Old Fart Roll-Call

[Hottub]

I am one, and I can, off the top of my head, name about 10 more.

Now is the time to "Stand up and be counted"
Don't be shy. Share your wisdom...




Hello, my name is Hottub and I am getting old.

I know that is both bogus and sad, but:
I still know how to party...



http://siebert.home.att.net/bighomer.gif

"Ahh, Beer. The cause of, and answer to all of life's problems"

[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

My name is fuzzybutt. I'm 36.

I still rock 'n roll all nite and party everyday.

But I need a nap and some coffee.

<IMG SRC="http://atamichimpo.50megs.com/images/alicegenesig.jpg">

[keithy_19]

I'm keithbobeefy...and I'm 15 and would like to say, "haha! you guys are closer to death then me!" ZING!!!

http://members.aol.com/thetoddsterlsp/sigpics/keithbobeefy1.gif


For who? For her? For what? Frrrrrget about it!

[Tall_James]

I'm keithbobeefy...and I'm 15 and would like to say, "haha! you guys are closer to death then me!" ZING!!!

Not if I find out where you live.

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/evil.jpg>
In my opinion, there's nothing in this world beats a '52 Vincent and a red headed girl.

[Johnny Fontane]

Johnny Fontane checkin' in at the ripe old age of 37...

HOOWA!!!

nice...

I wouldn't mind banging an old bag; you know the type I mean, the Mrs. Robinson type. She doesn't have to be that hot, just the slutty mature type - I could get into that.

http://www.tiramillas.net/cine/oceanseleven/rat.jpg

"I'm for anything that gets you through the night, be it prayer, tranquilizers, or a bottle of Jack Daniel's." - Frank Sinatra

"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on." - Dean Martin

"The day they stop making fun of you is the day they don't give a damn about you." - Sammy Davis Jr.

[Tall_James]

I'm 39. Making me the oldest man ever to hold the RFW World Championship Belt.

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/evil.jpg>
In my opinion, there's nothing in this world beats a '52 Vincent and a red headed girl.

[FUNKMAN]

i'll be hitting 41 and i'm tons of fun...

okay i'm just tons...

<img src="http://www.grandfunkrailroad.com/images/lives100.gif">

[Hottub]

Not if I find out where you live


With Jame's help, there is nothing that can stop us from finding you....


(except for a non-accesable wheeelchair ramp) :eg:

http://siebert.home.att.net/bighomer.gif

"Ahh, Beer. The cause of, and answer to all of life's problems"

[hyperspace]

hi i'm Hyperspace i'm 33 still have all my hair, smooth silky skin covered with body hair and i still masterbate 3-5 times per day i also have nice "B" cup manboobs which are hairy as well.

[TheMojoPin]

I is 24 and I is spectacular.

<img src="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=TheMojoPin">
2% << December boys got it BAD >> "You might tell some lies about the good times we've had/But I've kissed your mother twice...and now I'm working on your dad..."

[sr71blackbird]

My name is sr71blackbird, and Im 38.
My pet peeves are aquaculture, autoerotic asphixiation & proper urinal etiquet. I have a extensive collection of sea shells, that I keep scattered on the beaches all over the world. Im bald, and yet I have hair. Oh, and Im a Pisces.


http://members.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/sr71-sig.gif

Many Thanks Soup!

[mikeyboy]

I'm mikeyboy. I'm 35 and I hate all the music you young kids listen to.


<IMG SRC="http://www.angelfire.com/film/mikeyboy/sig15.jpg">
I'm hiding out in the big city blinking
Subscriber to Dignan's 40 year plan
2%

[mothershucker]

Three months till 40, up untill this year I still thought of myself a youngster, but the pains are starting to add up.

Like Indiana Jones said "it's not the years, it's the miliage........"

I shucked it, and I shucked it, and I shucked it, i'm quite the mother shucker

[Heavy]

I'm getting old.

<img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=JohneeWadd">
<marquee>A proportionate amount of props are equally distributed to my nigga's Fluff, Alexxis, CanOfSoup15, WWFallon and Katylina</marquee>

[SuperClerk]

I'm 28 years old of twisted steel and sex appeal. The tower of power, the man of the hour, too sweet to be sour.

