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GaryWyze
08-12-2003, 09:53 AM
[color=purple]The date was July 26th, 2003, and the band was at an all time high. After two years together, and several failed monickers, they finally had a name that worked.

Thanks to a plug in that day's N.Y. Post, the Venue, Karavas Place, was filled to capacity. Several well known radio personalities were in attendance, as well as a few budding stars on the stand-up comedy circuit. The buzz was great, and electricity fulled the air.

Without a doubt, the stage was set for stardom... but what should've been the launching pad to fame and fortune, quickly went the way of the Space Shuttle Challenger.

My name is Gary Wyze, and you're watching CRANKCASE: Behind The Music.

Before even playing their 1st chord that night, things started to unravel. After a disappointing turn at warming up the audience with his comedy routine, band keyboardist Lourden was openly ridiculed by drummer and frontman Mikey D.

*Cut to Lourden*

Lourden: "Those words still echo in my head, <i>'trust me folks, he's better on the keyboards than he is at comedy.'</i> I still can't believe he did that to me. Who knew Mikey had such a mean streak to him?"

Embarrassed publicly, and feeling his reputation as a comic had been irreversibly damaged, Lourden felt he had no other choice but to quit the band.

But if he thought that doing so would spare him further from the wrath of Mikey D, he was sadly mistaken.

*cut to an audio clip from the Ron & Fez show, the week of August 1st*

Ron Bennington: "So, Mikey, I hear there was some turmoil after the Karavas show?"

Mikey D. "Yeah, Lourden quit the band, but it's okay. He never showed up for rehearsal anyway."

*cut to a misty eyed Lourden*

Lourden: "I didn't deserve to be treated that way. Nobody does. *fighting back tears* I'm sorry, I need to take a moment."

Indeed, a moment was all it took for Mikey D to begin what would be the end of CRANKCASE. When we return, a certain Englishman learns what it's like to be on the other side of the camera. And later, Poison's Brett Michael goes from hair-band legend to homosexual home-wrecker. All on CRANKCASE: Behind The Music.

(to be continued)

<marquee><b>Here's what some of the critics are saying about GaryWyze... Ron Bennington, one 1/2 of the radio duo Ron & Fez, <u>"Gary Wyze is a funny, funny comedian"</u> ... IrishAlkey, one 1/2 of the drunken sex duo, Alkey & Silera: <u>"Gary = God"</u> ... Rory Hampton, former radio producer and well know Aryan: <u>"GaryWyze IS the Godfather!"</u> ... Chairman Kaga, Chairman of the RF.NET Message Board: <u>"Gary is hysterical, absolutely hilarious, he truly is The Don</u> ... Winnie Copper, best female vocalist of the entire RF.NET Message Board: <u>Gary is a total genius, call me a Garyite, I am converting to Garyism."</u></b></marquee>

<center>http://czm.racknine.net/images/krustysig.jpg

Much thanks to CZM for the killer

This message was edited by GaryWyze on 8-12-03 @ 2:14 PM

JerseyRich
08-12-2003, 12:30 PM
You forgot Mikey's dance with the booze...and the ultimate destruction of our guitar player's guitar.

My section would go like this:

"I was born a poor, black boy."





<img src=http://www.richstillwell.com/RfSig.jpg>

Snoogans
08-12-2003, 12:34 PM
http://www.geekspeakweekly.com/images/saint_walken.gif

after this, you'll all be wearing gold plated diapers....


NEVER QUESTION BRUCE DICKENSON

http://wnewsgirl.homestead.com/files/Snoogans.jpg
Silent Bob you one rude motherfucker, she like to go down on you, suck you. line up 2 other guys and make like a circus seal


eww you fuckin faggots, i hate guys, i LOOOOVE WOMEN!

fiestygal
08-12-2003, 01:43 PM
This thread is pretty fucking funny... great job gary!

I'M RICH BIA-OTCH!

<IMG SRC="http://tenbatsuzen.homestead.com/files/fiestysig1.jpg">
THANX TENB

Gvac
08-12-2003, 01:59 PM
I can't wait for the part about my long descent into caffeine and nicotine addiction.

<img src=http://ltrooster.homestead.com/files/gvacamerica.jpg>

PanterA
08-12-2003, 02:43 PM
Dont forget the kicking incident. Now that's controversy.

<center><img border=2 src="http://members.aol.com/rnfpantera/rfsig4"></center><font color=white>

DC Reed
08-12-2003, 04:58 PM
And What about GVac's ultra bitch girlfriend Yoko Ono, she's not mentioned yet!

<IMG SRC="http://dcreed.freeservers.com/images/dcrampage.gif">

<marquee behavoir

StupidGirlllll
08-12-2003, 05:24 PM
Wasn't there also an incident with Cybor Soldir?

http://members.aol.com/thetoddsterlsp/images/stupidgirlllll4.gif
Thank U Toddy Bear

Friday
08-12-2003, 05:28 PM
wow....i feel so clueless.

eh. my job is to look pretty and rock out on command.

I leave the drama to the boyees. :p

<img src=http://www.richstillwell.com/FridaySig1.gif>

Thanks to Jersey Rich for this Classay sig!

SatCam
08-13-2003, 01:12 AM
Wasn't there also an incident with Cybor Soldir?

In front of the stage, another trama was unfolding. It was that of RonFez.net's only soldier, CyberSoldier, who was molesting girls and getting his ass kicked by their boyfriends.

<IMG SRC="http://members.aol.com/satelitecam/images/sig53_general_bobbarker.jpg" align=right><A HREF=http://www.satelitecam.tk>Ron and Fez Dr0ps and Bits</A>
<a href=http://www.oldronandfezpages.tk>WNEW Ron and Fez Pages</a>


Thanks for the Sigpic, SatCam, you're the best!
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