Bill O'Reilly is harshing my buzz!

[HBox]

Text of a hilarious Bill O'Reilly interview of Jon Stewart. (http://students.whitman.edu/~krohnkl/oreilly_with_stewart.html)

Here are some choice O'Reilly quotes:

O'REILLY: But it is. It's true. I mean, you've got stoned slackers watching your dopey show every night, OK, and they can vote.

STEWART: Yeah.

O'REILLY: You can't stop them.

O'REILLY: Come on, you do the research, you know the research on your program.

STEWART: No, we don't.

O'REILLY: Eighty-seven percent are intoxicated when they watch it. You didn't see that?

STEWART: No, I didn't realize that.

O'REILLY: Yeah, we have that there.

Puppets can't vote, but these dopey kids who watch you can.

No, I'm talking 18 to 25, you know. The people who are on your intellectual level.

O'REILLY: OK, when you get a guy like Kerry on...

STEWART: Yes.

O'REILLY: ... and again, he bypassed me, so I took it personally, he went over to talk to you...

O'REILLY: What do you think Kerry wants to get out of coming on your show?

STEWART: He wants to get what any politician does: access to a new constituency. He wants to get...

O'REILLY: The stoned slackers.

Don't you think that these guys want to be hip, when McCain was on with you -- Bush hasn't been on with you, right? You would remember that...

I think he wants to be hip. I do. I think going on your show is a cache, and he's considered the hipper candidate than the square.

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[JPMNICK]

Is this really serious? thats crazy if it is. Good for john stewart though. his show rocks and if he gets people to vote, then who cares how they do it. just because it is not like Bill's view does not mean it is wrong. the more young people that vote the better.

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This message was edited by JPMNICK on 9-20-04 @ 10:50 PM

[cheezeemee]

I don't think Bill O'Reilly ever had a childhood. He hates rap and rappers and now he hates muppets.

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[42nd-delay]

He's going to make one extra crotchety old man.

------------------------------
"42nd-delay is the only person who's making sense." - Ron, 3-12-02

This message was edited by 42nd-delay on 9-20-04 @ 10:57 PM

[WindowSill]

O'REILLY: But you do have some influence. Now, how do you see that? You have influence. John Kerry bypassed me and went right over to you. You're only four blocks away. He said, "O'Reilly, I don't think so. Stewart, I'm going to go talk to you."

STEWART: Well, I have to tell you -- and again, I mean no disrespect, but the snack selection backstage, quite frankly...



Fuckin hilarious....


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This message was edited by WindowSill on 9-20-04 @ 11:01 PM

[furie]

Bill O'Reilly's an ass. if people stop watching him he'll go away. Look at Donohue.


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[HBox]

Fuck that. I might start watching him just for the comedy after reading this.

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This message was edited by HBox on 9-20-04 @ 11:10 PM

[Yerdaddy]

OReilly sounds bitter about a guy that might be getting better ratings. I know I'm not going to miss the Daily Show tonight.

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Fuck it from behind.

[reeshy]

Bill O'Reilly used to be my Uncle...I still hate him!!!

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[shamus mcfitzy]

JON STEWART, "THE DAILY SHOW": How are you, sir?


O'REILLY: OK. You know what's really frightening?



wow, what a classy guy Bill is. Doesn't even answer a pleasantry, just immediately tries to jump on Jon Stewart. If anything he's his mirror image: they would both have an effect on the election in equally biased ways. I don't know if Bill even knows this anymore. He sincerly believes that he's impartial and that is truly frightening.


O'REILLY: Well, you asked me why I was such a bad person, didn't you, or something like that? Wasn't that a serious question?

STEWART: Did I ask you why you were a bad person?

O'REILLY: Yeah, I think so.

STEWART: No, I wouldn't have done that.

O'REILLY: ... "scum of the earth, O'Reilly," I think that's the way you put it.



Bill's a crazy person. He's hearing things and should probably be put out to pasture if he doesn't understand humor in conversation. Put out to pasture as in like life terms, not just his TV show.

I don't like the idea that there are people out there that are so paranoid and yet so pseudo-intelligent. Well, other people.....


STEWART: "Shnicks," we call it shnicks -- shnicks and giggles.


i personally loved that line.

This message was edited by shamus mcfitzy on 9-21-04 @ 1:46 AM

[KillOReilly]

Didn't G.W. Bush have the right to vote when he and Laura were stoned slackers? Does Bill not want people to be able to vote at that age?

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[silera]

I'm not so sure Laura still isn't stoned.


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[A.J.]

I'm not so sure Laura still isn't stoned.


Did she teach art when she was a teacher?

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[NyteOwl]

Did anybody even watch this interview? It was done tongue in cheek. Not crotchety. It was actually pretty funny. I guess you had to be there.




New poster....but been reading this board forever.
Hi everybody!

[Patches]

NYte Owl's right... They've been on each others show a few times, and its pretty obvious they are on cool terms. The night before this show O'Reilly was talking about the next nights guests and referred to Stewart as very funny and 'our good pal'. Lighten up people.

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[Yerdaddy]

<A href="http://www.state.gov/s/ct/rls/pgtrpt/2003/c12108.htm" target="_blank">Stewart's fans more educated than O'Reilly's</a>


The folks at Comedy Central were annoyed when Fox News Channel's Bill O'Reilly kept referring to "The Daily Show" audience as "stoned slackers." So they did a little research. And guess whose audience is more educated?

Viewers of Jon Stewart's show are more likely to have completed four years of college than people who watch "The O'Reilly Factor," according to Nielsen Media Research.


Comedy Central executives realized, and O'Reilly acknowledged, that he was poking fun. But they said they didn't want a misconception to persist.

"If the head of General Motors was watching O'Reilly's show, that could be very important to us," said Doug Herzog, Comedy Central president.


Comedy Central also touted a recent study by the University of Pennsylvania's National Annenberg Election Survey, which said young viewers of "The Daily Show" were more likely to answer questions about politics correctly than those who don't.

Comedy Central had no statistics on how many people watch "The Daily Show" stoned.


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Fuck it from behind.