Kathleen From The Bronx
09-05-2007, 11:33 PM
Dear Ron and Fez Shooow,
Hey, I know that I've said this all before....but today's show reminded me all over again..... that Ronnie B. could definitely be a therapist, or a, "life coach," as they are sometimes called....
I had been nervous to hear Fez's, "Hate Letter," to himself cause...you know... don't be mean to Fez, Fez!!! I started thinking perhaps that the exercise might prove to be therapeutic or something.... No. Fezzie said after reading his letter which started off, "Well NICE goin asshole! You did it again.." that the effort did not turn out to be cathartic at all.....Damn. I was certainly sad to hear it and all the abusive shit that Fez's inner voice had to say..... and then Ron had this brilliant idea! Read that inner dialogue out loud again, but this time in the high-pitched voice of a Frenchman....Then re-read it as Droopy Dog........ Genius!
It got me thinkin.....What if that approach could really, really help people get their cruel, detrimental inner voices in check.... Maybe...just maybe.......if you change the tone and personality of your inner voice, you will eventually change the way you treat yourself.....
It's like one of those context things.... It's like you guys have done on the show before....Something like reading a story about a truck full of nuns exploding with sad music in the background and you're cryining and screaming, "WHHHYYY??!" while shaking your fist.... If you change that background tune to something goofy like the Benny Hill theme music, yer laughin.... It will feel like hijinks! Maybe back then you said it was a truck full of puppies....??? Hmmm... changed it to nuns with all the dog controversy as of late......
Yes....yes......I mean, take for example one of Fezzie's other famous impressions: Jan Brady..... What if he used Jan as his inner voice?? Think about this... are you gonna let Jan Brady call you, "whhorthless??? I HIGHLY doubt it!! "Who are YOU talkin to, Jan Brady!!!?? Look at you! You and your ridiculous curly, black wig that you wore to Lucy Winter's party...Pleeeease... Who YOU talkin to??" Put that inner bitch in her place! Fight back with that inner voice...... Don't put up with that nonsense... Her and her failed attempts at freckle-fading..... Pfft!
Ayyye.... I suppose the corrective technique might not work for everyone....like say if you can't do impressions...AT ALL.... like me... I can't do a single one. I mean, if pressured, I might try sometimes to pull off this roaring 20's kinda thing... "Mrraah I'm the Great Gatsby!! I live on West Egg..." Fuckin pathetic..... Anyway, but overall I think this therapy might really do a lot of good for a lot of people! I am in......
I kinda had this daydream....or perchance was it a vision? I imagined turning on the Discovery Health Channel, twenty years in the future.......and to my surprise there is an in depth program focusing on, "The Bennington Method: Changing Your Inner Voice..."
I will muse... "Ahhh yes! I was listening on the blessed day of its birth!!" The report will state that while, at first, The Bennington Method was laughed out of the institutes....and in the early days there were many misdiagnosed cases of Multiple Personality Disorder by therapists unfamiliar with the study......the process eventually revealed itself as highly effective, and was embraced by the mental health community. Fantastic. I kinda resented Discovery Health's inquiry, later in the show, as to whether The Bennington Method can be linked to the rapidly escalating number of cases of, "Rich Little Syndrome," running rampant in society... Fuck dat shit....
Anyway, I could just as easily see myself stumbling upon an MSNBC Investigates special on, "Ron Bennington Ministries," twenty years in the future too.... Friends, I am as willing to join that church as I am to try out radical new therapies..... Ronnie stated that he could easily have a congregation, "though they would be a motley crew."
I thought it was so funny today when talking about faith, Ron said, "I have faith! I have faith right now that a pocket can hold water!" as he proceeded to fill Earl's pocket with water.... Ohhh... but it leaked... I laughed so hard when Ronnie mournfully lamented, "Ah why Lord??! Why did you make a fool outta me??!?" and then, "Oh..OOOoh... I didn't have faith! I had SARCASM!"
Oh yeah... but back to this church.... Ronnie said with his carny background, the meetin' would be mostly made up of circus tricks... "but it would be a really good show." I believe it... I believe!!!
