Favorite Saturday Nite Live Commercial??

[Mike Teacher]

Anyway, what's your favorite SNL commercial?

I still crack up every time I think of the one for a product called simply:

'Ass Don't Smell'

Any description does the above three words injustice, ya hadda see it.

Next?

And don't go for the Bass-O-Matic so soon...think!!!

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[Melrapuo]

"Oops I Crapped My Pants"

<img src="http://www.hometown.aol.com/falsadvirtizment/images/thething.jpg">

"I feel like I'm Han Solo, and you're Chewie, and she's Ben Kenobi, and we're in that fucked-up bar."

Ah...the greatness of Jay & Silent Bob

[McNabbShouldDie]

If SNL commercials are what I think they are, my favorite by far is 'Oops! i crapped my pants!" Instead of writing a desciption of it on my own, i found the transcipt of it cause im cool like that. enjoy:

Open - porch of nice home, looking out on yard.

[Two grandparents sit with grandchild, as parents approach in tennis uniforms]

Ana: Hey, Mom what do you say to a game of tennis?

Grandchild: Come on grandma, with you on our side, the boys don't stand a chance!

Grandma: Okay, I'll get my racket

[Grandma rises from site but changes her mind, looking concerned]

Grandma: On second thought, I think I better sit this one out.

[Grandma upset, looks up at Grandpa]

Grandpa: You kids go ahead, I wanna have a talk with your old grandma.

[kids, parent leave; Grandpa sits down]

Grandpa: You're still having control problems, aren't you?

Grandma: I just don't feel confident, Harvey.

Grandpa: Come with me. I wanna let you in on a little secret.

[Grandpa takes Grandma's hand and they leave porch]

[Grandpa opens cabinet and takes out adult diapers]

Grandpa: Here we are. Oops! I Crapped My Pants.

Grandma: Oops! I Crapped My Pants. I've heard of those. Do they work?

Grandpa: Oops! I Crapped My Pants outperformed every bladder and bowel control product on the market today. Here, I'll show you.

[Grandma holds open diaper, Grandpa holds pitcher]

Grandpa: Imagine this pitcher of tea is really a gallon of your feces.

[Grandpa pours pitcher of tea with lemons into diaper]

Grandpa: See how its super thick protection allows for maximum absorbency without leaking.

Grandma: I'm impressed. Oops! I Crapped My Pants can hold a lot of dung.

Grandpa: And get this - Oops! I Crapped My Pants are biodegradable. Now that's good for the environment.

Grandma: Hey, how do you know so much about Oops! I Crapped My Pants?

Grandpa: Well I'm wearing them.. and I just did.

[Grandpa and Grandma smile at each other]

[tennis courts, Grandpa and Grandma playing tennis with children]

Grandchild: Nice point, Grandma!

[Grandma turns to address camera]

Grandma: Thanks, Oops! I Crapped My Pants!

Voice-over: Visit your local pharmacy and just say, "Oops! I Crapped My Pants.

[Grandpa hugs Grandma, kisses her on the head. They walk away happy]

[They turn to walk away and their tennis shorts are bulging...]

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Good morning heartache, your like an old friend, come and see me again. - Rancid</center>

[monsterone]

i wish i could remember the name, but one of the lines was,

"...i didn't have a condom, but i figured, hey, when's the next time i'll be in haiti?"

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<marquee behavior=alternate scrolldelay=30> being white is like playing for the yankees </Marquee>

[The Chairman]

Colon Blow.

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I assassin down the avenue.
The Minneapolis Police are apparently following me though....
The Chairman uses Vic Firth sticks and skidmark sigs.
2%

[FUNKMAN]

one of my favorites is a golden oldie...

it was an advertisement for these "ethnic correct" voice recorder boxes that you would send to a funeral home in case you couldn't make it...

you would hear somebody yelling out something or crying hystericaly and when everyone turned around it was one of these boxes sitting on a chair...

the italian one had an old italian woman - "why?, why Johnny?

the black one - "i'm gonna get that cop that killed my brother"

there were probably others but i can't remember them all...

<img src="http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/funkman.gif">

sig by ADF...

[Death Metal Moe]

I love all these commercials you're mentioning, but I REALLY loved those fake products that sponsored us "Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer" like Big Bean.

Why eat a bunch of small beans when you can eat one Big Bean?

And Dog Assassin. When you can't bare to put him to sleep, it's time to call Dog Assassin.

Or remember Spider Whistle. Why you blow it spiders come runnin'!

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[Death Metal Moe]

Remember Nerf Crotch Bat?

I don't know all the lyrics, but I remember "Nerf plus Crotch equals lots of fun!"

And Then they talked about Nerf Crotch Rocket and Nerf Nerf (not for use with crotch)

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[Death Metal Moe]

What about that kit for kids that turns used kitty litter into fun toys, and a whistle.

I love how when their toys start to fall apart, they slide a HUGE bowl of food in front of their cat.

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[Death Metal Moe]

I know it was a longer skit, but "The Herlihey Boy" one was a commercial for a kid to house sit for you.

It was one of the best skits that Farley went apeshit insane in.

