Earl Douglas: Mr Perfect.

[SteveMKIIDub]

<p>This bit is the funniest shit yet. I hope this thread dosen't jinx it!</p><p>&quot;Dave, when Earl walks by I want you to look at your shoes!&quot;</p>

[Martin]

cue theme music:

http://st62.startlogic.com/~entertai/Forumpics/MrPerfect.jpg<img src='

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by Martin on 10-23-06 @ 1:09 PM</span>

[SinA]

what? i searched and there was already a thread



i think mr. perfect has shit the bed picking SC over LSU.

[Fezticle98]

what? i searched and there was already a thread

i think mr. perfect has shit the bed picking SC over LSU.

The straight up pick was crazy and Ron pressured him into it, but I like the +16.5.

I learned long ago to never doubt Mr. Perfect & always doubt Mr. Whatley.

[Kilgores Feet]

So far it doesn't look good for him.
While watching the game, I was listening to the replay. I may have missed the part where the Dane Cook song suddenly busts in on the show but it sounded like that mistake was edited out despite the commentary being left in.

[Annie Waits]

10 large on earls pick.

[Fezticle98]

The Gamecocks are driving, down by 18.

[Fezticle98]

Earl must be living right. That facemask saved him! Mr. Perfect!

[Team_Ramrod]

3:33 left in the 4th

Better hope to get in field goal range


EDIT:

1:41 Left.... Down by 12. Spread has been covered

[sailor]

3:33 left in the 4th

Better hope to get in field goal range


EDIT:

1:41 Left.... Down by 12. Spread has been covered

barring a kick return

[Team_Ramrod]

barring a kick return

Well Negative Nathan, the game is over now.

Streak is alive.

[sailor]

Well Negative Nathan, the game is over now.

Streak is alive.

not negative, i was just anxious for him to win.

[tcc_dc]

money in the bank with Earl....if he could just get that producing thing down :clap:

tcc

[cal5000]

why is it everyone here remembers that Earl originally said SC to cover and only then got goaded into picking them outright after ROn busted his balls, but Wackbag swears he fucked up.

The pick he told people to use was SC to cover and Earl personally thought they would win is how I took it.

[Kilgores Feet]

why is it everyone here remembers that Earl originally said SC to cover and only then got goaded into picking them outright after ROn busted his balls, but Wackbag swears he fucked up.

The pick he told people to use was SC to cover and Earl personally thought they would win is how I took it.

I remember that conversation. But I'm pretty sure since he said to "outright win" this would end the streak.
Of course, it is the only think Earl has going for him. And it is a good bit. So we should probably go ahead and accept his first response rather than his later statements.

[The Blowhard]

The last thing Earl should be doing is football picks, and even worse, picking winners. Don't you guys remember his meltdown when his streak ended last time?
I say no more picks for Earl, he should stick to memorizing album cover liner notes.
Just my two cents.

[TeeBone]

Picking against a huge spread in the SEC is not a difficult task, especially this season. Every game is close. Perfect????? Perhaps......
Still a stammering Dork who knows more about The Smiths than how to attract a woman???? Most assuredly.


Blowhard is the man and please add the L.A. TIMES to the list of potential boycotted newspapers.

-Teebone

[PapaBear]

Wouldn't Earl's picks, leading to another meltdown, be a good thing?

Set 'em up...

Knock 'em down.

Radio gold.

[danner1515]

Ouch, pretty early lose for Earl. At least last season's Boise State game was a couple of months in.

[PapaBear]

Ouch, pretty early lose for Earl. At least last season's Boise State game was a couple of months in.
I still don't see it as a loss for Earl. Yes... He did end up saying they'd win outright. But when it comes to the "Lock of the Week", it's all about betting. If you went with Earl, you won. It's all about the spread.

[Fallon]

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[cal5000]

The last thing Earl should be doing is football picks, and even worse, picking winners. Don't you guys remember his meltdown when his streak ended last time?
I say no more picks for Earl, he should stick to memorizing album cover liner notes.
Just my two cents.
Earl needs some kind of positive reinforcement. He had a strong streak last year--and alot of us made money off him.

Um Blowhard--how can the NYT love terrorists when they helped start the war?

[sailor]

earl won and it's silly to think otherwise.

[The Blowhard]

Earl needs some kind of positive reinforcement. He had a strong streak last year--and alot of us made money off him.

Um Blowhard--how can the NYT love terrorists when they helped start the war?

Taking the Iranian thug President to The Four Seasons for lunch on Monday proves my point. And also, FUCK COLUMBIA for letting this scumbag speak at their school, and yet the same school muzzled the leader of The Minutemen.
No let's back this thread back to Earl.

