Tips for a first-time flyer

[HBox]

Later this summer I will be flying out to Seattle. This won't be my first time flying, but the only other time I flew was when I was a kid so I don't remember much.

So I want to ask for a little help. I pretty much know nothing about what to expect, both at the airport and during the flight.

I'm going out of Newark, so how much earlier do I need to get there? I'm flying Continental. Good airline? What can I expect in-flight? Any tips would be appreciated.

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[ChickenHawk]

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[HBox]

Now I can't wait!

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[WindowSill]

Continental is my favorite airline. Good, new, safe fleet. TVs right in front of you. Never flew out of Newark though...


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[McNabbShouldDie]

I'm also flying Continental from Newark to Ireland in a little over a week and I'm departing at 8:30 and getting to the airport at 5:30. I thought 3 hours seems like alot but the group im going with has been told to get there 3 hours earlier.

As far as the flight, everyones been tellin me to take this dramameen(sp?) stuff. Puts you to sleep apparently and fixes ya from flippin out during takeoff/landing.

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[SatCam]

I have only been on one vacation involving planes, but the best thing to do is just take the time to relax... you won't be getting any sleep!!!

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[furie]

yeah, Continental's a good airline.


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[Neogoon]

[font=Century gothic][color=navy][size=2]So I want to ask for a little help. I pretty much know nothing about what to expect, both at the airport and during the flight.
Get a window seat where you have a clear view of the wings. If, at any point during the flight (but especially around takeoff and landing) you see bits of the wing moving, shifting or opening, it means that they're about to fall off and you're going to die.

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[Tall_James]

Don't worry. You'll be fine. Statistics back this up. Have a couple of drinks and try and pick up a cute stewardess.

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[jeffdwright2001]

Don't get on the plane if you see this little guy hanging around:
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[wilee]

Continental out of Newark is pretty good. I usually fly them on my trips to Indy.

If you haven't done it before, use their website and get an E-ticket. It makes things go so much quicker. Since you're flying to Seattle, I'm assuming that you're not taking an ERJ. Probably a 737-747. The food on Continental is OK, but not 4-star by any standard. Same as with most other airlines.

Two things about Newark - Don't wear workboots when taking the flight out. You'll most likely have to take them off when going through the metal detector. Back when I went to Indy in May, they recently added a new luggage x-ray machine off to the side of the ticket counters. We had to carry our bags over to it to be checked instead of the attendant behind the counter putting it on the conveyour belt to the luggage area, so be prepared to cart the bags a little.

Oh, and tie something unique (colored cloth) to the handle of your bag to make it easier to identify when you reclaim it.

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[Neogoon]

Okay, this one is actually useful, especially if you're flying solo. If you're enrolled in a frequent flier program, you're less likely to be singled out for special screening (where they search the luggage you're checking, etc.) I was flying from Kennedy to Dulles last fall, and the ticket agent asked me pointedly "Are you SURE you don't have your frequent flier number with you?" a few times before she finally spelled it out for my jet-lagged ass.

Because, of course, no self-respecting terrorist would ever enroll in a frequent flier program.

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[Iamnotatool]

Tips for a first-time flyer


Don't crash.

Stay away from towelheads.

Don't crash.

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[Iamnotatool]

PS. You will probably crash and die a fiery death. Have a great time.

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[keithy_19]

I'm also going to Ireland. I'm a little hesitant(sp?). My first flight and I guess I'll just try to relax, listen to music and read the tales and poems of Edgar Allan Poe.

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[furie]

If you're enrolled in a frequent flier program, you're less
likely to be singled out for special screening


actually no. being in a frequent flier program doesn't affect
your status of being made a selectee. there are diffrent
factors. it changed.



This message was edited by furie on 6-29-04 @ 8:03 PM

[The Nature Boy]

Don't worry about:

-a little bit of shaking or turbulance. Or a lot of it for that matter. It's routine as you'll see and not worth a worry. It WILL happen.

