If you were Dictator..

[sr71blackbird]

<p>If you became the Dictator of the United States tomorrow, what would be the first few changes you would make to the country, and why?</p><p align="center"><img src="http://www.bruteprop.com/v1/gallery/img/dictator.jpg" border="0" width="576" height="417" />&nbsp;</p>

[Skarhead]

<font size="2"><strong>KMFDM IS A DRUG AGAINST WAR</strong> </font>

[J.Clints]

On and fez Nation wide. 24/7. All ron and fez all the time. Mikeyboy would be 2nd in charge. And the horsemen would be my army.

[sr71blackbird]

I think I'd make a secret police force

[ppanda]

<strong>Skarhead</strong> wrote:<br /><font size="2"><strong>KMFDM IS A DRUG AGAINST WAR</strong> </font><p>Good call Skarhead...</p><p>Also nice segway into the forst thing I would do if I was dictator....<font size="4">Legalize everything!!!</font></p><p><font size="2">Because the &quot;war on drugs&quot; is an unwinnable waste of money.&nbsp; The government shouldnt care whether I want to poison myself or not.</font></p>

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by ppanda on 3-16-07 @ 9:37 PM</span>

[sr71blackbird]

Then, I would abolish Daylight savings time

[J.Clints]

<strong>sr71blackbird</strong> wrote:<br />Then, I would abolish Daylight savings time <p>Hell yea. Down with Daylight savings.</p>

[weekapaugjz]

<strong>sr71blackbird</strong> wrote:<br />I think I'd make a secret police force<p>&nbsp;think!?!&nbsp; mine would put the kgb and ss to shame... </p>

[Skarhead]

<strong>ppanda</strong> wrote:<br /><strong>Skarhead</strong> wrote:<br /><font size="2"><strong>KMFDM IS A DRUG AGAINST WAR</strong> </font><p>Good call Skarhead...</p><p>Also nice segway into the forst thing I would do if I was dictator....<font size="4">Legalize everything!!!</font></p><p>Picture looked familiar so I went out on a limb there</p>

[weekapaugjz]

<strong>jclintsma</strong> wrote:<br />On and fez Nation wide. 24/7. All ron and fez all the time. Mikeyboy would be 2nd in charge. And the horsemen would be my army.<p>&nbsp;just call me himmler...</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>

[sr71blackbird]

Then I would command the military to decimate everything and everyone in Iraq and establish it as a country sized base

[Gaia]

<strong>Skarhead</strong> wrote:<br /><font size="2"><strong>KMFDM IS A DRUG AGAINST WAR</strong> </font><p>Yes yes they are!</p>

[cougarjake13]

<p>pull all the troops out of iraq</p><p>then simutaneously drop bombs on iraq, afganistan, russia, north korea, venezuela, and cuba just for shits and giggles</p><p>&nbsp;</p>

[PapaBear]

<p>Free Asian foot massages for people named Todd.</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>And pie. Lots of pie.</p>

[NortonRules]

<p>1.&nbsp; I'd outlaw all religion and message boards, punishable by death.</p><p>2.&nbsp;&nbsp;Exterminate the entire Middle East.&nbsp; You can't kill roaches one at a time or even a hundred at a time.&nbsp; You kill them all at once.&nbsp; </p><p>3.&nbsp; I'd force 'the evening news' to not accept advertising dollars.&nbsp; They should get viewers by reporting facts in a quality and impartial way, not sensationalism and speculation.&nbsp; No commercials.&nbsp; Just one hour of news in the evening.&nbsp; One hour in the morning.&nbsp; Each station would have the same set design besides the logo.&nbsp; No frills.&nbsp; We don't need 24 hr news.&nbsp; CNN, MSNBC, CNBC and FOX would be abolished.&nbsp; They aren't news.&nbsp; They're 24 hour speculation, assumptions and lies.&nbsp; </p><p>4.&nbsp;&nbsp;I'd force Comedy Central to show something funny for a change, not just a bunch of hacks telling GWB and Cheney&nbsp;jokes and mugging for the camera (ala Jon 'The King Hack' Stewart).&nbsp; &nbsp;I'd probably end up abolishing Comedy Central altogether.</p><p>5.&nbsp; 24 hour Ron and Fez.&nbsp; 24 hour O&amp;A.&nbsp; 24 hour Razzle Dazzle.&nbsp; </p><p>6.&nbsp; Legalize all drugs and I mean all of them.&nbsp; I don't do&nbsp;drugs personally, but people should have a choice.&nbsp; </p><p>7.&nbsp; Privatize social security.&nbsp; </p><p>It's a start...</p>

