How do you catch a dog? [Archive] - RonFez.net Messageboard

View Full Version : How do you catch a dog?

SinA

01-25-2007, 09:13 AM

There is a stray dog in the woods behind my neighborhood that gets into everyone's trash and scatters it all over the place.  I've seen the dog a few times... it's a full grown black and white Great Dane.  I honestly thought it was a cow.  I called the local animal control dept. and the came and set out a baited cage for a while but their largest cage was too small.  So they gave up, but I'd still like to get the dog:1. because I don't want to have to keep cleaning up the trash, it takes full bags out of the dumpster and drags them all over the woods.2. eventually it's going to get hit by a car or get sick eating trash.I'd like to get it and take it to the ASPCA and get it checked out.  If someone lost it (I didn't see a lost GD ad in the paper), maybe they'll get it back.  If it's truly homeless I'll bring it home, I won't let it get euthanized.But how would I catch it?  It's used to getting chased away from yards for so long that it runs away whenever I get close to it.  Maybe the Oracle has an idea....and before you say it, I haven't tried bacon yet.

EliSnow

01-25-2007, 09:16 AM

This other great dane I've heard loves this thing called "Scooby Snacks."

Earlshog

01-25-2007, 09:18 AM

SinA wrote: There is a stray dog in the woods behind my neighborhood that gets into everyone's trash and scatters it all over the place.  I've seen the dog a few times... it's a full grown black and white Great Dane.  I honestly thought it was a cow.  I called the local animal control dept. and the came and set out a baited cage for a while but their largest cage was too small.  So they gave up, but I'd still like to get the dog: 1.  I SinA have also fucked a dog 2. because I don't want to have to keep cleaning up the trash, it takes full bags out of the dumpster and drags them all over the woods.3. eventually it's going to get hit by a car or get sick eating trash.I'd like to get it and take it to the ASPCA and get it checked out.  If someone lost it (I didn't see a lost GD ad in the paper), maybe they'll get it back.  If it's truly homeless I'll bring it home, I won't let it get euthanized.But how would I catch it?  It's used to getting chased away from yards for so long that it runs away whenever I get close to it.  Maybe the Oracle has an idea....and before you say it, I haven't tried bacon yet.fixed

jeffdwright2001

01-25-2007, 09:25 AM

SinA wrote:  it's a full grown black and white Great Dane.  I don't think he's all that great and I didn't know he was of mixed heritage, but I think you can catch him on Myspace.<img src="http://www.orlandoimprov.com/comics/cookd.jpg" border="0" width="250" height="376" />

Dougie Brootal

01-25-2007, 09:35 AM

<table border="0" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="2" width="100%"><tbody><tr width="50" bgcolor="#ffffff"><td align="center" bgcolor="#3175bd">Author</td><td bgcolor="#3175bd">Discussion Topic: How do you catch a dog? </td><td valign="top" bgcolor="#3175bd"><a href="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/printthread.cfm/Forum/69/Topic/56147" target="_blank"><img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/images/printthread.gif" border="0" alt="Printer-friendly Version" width="18" height="17" align="middle" /></a>  <a href="javascript:PopWin('http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/emailthread.cfm/Forum/69/Topic/56147',%20'400',%20'300');"><img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/images/emailthread.gif" border="0" alt="send this discussion to a friend" width="16" height="17" align="middle" /></a>  </td></tr><tr bgcolor="#ffffff"><td valign="middle" bgcolor="#adcad9"><div style="padding-left: 5px">SinA</div></td><td colspan="2" valign="top" bgcolor="#adcad9"><table border="0" width="100%"><tbody><tr><td><img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/images/topicicons/topic.gif" border="0" width="15" height="15" /> 01-25-2007 @ 1:13 PM                          </td><td align="right"><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><a href="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/replytotopic.cfm/Forum/69/Topic/56147/currentpage/1"><img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/images/message_reply.gif" border="0" alt="Reply To Topic" width="59" height="18" align="bottom" /></a></td><td valign="top"><a href="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/replytotopic.cfm/Forum/69/Topic/56147/currentpage/1/messageid/1148077" title="quote this topic"><img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/images/quotepost.gif" border="0" alt="Quote this Post" width="59" height="18" align="bottom" /></a></td><td valign="top"><a href="javascript:PopWin('http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/whois.cfm?MemID=23572', '400', '450')" title="view SinA's profile"><img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/images/profile.gif" border="0" alt="View Profile" width="59" height="18" align="bottom" /></a></td><td valign="top"><a href="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/inbox.cfm/rid/23572" title="Send a private message to SinA"><img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/images/sendpm.gif" border="0" alt="Send Private Message" width="59" height="18" align="bottom" /></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr bgcolor="#ffffff"><td width="110" valign="top" bgcolor="#ffffff"><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="100%"><tbody><tr><td> </td></tr><tr><td>I SinA have also fucked a dog</td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table>    hmmmm?