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[Death Metal Moe]

I also remember Gatorade Cookie Dough. It was just plastic bottles full of dough, and they'd drink in all sweaty and pour it over themselves to cool off.

And what was that crazy deoderant with some hormone in it that made the people who use it like hulk out and start kicking ass? All I remember is Tim Meadows with a huge caveman brow ridge, Chris Kattan running around and Will Ferral marking his territory like a cat.

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[Melrapuo]

Gatorade Cookie Dough

Cookie Dough Sport. That commercial was great.

I liked the one for Crystal Gravy too. They were dunkin' that crap in everything.

<img src="http://www.hometown.aol.com/falsadvirtizment/images/thething.jpg">

"I feel like I'm Han Solo, and you're Chewie, and she's Ben Kenobi, and we're in that fucked-up bar."

Ah...the greatness of Jay & Silent Bob

[Melrapuo]

And who can forget the Xerox Assjet 790?

<img src="http://www.hometown.aol.com/falsadvirtizment/images/thething.jpg">

"I feel like I'm Han Solo, and you're Chewie, and she's Ben Kenobi, and we're in that fucked-up bar."

Ah...the greatness of Jay & Silent Bob

[Fallon]

Crystal Gravy, Oops I Crapped My Pants, Little Chocolate Donuts and the gay beer commercial with Chris Farley and Adam Sandler.

<center>
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"He'll probably buy the whole league, but not my desire and my heart. He doesn't have the money to buy fear and put it in my heart." <b>-Pedro Martinez on George Steinbrenner</b>
</center>

[Lisa Croft]

Disposable toilets... use it once, rip it off the hinges. Only takes three hours to reinstall... so easy!

Dog Chow! Arf Arf! Dog Chow! Arf Arf! (rat poison!)

Then there was the one that was selling life-like serial killer statues to put in your window, to scare away actual burglars. When you pull the string, they say "I'm gonna put my evil inside you."

<img src="http://members.aol.com/fezwhatleyfan/lisasig">

[SuperClerk]

What about the sneaker grill? I forgot the name of it.

<IMG SRC="http://home.comcast.net/~wwfallon/RFnetSuperClerk.jpg">

It's always fun until someone gets hurt.....and then it's just hilarious.

Fallon Rules!

[A.J.]

The Royal Mark II (I believe): the car with the ride so smooth, a rabbi performed a circumcision in the back seat.

Stevie Wonder's Canon Camera commercial.

Canis: a take off on those arty perfume commercials where the guy makes out with the dog.

http://www-personal.engin.umich.edu/~jpriskor/91aschmitts.jpg

http://www-personal.engin.umich.edu/~jpriskor/gay.jpg

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A Skidmark production.

Red Sox Nation

This message was edited by AJinDC on 8-1-03 @ 12:55 PM

[TheMojoPin]

SCHMIDT'S GAY!!!

Farley's a little TOO good in that one.

I can never get enough of the "Happy Fun Ball" commercial...

"Do not taunt 'Happy Fun Ball'."

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2% << December boys got it BAD >> "You might tell some lies about the good times we've had/But I've kissed your mother twice...and now I'm working on your dad..."

[KCfromDC]

For the older crowd, from the Jane Curtain era:

Quarry, the breakfast cereal made from rocks.

Classic.

[TheMojoPin]

Bill Murray had a great one...

"'Swill'. The only mineral water dredged from the goodness of Lake Erie."

And Belushi playing Belushi, endorsing "Little Chocolate Donuts" as his Olympic breakfast food of choice. Watching that fat bastard in tights, pole-vaulting, while smoking a cigarette, is pure comedy GOLD, Jerry!

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2% << December boys got it BAD >> "You might tell some lies about the good times we've had/But I've kissed your mother twice...and now I'm working on your dad..."

[grlNIN]

Whats the one for the Gatorade that all the sports players are drinking and it makes their animal instincts coem out.

Ferrel starts pissing on something and theyre attacking people.


that one was hysterical.


And what was that crazy deoderant with some hormone in it that made the people who use it like hulk out and start kicking ass? All I remember is Tim Meadows with a huge caveman brow ridge, Chris Kattan running around and Will Ferral marking his territory like a cat.

i guess i didnt read this thread hard enough. I thought it was a form of gatorade though.
<center>
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</center><center><font size=1>Speak in tongues, speak in lies
Drooling livers, born to die
It's a wonder that those guns don't point at you</b></font><font color=blue><marquee behavior=advertant>110% Shenannigans</font></marquee></center>

This message was edited by grlNIN on 8-1-03 @ 2:34 PM

[furie]

The Bathroom Monkey and Super Happy Fun Ball

<img src="http://tseery.homestead.com/files/mp3heads.jpg">

[TheMojoPin]

The Bathroom Monkey

"I don't know where monkeys come from, I don't know what they eat..."

Hey, lookit that. Something funny by Garafalo.

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2% << December boys got it BAD >> "You might tell some lies about the good times we've had/But I've kissed your mother twice...and now I'm working on your dad..."

