*****ATTENTION: I am raising the Terror Alert level to: TAUPE *****

[Judge Smails]

Everyone stay in your homes with the shades drawn for the next couple of weeks, just to be safe.

You see, when my wife isn't busy making Miracle Whip sandwiches, she likes to sell our old crap to strangers. Today, a couple of the houses in the neighborhood had a combined garage sale. My wife just told me about something that "concerned" her. It seems that she and her friends are quite the little suburban housewife racial profilers.

Apparently this very arabic looking fellow was acting a little shifty and was adamant about talking my wife down to seven dollars (from ten) on one of my old briefcases. When all was said and done he bought the briefcase and two sets of children's walkie-talkies. Now my wife is wondering if he was "up to something" and maybe we should tell someone. She apparently had no problem taking his seven dollars at the time.

Oh, he apparently also bought some used children's clothing but Mrs. Sherlock Smails hasn't been able to connect that buy to the impending attack - YET.

[Doctor Z]

Oh, he apparently also bought some used children's clothing but Mrs. Sherlock Smails hasn't been able to connect that buy to the impending attack - YET.

Well, the child is gonna be the one with the bomb strapped to its chest. They do that now.

[DonInNC]

Oh, he apparently also bought some used children's clothing but Mrs. Sherlock Smails hasn't been able to connect that buy to the impending attack - YET.

Please tell me it was garanimals.

[TheMojoPin]

Taupe is NOT on the official set of Sebben & Sebben alert levels!

Moving Pictures
Pee Pants (Blackwatch Plaid)
Really High (Pink Polka Dots)
High (Red)
Elevated (Yellow)
Low (Green)

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[cupcakelove]

You sold him what?! I hope you realize this makes you an accessory.

[ChrisTheCop]

Apparently this very arabic looking fellow ...was adamant about talking my wife down to seven dollars (from ten) on one of my old briefcases.

Probably just a Jew.




...theyre on OUR side, right?

[midwestjeff]

The guy said it was tan and taupe.



FRANKS AND BEANS!!!

[led37zep]

There goes my week! Thanks a lot Mrs. Smails!


I haven't been this upset since paul-o posted about Ewan McGregors motorcycle trip

[Midkiff]

Judge Smails = currently my favorite topic-starter!

[barjockey]

what about "Mauve"http://re3.mm-a2.yimg.com/image/2481182800

[Ritalin]

Banana Republic already set the threat level to ecru.

Too late.

[TheMojoPin]

There goes my week! Thanks a lot Mrs. Smails!


I haven't been this upset since paul-o posted about Ewan McGregors motorcycle trip

Those IDIOTS.

[Fat_Sunny]

How Much Did Your Neighbor Get For The Christmas Lights?

[angrymissy]

Taupe is NOT on the official set of Sebben & Sebben alert levels!

Moving Pictures
Pee Pants (Blackwatch Plaid)
Really High (Pink Polka Dots)
High (Red)
Elevated (Yellow)
Low (Green)

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HA-HA! Dangly Parts

[AJDELAWARE]

Ha-ha! Computers!

I love Harvey Birdman.

[SatCam]

I would like to see the percentage of the threads that judge starts regarding his wife's level of intelligence






probably like 60%

[Bulldogcakes]

http://www.abikecentral.com/images/ebay.gif

[Bulldogcakes]

Everyone stay in your homes with the shades drawn for the next couple of weeks, just to be safe.

You see, when my wife isn't busy making Miracle Whip sandwiches, she likes to sell our old crap to strangers. Today, a couple of the houses in the neighborhood had a combined garage sale. My wife just told me about something that "concerned" her. It seems that she and her friends are quite the little suburban housewife racial profilers.

Apparently this very arabic looking fellow was acting a little shifty and was adamant about talking my wife down to seven dollars (from ten) on one of my old briefcases. When all was said and done he bought the briefcase and two sets of children's walkie-talkies. Now my wife is wondering if he was "up to something" and maybe we should tell someone. She apparently had no problem taking his seven dollars at the time.

Oh, he apparently also bought some used children's clothing but Mrs. Sherlock Smails hasn't been able to connect that buy to the impending attack - YET.

Your wife is turning into my mother *shudder*

[tele7]

How much were you asking for the 72 pairs of panties?

[Hottub]

Alright, guys. Let's lay off of Mrs. Smails.

Besides, remember what Mr. B said. The Judge is a lucky man.:wink:

[RoseBlood]

Alright, guys. Let's lay off of Mrs. Smails.

Besides, remember what Mr. B said. The Judge is a lucky man.:wink:


I love Mrs. Smails!!! She is a saint, she puts up with his bloody penis in the summer. She is becoming quite popular around these parts thanks to Mr. Smails lovely topic starters.

[Judge Smails]

Besides, remember what Mr. B said. The Judge is a lucky man.:wink:


Whoa! What is this in reference to? Did I miss the great Ronnie Two Bucks make a reference to me, or something? Or is this some other "Judge" of which you speak?

Also, just for the record: my wife is a highly literate and well educated professional woman. She just gets VERY jumpy whenever she is thrust into incidences involving national security.

[Hottub]

Whoa! What is this in reference to? Did I miss the great Ronnie Two Bucks make a reference to me, or something? Or is this some other "Judge" of which you speak?

Also, just for the record: my wife is a highly literate and well educated professional woman. She just gets VERY jumpy whenever she is thrust into incidences involving sandwich spreads.

C'mon Judge. I'm playing with you.
Think back to what he said about certain women.:wacko:

[Judge Smails]

C'mon Judge. I'm playing with you.
Think back to what he said about certain women.:wacko:

Gotcha.

Actually, Mr. B. did once call my wife a bitch on air. It was during an interview leading up to The Ultimate New Yorker contest back at WNEW (which I won, by the way).

Fez: So are you good at trivia?

Me: Yeah. I've always been good at trivia. My wife calls me the big book of useless information and uniteresting facts.

Ron: That bitch! If my wife ever said something like that to me I'd wake the kids just to see the beating I'd put on her.

[JustJon]

Taupe is NOT on the official set of Sebben & Sebben alert levels!

Moving Pictures
Pee Pants (Blackwatch Plaid)
Really High (Pink Polka Dots)
High (Red)
Elevated (Yellow)
Low (Green)

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Conveniently, this episode was repeated last night. I'm raising the level to Rush's seminal album, Moving Pictures.