I would love to be there under the revival tent, witnessing Black Earl swallow a live squirrel!! It'd be all, "Guulp!" and there goes Squirrely Nutkins down the hatch!!! Amazing! Plus it's really handy that, "Black Earl," and, "squirrel," rhyme.....Preachers like to be rhyming shit.... "ALL you fuckers are gonna be eatin squirrel!!" Ron would yell.... and somehow we'd all wanna.... It would be rad. You have all that to look forward to, AND faith healings..... Just like a much hipper Benny Hinn, instead of throwing his jacket and knocking people to the floor with its saving power, Ron could throw holy cowbells and lit cigars at peoples' foreheads....... Again, I am IN.
(An aside): Have you noticed Benny Hill and Benny Hinn were referenced in one email!?! I have always dreamed that this day would come....!!! I've said it before, I'll say it again...
The Ron and Fez Show makes dreeeams come true....
Back to business... Yes, I am in... even though the whole tithing thing might be a problem fer me... Remember there was that caller professing to want to join the church....He said he'd even give in his 10%.... Ron asked him what kinda dough he was pullin in and the caller responded, "About 40-50...Somethin like that..." Ron replied, "Hmmm.....Yeah... I'm gonna need a lot more than that.... I tell you..... If there was four or five grand waitin down in my mailbox, I'm still not gettin up til Time Magazine shows up..... Lemme know when The Rolling Stone is in, then I'll walk down there." That made me cackle...I'll get that money together.... I wanna be there when Ronnie performs the miracle of being able to eat and sleep at the same time! For reals...
So...we were just talkin religion here, so might as well bring up politics too..... You guys were talkin about the film, "The Hunting Party," that's comin out....had James Brolin who's in it on the phone..... Ron was sayin that the movie left him feeling like both sides, left and right, are playing for the same team... and how it seems like we as a people are being lied to constantly.... Ron was so disgusted with it all, that by the time the next election rolls around, he wants to stuff a dead rat in the ballot box.
Dude, that would be an act of defiance, and I agree..... I'd like to take part... but I don't wanna touch a dead rat. I was thinking, what if we signed up to be polling officials, all under-cover-like, and in all the voting booths we hid those big inflatable rats that you see at Union protests and strikes...with the gnarly teeth, and beeedy eyes....??
People would open up the curtain thing to go in and vote, and scream, "AHHHH!!! WHOA!!! Yikes!!!! What are yooou doin here???" Yeah I know it would be all kinda complicated, and it would take a lot more planning than just showin up with a dead rat.... but ..... touching dead rats is gross. Oh. Ohhh...wait... hold on.... We're supposed to be making a statement here with our dead rat votes, not terrorizing the fine people who come out to vote at whatever neighborhood middle-school... Ahhhh fergeit it! I just got all confused...a lil carried away or somethin.... Ermm.... YEah....
OK! Nutha thing real quick..... Ron mentioned in passing today that he can't stand pets with human names... He brought up a guy he knew named Dan, who named his dog...Dan. Yeah, I hear you man, that is kinda nutty..... dogs with human names.... This reminds me of an idear that ye olde Briancake came up with many years ago.... that I steal and act like is my own... cause that's the kinda bastard I am... a stealin bastard... I'm like, "What, we're married...it's like.. we are.....the same person!! We speak as a unit yo!!" That's my excuse for snatchin ideas away, like a seagull might steal a french fry right outta a toddler's hand..... Terrible.. Oh yeah... but the point...
Brian had this idea....When we move somewhere new, we would name our pets after the neighbor's children..... "Hello meet my puppy, Abigail... and this is my ferret called, Victor!" and then acting incredulous, "Whhhhuut!!? Those are your kids names???!! HAH! What a coinkydink! Ahhh crazy ole world, chuckle...chuckle....."
Ohhh it would be so much fun...cause that would be really weird...... for them. Ohhh Ron and Fez Show.... you know OF COURSE we wouldn't do that! Just silly ideas....silllly ideas.............
Anyway.... lots to think about today....therapy....faith...politics...... I find it all crazy helpful! OK buddies.... See yez later....