[Fezticle98]

Earl won. People will be calling in Monday and thanking him for winning them money. Anyone who bet the money line for South Carolina to win is a dummy.

As for picking games against the spread being "easy", only someone who doesn't get it would say that. Unless you have a system. Do you have a system? Or an 800 number?

[Chip Vaughn]

Black Earl...coming through

I must say I was on the business end of this bet, didn't think SC would cover here...but Mr. Perfect has done it again, does any body know about Fezzie's pick...The Lobos he picked as a jinx for that caller at the end of fridays show

[King Hippos Bandaid]

steaks are on me

Earl gets a 3 week reprieve of any insults from me

***If he loses next week, he is back in the Barrel ****

:king:

[TeeBone]

The system to picking spreads in the SEC is simple. More often than not, the favored team will not beat the spread, so logic would dictate that over time you will come out on top if you bet the favored team will not beat the spread. I've done this for the last couple of years and have done OK. (800) bet-SEC1.

On a side note, the more I hear The Blowhard speak or write, the more I like him. He's dead on with his take on Columbia University. But sorry, back to topic at hand........Earl is a joke but he is still 'Mr. Perfect,' and we can't take that away from him.

[Scottyflamingo]

Ode to Mr. Perfect

His name may be Earl Douglas, but its Mr. Perfect to all of you
Each week he picks his team, and its perfection through and through

In a sea of jynxes, he rises above them all
With losers like Cousin Oliver, whose Bucs will always fall

And then there’s East Side Dave, a loser I can tell ye
Instead of picking winners, he has sex with jars of jelly

The ham and eggers may be jealous, but he rises above all flack
He’s simply Mr. Perfect, and angel dressed in black

Each week he makes his pick, the piles of money just get bigger
He’s Earl Douglas, Mr. Perfect, the world’s most perfect…

picker.

[TeeBone]

The system to picking spreads in the SEC is simple. More often than not, the favored team will not beat the spread, so logic would dictate that over time you will come out on top if you bet the favored team will not beat the spread. I've done this for the last couple of years and have done OK. (800) bet-SEC1.

On a side note, the more I hear The Blowhard speak or write, the more I like him. He's dead on with his take on Columbia University. But sorry, back to topic at hand........Earl is a joke but he is still 'Mr. Perfect,' and we can't take that away from him.
--------------------------------
Maybe next time I'll use smaller words so that everyone can understand I was joking. Earl is many things, but he still is 'MR.PERFECT.'

[yomudder21]

i'm putting money on the Mr. Perfect pick this weekend.

[TheGreatWhite]

why is earl so afraid of white people?

[TeamBennington]

It is an insult to Mr. Perfect to assume that he relies on SEC underdogs...so this week, to prove every doubter wrong, he will switch conferences.... and take a different underdog.

The Mr. Perfect pick.....Illinois +3 at home against Penn State.

[Chip Vaughn]

Oh man...going to go against this one too...
I guess I'm with Fez again, gotta like Cal in this spot. Plus, the line is nowhere near 4.5 anymore the lowest I found it was at 5.5 and my book has got it at 6.5. I lost last night with Arkansas St. not covering the 4.5 (they won by 4). I am going to hold off, but really considering Cal, especially if South Florida hits tonight at +7.

:wink:

[Fezticle98]

Oh man...going to go against this one too...
I guess I'm with Fez again, gotta like Cal in this spot. Plus, the line is nowhere near 4.5 anymore the lowest I found it was at 5.5 and my book has got it at 6.5. I lost last night with Arkansas St. not covering the 4.5 (they won by 4). I am going to hold off, but really considering Cal, especially if South Florida hits tonight at +7.

:wink:

Why are you trying to analyze things? It's Mr. Perfect vs. Fez, end of story.

Before he made his pick, I was going with Cal. Not anymore. Do you not understand the meaning of "perfect"?

Why bother?

:wink: If this implied sarcasm on your part, I apologize.

[J.Clints]

Oregon Ducks over Cal. This week.

[MikeB]

Where the HELL did Earl get -4.5? Bodog has it at -6.5 right now. Are you telling me the spread moved two points in 12 hours. Earl must of been using a line from monday, which is BS.

[PapaBear]

Where the HELL did Earl get -4.5? Bodog has it at -6.5 right now. Are you telling me the spread moved two points in 12 hours. Earl must of been using a line from monday, which is BS.
This doesn't say the exact time that it became 6.5, but it sort of implies it's very recent.

From the San Francisco Chronicle...
As if bettors were learning a new piece of that information each day, the Las Vegas spread has consistently risen throughout the week. What started out as a projected 41/2-point advantage for Oregon became a 61/2-point spread by game day, with Cal playing the underdog role for the first time this season.

