MY ONE PRE-SOFTBALL TAKING A CRAP POST

[Johnny Fontane]

It occurred to me that many of you may want to take steps to ensure that you don't have to take a crap at the softball game tomorrow.

Therefore, you may seriously wish to consider crapping BEFORE you leave home. Chances are if you crap before you leave home, you won't have to crap at the game.

Also, pay attention to what you eat for breakfast. Remember, if you eat a huge greasy breakfast, chances are you will have to take a crap by mid-day.

Also, when you crap before leaving home, please make sure to carefully wipe your ass. If you don't wipe properly, your ass may be itching for the entire day. People, I urge you, wipe at least three times. Also, it might be a good idea to wash your ass in the shower (just in case), but please DO NOT shove the entire bar of soap up your asshole, as this may injure your rectum.

Also, there will be NO PUBLIC MASTURBATION at the game. Please, if you need to masturbate, do so BEFORE you leave home (and be sure to clean up afterwords). You may wish to use some Kleenex. In the alternative, if you anticipate a huge load, you may wish to use Bounty towels (they are highly absorbant).

People, please, let's work together to make this a fun outing for everyone.

"Never tell anybody outside the family what you're thinking again."


Don Corleone to Sonny

This message was edited by Johnny Fontane on 6-27-03 @ 10:45 PM

[Heavy]

Dont you people never say he never helped you out.

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
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[jocefus]

very good thread...ill be dropping a deuce in a few min... just thought u would like to know

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This message was edited by jocefus on 6-28-03 @ 8:58 AM

[ToddEVF]

Also, there will be NO PUBLIC MASTURBATION at the game. Please, if you need to masturbate, do so BEFORE you leave home (and be sure to clean up afterwords). You may wish to use some Kleenex. In the alternative, if you anticipate a huge load, you may wish to use Bounty towels (they are highly absorbant).


wow, wheer was this thread last year? It ciould have cleared up a lot of shiznit. Thank god i'm not going with the "rules" set in this post

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[SatCam]

I never thought that such a CRAPPY thread would be so helpful!! A gegege!

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[DJEvelEd]

People, I urge you, wipe at least three times

And please, for God's sake, alternate the direction of the wipe. Back to front, front to back, back to front, maybe even sideways or circular. Baby Wipes also are a good idea (especially for diarrea)
Women should always wipe front to back for obvoius reasons,,,

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[DJEvelEd]

but please DO NOT shove the entire bar of soap up your asshole, as this may injure your rectum.


Amen to that, there are too many people on this board with foamy rectums. Be careful out there people!!!

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[Christy]

Dont you people never say he never helped you out.

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
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Mamma Mia ... 3 negatives!

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