favorite urban legend [Archive] - RonFez.net Messageboard

BooBooKittyFuck

11-09-2004, 05:07 PM

what is your favorite urban legend?

mine is...

a girl is staying home alone and everytime she gets scared she reaches under her bed and lets her dog lick her hand.

when she wakes up she goes into the bathroom

she opens up the shower curtain and sees her dog hanging there dripping blood and written on the wall is... humans can lick too

there are so many more but i think that one freaked me out the most

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Katylina

11-09-2004, 05:09 PM

Mary's Grave

I posted about it somewhere once before.

Edit: Here it is-
http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/viewmessages.cfm/Forum/52/Topic/31612/page/Haunted_Legends.htm
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This message was edited by Katylina on 11-9-04 @ 9:10 PM

torker

11-09-2004, 05:12 PM

spider eggs in bubble yum

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BoondockSaint

11-09-2004, 05:13 PM

The one about Mike D. from the Beastie Boys and Screech are Neil Diamond's sons.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/squrl/huntnixsig.jpg

JPMNICK

11-09-2004, 05:13 PM

the picture under the plates at the wedding.

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furie

11-09-2004, 05:15 PM

the g-spot

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Katylina

11-09-2004, 05:16 PM

I want to hear the legends! I haven't heard of any of these.

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grlNIN

11-09-2004, 05:17 PM

As trite as this one is, it always horrifed me the most.....the call is coming from inside the house.

 
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reeshy

11-09-2004, 05:21 PM

How about..." Honey, the IRS man is here to see you!!!!"

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furie

11-09-2004, 05:23 PM

seriously, I always liked the one when a boy and girls are making out at "lookout point" or whatever, and the boy hears a noise, he leave to investigate. The girl falls a sleep, but sleeps restlessly because she keeps hearing a scraping noise. she is woken up by a cop banging on the window. her boyfriend was killed by some random mass murderer and hung upsidedown from a tree, and the scraping noise was his fingers as he twisted in the wind.

teen-aged sexual angst.

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BooBooKittyFuck

11-09-2004, 05:26 PM

i heard the spider eggs and the call one but what is the one with the picture?

i also like the one when the woman gets her car stolen with her purse in the car and the person who stole it leaves it in her driveway with a note saying "i am sorry i took your car, i got your address out of your purse. I needed to get to the hospital right away. in thanks here are 2 tickets to a play."

when the woman and her husband leave to go to the play the person breaks into the house

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Mike Teacher

11-09-2004, 05:27 PM

My Uncle Bill (http://www.snopes.com/risque/penile/scrotum.htm)

Edit: Umm... i dont think its Work Safe

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This message was edited by Mike Teacher on 11-9-04 @ 9:27 PM

BooBooKittyFuck

11-09-2004, 05:28 PM

or the toothbrush one...

a person goes on vacation and their hotel room gets broken into and all that is left is their toothbrush and a videotape. after the person brushes their teeth and gets ready for bed after the hard day of police reports they put in the tape and it is of the person who broke into their room, doing nasty thigs to the toothbrush.

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JPMNICK

11-09-2004, 05:31 PM

i like the one where you are on vacation, go home and get the pics developed, and find out that the maid rat-holed your toothbrush and took pics of it.

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BooBooKittyFuck

11-09-2004, 05:37 PM

STAPLED!! ACK!!!

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BooBooKittyFuck

11-09-2004, 05:48 PM

Subject: Altoids in a whole new light

This is an absolutely true story-forward it around to friends who might get a kick out of it.

Had the most interesting conversation with the top sales weasel at our company today. She came into my office and noticed I had a box of Altoids on my desk.

(Have you had them? They are these obnoxiously strong peppermints made in England.) As soon as she saw them, she burst into laughter. Turns out she had recently had an affair with a guy who called her and left her an incredibly steamy voice mail message after an encounter. He went on and on about what a blow job goddess she was, how amazing she was, how he'd never be the same, etc. She was kind of puzzled, thinking: what did I do to this guy that was so different from my regular technique?

She finally figured it out: she's a smoker, and before getting intimate with him, she had gone to the bathroom to "freshen up." Not having a toothbrush, she crunched on about four Altoids and then got busy. Apparently things went amazingly.