Skellington

01-25-2007, 09:54 AM

open a jar of jelly/peanutbutter, unzip your pants...... oh oh OH! Food and a hoop leash.  Good stinky food *like wet dog food*, and a hoop leash *so you have a large "O" to throw over the dogs head, then if it runs, it tightens.* MAGDRL is a honest to goodness wonderful rescue.  Contact them, they will help you or send info.  <a href="http://www.magdrl.org/">http://www.magdrl.org/</a> Good luck, they are really sweet lap dogs.

angrymissy

01-25-2007, 10:02 AM

This is a Great Dane Rescue group, I bet they could help (and help place the dog as well)http://www.nydanerescue.com/

Enabler

01-25-2007, 10:15 AM

Hunting feral dogs can be a dangerous proposition. Be careful buddy.

Don Stugots

01-25-2007, 10:15 AM

to catch a dog:<ul><li>get yourself drunk</li><li>tell her how hot she really is</li><li>tell her you can see yourself falling for her</li><li>get her nice and drunk </li><li>insert penis</li></ul>

Sheeplovr

01-25-2007, 10:17 AM

Who let the dog out?

A.J.

01-25-2007, 10:17 AM

Call in a Korean.

jeffdwright2001

01-25-2007, 10:22 AM

Don Stugots wrote: to catch a dog:<ul><li>get yourself drunk</li><li>tell her how hot she really is</li><li>tell her you can see yourself falling for her</li><li>get her nice and drunk </li><li>insert penis</li></ul>  Have you found that this works on all breeds or just Great Danes?

Fezticle98

01-25-2007, 10:29 AM

Can't help ya. If you need to catch a seagull, let me know.

undressa

01-25-2007, 10:38 AM

How about some hot sauce on your asshole? v

Wallower

01-25-2007, 11:08 AM

jeffdwright2001 wrote: SinA wrote: it's a full grown black and white Great Dane. I don't think he's all that great and I didn't know he was of mixed heritage, but I think you can catch him on Myspace.<img src="http://www.orlandoimprov.com/comics/cookd.jpg" border="0" width="250" height="376" /> He looks like he peed himself.

Snacks

01-25-2007, 11:13 AM

if its that big, hire a cowboy to rope'm. What are you going to do if hes healthy and has no owner? keep him?

ralphbxny

01-25-2007, 12:11 PM

Penut butter

EliSnow

01-25-2007, 12:15 PM

jeffdwright2001 wrote: Don Stugots wrote: to catch a dog:<ul><li>get yourself drunk</li><li>tell her how hot she really is</li><li>tell her you can see yourself falling for her</li><li>get her nice and drunk </li><li>insert penis</li></ul>  Have you found that this works on all breeds or just Great Danes?  I've found it works best on the New Jersey Bighaired breeds.

TheVHD

01-25-2007, 12:25 PM

EliSnow wrote: jeffdwright2001 wrote: Don Stugots wrote: to catch a dog:<ul><li>get yourself drunk</li><li>tell her how hot she really is</li><li>tell her you can see yourself falling for her</li><li>get her nice and drunk </li><li>insert penis</li></ul>  Have you found that this works on all breeds or just Great Danes?  I've found it works best on the New Jersey Bighaired breeds.  For that breed be sure to add how your cousin knows Bon Jovi and can get backstage passes for his next show.

SinA

01-25-2007, 12:35 PM

fagenabler wrote: Hunting feral dogs can be a dangerous proposition. Be careful buddy. it is a damn big dog too.

torker

01-25-2007, 12:36 PM

<img src="http://jvsworld.com/Media/Images/assets/bg_doghouse.jpg" border="0" width="516" height="164" />   Catch 'The Doghouse'    9 - 11 on FREE-FM!!!what?

