Told a girl we can;t be friends anymore

[CYYYFYYY]

<p>&nbsp;</p><div>I told a female friend who I have been great friends for years that we could no longer be friends. We dated for a bit and we ended it however we stayed great friends. She is not the greatest friend in the world, at times she was selfish and took advantage of me, however a great friend she was. I told her we could not be friends because she took advantage of my kindness. I also told her that I could not take hearing about her new BF all the time. She loves him but I do not care for him. I think there is something wrong with him. Is there jealousy? Yes, to a degree but I just don't like the guy. Now we have not talked in a few days and I miss her incredibly. I think about her all the time. I miss her calling me. I said some bad things to her that cannot be taken back. I lost my temper with her more times than I would have liked. Always threatening to end this friendship. I have alot of hate in me towards her. But the fact is I&nbsp;we cannot be back together. I cannot say lets be friends again. I have done this leaving her crap one too many times. Also in all honesty I expect more from her than she give me and I am not talking in a romantic way. Well, life is really sucking now and no one really understands our relationship so no one understands. People do not understand I need her so much now but I can;t call her. Even if I did it is all to late. Life sucks.</div>

[sailor]

<font size="2">sorry for this rough patch, but i'm proud of the strength you're showing.&nbsp; best of luck.&nbsp; things WILL get better. </font>

[mdr55]

<p><strong>So what do you do if she starts calling you????</strong></p><p><strong>What do you do???&nbsp;</strong></p>

[Jughead]

Its never to late!! Never.....Hope everything gets better..FAST....<img src="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/tiny_mce/plugins/emotions/images/thumbup.gif" border="0" />Keep us posted..No punn...

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by jughead46041 on 2-24-07 @ 4:15 PM</span>

[narc]

Unfortunately, this thing is part of growing up.

[LilLibra]

<strong>CYYYFYYY</strong> wrote:<br /><p>&nbsp;</p>*&gt;I told a female friend who I have been great friends for years that we could no longer be friends. We dated for a bit and we ended it however we stayed great friends. She is not the greatest friend in the world, at times she was selfish and took advantage of me, however a great friend she was. I told her we could not be friends because she took advantage of my kindness. I also told her that I could not take hearing about her new BF all the time. She loves him but I do not care for him. I think there is something wrong with him. Is there jealousy? Yes, to a degree but I just don't like the guy. Now we have not talked in a few days and I miss her incredibly. I think about her all the time. I miss her calling me. I said some bad things to her that cannot be taken back. I lost my temper with her more times than I would have liked. Always threatening to end this friendship. I have alot of hate in me towards her. But the fact is I we cannot be back together. I cannot say lets be friends again. I have done this leaving her crap one too many times. Also in all honesty I expect more from her than she give me and I am not talking in a romantic way. Well, life is really sucking now and no one really understands our relationship so no one understands. People do not understand I need her so much now but I can;t call her. Even if I did it is all to late. Life sucks.<p>&nbsp;</p><p>Well, it might not be <em>too</em> late to mend the friendship (if that's what you're really after) but you should probably give it some time. If you rush too quickly to apologize or try to make amends, it'll look like you're tempermental and insane. But if you let things cool down for a while, one day you can call her and ask to talk to her about what happened, explaining why you felt you had to end the friendship. But assure her that you really don't want to and that some things will have to change if the friendship is going to work. Hopefully if she feels the same way, she'll forgive and you can make peace.</p><p>Best of luck. </p>

[K.C.]

<p>You always have to do what you think is best for you. </p><p>If you think it's staying away, than that's the way you should go...a lot of times when you lose a close friend its almost on par with a breakup in terms of the range of emotions you go through, which would explain how you feel about it right now. </p><p>If you think getting her back as your friend is what's best, it's probably not too late, but you're going to have to realize a couple things; 1) you're going to have apologize to make things right. 2) as long as she's with this guy, you're friendship with her won't quite be the same because she knows the reason you didn't want to talk to her again was because of her boyfriend. </p>

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by K.C. on 2-24-07 @ 5:09 PM</span>

[satan-2]

<strong>CYYYFYYY</strong> wrote:<br /><p>&nbsp;</p>*&gt;I told a female friend who I have been great friends for years that we could no longer be friends. We dated for a bit and we ended it however we stayed great friends. She is not the greatest friend in the world, at times she was selfish and took advantage of me, however a great friend she was. I told her we could not be friends because she took advantage of my kindness. I also told her that I could not take hearing about her new BF all the time. She loves him but I do not care for him. I think there is something wrong with him. Is there jealousy? Yes, to a degree but I just don't like the guy. Now we have not talked in a few days and I miss her incredibly. I think about her all the time. I miss her calling me. I said some bad things to her that cannot be taken back. I lost my temper with her more times than I would have liked. Always threatening to end this friendship. I have alot of hate in me towards her. But the fact is I we cannot be back together. I cannot say lets be friends again. I have done this leaving her crap one too many times. Also in all honesty I expect more from her than she give me and I am not talking in a romantic way. Well, life is really sucking now and no one really understands our relationship so no one understands. People do not understand I need her so much now but I can;t call her. Even if I did it is all to late. Life sucks.<p>&nbsp;i have a similar story but instead i told her we can't hang around like we used to and since she is dating and i'm not, i refuse to call her. why...because i don't want to make her man jealous of our friendship. which is a great excuse in order to avoid her because there are a lot of guys who do get jealous very easily. </p><p>i must admit though she is very upset with me but is very understanding of what i said. it's a very logical way of thinking. </p>