So she passed this little tidbit on to another female sales weasel, who immediately tried it out on *her* fiance. Apparently this guy has never, ever been into oral sex, but liked the mint sensation so much that he asked her to stop and chew another Altoid mid-blow job. He is now a fellatio gourmand.

This news has been going around our office. Having a box of Altoids on your desk is now like being part of the Secret Blowjob Goddess Society. It's the equivalent of having the hottest car or coolest computer. News spread like crazy among the females, who all went out at lunch to Walgreens to buy a box of Altoids (about $2 for 100 or so), and their partners across the city tonight are getting one hell of a corporate blow job. As far as company-wide morale boosting events, it doesn't get much better.

Some of the men found out, too -- they went out after work to buy them for their wives. They strategized on how to get their wives to eat them.

And people wonder why I work in technology.

(For what it's worth -- it really does work! It leaves a lasting tingle that is apparently quite exquisite.)

or so they say on the urban legends page... i wanna try it

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DJEvelEd

11-09-2004, 05:56 PM

favorite urban legend

My favorite urban legend is the Crackhead marrying the Hooker and living happily ever after.

It's true I tell ya!!!!!

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fezident

11-09-2004, 06:54 PM

The one aboot the guy who has a fiance in Niagra Falls Ontario Canada.

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BoondockSaint

11-09-2004, 07:42 PM

I want to hear the legends! I haven't heard of any of these.

Well the one I posted was a stupid one. Mike from the Beastie Boys calls himself Michael Diamond and Screech's name is Dustin Diamond. So there was a rumor that they were Neil Diamond's sons.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/squrl/huntnixsig.jpg

reeshy

11-09-2004, 07:43 PM

What about that legend of the inbreds somewhere in NJ...some town is supposed to inhabited by them!!!!

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keithy_19

11-09-2004, 07:45 PM

teen-aged sexual angst.

That was actually based on a true story. The only thing is I...the guy didn't die. He simply fell and scraped his knee and the girl locked the door and pretended to sleep.

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JPMNICK

11-09-2004, 07:45 PM

Jackson Whites

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Thanks to Monsterone for my first sig.

FUNKMAN

11-09-2004, 07:52 PM

the rubber hose or the sack full of oranges

supposedly if you got arrested and were being held at the precint you may get beat with one of these objects because they would do a job on your insides but not leave a mark on your outsides

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BoondockSaint

11-09-2004, 07:53 PM

Isn't there one about a Jersey Devil? I think there is an X-Files episode about it. And I think that's where the hockey team gets it's name.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/squrl/huntnixsig.jpg

FUNKMAN

11-09-2004, 07:59 PM

we had a few houses in the neighborhood that looked old and haunted and we always wanted to think that a witch lived inside. in most cases we never saw who lived in them and sometimes we would ring the bell and run for our lives.

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MrPink

11-09-2004, 09:13 PM

mine is the one about the med students puttin a severed leg in a girl's bed and they found her eatin it the next morning.

"Would you fuck me? I'd fuck me"

kevcala

11-09-2004, 09:52 PM

The one where the girl leaves her female college roommate to go to sleep while she goes out. After a few drinks she comes home to get a jacket, but didn't want to wake the roomate so she slips in and grabs the jacket without turning on the light. The next morning she comes home to find the cops in her room. She looks inside and see's her room mate killed and written on the wall in her blood was, "Aren't you glad you didn't turn on the lights"

It's kind of a variance of the people can lick too one.

This one fucked me up something good when I first heard it.

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DJEvelEd

11-10-2004, 03:38 AM

The Black Irish

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BooBooKittyFuck

11-10-2004, 03:46 AM

the one with aren't you glad you didn't turn on the light was is way creepy. did you hear the one about the dog in the microwave? an old lady was washing her dog and wanted to dry him quickly so she stuck him in the microwave to dry. needless to say the dog didn't make it

or if you go tanning you could be baking your insides. the tanning rays in the machine cook your insides and you could die.

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Thx PanterA for the cool Pic

Jennitalia

11-10-2004, 04:02 AM

the one where the girl was fucking a hot dog and it broke inside her.

there was also a story about a girl in my middle school who was fucking her bedpost and her parents walked in on her

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BooBooKittyFuck

11-10-2004, 04:08 AM

did you hear the one about the girl who went swimming in the ocean and got pregnant from octopus sperm in the water. she went to the doctor from pain and being sick constantly. when the doctor did an ultrasound they found out she had a bunch of baby octopuses (sp?) octopi (?) inside of her.

