New Objective in lines: Annoy the Annoyers!

[Death Metal Moe]

So I needed to go to the local Wal Mart. Gay, I know. But into each life a little bland shopping must fall, so off I go in my Subaru.

I gets ma shit all together and saunter up to the cash register. Hey! There's a guy almost done, that's my lane baby. Or is it....

This fucking pile of blue sweat panted humanity takes like 5 fucking minutes to WRITE A CHECK??!?!??!? DIE!!!! Die in your Suburban uniform you piece of living shit!!!

It's at this moment that my mental radiator is starting to boil over. But ya know what, I'm not going to let this undaignosed retard ruin my life. My new thing is now: FIGHT BACK.

I start to smack, slap and tap ever fucking surface I can in time to a drum solo in my head. Oh man, Neal Peart would have gotten a semi hard one watching the ferocity I was smacking those imaginary drums to. I did it so loud the lady at the next register looked over at me. She probably wanted to make sure I wasn't taking a seizure.

Now this didn't speed up Ol' T-shrit Tucked into Sweatpants man, but this is what it did. It transferred some of my frustration back onto him and made me laugh like a fucking moron in the car. Now instead of a pissed off few minutes, I have a funny story and feel so much better.

You can't change life, but you can change how you deal with life.

[underdog]

In my Subaru. Gay, I know.

Fixed it.

But really, everytime I see someone write a check, I have to remind myself that its not the year 1985.

[Hottub]

Oh MAN!! I HATE that!
You think you got the perfect line picked out...

OK. Just this one lady, and she only has a few items. Then the fun begins.
"Excuse me! This item came up at $1.59, but the sign cleary said $1.49!"

Hey Cunt!! Here's a dime from my own pocket. Move it along. Take that shit up with Customer Service! Some of us have lives!!!

[spoon]

.....Now instead of a pissed off few minutes, I have a funny story and feel so much better.



Wow, it's no wonder we don't get along! Your story is so Don and Mike I can't believe you didn't like them. I bet your like those gay hating republicans tapping feet in public restrooms. Booosh!

[reillyluck]

was it gvac?

[torker]

Sorray about that, budday. If I knew you were in a rush I would have let you ahead of me.:sad:

[spoon]

was it gvac?

Finally, some funny in the thread!

[Hottub]

Finally, some funny in the thread!


Lord knows, we couldn't depend on you.

[King Hippos Bandaid]

this point was covered in a different way on curb your enthuiasm

Have your payment ready, pay your Transaction , then move the fuck along

:king:

[mdr55]

You should of yelled "Damn! Now I know why I always shop at Target!"


Next time, go back with a boatshit of pennies and buy stuff. Then you'll be "That guy".





Or how bout when the person infront of you complains about the sale price (say it's off about 5 cents or something) and hoots and hollers to get that 5 cents.

[Marc with a c]

sweatpants?

[Hottub]

Horsepants?

[PapaBear]

That must be a ghetto Wal Mart. At the ones here, you just hand them a blank check and it runs through the register just like a debit card. They then hand the check back to you.

[cupcakelove]

You chose to go into Walmart, you knew what you were getting yourself into. I can't feel sorry for you.

[Hottub]

Seriously. Who the hell carries a checkbook with them? and why? You have debit card linked directly to your account. You can swipe and begin the transaction beore you are even done being rung up.
I am down to aboot 20 checks a year. And they are all for school fundraisers, Boy Scouts, Little Leauge, etc.
I even put the down payment to the wifes car on debit at the dealership.

It's the 21st century. Embrace it!

[DolaMight]

The worst is when you got that perfect line, you've analyzed the number of items to people in line ratio in your head, you make your decision and then you're forced to stick with it no matter what happens. Just when your line picking prowess is making you proud, some fruxer has a 5 cent item with no tag and wants a price check to prove it was 5 cents not 10. Then your would be best line becomes the worst as you wait and wait and debate whether to cut your losses and swich lines. Finally you do and the price check comes through on your former line and you realize you should stop shopping at walmart. Line-Rage is a close cousin of Road-Rage and not to be toyed with.

[spoon]

Horsepants?

And you should talk. U murder any joke over the course of years. Go lick ass elsewhere. Seriously, you're sooo cute.

[nevnut]

Oh MAN!! I HATE that!
You think you got the perfect line picked out...

OK. Just this one lady, and she only has a few items. Then the fun begins.
"Excuse me! This item came up at $1.59, but the sign cleary said $1.49!"

Hey Cunt!! Here's a dime from my own pocket. Move it along. Take that shit up with Customer Service! Some of us have lives!!!

I really wish you wouldn't talk about my wife that why.

[PapaBear]

Last check I wrote was to Spoon.

[Hottub]

And you should talk. U murder any joke over the course of years. Go lick ass elsewhere. Seriously, you're sooo cute.