[Kevin]

<strong>cougarjake13</strong> wrote:<br /><p>pull all the troops out of iraq</p><p>then simutaneously drop bombs on iraq, afganistan, russia, north korea, venezuela, and cuba and france just for shits and giggles</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;fixed it.</p>

[Don Stugots]

<strong>cougarjake13</strong> wrote:<br /><p>pull all the troops out of iraq</p><p>then simutaneously drop bombs on iraq, afganistan, russia, north korea, venezuela, and cuba just for shits and giggles</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;couldnt you leave Cuba as the next state so i can smoke my cigars like a gentelmen?</p>

[Don Stugots]

also,&nbsp; can anyone ban bras?&nbsp;

[Hottub]

<p>I'd put I 57 in the food pyramid</p><p>Black 47 doing the National Anthem</p><p>And I would rock the fat ass!!</p>

[reillyluck]

<p>smoke a blunt in the oval office.</p>

[cougarjake13]

<strong>Don Stugots</strong> wrote:<br /><strong>cougarjake13</strong> wrote:<br /><p>pull all the troops out of iraq</p><p>then simutaneously drop bombs on iraq, afganistan, russia, north korea, venezuela, and cuba just for shits and giggles</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;couldnt you leave Cuba as the next state so i can smoke my cigars like a gentelmen?</p><p>then we'll hold off on the bombs and tell castro look what we did to the rest of your buddies, if you dont wanna be next, then hand over the cigars and we'll be running your country now </p>

[Cleophus James]

sleep in<br />

[Ritalin]

<p>If I were Dictator of the World (slurp) and you were all robots (slurp) then all the hot bitches in the country would have to do me or get out (slurp).</p>&lt;&gt;I can't lie (slurp) <br />

[Gvac]

First I'd abolish Federal Income Tax.&nbsp; Then I'd turn the United States into a loose confederacy, with &quot;states' rights&quot; actually meaning something.

[SatCam]

I'd probably go for surgery and get it enlarged.

<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Oh, I thought the title of this thread was "If you had a tator dick"

http://www.attention-to-details.com/newslogimg/sonic-tater-tots.jpg

[bigredd]

I'd find out who killed Kennedy. Someone knows. No secret police here but I'm thinking a national &quot;farm&quot; would be a great start. I have to thnk the sales tax on that could produce billions of dollars every year. I'd take Cuba too. It'd be like Vegas on the beach.

[Stankfoot]

<p>&nbsp;</p><p><img src="http://i14.photobucket.com/albums/a350/stankfoot/dictators.jpg" border="0" />&nbsp;</p><p><font size="2">....... I'd be Handsome Dick !!&nbsp;</font></p>

[tele7]

Stankfoot....&nbsp; What movie is your sigpic from?&nbsp; I'm on netflix right now.&nbsp; Thanks in advance.

[Bulldogcakes]

<strong>Gvac</strong> wrote:<br />First I'd abolish Federal Income Tax. Then I'd turn the United States into a loose confederacy, with &quot;states' rights&quot; actually meaning something. &nbsp;THat, and then I'd send about half the people in Washington home and tell them to find real jobs. &nbsp;<p>&nbsp;</p>

[DoubleJ]

Proscriptions. Mass proscriptions would ensue immediately. What kind of tyrant would I be if I let my enemies and detractors run around breathing my air?