... really it was crabs lol

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Katylina

11-10-2004, 04:11 AM

the one where the girl was fucking a hot dog and it broke inside her.

We had one of those in our school too! We also had the one of the guy who fucked a sheep, but I really think that one was true.

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angrymissy

11-10-2004, 05:14 AM

there was also a story about a girl in my middle school who was fucking her bedpost and her parents walked in on her

hahaha we had that one too except everyone said she was fucking a big cucumber.

but there was one kid who went on the french class trip to France in like 8th grade and got caught jerking off in his bedroom by the teacher and some kids and NEVER lived it down

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This message was edited by angrymissy on 11-10-04 @ 9:15 AM

Furtherman

11-10-2004, 06:38 AM

What about that legend of the inbreds somewhere in NJ...some town is supposed to inhabited by them!!!!

That's not an urban legend Reeshy, it's almost true.

What you heard was a distortion of The Mine Area people. It's easy to see how that legend was born.

It is an area inhabated by a handful of families. It was first founded by Native Americans and freed Slaves after the Civil War. They're still there. I have friends who grew up near them and they're a people who stick to themselves. They're kids go to the local public schools and you'll see them around town but they mostly stay together.

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furie

11-10-2004, 12:42 PM

Jackson Whites

didn't Ron and Fez do a bit on them?

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East Side Dave

11-10-2004, 03:06 PM

What about that legend of the inbreds somewhere in NJ...some town is supposed to inhabited by them!!!!

You can read all about that shit and more in Weird NJ magazine! Go to the website! Spooky!

This one's just about a little person making firewood! But still! Ahhhhhh!

MIDNIGHT MIDGET IN THE WOODPILE

I used to live in Nutley. I was originally from Detroit, and therefore new to the area. I had friends from Nutley, Belleville, Montclair, etc. Anyway, one of my good friends told me about this place where midgets lived. She swore one night she had been driving through the place when she saw a midget out chopping wood. This was around midnight!

She got spooked by that, so I could never convince her to take me there. But eventually I did get someone to take me there, and I've been through it more than a few times, and have seen the little people in their windows! Unfortunately, I don't know the name of the road. However I do know it's on the same road as Annie's grave, which made Midgetville even spookier!

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This message was edited by East Side Dave on 11-10-04 @ 7:07 PM

Hottub

11-10-2004, 03:16 PM

I always found this one pretty horrific. After reading this page, go to the main page for all the legends you can handle. (http://urbanlegends.about.com/library/bllobster.htm)

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GodsFavoriteMan

11-10-2004, 03:22 PM

The Brazilian Saci used to scare the hell out of me as a kid. People saw it different ways, but when I was in Brazil they used to tell it as a kind of ghost story.

Essentially the Saci is a black boy with one leg and a red cap. He either was just a random mischeif maker, or he was a harbinger of death. Depended on who told you the story.

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FUNKMAN

11-10-2004, 03:53 PM

Rod Stewart getting his stomach pumped

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BooBooKittyFuck

11-10-2004, 04:18 PM

there was one that i heard about a man who calls himself the "viper" but it turns out he has an accent and was a window wiper or something... anyone hear this one? please post if you know it

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furie

11-10-2004, 07:51 PM

that was a Gi-Joe episode.

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GodsFavoriteMan

11-10-2004, 08:03 PM

I read the Viper story in a collection of ghost stories for kids.

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BooBooKittyFuck

11-11-2004, 03:53 AM

i have heard so many varients of this one...

it seems that a group of young college women went to florida for spring break. while there, one of them met the perfect man and fell madly in love. by the end of the week they were engaged. but, of course, spring break ended, and the girl had to fly home. at the airport, the man gave her a ring box which she assumed was an engagement ring. when she got home, she excitedly told her family and friends all about mr wonderful, and with them around, opened the ring box, which turned out to contain a toy skeleton and a piece of paper which said (of course) "welcome to the world of aids."

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Thx PanterA for the cool Pic

newport king

11-11-2004, 04:52 AM

the one where the girl was fucking a hot dog and it broke inside her.

i went to highschool with this girl too.

and didn't mikey die from a bad combo of cocacola and poprocks.