Signed,
kathleen from the bronx :):):)
Hey, I know that I've said this all before....but today's show reminded me all over again..... that Ronnie B. could definitely be a therapist, or a, "life coach," as they are sometimes called....
I had been nervous to hear Fez's, "Hate Letter," to himself cause...you know... don't be mean to Fez, Fez!!! I started thinking perhaps that the exercise might prove to be therapeutic or something.... No. Fezzie said after reading his letter which started off, "Well NICE goin asshole! You did it again.." that the effort did not turn out to be cathartic at all.....Damn. I was certainly sad to hear it and all the abusive shit that Fez's inner voice had to say..... and then Ron had this brilliant idea! Read that inner dialogue out loud again, but this time in the high-pitched voice of a Frenchman....Then re-read it as Droopy Dog........ Genius!
It got me thinkin.....What if that approach could really, really help people get their cruel, detrimental inner voices in check.... Maybe...just maybe.......if you change the tone and personality of your inner voice, you will eventually change the way you treat yourself.....
It's like one of those context things.... It's like you guys have done on the show before....Something like reading a story about a truck full of nuns exploding with sad music in the background and you're cryining and screaming, "WHHHYYY??!" while shaking your fist.... If you change that background tune to something goofy like the Benny Hill theme music, yer laughin.... It will feel like hijinks! Maybe back then you said it was a truck full of puppies....??? Hmmm... changed it to nuns with all the dog controversy as of late......
Yes....yes......I mean, take for example one of Fezzie's other famous impressions: Jan Brady..... What if he used Jan as his inner voice?? Think about this... are you gonna let Jan Brady call you, "whhorthless??? I HIGHLY doubt it!! "Who are YOU talkin to, Jan Brady!!!?? Look at you! You and your ridiculous curly, black wig that you wore to Lucy Winter's party...Pleeeease... Who YOU talkin to??" Put that inner bitch in her place! Fight back with that inner voice...... Don't put up with that nonsense... Her and her failed attempts at freckle-fading..... Pfft!
Ayyye.... I suppose the corrective technique might not work for everyone....like say if you can't do impressions...AT ALL.... like me... I can't do a single one. I mean, if pressured, I might try sometimes to pull off this roaring 20's kinda thing... "Mrraah I'm the Great Gatsby!! I live on West Egg..." Fuckin pathetic..... Anyway, but overall I think this therapy might really do a lot of good for a lot of people! I am in......
I kinda had this daydream....or perchance was it a vision? I imagined turning on the Discovery Health Channel, twenty years in the future.......and to my surprise there is an in depth program focusing on, "The Bennington Method: Changing Your Inner Voice..."
I will muse... "Ahhh yes! I was listening on the blessed day of its birth!!" The report will state that while, at first, The Bennington Method was laughed out of the institutes....and in the early days there were many misdiagnosed cases of Multiple Personality Disorder by therapists unfamiliar with the study......the process eventually revealed itself as highly effective, and was embraced by the mental health community. Fantastic. I kinda resented Discovery Health's inquiry, later in the show, as to whether The Bennington Method can be linked to the rapidly escalating number of cases of, "Rich Little Syndrome," running rampant in society... Fuck dat shit....
Anyway, I could just as easily see myself stumbling upon an MSNBC Investigates special on, "Ron Bennington Ministries," twenty years in the future too.... Friends, I am as willing to join that church as I am to try out radical new therapies..... Ronnie stated that he could easily have a congregation, "though they would be a motley crew."
I thought it was so funny today when talking about faith, Ron said, "I have faith! I have faith right now that a pocket can hold water!" as he proceeded to fill Earl's pocket with water.... Ohhh... but it leaked... I laughed so hard when Ronnie mournfully lamented, "Ah why Lord??! Why did you make a fool outta me??!?" and then, "Oh..OOOoh... I didn't have faith! I had SARCASM!"
Oh yeah... but back to this church.... Ronnie said with his carny background, the meetin' would be mostly made up of circus tricks... "but it would be a really good show." I believe it... I believe!!!
