emotionally stable. i was never beaten, molested etc, my parents are still married. i have respect for women, etc etc. and this is what oprah's cunt rag dribbled about.

and i do scare a lot of women, b/c i CAN commit etc. its like they dont see a disaster coming and that scares them more than the potential to get cheated on and beaten. its oogly. OOGLY!!!

-Hawiian Shirt Craig
THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T
HAVE NICE THINGS!!

<img src=http://www.richstillwell.com/HSC.gif>

anal on the boss' couch since 1982....

[Hoojibs]

the whole oprah thing is moronic. i don't know how women listen to her drivel, and are actually dumb enough to buy into it. it's a truly sad statement about our world.

and of course no one's perfect. and people should decide for themselves what kind of things they are looking for in a companion. fuck oprah's opinion. fucking twits


I call people who follow Oprah cattle because you can hear their cowbells ringing when they start stapeding towards their tv whenever this full of herself talkshow host spews nonsense from her mouth.

These people need to make up their own minds on what to believe, read and watch and not moo in aggreement to what "the Oprah" says.

<img src="http://hometown.aol.com/erzengel1/images/batman_sigpic.jpg">

[Hawiian shirt craig]

you can hear their cowbells ringing when they start stapeding towards their tv whenever this full of herself talkshow host spews nonsense from her mouth.


i got a fever... and the only cure is more cowbell... I GOTTA HAVE MORE COWBELL!!!!

-Hawiian Shirt Craig
THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T
HAVE NICE THINGS!!

<img src=http://www.richstillwell.com/HSC.gif>

anal on the boss' couch since 1982....

[JustJon]

O mag it is.
See, the real problem is your latent homosexuality

<img src="http://www.chaoticconcepts.com/bans/rfjustjon8.jpg"><BR><A href="http://www.chaoticconcepts.com">Chaotic Concepts</a>

[Hawiian shirt craig]

See, the real problem is your latent homosexuality


jon, you know how they say if you belive in something enough, and want it, then it will happen? well this time you're wrong.

AND i read O b/c the cover of AARP was about spicing up ur sex life after 50. I made the right choice.

-Hawiian Shirt Craig
THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T
HAVE NICE THINGS!!

<img src=http://www.richstillwell.com/HSC.gif>

anal on the boss' couch since 1982....

[furie]

FUCK YOU OPRAH!!!!!


...And thus, the time bomb explodes. See?

<img src="http://tseery.homestead.com/files/maredsous.jpg" width=300 height=100>
<marquee>"Fire can be our servant, whether it's toasting smores or raining down on Charlie." Seymour Skinner </marquee>