Fat-ism??? [Archive] - RonFez.net Messageboard

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milliehatchett

02-12-2007, 11:31 AM

I have lost 98lbs over the last year and I've noticed that my career has taken quite the upward turn. As the scale has moved down, my career has taken an upswing...to the point where I'm being groomed for a very large promotion in title and pay. I'm also being recognized in the industry more and a lot of  other major corporate players are trying to woo me. When I've spoken with other "zaftig" women - some of them blame their lack of job success on their weight and "fatism". What I've noticed about my own weight loss is the way it has affected my self-confidence. I've always been well-liked; friendly with great interpersonal skills but I firmly believe that the confidence I now have is getting me noticed by the corporate "heavyweights" (pun intended).I am sick of people pulling the ___ card before looking at other options. Race, weight, gender, sexual preferences, etc. are all areas where discrimination exists but that doesn't mean it ALWAYS exists.So am I wrong? Is it more reasonable to assume that the bigger I was, the more invisible I was because everyone hates a fat chick?

Don Stugots

02-12-2007, 11:33 AM

i cannot say accuratly with out before and after pics.  lots and lots of after pics

JPMNICK

02-12-2007, 11:33 AM

I think more than your weight, it probably has more to do with how you feel better about yourself. either way, congrats and best of luck!

Wallower

02-12-2007, 11:35 AM

There's no doubt that people are shallow and appearance driven. They have laws for that kind of thing but it's almost impossible to prove misconduct.On the flip side, has your weight loss increased your confidence or improved your ability to perform in your job? Not saying it has, just asking.

milliehatchett

02-12-2007, 11:44 AM

Wallower wrote: On the flip side, has your weight loss increased your confidence or improved your ability to perform in your job? Not saying it has, just asking. It has definitely improved my confidence. Even if it's just from a "I lost a ton of weight - I can do ANYTHING" kinda thing. My decision to lose weight was not predicated on the way I looked. Granted, I looked like hell but FEELING like hell was the motivator. My knees hurt, my ankles hurt and I was pre-diabetic. That scared the hell out of me.I've always been good at my job - GREAT at my job...just wasn't noticed and I didn't toot my own horn (except in the privacy of my own home - with candles and my shower massage).So there's that....

Mike Teacher

02-12-2007, 11:48 AM

My standard answer to students who bring this up to me more then i would have ever imagined:In a perfect world, people would not judge you on appearences, but it's not a perfect world, and there are a whole bunch of people out there who will judge you immediately upon seeing what you look like. This is sad, but it's what happens, in job and college interviews, meeting new people, and elsewhere.=I lost 1/3 of my weight, Bobby P lost a shitload, others here have too I forget so maybe they can chime in.For me, I feel younger then I did 7 years ago when I was 360. At 230, people do take me more 'seriously' for lack of a better word. Yes, I am happier now, and feel better. A hollywood agent had an article way back in GQ, when he was obese [he was huge] meetings with the big stars were fewer, and he said he wasnt taken as seriously. When he lost the weight, big stars [read: stars who live/die by their own appearence] took him a lot more seriously.I cant speak for others, it's screwed up and wrong, but I think it is the way it is.

milliehatchett

02-12-2007, 11:59 AM

Mike Teacher wrote: In a perfect world, people would not judge you on appearences, but it's not a perfect world, and there are a whole bunch of people out there who will judge you immediately upon seeing what you look like. This is sad, but it's what happens, in job and college interviews, meeting new people, and elsewhere. Mike, I agree with you on some levels but I have not (to my knowledge) experienced that prejudice 1st hand. In other words, if I wanted the job - I got the job and if I wanted a guy, I got the guy. Meeting new people, friends, a very active social life - I had no issues with those aspects even with being a fat chick. A lot of it is, in my opinion, a matter of personality and WHO I am. I wasn't "unsuccessful" at work by any means - it's just that I'm being noticed more. I'm also putting myself "out there" more because of a greater level of self-confidence. I think it's too easy and somewhat defeatist to put it all off on the way others think and act. If I just throw up my hands and say, "People are shallow and there's nothing I can do about it" - then I'm missing an opportunity to write and direct my own movie. Then again, what do I know? I'm just a girl (teehee).

Mike Teacher

02-12-2007, 12:37 PM

Millie my pat answer was more often directed at students who had a lot of ink on their arms, a lot of piercings, weird hair, clothing styles etc. who were headed to big University/big Job interviews and theyd flat out ask me about it. I tell them that it sucks, but their are interviewers [and other peeps] out their who will take one look at your tats, piercings, hair, clothes, etc. and think 'no way am I hiring this person'. Which sucks.There are old school fucks out there that will look at a guy with a beard [like me] and think 'slob. nope. next.' Glad you havent experienced the prejudice, not sure if I have; all I know is I sure feel better and more confident having lost the weight [seperate issue from above]

Don Stugots

02-12-2007, 12:42 PM

mike has a great point.  my dad owned and operated his own tow truck business for years and American Towmen magazine did a few stories on him.  they would never show pics of his arms due to tats on his forearms.  till this day, i want another tat and i will not put it in plain site. 