I really am!:wub:

[spoon]

Last check I wrote was to Spoon.

Don't worry, it looks like we're about to even up this year if you keep picking like this week. Nice job.

[DolaMight]

I really am!:wub:

Cute and I'd even say sassy.

[SatCam]

Wow, it's no wonder we don't get along! Your story is so Don and Mike I can't believe you didn't like them. I bet your like those gay hating republicans tapping feet in public restrooms. Booosh!

do you subscribe to moes threads?

[BMoses]

I am down to aboot 20 checks a year. And they are all for school fundraisers, Boy Scouts, Little Leauge, etc.

You made it to Eagle Scout yet?

[Doogie]

So I needed to go to the local Wal Mart. Gay, I know. But into each life a little bland shopping must fall, so off I go in my Subaru.

I gets ma shit all together and saunter up to the cash register. Hey! There's a guy almost done, that's my lane baby. Or is it....

This fucking pile of blue sweat panted humanity takes like 5 fucking minutes to WRITE A CHECK??!?!??!? DIE!!!! Die in your Suburban uniform you piece of living shit!!!

It's at this moment that my mental radiator is starting to boil over. But ya know what, I'm not going to let this undaignosed retard ruin my life. My new thing is now: FIGHT BACK.

I start to smack, slap and tap ever fucking surface I can in time to a drum solo in my head. Oh man, Neal Peart would have gotten a semi hard one watching the ferocity I was smacking those imaginary drums to. I did it so loud the lady at the next register looked over at me. She probably wanted to make sure I wasn't taking a seizure.

Now this didn't speed up Ol' T-shrit Tucked into Sweatpants man, but this is what it did. It transferred some of my frustration back onto him and made me laugh like a fucking moron in the car. Now instead of a pissed off few minutes, I have a funny story and feel so much better.

You can't change life, but you can change how you deal with life.

You sure this happened to you and you arent just doing a recap of last night's Curb Your Enthusiasm??

[spoon]

do you subscribe to moes threads?

nope. and shutup male groupie

[ChrisTheCop]

annoy.
the annoyer.

yes...thank you moe, i think i know how to handle scottinnj now.

(i may annoy some of you along with it, for that i apologize in advance).

[spoon]

Annoy away Chris! I love it.:thumbup:

[Fallon]

annoy.
the annoyer.

yes...thank you moe, i think i know how to handle scottinnj now.

(i may annoy some of you along with it, for that i apologize in advance).
Too late for apology's!

[ChrisTheCop]

Too late for apology's!

Isnt that a Coldplay song?

[Fallon]

Isnt that a Coldplay song?

It should be.

[Reephdweller]

You sure this happened to you and you arent just doing a recap of last night's Curb Your Enthusiasm??

Wow, I was just thinking the same thing!

I fucking hate people in the lines, especially the check writers, and as Hottub said the ones who will fight over a dime. And like on Curb you go on a line that's moving well and all it takes is one customer to bring it to a dead halt.

My favorite is the fucker who grabs the clothes from the rack without the price tag on it and now the cashier has to do the price check....of course no one is in the area to check it.

[Midkiff]

Wal-Mart can print your check for you, all you have to do is sign it.

[Furtherman]

http://bavatuesdays.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/06/lebowskicheck.jpg

[angrymissy]

I am the self-checkout master at the grocery store. I love it and am out of there faster than the regular line.

THEY NEED TO FUCKING TEST PEOPLE OR SOMETHING before they let them use the self-checkout lanes. I fucking can't STAND it. Either its an old person that takes 30 minutes to scan 3 items or some dumb soccer mom who thinks its cute to let her kid try to scan all the times. LEARN HOW TO USE THE FUCKING MACHINE IT'S FOR IMPATIENT PEOPLE LIKE ME!

[Death Metal Moe]

Seriously. Who the hell carries a checkbook with them? and why? You have debit card linked directly to your account. You can swipe and begin the transaction beore you are even done being rung up.
I am down to aboot 20 checks a year. And they are all for school fundraisers, Boy Scouts, Little Leauge, etc.
I even put the down payment to the wifes car on debit at the dealership.

It's the 21st century. Embrace it!

A REAL kick in the balls came this weekend in a small deli up near like Branchville or some shit. I was buying some Thuman's lunch meat. Then when I went to hand the old prick my debit card, he made a face like I has asked his daughter to date a negro and told me "I don't take credit cards, but I'll take a check."

Really? You'll take a fucking piece of paper that someone could much more easily forge over a credit card that automatically connects you to my bank account and creates a log of our transaction for your protection? I don't keep a lot of cash on me anymore, everyone takes debit or at least the credit on my debit card. So I had to ask my friends for 5 bucks just to pay the prick. I should have left the roast beef and cheese there and told him to cram them up his stoneaged ass.

