What supernatural abilities does mikeyboy have?

[JustJon]

<p>As we all realized in this week's <a href="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/viewmessages.cfm/CurrentPage/8/forum/46/Topic/50815/RequestTimeout/500" target="_self">Listening thread</a>, mikeyboy has supernatural abilities, that allow him to go above and beyond our mortal ken.&nbsp; But what exactly are the extend of his powers?</p>

<p>To recap from the thread...</p>

<p><span class="postbody"><strong>JustJon:</strong> The reason we hired mikeyboy is
his supernatural powers.&nbsp; He was able to edit the post two minutes
before it was actually posted. </span></p>

<p><span class="postbody"><strong>Plethora:</strong> Mikeyboy is not constrained by the pedestrian vagaries of the space-time continuum.</span> </p>
<p><strong>Chimneyfish: </strong><span class="postbody">Mikeyboy took down Tyson in the third round.</span></p><p><strong>Furtherman:</strong> <span class="postbody">Mikeyboy restored our timeline, inventing Rock &amp; Roll and elimating those pesky Mastadons in the process.</span></p><p><strong>A.J.:</strong> <span class="postbody">Mikeyboy&nbsp;did that by using the Guardian of Forever to prevent Bones from saving Edith Keeler?</span> </p><p>&nbsp;</p>

<p>&nbsp;</p>

[Don Stugots]

i think he is really Superman.

[mdr55]

He can send people to vacations far far away.<br />

[AngelAmy]

<strong>mdr55</strong> wrote:<br />He can send people to vacations far far away.<br /><p>for free</p>

[PapaBear]

Traffic lights are never red for Mikeyboy.

[mendyweiss]

The wind is always at his back

[Plethora]

Thanks to Mikeyboy's multi-phased back-scatter reality morphonic dissonance devolver pen-knife, he can simultaneously be in the studio, finding obscure bits for Ron &amp; Fez, bill three different clients, and ban posters with cutlery-related pseudonyms for fights over showering, all while <em>showering.</em><br />

[AKA]

Mikeyboy once shot a man just to watch him die - then brought him back to life again, just so he could shoot him again - just to watch him die.

[PapaBear]

<p>Mikeyboy stented Fez...</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>with his bare hands.</p>

[Furtherman]

Mikeyboy broke the 8 minute record for holding his breath.&nbsp; <em>On Pluto.</em>

[UnknownPD]

<font size="2">Mikeyboy can ...</font>

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by UnknownPD on 6-20-06 @ 7:01 PM</span>

[suggums]

mikeyboy is always where you need him. new york, dc, it doesn't matter<br />

[Tenbatsuzen]

<p>Mikey can turn water into wine.</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>He doesn't need all of you to believe him - just 12.</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>

[ADF]

Mikeyboy can pick two matching socks out of the sock drawer whilest blindfolded.<br />

[torker]

<p>Mikeboy can create shirt stains that are invulnerable to all known detergents and solvents.</p><p>(edit: FezPaul Alert)</p>

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by torker on 6-20-06 @ 6:38 PM</span>

[reeshy]

Mikey can conjugate a verb 8 different ways while showing Fezzy how to seduce a woman....and Fezzy getting it!!!!!

[FUNKMAN]

Mikeyboy can walk on land and swim in water...

[narc]

<hr color="cococo" align="left"></font><strong>PapaBear</strong> wrote:<br><p>Mikeyboy stented Fez...</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>with his bare hands.</p><hr color="cococo" align="left"><p></p>

<br><p>
Not with his bare hands....With his mind.

<br><p>
Not with his mind...with his Johnson.

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by narc on 6-20-06 @ 6:41 PM</span>

[Plethora]

<strong>narc</strong> wrote:<br /><strong>PapaBear</strong> wrote:<br /><p>Mikeyboy stented Fez...</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>with his bare hands.</p><p>&nbsp;</p>

<br /><p>
Not with his bare hands....With his mind.

<br /></p><p><span style="background-color: rgb(255, 255, 102);">
Not with his mind...with his Johnson.

</span><span class="post_edited">This message was edited by narc on 6-20-06 @ 6:41 PM</span></p><p>&nbsp;</p>Hmm. I believe Ron cautioned Fez against this sort of activity as it would most likely just clog things up.<br />

[PanterA]

<p>I saw Mikey catch a child from a burning building, after he helped a blind man cross the street.</p>

[Gvac]

<p>Mikeyboy stole my socks without ever taking off my shoes.&nbsp; </p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>

[PanterA]

<strong>Gvac</strong> wrote:<br /><p>Mikeyboy stole my socks without ever taking off my shoes.&nbsp; </p><p>Thats because you keep your socks down your pants.</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Mikey steals from the rich and gives to the poor.</p>

[FezPaul]

<strong>torker</strong> wrote:<br /><p>Mikeboy can create shirt stains that are invulnerable to all known detergents and solvents.</p><p><strong>(edit: FezPaul Alert)</strong></p><span class="post_edited">This message was edited by torker on 6-20-06 @ 6:38 PM</span> <p><strong><font face="courier new,courier,monospace" size="2">For what?&nbsp; <img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/tiny_mce/plugins/emotions/images/huh.gif" border="0" /></font></strong></p>

[Tall_James]

Who is Mikeyboy? He is supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody believed he was real. Nobody ever saw him or knew anybody that ever worked directly for him, but to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for Mikeyboy. You never knew. That was his power. The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. And poof. Just like that, he's gone.