<IMG SRC="http://home.comcast.net/~wwfallon/RFnetSuperClerk.jpg">

It's a pack of dogs.....It's whatever you want it to be.

Fallon Rules!

[reeshy]

None of your fucking business!!! Now leave me alone while I wait for the mailman to deliver my new issue of AARP!!!!

<IMG SRC=http://www.hollywoodusa.co.uk/images/charles-manson.jpg>

[Death Metal Moe]

You're only as old as you feel!

Hello, I'm Death Metal Moe. I'm 25 going on 70.

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=njdmmoe">
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
Killing me is not enough to make me go away....

[spoon]

My name is sr71blackbird, and Im 38. My pet peeves are aquaculture, autoerotic asphixiation & proper urinal etiquet. I have a extensive collection of sea shells, that I keep scattered on the beaches all over the world. Im bald, and yet I have hair. Oh, and Im a Pisces.
Ladies and gentlemen, let's all welcome Mr. Steven Wright to the room! Give it up!

*I'm not afraid of heights, I'm afraid of widths. I want to skate on the other side of the ice.

<img src="http://members.aol.com/dxixrxt/spoon2.jpg">
And you may not like it! But you will learn to love it!

This message was edited by spoon on 8-28-03 @ 4:29 AM

[golfcourseguy]

No tattoos
No piercings
No STDs
I'm ancient

" editing posts since day one"

[DJEvelEd]

Big Ass Age 35 checkin in.

<IMG SRC="http://members.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/dj-sig.gif">
May your Kum Krusted Kocks be Konstantly Kovered in Kunt.

[East Side Dave]

I'm 25 but sometimes I pretend that I'm a 26 year-old...midget!

<img src=http://www.richstillwell.com/ESD.gif>
Big Ass Mafia

[Furtherman]

I'm 29 but sometime I forget. Seriously. Age is irrelevant.

[A.J.]

33 checking in. I'm as old as Jesus, John Belushi, and Chris Farley!

<IMG SRC="http://www.silentspic.com/images/sighost/ajdcsig.jpg">
A Skidmark production.

Red Sox Nation

[Mike Teacher]

Fuck Me I'm Forty

:)

http://www.miketheteacher.com

<IMG SRC="http://members.aol.com/miketeachr/MikeTheT">

[Bill From Yorktown]

turning 37 in 29 days.

<IMG SRC="http://hometown.aol.com/billb914/sigpic.gif">

[mikeyboy]

I is 24 and I is spectacular.


I don't care where your baseball landed, GET THE HELL OFF MY LAWN!

<IMG SRC="http://www.angelfire.com/film/mikeyboy/sig15.jpg">
I'm hiding out in the big city blinking
Subscriber to Dignan's 40 year plan
2%

[Jennitalia]

I'm 30 and I'm reaching my sexual peak. Now I just need somebody to fuck

<IMG SRC="http://www.chaoticconcepts.com/bans/jn5.gif">

[Heavy]

I care about your wants and needs.

<img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=JohneeWadd">
<marquee>A proportionate amount of props are equally distributed to my nigga's Fluff, Alexxis, CanOfSoup15, WWFallon and Katylina</marquee>

[ozzie]

35 and already married and divorced twice. I stink.

<IMG SRC="http://czm.racknine.net/images/sigcity/thumbnails/tnsigozzie.jpg">
Mucho appreciation for the sigpic CZM!
<marquee bgcolor="navy" width="20%"><font color="orange">AUBURN</marquee><marquee bgcolor="orange" width="20%" direction="right"><font color="navy">TIGERS</marquee></font><marquee bgcolor="navy" width="20%"><font color="orange">AUBURN</marquee><marquee bgcolor="orange" width="20%" direction="right"><font color="navy">TIGERS</font></marquee>

[TheMojoPin]

I don't care where your baseball landed, GET THE HELL OFF MY LAWN!

"Your revolution is OVER, old man!"

<img src="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=TheMojoPin">
2% << December boys got it BAD >> "You might tell some lies about the good times we've had/But I've kissed your mother twice...and now I'm working on your dad..."

[Tall_James]

I'm 30 and I'm reaching my sexual peak. Now I just need somebody to fuck


These kids today with their rap music, belly shirts and their sexual peaks....OY!