nate1000

01-25-2007, 12:47 PM

douggrasso wrote: <table border="0" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="2" width="100%"><tbody><tr width="50" bgcolor="#ffffff"><td align="center" bgcolor="#3175bd">Author</td><td bgcolor="#3175bd">Discussion Topic: How do you catch a dog? </td><td valign="top" bgcolor="#3175bd"><a href="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/printthread.cfm/Forum/69/Topic/56147" target="_blank"><img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/images/printthread.gif" border="0" alt="Printer-friendly Version" width="18" height="17" align="middle" /></a>  <a href="*PopWin('http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/emailthread.cfm/Forum/69/Topic/56147',%20'400',%20'300');"><img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/images/emailthread.gif" border="0" alt="send this discussion to a friend" width="16" height="17" align="middle" /></a>  </td></tr><tr bgcolor="#ffffff"><td valign="middle" bgcolor="#adcad9">* style="padding-left: 5px">SinA </td><td colspan="2" valign="top" bgcolor="#adcad9"><table border="0" width="100%"><tbody><tr><td><img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/images/topicicons/topic.gif" border="0" width="15" height="15" /> 01-25-2007 @ 1:13 PM                          </td><td align="right"><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><a href="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/replytotopic.cfm/Forum/69/Topic/56147/currentpage/1"><img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/images/message_reply.gif" border="0" alt="Reply To Topic" width="59" height="18" align="bottom" /></a></td><td valign="top">*-- includes/dsp_messagenav.cfm -*<a href="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/replytotopic.cfm/Forum/69/Topic/56147/currentpage/1/messageid/1148077" title="quote this topic"><img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/images/quotepost.gif" border="0" alt="Quote this Post" width="59" height="18" align="bottom" /></a></td><td valign="top"><a href="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/replytotopic.cfm/Forum/69/Topic/56147/currentpage/1/messageid/*PopWin('http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/whois.cfm?MemID=23572', '400', '450')" title="view SinA's profile"><img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/images/profile.gif" border="0" alt="View Profile" width="59" height="18" align="bottom" /></a></td><td valign="top"><a href="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/inbox.cfm/rid/23572" title="Send a private message to SinA"><img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/images/sendpm.gif" border="0" alt="Send Private Message" width="59" height="18" align="bottom" /></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr bgcolor="#ffffff"><td width="110" valign="top" bgcolor="#ffffff"><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" width="100%"><tbody><tr><td> </td></tr><tr><td>I SinA have also fucked a dog</td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table>    hmmmm?<img src="http://img296.imageshack.us/img296/1613/orlyhippolu67dv.gif" border="0" width="351" height="267" />

moochcassidy

01-25-2007, 12:51 PM

i grab a dog.and...and i choke him....thats my pleasurrrrrrrah

angelinad128

01-25-2007, 12:52 PM

torker wrote:  <img src="http://jvsworld.com/Media/Images/assets/bg_doghouse.jpg" border="0" width="516" height="164" />   Catch 'The Doghouse'    9 - 11 on FREE-FM!!!what?There are three guys now?

lleeder

01-25-2007, 12:55 PM

Sheeplovr wrote: Who let the dog out? Who Who Who..Who Who?

Bulldogcakes

01-25-2007, 03:36 PM

Just scream out "HEY!! WHO WANTS A TREAT? TREAT TREAT TREAT!!!"If that does work, try "Wanna go for a walk? WALK!" Should come running.

Kevin

01-25-2007, 03:38 PM

Sheeplovr wrote: Who let the dog out? Come on Sheepy... You gave me those minus 300 points for my obvious do you know the way to San Jose Joke to melly.... This was just as obvious...

Chigworthy

01-25-2007, 04:05 PM

Read "I Am Legend" by Richard Matheson.  There is a detailed strategy for befriending a tormented stray dog in it.  It's a strategy mainly for an apocalyptic world overrun with vampires, but it might work in your neighborhood.

Death Metal Moe

01-25-2007, 04:12 PM

Wallower wrote: jeffdwright2001 wrote: SinA wrote: it's a full grown black and white Great Dane. I don't think he's all that great and I didn't know he was of mixed heritage, but I think you can catch him on Myspace.<img src="http://www.orlandoimprov.com/comics/cookd.jpg" border="0" width="250" height="376" /> He looks like he peed himself.It's probably sweat.  The only way this assfuck knows how to be funny is to run around the stage like a fucking tard.

Kevin

01-25-2007, 04:15 PM

Death Metal Moe wrote: Wallower wrote: jeffdwright2001 wrote: SinA wrote: it's a full grown black and white Great Dane. I don't think he's all that great and I didn't know he was of mixed heritage, but I think you can catch him on Myspace.<img src="http://www.orlandoimprov.com/comics/cookd.jpg" border="0" width="250" height="376" /> He looks like he peed himself.It's probably sweat.  The only way this assfuck knows how to be funny is to run around the stage like a fucking tard.And blatantly steal other people's jokes!