This one goes in the World's Dumbest Criminal file

[Justice4all]

Right now this guy is the laughing stock of the whole jail. Talk about really fucking up.
Anyway...enjoy the story...I know I did!

CLARKSTOWN, New York (AP) -- Mistake No. 1: Impersonating a police officer.

Mistake No. 2: Making a traffic stop.

Mistake No. 3: Stopping an off-duty state trooper.

Shalom Gelbman, 22, of New Square, New York, made all three mistakes, state police said.

Gelbman, with a strobe light on his dashboard and his high beams flashing, pulled a car over Wednesday night on the Palisades Interstate Parkway, police said. Inside the car was state Trooper Seamus Lyons, who arrested Gelbman. It was clear to Lyons that Gelbman wasn't a colleague, authorities said, because of his license plate number and the equipment he had in his car.

Gelbman was charged with reckless endangerment and criminal impersonation, police said, and was cited for having unauthorized equipment in his car, a dark blue Mercury Grand Marquis with tinted windows.

Gelbman was also ticketed for driving without a registration or insurance. He was released on $5,000 bail after being arraigned in Clarkstown Justice Court.



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Bowie, Md.: Berkeley, I'm so glad you're back!; I've really missed The Far Side all these years.

Berkeley Breathed: Yes, thank you, but I don't draw Far Side. I draw Calvin and Hobbes.

[high fly]

Hoo boy!
I just loves the dumb criminal stories!

What can be done to make sure this man doesn't breed?

" and they ask me why I drink"

[SuperClerk]

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Merry Christmas to All!

[mikeyboy]

I may have read it somewhere here, but I think it was actually in last week's "News of the Weird". There have been a number of similar incidents in which people have impersonated police officers. Apparently in a few cases, the perpetrator was caught when he stupidly decided to call for back-up.

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[Bama]

I thought this was going to be another Bush bashing thread.

He's a dumb criminal right?

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YANKEES SUCK

[high fly]

(strains to maintain self control)

" and they ask me why I drink"

[pennington]

Shalom Gelbman


Trooper Seamus Lyons


This sounds like an episode of "The Simpsons".

[sr71blackbird]

Thief tries to steal cop car, with the cop in it.

Thief jumps in driver's seat, while cop #2 (the driver) is inside a deli. Cop #1 is in passenger's seat. Cop and robber start to slug it out in the front seat.

Good Samaritan #1 passes by, tries to help cop #1 by leaning into driver's window and beating on robber who is still in driver's seat. Good Samaritan #2 sees the mess, runs into the deli, and alerts cop #2 -- who runs out, sees Good Samaritan #1 leaning in the window, thinks that he's the perpetrator, and starts to beat on him.


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[Snoogans]

this is gonna sound ridiculous, but this is a true story

a friend of mine, we were probably like 12 or 13 at the time, had just gotten this new water gun. now mind you, it wasnt one of those "real looking" guns, but was actually a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles water gun.
anyway, because he needed money for something, and his parents said no, he decided to rob the deli around the corner (that we always went to, so the guy knew us all) with this TMNT water gun that was green plastic.
anyway, the guy didnt even call the cops, he just started yelling at this kid about how dumb he was and told him to leave and the kid just walked out with his head down

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TallJames is the man

LARRY FITZGERALD FOR HEISMAN!
That song rips off Cut the Mullet
Snoogans 1, Monitor 0

[high fly]

About a year ago there was a beaut in D.C.
2 cars o' undercover cops were on a stakeout late one night.
Some dolt comes along and starts to try to steal one of the car's license plates. He couldn't get it off, had the car a-rockin'.
So he goes to his car, opens the trunk and gets some tools, and goes back to work.
Finally he gets the plate off, goes to his car and that's when the fuzz moved in and nailed him.



Sometimes if you sit real still, they'll come right up to you.



.

" and they ask me why I drink"

[PapaBear]

This is the only stupid criminal thread I could find for this post. And like the guy mentioned in the first post, this one was also 22.

Last night, my sister and her husband heard someone in their yard yelling "hey". They live in a fairly isolated and wooded area, and don't have people nearby very often, so my brother in law yells out to him to identify himself. Turns out, it was a State Trooper. He said he was chasing someone on foot in the woods and his flashlight died. He wanted to borrow one.

So, my brother in law gets one, and helps with the search. The guy on the run had been in a drunk driving accident and had been arrested. He was sitting in the Trooper's car, handcuffed and belted in, but somehow escaped while the cop was further investigating the scene. They guy went running into the woods, on a totally dark night, with his hands cuffed behind his back.

They found him. Dead. He ran right off an 18 foot embankment and into a rocky creek. (http://www.winchesterstar.com/showarticle_new.php?sID=6&foldername=20080910&file=escape_article.html)

[Willmore]

Live Free or Die Hard.