[torker]

<strong>FezPaul</strong> wrote:<br /><strong>torker</strong> wrote:<br /><p>Mikeboy can create shirt stains that are invulnerable to all known detergents and solvents.</p><p><strong>(edit: FezPaul Alert)</strong></p><span class="post_edited">This message was edited by torker on 6-20-06 @ 6:38 PM</span> <p><strong><font face="courier new,courier,monospace" size="2">For what?&nbsp; <img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/tiny_mce/plugins/emotions/images/huh.gif" border="0" /></font></strong></p><p>i ficed an eror&nbsp;inn mie speling</p>

[FezPaul]

<strong>torker</strong> wrote:<br /><strong>FezPaul</strong> wrote:<br /><strong>torker</strong> wrote:<br /><p>Mikeboy can create shirt stains that are invulnerable to all known detergents and solvents.</p><p><strong>(edit: FezPaul Alert)</strong></p><span class="post_edited">This message was edited by torker on 6-20-06 @ 6:38 PM</span> <p><strong><font face="courier new,courier,monospace" size="2">For what?&nbsp; <img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/tiny_mce/plugins/emotions/images/huh.gif" border="0" /></font></strong></p><p>i ficed an eror&nbsp;inn mie speling</p><p>Lo<strong><font face="courier new,courier,monospace" size="2">oks good to me, but then again, I'm just a truck-driver.&nbsp;&nbsp; <img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/tiny_mce/plugins/emotions/images/bye.gif" border="0" /></font></strong></p>

[bobrobot]

<p><strong><font color="#000099">Mikeyboy knows zackly where Gvac's hat is, but he can't tell 'cause it would disrupt the time space continuum, &amp; life on earth as we know it!!!</font></strong></p><p><img src="http://mandatemedia.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/twilight_zone_guy_1.jpg" border="0" /><img height="170" src="http://www.australia-fare.com/images/hats/hat.jpg" width="255" border="0" /></p>

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by bobogolem on 6-20-06 @ 8:26 PM</span>

[Judge Smails]

One time Mikeyboy offered to buy me a drink.&nbsp; We go off looking for a bar and we can't find one.&nbsp; Finally,&nbsp;Mikeyboy takes me to a vacant lot and says: &quot;Here we are.&quot;&nbsp; We sat there for a year and a half and sure enough someone finally constructed a bar around us. The day they opened&nbsp;Mikeyboy ordered&nbsp;two shots.&nbsp; He&nbsp;drank&nbsp;his and then burned the place to the ground.&nbsp;&nbsp;All the while, Mikeyboy yelled over the roaring flames: &quot;Always leave things the way you found them!'&quot;

[SatCam]

rumor has it mikeyboy is actually a...

http://ia.imdb.com/media/imdb/01/I/82/01/20/10m.jpg

[suggums]

<p>roflcopter smails, nice one</p><p>i heard mikeyboy even pulled off a feat that ron's been waiting his entire life to do:</p><p>rescue a child from a molester&nbsp;</p>

[sr71blackbird]

I once saw Mikeboy scale an icy utilty pole to rescue a trapped bear cub at the top.

[mdr55]

<p>i heard mikeyboy ate a sack of white castles and taco bell in the same day.</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>And nothing happened. That's a strong stomach.&nbsp;</p>

[Death Metal Moe]

<p>Mikeyboy can key a car with his penis.</p><p>Oh wait, that was Vin Diesel.&nbsp; Sorry.</p><p>Mikeyboy buys pre-stained polo shirts to save time.&nbsp; </p><p>He uses that saved time to edit all of our posts.</p>

[narc]

I heard Mikeyboy has to wear lead condoms, or else his boys will just bust right on through.

[FUNKMAN]

Mikeyboy can name any song in 1 note...

[PapaBear]

Mikeyboy&nbsp;got dates for&nbsp;Fonzie, while teaching Buddha how to chill the fuck out.

[Dirtybird12]

he can morph into pickles and vice versa

[Plethora]

<strong>CircusFreak</strong> wrote:<br />he can morph into pickles and vice versa<p>&nbsp;</p>Crazy Jen's Pickles?&nbsp; Ewww...<br />

[Dirtybird12]

yes jens pickles... but also green pickles.. ive seen him turn into a pickle

[Tall_James]

Hey, man, you don't talk to Mikeyboy. You listen to him. The man's enlarged my mind. He's a poet-warrior in the classic sense. I mean sometimes he'll... uh... well, you'll say &quot;hello&quot; to him, right? And he'll just walk right by you. He won't even notice you. And suddenly he'll grab you, and he'll throw you in a corner, and he'll say, &quot;do you know that 'if' is the middle word in life? If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you, if you can trust yourself when all men doubt you&quot;... I mean I'm no, I can't... I'm a little man, I'm a little man, he's... he's a great man. I should have been a pair of ragged claws scuttling across floors of silent seas... <br />

