Does Criticism Bother You? [Archive] - RonFez.net Messageboard

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Gvac

11-03-2006, 05:33 PM

I mean do you really take it to heart?  Can the harsh words of someone cut you inside?  I started thinking about this after the little pow-wow on the Ron and Fez show this past Thursday.  Dave and Fez admitted that they were deeply affected by the jabs from their critics on various messageboards.  Obviously, not many of us have to deal with people evaluating us on the scale radio personalities and celebrities do, but do you find it tough to listen to other people having an unfavorable opinion about you?

ShelleBink

11-03-2006, 05:37 PM

I think I'm my own worst critic, and I found it to be true more and more when being peer reviewed on various projects I've produced.  I don't take negative criticism ((from others)) to heart as often as I once did, and I often listen to the valid points people bring up to make what I do better.  I've found that as long as I'm happy with what I put forward, then I really don't mind how people perceive it.

spoon

11-03-2006, 05:38 PM

Nope, not at all.  I challenge it to be truthful.  If it sticks make adjustments and thank them.

FezPaul

11-03-2006, 05:39 PM

It depends on whether or not I respect the opinion of the person saying it.Or if they're hitting a personal "soft spot".Or if it's unjustified and I don't have the chance to state my side of the issue.

TheMojoPin

11-03-2006, 05:57 PM

I'd like to think that I usually just listen and take it gracefully, but I know that more than often I overreact or take it the wrong way.  I guess I don't want people just harping on me or taking things I said wrong, but I'd hate it even more if people weren't at least attempting to be honest to my face.Now I feel kinda bad for my "Fez is awful" gimmick lately.

ADF

11-03-2006, 06:02 PM

I prefer to think that everything's going great.  It ruins my entire day to find out otherwise.

Don Stugots

11-03-2006, 06:05 PM

i hate criticism in all its forms.  just tell me "hey, here is another way to do it next time."  or just fire me.  i obsess over things and unkind words stick in my head until i cant sleep from it and make myself sick.

ChrisTheCop

11-03-2006, 07:10 PM

I'm not perfect, but I'm a perfectionist. Whatever I do, I try to do it to the VERY best of my ability. I give 100%. And yes, when criticized (usually by someone who knows nothing about my job, like my boss), it does hurt. And I take it personally.I can understand how the boys feel reading certain things on here.

Gaia

11-03-2006, 07:12 PM

I feel I am my worst critic as well; however I hate criticism. I take it to heart, and it hurts my feelings. I am way too sensative, and it's sort of a problem. I'm trying to work on it, but at least I know its a weakness.

UnknownPD

11-03-2006, 07:32 PM

It depends on the criticizer. Most people can say stuff to me and it has no effect, but if certain people do it I can't get it out of my head. The worst part is other than my mother their is no rhyme or reason to whom or why I care. Could be anyone.

El Mudo

11-03-2006, 07:36 PM

Only if I feel its unfounded...like if I get blamed for something
that I obviously can't control.  I have a pretty good sense of
right/wrong, and I know when I cross the line, because I usually plan
to. But other than that, it doesn't really bother
me.  In fact, sometimes I see it as something good, especially
when it comes to things like my writing or other ways in which I
express myself creatively, because I get a sense of how other people
perceive it and whatnot.  It helps me to become a better writer in
that sense.

ChrisTheCop

11-03-2006, 07:37 PM

What kind of post was that, Unknownpd? Bad grammar, at least one spelling error (a COMMON one at that! their, there, theyre), and to top it off, no friggin SIGPIC??? That was just an awful awful post. I hope  you can do better in the future.        (get it?)

Ogre

11-03-2006, 07:45 PM

God yes.  I must say that I take alot personally.  I have always felt that I dwell on the couple things wrong instead of focusing on what was done right.  I have alot of self doubt and try to overcompensate with a tough guy mentality.  I guess deep down inside I am just a little kid that is afraid of being exposed in front of my peers.  I know that this is probably not right to think this way but I often do.  Just being honest.