[Stankfoot]

<strong>telecaster7</strong> wrote:<br />Stankfoot.... What movie is your sigpic from? I'm on netflix right now. Thanks in advance.<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0097940/" target="_blank"> Mystery Train</a></p><p>&nbsp;</p>

[Reephdweller]

<p>I'd have it so that every morning we all wake up to bagels, eggs, bacon, and tomato soup.</p><p>Then I'd make it so that everyone had to crabwalk for a quarter mile before going to work in the salt mines.</p><p><img src="http://www.mutatovisual.com/beautifulmutants/reports/capobianco/images/perry-crabwalk.jpg" border="0" width="648" height="486" /></p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>For Gvac's sake I'd make it so that every third word a chick says is &quot;<a href="http://www.ronfez.net/messageboard/viewmessages.cfm/Forum/52/Topic/57499/page/PANTIES____.htm" target="_blank">Panties</a>&quot; regardless of the conversation.</p><p><img src="http://www.bestthongpanties.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/03/3.jpg" border="0" width="649" height="587" />&nbsp;</p><p>I would nationalize Rex Manning Day and make &quot;Say no more&quot; the national anthem.</p><p><img src="http://i35.photobucket.com/albums/d151/E666/rexmanning.jpg" border="0" width="245" height="193" />&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>I would also invade Cuba and take it over, and turn it into a new state and celebrate with Cuban sandwiches for all!</p><p><img src="http://mmm-yoso.typepad.com/mmmyoso/images/andres08.JPG" border="0" width="350" height="262" />&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>

[A.J.]

<p>All of the most violent prisoners will be executed immediately.</p><p>English would be made the official national language.&nbsp; You can speak your native language but learning English will be mandatory.</p><p>The use of the word&nbsp;&quot;God&quot; will be hereafter&nbsp;forbidden by all elected officials.&nbsp; Existing coinage, artwork and offical documents will be grandfathered.</p><p>Failure to move out of the passing lane wil result in a one-month revocation of your driver's licence.&nbsp; And additional month will be added to each subsequent conviction.</p><p>Spray painters/grafitti artists&nbsp;will be flogged.</p><p>The Dictator will amend these and future laws at his leisure.</p>

[Bulldogcakes]

<p><img src="http://static.flickr.com/63/201699501_fb6707ad3c.jpg" border="0" width="400" height="266" /></p><p>Ya believe that? Its a potato. &nbsp;</p>

[lleeder]

<font size="3">I'd set up the&nbsp;country&nbsp;so everything is decided by a series of blowjobs.</font>

[RogerPodacter]

<strong>A.J.</strong> wrote:<br /><p>All of the most violent prisoners will be executed immediately.</p><p>English would be made the official national language. You can speak your native language but learning English will be mandatory.</p><p>The use of the word &quot;God&quot; will be hereafter forbidden by all elected officials. Existing coinage, artwork and offical documents will be grandfathered.</p><p>Failure to move out of the passing lane wil result in a one-month revocation of your driver's licence. And additional month will be added to each subsequent conviction.</p><p>Spray painters/grafitti artists will be flogged.</p><p>The Dictator will amend these and future laws at his leisure.</p><p>&nbsp;Agreed!&nbsp; Brilliant post.&nbsp; </p>

[Mike Teacher]

<p>One hour maximum TV per day.</p><p>Legalize It.</p><p>Drunk Driving: First Offense = 90 days jail. Second = Life in Jail.</p><p>One Hour minimum reading non-fiction educational materials per day.</p><p>Mandatory Music education K-12.</p><p>One hour minimum outdoors a day.</p><p>Mandatory working knowledge of civics history science math poetry on a 6th grade level. [I know that's aiming very high, and how tested TBD]. I was also gonna make poverty and guns and disease illegal worldwide but thats cliche and impossible and actually not really a good idea.</p><p>Outlaw the Fatties; Anyone who is 20% or more over the set weight [? I'm winging it here] will have to diet until weight is lost.</p><p>Illegal and destroyed immediately; all non portable Gaming Systems. All Cel Phones. </p><p>Abolish the penny.</p><p>Eliminate Network TV News.</p><p>Morning Zoo Radio = Punishable by Death.</p><p>Abolish 90% of brands in the US retail market. Brands TBD.</p><p>Being an asshole in public will be a punishable offense. The criteria for what defines being the asshole will be determined in the future when technology has advanced to the point where were all wearing computers and online with each other constantly, and we can all vote instantly at the guy who is being a dick to his kid, that he deserves to have the word 'Asshole' glow on his forehead in public for a while. </p><p>&nbsp;</p>

[sr71blackbird]

Make it illegal to call a person going from second base to third Out just because the ball hit by the batter is caught