[Furtherman]

<p>How smart is Mikeyboy?</p><p>Ever hear of Plato?&nbsp; Socrates?</p><p>Morons.</p>

[bobrobot]

<p><strong><font color="#000099">The character of &quot;Studebaker Hawk&quot; in &quot;Billy the Mountain&quot;&nbsp;on the Mothers' album &quot;Just Another Band from L.A.,&quot; was based on Mikeyboy, even tho he was&nbsp;3 years old when it was written!!!</font></strong></p><p><img height="450" src="http://www.ohmladmusic.com/barrymore/Just-Another-Band-From-LA-b.jpg" width="449" border="0" /></p>

[Plethora]

<p class="MsoNormal">Mikeyboy saved everyone on Earth.&nbsp; Remember last Tuesday, when the Earth was
destroyed?&nbsp; And he saved everyone &amp;
brought us to this exact replica?&nbsp; Remember?&nbsp; He said that he would save everyone, but he couldn't
tell the stupid people because of the-- oh, errr, umm, nevermind.</p>

[mdr55]

mikeyboy invented ronfez.net<br />

[super turbo death shark]

mikeyboy can flick the lights on and off by using only a switch<br />

[suggums]

<p>&nbsp;</p><strong>Plethora</strong> wrote:<br /><strong>CircusFreak</strong> wrote:<br />he can morph into pickles and vice versa<p> </p>Crazy Jen's Pickles? Ewww...<br /><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>dont they kinda look like long lost brothers? i guess that means mikeyboy is related to crazy jen by law&nbsp;</p>

[furie]

i can see this becoming a chuck norris like thread

[Marc with a c]

<p>&nbsp;</p><strong>furie</strong> wrote:<br />i can see this becoming a chuck norris like thread<p>&nbsp;</p><p>mikeyboy knew that already.&nbsp;</p><blockquote /><p>&nbsp;</p>

[Hottub]

<p>Mikey WILL be at the game this Saturday! He will bring Ron, Fez, Earl, Dave and Johnny.</p><p>He will turn a single-handed double play while, updating the file library, billing 2 more clients, doing a keg stand, and lighting a cigar for Ron!!</p>

[FUNKMAN]

<p>Mikeyboy can make love twice in one day, he just needs 17 hours inbetween...</p><p>he knows i luvs e'm and think he's a funny guy....</p>

[bobrobot]

i can see this becoming a chuck norris like thread <p>&nbsp;</p><p><strong><font color="#000099">Mikeyboy wouldn't stoop to makin' &quot;Walker, Texas Ranger,&quot; he'd star in &quot;Walker, Texas Lawyer!!!&quot;</font></strong></p><p><img height="341" src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/0/0d/WalkerCast9399.jpg/250px-WalkerCast9399.jpg" width="250" border="0" /></p><p><strong><font color="#000099">Where is&nbsp;Chuck Norris'&nbsp;fuckin' dignity, standin' around in the hay??? </font></strong></p><p><strong><font color="#000099">&amp; when did Black Earl join the show???</font></strong></p>

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by bobogolem on 6-21-06 @ 11:57 PM</span>

[JustJon]

mikeyboy was the one who made John Mayer a fan of Ron and Fez.&nbsp; He travelled back in time, disguised himself as John's brother and played the bit about beating up 9 year olds for him.<br />

[Tenbatsuzen]

<p>I have found Mikeyboy's weakness:</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p><img width="219" height="284" border="0" src="http://www.office-beerbar.com/images/beers.jpg" />&nbsp;</p>

[Hottub]

<strong>Tenbatsuzen</strong> wrote:<br /><p>I have found Mikeyboy's weakness:</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p><img height="284" src="http://www.office-beerbar.com/images/beers.jpg" width="219" border="0" />&nbsp;</p><p>Actually, that is Kryptonite to about 3/4 of this board!</p>

[SatCam]

Mikeyboy's seamen is 90% cyanide and kills anyone who comes in contact with it. That would explain why no woman who has had sex with mikeyboy has been found.

[bobrobot]

<p><strong><font color="#000099">Mikeyboy cured my hemorrhoids w/ his own special &quot;cream,&quot; &amp; a somewhat painful applicator...</font></strong></p><p><img src="http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y46/bobogolem/PrepMb.jpg" border="0" /></p>

[blakjeezis]

Mikeyboy was born with both male and female genitalia. He chooses to use neither.

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by blakjeezis on 6-25-06 @ 7:15 PM</span>

[Fallon]

<p>&nbsp;</p><strong>STUGOTS1</strong> wrote:<br />i think he is really Superman. <p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>More like Bat<em>min</em>.&nbsp;</p>

[ADF]

Mikeyboy has the uncanny ability to guess whether a number you're thinking of is odd or even with 50% accuracy.<br />

[reeshy]

MikeyBoy is capable of performing a procotological exam without having to say &quot;No Homo&quot;!!!!!!<br />