[MikeB]

This doesn't say the exact time that it became 6.5, but it sort of implies it's very recent.

From the San Francisco Chronicle...

Yea sounds like monday. Spread for this game wouldnt move in two different directions during the week.


This could make for an interesting Tuesday if Ducks only win by 5 or 6.

Just to cause more conflict to the show, my pick:

Ducks win 41-36

[KnoxHarrington]

Mr. Perfect is in serious trouble as I write this: early in the 4th, Cal's up 24-17.

And I was gonna use my winnings to buy myself something nice from Ronnie B's Sports Collectables.

[led37zep]

Mr. Perfect is in serious trouble as I write this: early in the 4th, Cal's up 24-17.

And I was gonna use my winnings to buy myself something nice from Ronnie B's Sports Collectables.

It is FAR from over.

[stinkbud]

24-24, ducks forcing a punt.....

Earl is sooo da man

EDIT: Interception, never mind

[Gvac]

California 31
Oregon 24


Way to go, Mr. Imperfect!

[TeeBone]

He had a great run. GREAT JOB, Earl !!!!!

[pmoney316]

I feel bad for the guy who put all his savings to adopt a baby on Earl's pick.

Earl has now moved to the top of the 'Ron and Fez cleaning house' list in my opinion.

[gerabuu]

sleeps with the fishes.

[lleeder]

Well at least he still has that job on Unmasked...oh he doesn't...well at least he has the staff's respect...oh he doesn't

[MikeB]

Wasnt that great of a run. He lost that game late last year.


Stay away from west coast games!!!! Lost the Boise State game against San Diego State (or was it San Jose) and now this.

[led37zep]

Well that sucked.

[CJJames]

On behalf of all Nevadans, thank you, Earl. When the betters lose, the books win, and so do my fellow citizens and I in the Silver State. KEEP PICKIN' EARL! BUILD THAT TRUST BACK UP WITH THE RUBES!!! It helps to keep us from having a state income tax :clap:

[lleeder]

On behalf of all Nevadans, thank you, Earl. When the betters lose, the books win, and so do my fellow citizens and I in the Silver State. KEEP PICKIN' EARL! BUILD THAT TRUST BACK UP WITH THE RUBES!!! It helps to keep us from having a state income tax :clap:

Yeah cause everyone flew to Vegas to place those bets :wink:

[Chip Vaughn]

On behalf of all Nevadans, thank you, Earl. When the betters lose, the books win, and so do my fellow citizens and I in the Silver State. KEEP PICKIN' EARL! BUILD THAT TRUST BACK UP WITH THE RUBES!!! It helps to keep us from having a state income tax :clap:

:wink: Casinos just want 50% of the action on each side...always! They win either way...

[CJJames]

Yeah cause everyone flew to Vegas to place those bets :wink:

You'd be surprised how many people bet over the phone, my brother :wink:

[CJJames]

:wink: Casinos just want 50% of the action on each side...always! They win either way...


Actually, since sports betting is so huge, casinos are fine with wanting as much profit as they can get. They don't have to convince people who bet on college football that there is a chance they might win-they already know that. Table games and slots arouse much more suspicion because the gambler believes they are much more susceptible to fraud.

[Gvac]

You guys are all missing the most important thing - Ronnie's kids can't go to college. :down:

[FezPaul]

You guys are all missing the most important thing - Ronnie's kids can't go to college. :down:

Does this mean Earl is fired?

[Chip Vaughn]

CJ,

I'm just talking about sportsbooks in general, or bookies. They want 50% of all money on each side to maximize profit and lessen risk. They collect money from the losers, pay out the winners and keep the vig. or juice. This is how a sportsbook or bookies operate, they win either way...

/It is a true shame about Ronnie's kids though, maybe he'll double down next week. Oh and someone mentioned it earlier too, I feel bad for that poor African boy that was going to be adopted

:glurps:

[King Hippos Bandaid]

I would be checking the East Eiver for the Remians of Earl

:king:

[silas]

You guys are all missing the most important thing - Ronnie's kids can't go to college. :down:

Maybe, just maybe; we will hear Ron give Earl heck.

Almost as funny as that one time when Charlie Brown trusted Lucy to not move away the football.

[CJJames]

CJ,

I'm just talking about sportsbooks in general, or bookies. They want 50% of all money on each side to maximize profit and lessen risk. [FONT=Tahoma][SIZE=2][COLOR=Black]They collect money from the losers, pay out the winners and keep the vig. or juice. This is how a sportsbook or bookies operate, they win either way...

