Why Don't Humans Have Self-Cleaning Asses?

[ChickenHawk]

I don't understand it. Is this our punishment for being granted Top-Of-The-Food-Chain Status? Why are we the only species in the world that has to wipe our ass? I don't see any dogs wiping their asses, and they smell just fine. Cats don't have to wipe their asses. Neither do lizards. Why do WE get the shit end of the stick... literally.

*SIG PENDING*

This message was edited by ChickenHawk on 8-30-03 @ 2:14 AM

[Death Metal Moe]

Ever see a dog drag it's ass on the carpet?

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[ChickenHawk]

Not unless it had no back legs.

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[PanterA]

Cats and dogs dont lick there asses just because they can.

Only a human would do that.

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[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

As humans, we have to poo and shower and tend to other nasty bodily secretions/functions because God said so.

Apparently, we were born of "original sin" and, therefore, screwed from the get go.

Where's my incentive?


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I always thought that if I held you tightly
You'd always love me like you did back then

[TheMojoPin]

All this from the guy that suppsoedly loves us no matter what?

WHAT AN ASS.

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[Green Lantern]

because we haven't develop the mutant power yet.

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[DJEvelEd]

I read somewhere that some obese women use their pets to lick it clean.












Really, the story had an "A.P."

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This message was edited by DJEvelEd on 8-30-03 @ 8:22 PM

[FUNKMAN]

you can always count on DJEvel to ruin your dinner...
;p

i know what you mean, i mean come on, they put wipers on the backwindows of cars... whatup?

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[samnyc]

Thankfully the summer posting season ends this weekend.

[SatCam]

do animals wear underwear? thought not.

ZING!

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[Mike Teacher]

More importantly, where is 'The Beam' Ron mentions often on the show.

if you didn't hear, once the talk was technology [Fez was celebrating the 100th anniversary of the invention of modern air-conditioning], and Ron said something along the lines of...

...'where's that beam that was supposed to do everything in the future. In every future movie people move around with transporter beams, and in all the sci-fi movies things are always transformed, or examined under, or sterilized, or killed, or brought to life, or cooked, under 'The Beam'. And 'The Beam' to wipe your ass? Where is it?...

And I agree.
It's almost the year 2004.
I want The Beam.

http://www.miketheteacher.com

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[FUNKMAN]

And 'The Beam' to wipe your ass? Where is it?...


not sure Mike but i heard there is a beam you can tie to your ass, something about not falling in?

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"Give me all the love that's in ya and i'm gonna give you mine" "

[Tall_James]

And 'The Beam' to wipe your ass?

"Remember Roland...all things follow the beam."

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