I would love to be there under the revival tent, witnessing Black Earl swallow a live squirrel!! It'd be all, "Guulp!" and there goes Squirrely Nutkins down the hatch!!! Amazing! Plus it's really handy that, "Black Earl," and, "squirrel," rhyme.....Preachers like to be rhyming shit.... "ALL you fuckers are gonna be eatin squirrel!!" Ron would yell.... and somehow we'd all wanna.... It would be rad. You have all that to look forward to, AND faith healings..... Just like a much hipper Benny Hinn, instead of throwing his jacket and knocking people to the floor with its saving power, Ron could throw holy cowbells and lit cigars at peoples' foreheads....... Again, I am IN.
(An aside): Have you noticed Benny Hill and Benny Hinn were referenced in one email!?! I have always dreamed that this day would come....!!! I've said it before, I'll say it again...
The Ron and Fez Show makes dreeeams come true....
Back to business... Yes, I am in... even though the whole tithing thing might be a problem fer me... Remember there was that caller professing to want to join the church....He said he'd even give in his 10%.... Ron asked him what kinda dough he was pullin in and the caller responded, "About 40-50...Somethin like that..." Ron replied, "Hmmm.....Yeah... I'm gonna need a lot more than that.... I tell you..... If there was four or five grand waitin down in my mailbox, I'm still not gettin up til Time Magazine shows up..... Lemme know when The Rolling Stone is in, then I'll walk down there." That made me cackle...I'll get that money together.... I wanna be there when Ronnie performs the miracle of being able to eat and sleep at the same time! For reals...
So...we were just talkin religion here, so might as well bring up politics too..... You guys were talkin about the film, "The Hunting Party," that's comin out....had James Brolin who's in it on the phone..... Ron was sayin that the movie left him feeling like both sides, left and right, are playing for the same team... and how it seems like we as a people are being lied to constantly.... Ron was so disgusted with it all, that by the time the next election rolls around, he wants to stuff a dead rat in the ballot box.
Dude, that would be an act of defiance, and I agree..... I'd like to take part... but I don't wanna touch a dead rat. I was thinking, what if we signed up to be polling officials, all under-cover-like, and in all the voting booths we hid those big inflatable rats that you see at Union protests and strikes...with the gnarly teeth, and beeedy eyes....??
People would open up the curtain thing to go in and vote, and scream, "AHHHH!!! WHOA!!! Yikes!!!! What are yooou doin here???" Yeah I know it would be all kinda complicated, and it would take a lot more planning than just showin up with a dead rat.... but ..... touching dead rats is gross. Oh. Ohhh...wait... hold on.... We're supposed to be making a statement here with our dead rat votes, not terrorizing the fine people who come out to vote at whatever neighborhood middle-school... Ahhhh fergeit it! I just got all confused...a lil carried away or somethin.... Ermm.... YEah....
OK! Nutha thing real quick..... Ron mentioned in passing today that he can't stand pets with human names... He brought up a guy he knew named Dan, who named his dog...Dan. Yeah, I hear you man, that is kinda nutty..... dogs with human names.... This reminds me of an idear that ye olde Briancake came up with many years ago.... that I steal and act like is my own... cause that's the kinda bastard I am... a stealin bastard... I'm like, "What, we're married...it's like.. we are.....the same person!! We speak as a unit yo!!" That's my excuse for snatchin ideas away, like a seagull might steal a french fry right outta a toddler's hand..... Terrible.. Oh yeah... but the point...
Brian had this idea....When we move somewhere new, we would name our pets after the neighbor's children..... "Hello meet my puppy, Abigail... and this is my ferret called, Victor!" and then acting incredulous, "Whhhhuut!!? Those are your kids names???!! HAH! What a coinkydink! Ahhh crazy ole world, chuckle...chuckle....."
Ohhh it would be so much fun...cause that would be really weird...... for them. Ohhh Ron and Fez Show.... you know OF COURSE we wouldn't do that! Just silly ideas....silllly ideas.............
Anyway.... lots to think about today....therapy....faith...politics...... I find it all crazy helpful! OK buddies.... See yez later....
Signed,
kathleen from the bronx :):):)