:glurps:


Actually, you quoted what I wrote about gaming in Nevada, which wasn't about sports books or bookies in general. If you're writing about your experience with gaming outside of Nevada, then thats a seperate topic and thats cool. When it comes to Vegas, though, we just want gamblers to bet as much as possible and lose as much as possible, because no matter how much is paid out, more keep coming to bet over the phone, in person, or eventually over the computer. Gamblers don't consider Vegas an investment opportunity and Casino owners don't have to worry about gamblers going elsewhere like a local bookie might. AC didn't hurt Vegas and neither did the Internet. Heck, we even recovered from 9/11 after a year, and we depend on planes to get most of our gamblers in and out of town. We don't need to worry that not enough is being paid out because they just keep coming. In fact, so many keep coming that we're building the second Strip in Macau with Wynn Macau and Venetian Macau. As Ronnie keeps saying, Carnies and Rubes. :smoke:

[CJJames]

Maybe, just maybe; we will hear Ron give Earl heck.

Almost as funny as that one time when Charlie Brown trusted Lucy to not move away the football.

I'm counting on it. Earl getting bashed = Radio Gold.:devil2:

[Caseyelan]

Does this mean Earl is fired?

No it just means Earl can't say "without question" for 14 days.

[silas]

I'm counting on it. Earl getting bashed = Radio Gold.:devil2:


Yeah, Mr.B's ball-bustin' tirades are always top-notch.

I guess i just wouldn't mind if that incredible talent wasn't used more often for more interesting issues.....I luv it when he goes off on real targets

[spankyfrank]

I have a feeling there is going to be cleaning house this week. Ronnie just gong to go helter skelter in the studio on tuesday.

[MadMatt]

Does this mean Earl is fired?

Oh please, oh please, oh please, oh please...

http://images.dmusic.com/v7/emoticons/pray.gif

[MikeB]

Ronnie just gong to go helter skelter in the studio on tuesday.
Earl doesnt know how to take a cue so I doubt it.

[Detroit454]

Oh please, oh please, oh please, oh please...

http://images.dmusic.com/v7/emoticons/pray.gif

X2 Earl sux!

[MikeB]

It is safe to say The Ron and Fez Show is home to the worst gamblers in the world.

[dieBeforeXmas]

i met this chick, no joke, and she loves the blues right. on sept 28 the ron and fez show played this interesting blues tune in their opening and i had this feeling that if i play this song to this chick she would love it and give me sex. im serious. if there is anybody out there that knows the artist and the track name PLEASE HELP ME! i do believe that i will get sex from this chick anyway but i think this could be special, and i want to treat this chick with respect. thanks....:help:

[HeyGehry]

Haven't had a chance to listen to the show for 4 days...does Earl have a pick this week? Thanks.

[TeeBone]

OSU, and the Dipshit thought they were +7.

[HeyGehry]

Thanks, budday.

[HeyGehry]

OSU, and the Dipshit thought they were +7.


I just realized there are 3 OSU's. Which one...Oklahoma?

[TeeBone]

Buckeyes

[MikeB]

Earl only takes a loss when the game is not on regional coverage in NYC. I am pretty sure the game last week wasnt and I KNOW the boise state game last year wasnt.

[KnoxHarrington]

And once again the ham n eggers that doubt Mr. Perfect are left broke, while those of us who ride with him are rolling in fat cash.

[cal5000]

The man is retarded but he picks winnahs.

Hes touched by the hand of god....

[epo]

Earl's overall record must be amazing at this point. Seriously he's only lost twice and this gimmick has been going on forever.

[tcc_dc]

Earl keeps earning money......don't doubt...he knows (ie somehow) his picks....

thank you Earl for the addition on the house...

tcc

[TeeBone]

Say what you will: “Earl is a dumb-ass, Earl is retarded, Earl answers with the word ‘NO’ to every question, Earl is gay, Earl is incapable of managing people, Earl is incapable of managing his own life, Earl very well might have female reproductive parts, Earl is a ‘yes-man,’ Earl has little to do with the production of the show.”
All of those things may or may not be true------Who really knows? What we do know is that the man can make picks regardless if he knows if his team is favored or not or at home or away.

Mr. Perfect, Earl Douglas.

Respect the picks.

[Snoogans]

how are you gonna keep calling someone Mr. Perfect when they have 2 losses?

That isn't perfect. I'm not sayin he is bad and don't give him credit, he has a great record, but he isn't perfect

[epo]

how are you gonna keep calling someone Mr. Perfect when they have 2 losses?

That isn't perfect. I'm not sayin he is bad and don't give him credit, he has a great record, but he isn't perfect

I'm not questioning a man who has provided me with enough $$$ to purchase my very own Golden Diamond.