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/evil.jpg>
In my opinion, there's nothing in this world beats a '52 Vincent and a red headed girl.

[guttersnipe]

My birth certifcate claims I am 38. But I don't feel 38. Don't think I even look 38. I see other 38 year olds and think, damn, I can't possibly be that old.

The crystal in my hand has been red for eight years and I'm still running. And if you get that reference, you're an old fart like me.

~snipe



<IMG SRC="http://www.charm.net/~imp/me/alexdelarge.jpg">

[Tall_James]

The crystal in my hand has been red for eight years and I'm still running. And if you get that reference, you're an old fart like me


"CAROUSEL ! CAROUSEL ! CAROUSEL !" We have a runner in sector 4....

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/evil.jpg>
In my opinion, there's nothing in this world beats a '52 Vincent and a red headed girl.

This message was edited by Tall_James on 8-28-03 @ 1:22 PM

[blancostupido]

yep....38 here

Old Fart At Play

Pappy with the Khaki sweatband
Bowed goat potbellied barnyard that only he noticed
The old fart was smart
The old gold cloth madonna
Dancin' t' the fiddle 'n saw
He ran down behind the knoll
'n slipped on his wooden fishhead
The mouth worked 'n snapped all the bees
Back t' the bungalow

Momma was flatten'n lard
With her red enamel rollin' pin
When the fishhead broke the window
Rubber eye erect 'n precisely detailed
Airholes from which breath should come
Is now closely fit
With the chatter of the old fart inside

An assortment of observations took place
Momma licked 'er lips like uh cat
Pecked the ground like uh rooster
Pivoted like uh duck
Her stockings down caught dust 'n doughballs
She cracked 'er mouth glaze caught one eyelash
Rubbed 'er hands on 'er gorgeous gingham
Her hand grasped sticky metal intricate latchwork
Open t' the room uh smell cold mixed with bologna
Rubber bands crumpled wax paper bonnets
Fat goose legs 'n special jellies
Ignited by the warmth of the room
The old fart smelled this thru his important breather holes
Cleverly he dialed from within from the outside we observed
That the nose of the wooden mask
Where the holes had just been uh moment ago
Was now smooth amazingly blended camouflaged in
With the very intricate rainbow trout replica

The old fart inside was now breathin' freely
From his perfume bottle atomizer air bulb invention

His excited eyes from within the dark interior glazed;
watered in appreciation of his thoughtful preparation.

[StupidGirlllll]

Just turned 31, but do not look a day over 23

http://members.aol.com/thetoddsterlsp/images/stupidgirlllll4.gif
Thank U Toddy Bear

[jafter]

I'm mikeyboy. I'm 35 and I hate all the music you young kids listen to.


Here here, I totally agree with that statement I stopped buying new stuff years ago. I think the last new artist I bought was Fiona Apple.

I am 37 going on 38 and I am starting to get a touch of grey on the temples. I am starting to look like Paulie Walnuts.

<img src=http://www.richstillwell.com/Jafter.jpg>

[Recyclerz]

Stand up and be counted


Eh, I'll just sit here thank you very much.

Forty-fucking-two.

You'd think I would have accumulated some wisdom by now.


You'd be wrong.


http://www.renewablechoice.com/media/old-man.jpg

There ain't no asylum here.
King Solomon, he never lived 'round here.

[jocefus]

here ya go funk..this is for you....dont say i never gave u anything :)

http://tekennelly.tzo.com:3501/Hapkido.web/cane.jpg

http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=jocefus


Big ups to amy,aggie, and sat cam for the sigs..

hey my man, what it look like

[FUNKMAN]

here ya go Jocefus... i know coaching first is the most labor-intensive activity in the world...
;)

http://www.usmarkerboard.com/img261.jpg

<img src="http://www.grandfunkrailroad.com/images/lives100.gif">

[high fly]

I am between 30 and death, that's all you'll get out of me.




I like that better than saying "of a certain age".



" and they ask me why I drink"

[scorpion]

I am 41.

NO jokes! Just remember I know where you live.

But I'll probably forget why in am there.