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BooBooKittyFuck

11-11-2004, 04:53 PM

my boss went to school with mikey, he said he is alive and well but a total dick lol

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Thx PanterA for the cool Pic

RocOutWithYACockOUT

11-11-2004, 06:15 PM

The one were the parents leave the baby with the sitter and they call up from the restaurant to check up and the sitter says everything is just fine. She says that she just put the turkey in the microwave. Well the parents freak out and rush home to find the the sitter high on pot and the baby in the microwave.

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INFOSTUD

11-11-2004, 07:02 PM

Thanks you bastards now I have to sleep with my lights on forever!!!

The "Aren't you glad you didn't turn the lights on" urban myth is an old one. It still gives me a chill.

Weird NJ does have some good urban myths. One dark winter dark I'm reading in bed. I was reading about these tunnels people got lost in and died. Then the phone rang and the magazine flew out of my hands. It was my dad. The phone ringing while I was engrossed in that story scared the hell out of me.

My dad thought it was funny.

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This message was edited by INFOSTUD on 11-11-04 @ 11:03 PM

reeshy

11-11-2004, 07:24 PM

Rod Stewart getting his stomach pumped

Not a legend....it's true....I was there...no shit!!!!!

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BooBooKittyFuck

11-12-2004, 04:10 AM

Mike Teacher

11-12-2004, 04:50 AM

travels of Amphibians that "Take The Pipes" as a means of transportation, and usually ends up with some little croc-a-gator climbing out of a bowl and biting someone one the ass.

William Poundstone wrote a series of books Big/Bigger/Biggest Secrets, and they rock. He tries to find out what the real secret ingredients are in coke and KFC, and investigates all sorts or stuff, some I remember that were psuedo-fact or legend; some sound downright [Cue Gandolfini:] Gay?!

-The Recipe for Coke isnt written anywhere, but only Two people in the Company know it at any given time, and they are not allowed to fly on the same airplane flight.

-Bar Codes have 666 embeded in them, or are based on 666

-The Scret KFC recipe consists of 11 herbs and spices that sit on most kitchen shelves

-A whole list of songs with backwards tracks/messaging on them

-Whale Vomit is used in the worlds most expensive perfumes. Ditto with Mink Piss and Anal Gland crap

-Shitloads of secret embedded messages and signs in US Currency

-All sorts of Subliminal Shots in Movies

-What Rorschach tests means, what a Lie Detector does and how to beat it, and coolest of all, he explains exactly how David Copperfield made the statue of liberty disappear on Live TV.

Amazon It.

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This message was edited by Mike Teacher on 11-12-04 @ 9:09 AM

TheMojoPin

11-12-2004, 08:19 AM

there was an email circulating about a cookie recipe a couple years back where this woman offered to pay for a recipe thinking it was 2.00 but they charged her credit card 200.00, does anyone remember that one?

It's been around for a few decades. It's actually usually applied to a certain type of fancy red velvet cake.

There's a lot of great sources for reading up on urban legends...Snopes.com (http://www.snopes.com) is one that everyone probably already knows about.

One guy to look out for is an author/professor by the name of Jan Harold Brunvand. The guys has written at least half a dozen books about hundreds of different urban legends over the last 20 years, and he explores the origins of each one, how society and the historical era around each one shaped their creation, or their eventual "mutations" over time. They're really fascinating studies, and show how these legends really reflect us as a society at any given moment.

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/0393972232.01._SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpg

Brunvand's books. (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/search-handle-url/index=books&field-author=Jan%20Harold%20Brunvand/102-5968428-6357741)

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MrPink

11-12-2004, 09:10 AM

We had one of those in our school too! We also had the one of the guy who fucked a sheep, but I really think that one was true.

i spent alot of time in calvert county and that is indeed true. everybody's doin it now. maybe even me

"Would you fuck me? I'd fuck me"

Furtherman

01-12-2009, 07:23 AM

Isn't there one about a Jersey Devil? I think there is an X-Files episode about it. And I think that's where the hockey team gets it's name.

Yes, it's the 100th anniversary of what has become known as the "Phenomenal Week," when the monster lovingly known as the Jersey Devil was spotted no less than 30 times from Jan. 16-22, 1909. (http://www.pressofatlanticcity.com/186/story/369795.html)

http://media.pressofatlanticcity.com/smedia/2009/01/12/07/356-devil.embedded.prod_affiliate.101.jpg