[cal5000]

how are you gonna keep calling someone Mr. Perfect when they have 2 losses?

That isn't perfect. I'm not sayin he is bad and don't give him credit, he has a great record, but he isn't perfect

Because theres not even a professional commentator or odds maker who can say that he has a better record than Mr. Perfect.

Compared to most hes pratically perfect.

[midwestjeff]

Mr. Practically Perfect? I like it.

[Snoogans]

Because theres not even a professional commentator or odds maker who can say that he has a better record than Mr. Perfect.

Compared to most hes pratically perfect.

because they pick way more then one game each week. They usually pick them all in college and pro. Thats why

[MadMatt]

[QUOTE=TeeBone;1480973]Say what you will: “Earl is a dumb-ass, Earl is retarded, Earl answers with the word ‘NO’ to every question, Earl is gay, Earl is incapable of managing people, Earl is incapable of managing his own life, Earl very well might have female reproductive parts, Earl is a ‘yes-man,’ Earl has little to do with the production of the show.” QUOTE]

May I borrow this for my Mod Quote?

[BoondockSaint]

because they pick way more then one game each week. They usually pick them all in college and pro. Thats why


So, they're not smart enough to concentrate on one game like Earl? Chalk up another brilliant move to Mr. Perfect!

[JPMNICK]

I think most sports fans could go 80% on the season picking 1 game per week.

[TeeBone]

[QUOTE=TeeBone;1480973]Say what you will: “Earl is a dumb-ass, Earl is retarded, Earl answers with the word ‘NO’ to every question, Earl is gay, Earl is incapable of managing people, Earl is incapable of managing his own life, Earl very well might have female reproductive parts, Earl is a ‘yes-man,’ Earl has little to do with the production of the show.” QUOTE]

May I borrow this for my Mod Quote?

YOU MAY

[sailor]

i don't know about tthe 80% picking one game gimmick. the lines are manipulated so half the money goes on one team, half on the other. for all the gamblers as a whole, it's a coin flip. are some better? obviously. are some at 80% or better? most definitely. would everyone hit 80% picking just one game? i don't see how that's possible. heck, just look at bill simmons from espn. i LOVE that he puts himself out there as a great gambling expert, has all this in depth game knowledge, breaks everything down, ridicule people for not having the knowledge he does...and barely hits 50%. AND, his wife beat him last year, pick-for-pick. and she bases her decisions on things like "i think peyton's cute" or "i have a friend who lives in cincy." she's currently 4 games up on him after 3 weeks.

[JPMNICK]

i don't know about tthe 80% picking one game gimmick. the lines are manipulated so half the money goes on one team, half on the other. for all the gamblers as a whole, it's a coin flip. are some better? obviously. are some at 80% or better? most definitely. would everyone hit 80% picking just one game? i don't see how that's possible. heck, just look at bill simmons from espn. i LOVE that he puts himself out there as a great gambling expert, has all this in depth game knowledge, breaks everything down, ridicule people for not having the knowledge he does...and barely hits 50%. AND, his wife beat him last year, pick-for-pick. and she bases her decisions on things like "i think peyton's cute" or "i have a friend who lives in cincy." she's currently 4 games up on him after 3 weeks.

if you look at all the college and pro games, to find one lock I think it can happen. i do not consider myself a massive fan, just casual, and in the rf.net surivor pool i have picked 5 or 6 in a row. at the same time, when i pick the whole weeks worth of games, I am much closer to .500, which as you said makes sense due to the lines. but there is always that one game that just seems off. maybe that is crazy gambler talk.

in college, i used to gamble on football all the time. i was picking 3-4 games per week for a while, and then i decided to do the 1 game per week and regardless of outcome, not bet another, and I was running at about 75-80 over the seasons that i used this strategy, which is where i got that number from.

[RFrockthehouse]

Did he make one for this weekend? Thanks

[watson]

thanks Earl!!!!

[Fezticle98]

Push for Mr. Douglas.

At tie is like kissing your sister. Which, incidentally, Earl is very into.

[lleeder]

Push for Mr. Douglas.

At tie is like kissing your sister. Which, incidentally, Earl is very into.

Not as much as kissing his brother...

[deliciousV]

I know the line was 4 today, but I can't remember, was it 4 on friday when Earl made the pick?

[Fezticle98]

I know the line was 4 today, but I can't remember, was it 4 on friday when Earl made the pick?

I believe so. In the past, he's lied to put the line in his favor by a point or 2, but I seem to remember -4.

[MikeB]

Who wants to bet Earl thinks he still won.