[CYYYFYYY]

<p>She called me up today saying our whole relationship was about me. Threw everything in my face. I deserved it to a degree. I don;t know if I can handle anything anymore&nbsp;</p>

[patsopinion]

<p>just listen to some box car racer and get over it</p><p>i had the same thing</p><p>at one point i told her i didnt want to know her anymore and she laughed and said i didnt have a choice, we were both serious</p><p>she called me the other day and said that she missed me like 100X and then told me about how her and bf spent valentines day...wtf</p><p>these ones are crazy</p><p>dont go back, and do not think about her.&nbsp; every time u think of her pinch yourself real hard.&nbsp; eventually you will associate her with the not only emotional but real physical pain and be over her... or youll really get into s&amp;m shit... either way rite?&nbsp;</p>

[sr71blackbird]

<strong>CYYYFYYY</strong> wrote:<br /><p>She called me up today saying our whole relationship was about me. Threw everything in my face. I deserved it to a degree. I don;t know if I can handle anything anymore </p><p>I would move on.&nbsp; I suspect you had a crush on her despite what you say or admit to yourself.&nbsp; Let it go and find another.&nbsp; There are many more out there, dude!&nbsp;&nbsp; </p>

[ralphbxny]

blackbird is right...ya probably may have secretly still wanted her but it didnt happen. Dude forget her. It will bother you but its best. Join a coed softball league and find a new chick to hold your softballs!!

[Furtherman]

If you cannot stand to hear about her boyfriend, then you never wanted to be &quot;just friends&quot; in the first place, only something more.&nbsp; Walk away.

[LilLibra]

<strong>CYYYFYYY</strong> wrote:<br /><p>She called me up today saying our whole relationship was about me. Threw everything in my face. I deserved it to a degree. I don;t know if I can handle anything anymore </p><p>&nbsp;Then it's time to leave it alone. Start moving on. </p>

[satan-2]

<strong>LilLibra</strong> wrote:<br /><strong>CYYYFYYY</strong> wrote:<br /><p>She called me up today saying our whole relationship was about me. Threw everything in my face. I deserved it to a degree. I don;t know if I can handle anything anymore </p><p> Then it's time to leave it alone. Start moving on. </p><p>&nbsp;move on. life's way too short.</p>

[K.C.]

<p>I agree with everyone else. A point comes where you have to tap out and let it go. It's not an easy thing to do, but it's better than dwelling on it and torturing yourself over it. </p><p>I've gone through situations where I've had to cut myself off from people (in fact, one just very recently). After a couple weeks, the non-sensical, irrational thoughts about it and the constant over-analyzing subsides. </p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by K.C. on 2-27-07 @ 2:12 PM</span>

[raulfd4]

<p>wow.</p><p>literally just did the same thing yesterday, although i think that she is more broken up about it than i am. &nbsp;</p><p>we also were together for a while and i hold a lot of resentment towards her.&nbsp; i could also care less about her current relationships.&nbsp; it's hard, but i had to be honest with myself and realize she only made me angry in the long run, and i was tired of giving her the attention/affection she wanted.</p><p>it will be hard for a little while i am sure, but it will become normal.&nbsp; hopefully you just won't talk...talking about it more will only make things worse.&nbsp; that much i'm sure of.</p><p>my problem is that she's my best friend's sister so seeing her is inevitable. &nbsp;</p><p>please keep us updated on the situation and DON'T BREAK DOWN AND TALK!</p><p>&nbsp;</p>

[Knowledged_one]

<p>I hear you can hire O.J. Simpson for pretty cheap these days</p><p>&nbsp;Just sayin</p>

[satan-2]

<strong>raulfd4</strong> wrote:<br /><p>wow.</p><p>literally just did the same thing yesterday, although i think that she is more broken up about it than i am. </p><p>we also were together for a while and i hold a lot of resentment towards her. i could also care less about her current relationships. it's hard, but i had to be honest with myself and realize she only made me angry in the long run, and i was tired of giving her the attention/affection she wanted.</p><p>it will be hard for a little while i am sure, but it will become normal. hopefully you just won't talk...talking about it more will only make things worse. that much i'm sure of.</p><p>my problem is that she's my best friend's sister so seeing her is inevitable. </p><p>please keep us updated on the situation and DON'T BREAK DOWN AND TALK!</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;i say talk but make sure that what u say is short and to the point. don't totally cut her off because one day you might be the one asking her for some help. it happened to me but i try not to call her often and keep conversations short. </p>