[dotsncoms]

Homocil is the best! it's a drug for parental anxiety disorder. The dad looks like he's depressed but he is actually flipping out because his 10 year old son is gay.The kid twirls battons, makes sequined dresses, bakes cream brulee and performs as a male cheerleader.

<center><img src="http://msnusers.com/ronfez/documents/furballs/sigpic.jpg" height=100 width=100></center>I'm gunna turn it up a notch <center><img src="http://img.ranchoweb.com/images/aggie2323/badassbuddy_com-fishing.gif" height=50 width=50></center>

This message was edited by dotsncoms on 8-1-03 @ 4:20 PM

[ChickenHawk]

I can't pick one, but here's my top 5 in NO particular order:

Uncle Jemima's Mash Liquor
Ass Jet 790
Bioflex
Homocil
Bathroom Monkey

<IMG SRC="http://homepage.mac.com/papahawk/.Pictures/chickenhawk3.gif">
(fluffernutter draws good birds.)

This message was edited by ChickenHawk on 8-1-03 @ 4:53 PM

[ChickenHawk]

What about that kit for kids that turns used kitty litter into fun toys, and a whistle.
Litter Critters.

<IMG SRC="http://homepage.mac.com/papahawk/.Pictures/chickenhawk3.gif">
(fluffernutter draws good birds.)

[Melrapuo]

wow, i completely forgot about uncle jemima's mash liquor

"That means you get f*cked up for less money"

"What you swattin' at?"

<img src="http://www.hometown.aol.com/falsadvirtizment/images/thething.jpg">

"I feel like I'm Han Solo, and you're Chewie, and she's Ben Kenobi, and we're in that fucked-up bar."

Ah...the greatness of Jay & Silent Bob

[bunnyluvsthem]

No one will remember this, and I am giving away my age here. But I was probably about 10 at the time. In fact, no one will probably remember the "original" that the parody was based on.

Cut to commercial.

A man, jogging through a park. Passing a woman with a baby stroller. Pan out. Passing some body of water. Trees. Foilage. Birds chirping. Sun. Shade. More shade. Still jogging. Approaches a bridge, from a path that runs underneath it. Pan in. Jogging underneath the bridge. Jogging into the bridge. Getting darker.

Sllllorch. Threatening music. Stops mid-jog. Close-up on foot, in a futile attempt to stretch free of a glue-like substance. Close up on jogger's horror-stricken face, as he views remnants of human bones and a skull or two in his proximity.

Cut to shot of small retail-packaged box, with logo. Voice-over: Jogger Motel. Joggers jog in, but they don't jog out.

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Shut out, but not shut Up.
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[furie]

I also liked Big Red and the Yard-a-pult.

<img src="http://tseery.homestead.com/files/mp3heads.jpg">

[ozzie]

The "Adobe Car"

"Calvin Kline, Compulsion" (ooh, the price of it!)

Oh, and the Bank ad... the one that JUST made change.

"We're here to meet your needs. If you come in with a hundred dollar bill, we're not going to give you 2000 nickles"

:Black Screen: We're not going to give you two thousand nickles

"Unless of course, that's what you request"

"How do we make a profit? Simple. Volume!"

i wish i could remember the name, but one of the lines was,

"...i didn't have a condom, but i figured, hey, when's the next time i'll be in haiti?"

I think that was for "Bad Idea... Jeans?" Maybe?

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Mucho appreciation for the sigpic CZM!
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[TheMojoPin]

Oh, yeah! I love the one for "KFC'S Shredders!"

"Ice-cool lettuce and tangy mayonaise!"

"The grease stains tell you it's GOOOOOD!!!"

"I'm a BIG man and I need a BIG Shredder!"

Fallon sounds JUST like one of those hyperactive, fake-cool, "X-treme" kids in all commercials that are supposed to cater to "da youth."

My vote for the worst?

"Levi's Three-Legged Jeans".

And like the whole cast was in it, too.

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2% << December boys got it BAD >> "You might tell some lies about the good times we've had/But I've kissed your mother twice...and now I'm working on your dad..."

[TheMojoPin]

"I'll KILL the dirty Jap bastard what shot down my TRIPLE POST!!!"

<img src=http://www.artonweb.com/fineartists/seckere/belushi.gif>

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2% << December boys got it BAD >> "You might tell some lies about the good times we've had/But I've kissed your mother twice...and now I'm working on your dad..."

This message was edited by TheMojoPin on 8-2-03 @ 12:44 AM

[TheMojoPin]

"Mojo sucks at the internet."

<img src=http://www.freep.com/jobspage/artwork/divide.jpg>

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2% << December boys got it BAD >> "You might tell some lies about the good times we've had/But I've kissed your mother twice...and now I'm working on your dad..."

This message was edited by TheMojoPin on 8-2-03 @ 12:47 AM

[Shecky]

My vote for the worst? Levi's Three legged jeans


A leg, a leg and a leg

Later,
SHECKY

[Death Metal Moe]

Did they even try to make whitty commercials during that HORRIBLE period of SNL with people like Julia Lewie Dryfus and that blonde guy that sucked? Comedy Central doesn't even play the reruns anymore, thankfully!



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