FUNKMAN

11-03-2006, 07:53 PM

i find it interesting that you started a topic but did not even answer your own question??i will be honest and say some criticism bugs me and some does not. i guess it matters 'when' it's said and 'how' it's said. you can tell if someone is being constructive or just looking to insult you...

Fez4PrezN2008

11-03-2006, 07:54 PM

According to ESD I am not worthy of criticism nor should you be concerned if it bothers me since I am a noob.... Thanks ESD !

foodcourtdruide

11-03-2006, 07:58 PM

I think it depends on where the criticism comes from.For example, I run a group of 5. If any of my people criticize me I'd discuss it with them, and ultimately reject their criticism (unless it's valid, then I'd beat myself up).However, if MY supervisors criticized me I'd welt up like Dave when Ron criticizes him.

Gvac

11-03-2006, 08:16 PM

FUNKMAN wrote: i find it interesting that you started a topic but did not even answer your own question?? I have no idea whether it would bother me or not.I've never been criticized.  <img border="0" src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/tiny_mce/plugins/emotions/images/smoke.gif" /> To be completely honest, though, I think it's probably something that comes with age.  At this point in my life I truly don't give a rat's ass what anyone says or thinks about me.  I know I'm wonderful.

PapaBear

11-03-2006, 11:23 PM

When someone criticizes me, and they are right, it bothers me at first. When I realise they are right, I'm grateful for the input. When someone criticizes me, and they are wrong, it bothers me. When it bothers me, it's usually for a short period of time. There are rare cases when I dwell on it.

WhistlePig

11-04-2006, 02:46 AM

Ogre wrote: God yes.ÿ I must say that I
take alot personally.ÿ I have always felt that I dwell on the couple things
wrong instead of focusing on what was done right.ÿ I have alot of self doubt
and try to overcompensate with a tough guy mentality.ÿ I guess deep down
inside I am just a little kid that is afraid of being exposed in front of my
peers.ÿ I know that this is probably not right to think this way but I often
do.ÿ Just being honest.

I'm the same way, Ogre, except for the tough guy part. My first reaction is
to be defensive, which shows the criticizer they are right= I am worthless/
an idiot/stupid which is exactly what I don't want them to find out.

Bulldogcakes

11-04-2006, 04:03 AM

Ogre wrote: God yes. I must say that I take alot personally. I have always felt that I dwell on the couple things wrong instead of focusing on what was done right. I have alot of self doubt and try to overcompensate with a tough guy mentality. I guess deep down inside I am just a little kid that is afraid of being exposed in front of my peers. I know that this is probably not right to think this way but I often do. Just being honest. Damn, for a guy with a restaurant you are destined to be a tortured soul. Did you ever take any hospitality classes? If not, you should check into it, and avoid alot of future ulcers. The trick is to have an answer of some sort, a way of dealing with it. And to understand where its coming from and where you fit in the marketplace. Whatever answer you come up with wont be perfect (nothing is) but if it works more often than not, go with it.  In my business I'm extremely sensitive to criticism, but thats a good thing. I'll immediately go check the complaint for accuracy and (if true) deal with it immediately. It also can be a way of finding out what you need to do better. There's an old saying "A good businessman WANTS to hear complaints" and people who are very successful (Bill Gates comes to mind) are mostly interested in whats not going right to deal with it and try to solve it. The good stuff takes care of itself, its the problems that need your attention. <blockquote />   Personally I'm not very sensitive at all. I know who I am and where i fit in on this planet. People dont like me, their loss.