So just give me some milk and cookies and please send me home according to where my name tag says I live. ;p

<img src="http://www.healthytraining.com/rf/kittycar.jpg">

Now I'm starvin


This message was edited by scorpion on 8-28-03 @ 3:53 PM

[scorpion]

I'm 30 and I'm reaching my sexual peak. Now I just need somebody to fuck


Is there an age limit to apply?

<img src="http://www.healthytraining.com/rf/kittycar.jpg">

Now I'm starvin

[high fly]

clue: I still have a coupla Hang Ten t-shirts.

" and they ask me why I drink"

[yarpwizard]

Yarpwizard here buddays, I'm older than dirt ( half a century) but act like a 10 year old. I have the great honor of being born the same day as Fez...March 31.

<img src=http://yarpwizard.50megs.com/images/ronfez3.gif>

A mind is a terrible thing to dyworf.

[AppleBoy]

37 years on the planet and all I got was this lousy t-shirt

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/cup03.jpg">

[Hottub]

WOW!
I would like to stand up, and applaud you all..

But I cant. This dern lumbago and all...

We will see how old I "feel" at snoog's softball game.



http://siebert.home.att.net/bighomer.gif

"Ahh, Beer. The cause of, and answer to all of life's problems"

[more cowbells]

Hello Everyone!

My name is MORE COWBELLS and I am 36 years old.

But you know what??

Smoking weed and drinking Sam Adams every day keeps me looking young...that's MY secret.

<img src="http://members.aol.com/rfbobbypantera/morecowbell"><br>Bring back RON & FEZ to N.Y.C.!

[Ralphy Ramone]

An "Old Fart" movie trivia question for Mrs. Snipe and T_J........"Soylent Green is........"

<img src=http://publish.hometown.aol.com/turkishtaffy1/myhomepage/licplate.jpg?mtbrand=AOL_US>

It's T.V.'s fault I am this way

[reeshy]

PEOPLE!!!!!

http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:AgRDpLRzzMgC:www.emotioneric.com/soylentgreen.jpg

<IMG SRC=http://www.rap.ucar.edu/staff/tardif/perso/tom_waits.jpg>

[guttersnipe]

"Soylent Green is........"

made from people!"

I had the coolest parents. They would sometimes surprise me by coming to school and telling them I had a dentist appointment or something, and then spirit me away to see a matinee of a great movie. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, Cabaret, and Soylent Green, just to name a few.

I could barely eat for a week after seeing that one.

So, what do I win?

~snipe



<IMG SRC="http://www.charm.net/~imp/me/alexdelarge.jpg">

[guttersnipe]

damn you, reeshy.



<IMG SRC="http://www.charm.net/~imp/me/alexdelarge.jpg">

[reeshy]

damn you, reeshy.


What I do now????? Oh man, I'm always in trouble!!!!!!!!!!!

<IMG SRC=http://www.rap.ucar.edu/staff/tardif/perso/tom_waits.jpg>

[Ralphy Ramone]

So, what do I win?


A matching eye lash for your left eye and an engraved plaque on the wall of the "Old Fart Hall of Fame".

The baby's arm holding an apple has already been awarded....."sorry....so sorry!"

<img src=http://publish.hometown.aol.com/turkishtaffy1/myhomepage/licplate.jpg?mtbrand=AOL_US>

It's T.V.'s fault I am this way

[guttersnipe]

Yay. I think I like second prize better. But can I still pull off the old Ultraviolent look with symmetrical eyelashes? Aw, what the hell am I thinking. An Old Fart like me can't pull off any kEwL l00k. Fuckit. I'm handing my bowler and eyelashes down to grlNIN.

~snipe



<IMG SRC="http://www.charm.net/~imp/me/alexdelarge.jpg">

[WRESTLINGFAN]

I just turned 30 and i remember all of WNEW's formats. THIS BLINK SHIT HAS GOT TO GO!!!!!!

[Hottub]

I just turned 30 and i remember all of WNEW's formats. THIS BLINK SHIT HAS GOT TO GO!!!!!!


Hell, I remember when WPLJ was almost as cool as WNEW.
WDHA has always kicked ass!

Except for when WSOU was truly "The Hardest Rock"

Long Live Pirate Radio

Slayer
Danzig
Suicidal Tendencies
Anthrax...

http://siebert.home.att.net/hosig.jpg

"Ahh, Beer. The cause of, and answer to all of life's problems"