-don't worry about the "fasten seatbelts" light. It goes on all the time, and is a precaution and only necessary because people don't use their belts all the time like they should. Not a big deal

-Once you are airborne, you're good. Things rarely go wrong inflight. When mishaps do happen, it's usually on take off or landing. If you MUST worry, worry then. Not once you are on a flying party missle 7 miles high.

-if you are concerned or worried about flying, take a valium or 3 Tylenol PM's about a 1/2 before takeoff. Shut your eyes and wake up on the old sod.



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[Hottub]

I'm also going to Ireland. I'm a little hesitant


guy's. I have gone to Ireland 5 times. Here is the key...

Order Guinness early and often. When they run out of Guinness, order Murphey's. when they run out of Murphey's, go to the first class galley, and ask for Guinness/Murphey's. They will provide!
When you have wiped out all of the stout on the plane, take a massive leak and pass out while watching IRC News or Gigli.

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[ADF]

Flap your arms a lot and have hollow bones, or something. Oh, and eat some feathers. It'll make for a softer landing.

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[FUNKMAN]

You'll be fine. Statistics back this up


i look at it a different way... what do you have a better chance of surviving, a car crash or a plane crash?

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[Furtherman]

<p>I'm not sure of the statistics, but it is possible to survive a plane crash:</p><p><em><font face="Arial" size="5"><font size="2"><a href="http://www.airsafe.com/events/survivor.htm" target="_blank">Fatal Events with a Sole Survivor</a></font> </font></em></p>

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[Knowledged_one]

Dont' take morphine based medication ahead of time.&nbsp; I took some Diladid before a flight and it made me sweat and my stomach flip flopped - damn recreational drugs

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[Death Metal Moe]

<p><img height="240" src="http://www.epicsoftware.com/images/model_lib/tools/box_cutter_large.jpg" width="320" border="0" /></p><p>MAKE SURE you bring your box cutters.&nbsp; Have at least 6 of them, seriously.&nbsp; This will speed things up at the counter, and on the flight.&nbsp; They only serve you a meal if you put a box cutter on the corner of your tray table.&nbsp; Also, wave it around to get the stewardess's attention when you need more Mr. Pibb.</p><p>It's also good form to tip the security guys with one.</p>

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[Knowledged_one]

Moe that only works on one way flights

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Kicking it old school on the board again

[badorties]

<p>&nbsp;</p><p><font size="1">Flap your arms a lot and have hollow bones, or something. Oh, and eat some feathers. It'll make for a softer landing.</font></p><p>and remember to miss the ground, that's the most important point</p>

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[furie]

<font face="Verdana" style="font-size: 9px;">quote:</font>Moe that only works on one way flights

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Kicking it old school on the board again<br />it took me a minute to get that one<br />


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[A.J.]

Bring a book so you can ignore the pain in the ass person you will undoubtedly be stuck next to.

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[onyon]

bring a small bottle of after shave and put some on your top lip if you sit next to a stinky basterd also works when visiting grandparents.

[DJEvelEd]

<strong>Stuff your rectum with plenty of high grade marijuana.</strong>

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[Bulldogcakes]

<p>My two best suggestions for a long flight. </p><p>#1-Stay up all night the night before your flight. </p><p>It'll
give you a better chance of being able to sleep on the plane, and if
you're nervous you'll be too tired to really panic. &nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>#2-ANYTHING EXPENSIVE (Laptop, Watch, Jewelry) GOES IN YOUR CARRY ON. NO EXCEPTIONS. </p><p>The reality is your bags will be x-rayed, and most US airports have their share of crooked employees. &nbsp;</p>

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Do Siamese twins have to file seperate tax returns? Or do they file jointly?

[Bulldogcakes]

<p>&nbsp;</p><font face="Verdana" style="font-size: 9px;">quote:</font>Don't worry. You'll be fine. Statistics back this up. Have a couple of drinks and try and pick up a cute stewardess.&nbsp;<a target="blank" href="http://cheeseeatingbird.blogspot.com"></a><br />Only trouble is, most of them are more like this<p>&nbsp;</p><p>http://users.tpg.com.au/adslko0l/images/QueerNation3%20boy.jpg&nbsp;</p>

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Do Siamese twins have to file seperate tax returns? Or do they file jointly?