OGC

11-04-2006, 04:32 AM

Gvac wrote: To be completely honest, though, I think it's probably something that comes with age.  At this point in my life I truly don't give a rat's ass what anyone says or thinks about me.  I know I'm wonderful. I agree with this completely. When I was younger I would obsess over the slightest criticism.Now I listen politely and if I feel that the criticism is valid I will take it to heart, but most of the time I shrug it off and continue on my merry old way.

sr71blackbird

11-04-2006, 01:21 PM

God yes! I work in an office that is 98% menopausal women, and they are known to having hair triggers on herassment charges.  They cut me up on a daily basis, they bad mouth me within ear shot of me and there is not a God damn thing that can be done about it but to just sit there and take it.  They are hyper critical on anything they choose to be critical on, and woe is he that becomes the focus of whatever strikes their fancy for the criticism du jour.

A.J.

11-06-2006, 04:08 AM

Only from my sexual partners.

grlNIN

11-06-2006, 06:16 AM

It depends on who it's coming from. If it's someone i work with or a friend then i usually take it wel but coming  from someone closer, then i tend to become defensive and get upset, i automatically take it as a personal attack or jab for some reason.

CofyCrakCocaine

11-06-2006, 06:25 AM

I have to admit that all criticism bothers me. I should have tougher skin, but that's the damn truth. I have two different reactions to criticism. If it's coming from someone who doesn't know me, or whom I don't care about, then it just annoys me and, if it catches me on a bad day, actually makes me mad for five minutes to an hour initiating vindictive 'I'll kick your ass' mode. If it comes from someone I care about or whose opinion I respect, then it makes me feel bad about myself and I wind up feeling like shit when I remember such things even years after the fact. I do my best to repent, and I think feeling like shit is some psychological mechanism that helps me enforce not repeating whatever I did that initiated the criticism. I'd be a horrible politician. Mmm. A big steaming mug o' insecurity, anyone?

Death Metal Moe

11-06-2006, 06:47 AM

grlNIN wrote: It depends on who it's coming from. If it's someone i work with or a friend then i usually take it wel but coming  from someone closer, then i tend to become defensive and get upset, i automatically take it as a personal attack or jab for some reason. Yea, that's about right for me too.  Being an adult is not caring what others think of you and doing what you feel is right.  But when criticism comes from someone closer to you, you know they know you better and you will usually think about it.But there is a difference between "Not caring what people think" and "People speaking untruths about you."  Then, you will make sure that the person is corrected.I think the messageboards really run the risk of just not being included in the show as much anymore if the drama, bullshit and overall negative garbage keeps up.

Jujubees2

11-06-2006, 07:00 AM

In my profession, a lot of what I do is available to the public and, for better or worse, to the alumni of the school.  When I get criticized anonymously on a message board I used to let it bother me but now I just brush it off.  I figure if the person doesn't have the intestinal fortitude to call/email me directly with the criticism; it's not worth my time.  However, if they do call/email then I listen and see if the complaint is valid.  When I give criticism I prefer to make it constructive criticism.

lleeder

11-06-2006, 01:09 PM

It bothers me because I'm so paranoid that when someone critizes me I start thinking " I wonder how long that was building up?" or "Does everyone think that but they are too nice to say?". Its the main reason I have few friends or people I let get close to me.

terry1979

11-06-2006, 01:23 PM

I don't mind constructive criticism from friends or co-workers...but the shit I don't like are the people who thinkit's ok to point shit out to you.  For instance, I went to buy pizza from a place I used to work for throughout high school and summers in college.  I go in there and the boss sees me and in his Italian f-ing accent yells out "What's up Terry?  Looks like I'm not the only won gaining all this weight."  This is in front of a store full of people.  Mind you I was 155 last tme I saw him and I am pushing 175 now, but I haven't seen him in like 6 years....since I was 20 or 21.  Who are theses people who think it is ok to say shit like that???

SatCam

11-06-2006, 04:04 PM

Does Criticism Bother You?

only when it has to do with my appearence. then I get really self-conscience.

if it has to do with my work, then I'll try and see if they have a valid point--if yes, I'll improve, if not, I'll ignore

zildjian361

11-06-2006, 04:28 PM

Ive never been critizied either <img height="26" src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/tiny_mce/plugins/emotions/images/smoke.gif" width="48" border="0" />