And no, a "No Credit Cards Accepted" sign was not posted, I looked around as I was waiting for my friends to give me the 5 bucks and I instructed the prick "You should really hag that up somewhere champ."

[Death Metal Moe]

I am the self-checkout master at the grocery store. I love it and am out of there faster than the regular line.

THEY NEED TO FUCKING TEST PEOPLE OR SOMETHING before they let them use the self-checkout lanes. I fucking can't STAND it. Either its an old person that takes 30 minutes to scan 3 items or some dumb soccer mom who thinks its cute to let her kid try to scan all the times. LEARN HOW TO USE THE FUCKING MACHINE IT'S FOR IMPATIENT PEOPLE LIKE ME!

Oh my GOD is that fucking annoying too. But it's only partially the customer's fault. I too am THE KING of Self Check Out. I have all the screens memorize and hit the buttons before the computer is done talking. But there's one thing that can stop even efficient Self Check Out users.

The worst is when something in the computer system doesn't scan properly or there's some sort of approval pending, and that one person who's ONLY FUCKING JOB is to stand at the center computer by the self check out ISN'T AT THEIR MOTHERFUCKING POST. You ONLY have to stand there and clear my 'Waiting for Attendant' prompts douchebag! Get your shit together or go pump fucking gas with no benefits.

[nate1000]

Fixed it.

But really, everytime I see someone write a check, I have to remind myself that its not the year 1985.

Hey! That was no ordinary Subaru- that was a Death-Metal Subaru.

So there.

[A.J.]

I am the self-checkout master at the grocery store. I love it and am out of there faster than the regular line.

THEY NEED TO FUCKING TEST PEOPLE OR SOMETHING before they let them use the self-checkout lanes. I fucking can't STAND it. Either its an old person that takes 30 minutes to scan 3 items or some dumb soccer mom who thinks its cute to let her kid try to scan all the times. LEARN HOW TO USE THE FUCKING MACHINE IT'S FOR IMPATIENT PEOPLE LIKE ME!

I miss the old cash-only express lines. Now the express lines have the debit machines which keep me in line longer because the elderly can't master the machines and/or they feel compelled to argue the price of an item.

[Dougie Brootal]

Wow, it's no wonder we don't get along! Your story is so Don and Mike I can't believe you didn't like them. I bet your like those gay hating republicans tapping feet in public restrooms. Booosh!

http://www.luresfishing.com/spoon-baits/images/spoon-bait-003.jpg

[Arch Stanton]

http://bavatuesdays.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/06/lebowskicheck.jpg

Thread winning post!!!!

[DolaMight]

I am the self-checkout master at the grocery store. I love it and am out of there faster than the regular line.

some dumb soccer mom who thinks its cute to let her kid try to scan all the times.

I consider myself an expert too yet when my daughter's with me...

I'm a let the kid scan almost every item guy, knowingly ignoring the taps and shuhhs behind me. They're drowned out by the "ohh look, that's soo cute she's scanning her groceries like a big girl" 's from the other lines. Let her do it once, can't stop now.

[Terry-Two]

So I had to ask my friends for 5 bucks just to pay the prick. I should have left the roast beef and cheese there and told him to cram them up his stoneaged ass.

And no, a "No Credit Cards Accepted" sign was not posted, I looked around as I was waiting for my friends to give me the 5 bucks and I instructed the prick "You should really hag that up somewhere champ."



What kind of an adult walks around with less than $5?

[Thrice]

And no, a "No Credit Cards Accepted" sign was not posted, I looked around as I was waiting for my friends to give me the 5 bucks and I instructed the prick "You should really hag that up somewhere champ."

Did you happen to see a sign that said he DID take credit cards? Any sort of logo for any of the major credit card companies? You can't just assume all businesses take credit cards. But I guess now you know that...

[mikeyboy]

Wow, it's no wonder we don't get along! Your story is so Don and Mike I can't believe you didn't like them. I bet your like those gay hating republicans tapping feet in public restrooms. Booosh!

And you should talk. U murder any joke over the course of years. Go lick ass elsewhere. Seriously, you're sooo cute.

nope. and shutup male groupie

Not judging, but I hear these are great:

http://adweek.blogs.com/photos/uncategorized/tampax.jpg

You can apparently even go swimming or horseback riding.

[Death Metal Moe]

Did you happen to see a sign that said he DID take credit cards? Any sort of logo for any of the major credit card companies? You can't just assume all businesses take credit cards. But I guess now you know that...

Over the past decades, businesses have really been moving into the new age of credit and now debit cards. I almost unconsciously hand my card to people at registers all the time. I pay with credit and debit at MUCH smaller businesses than that, I don't think it was unreasonable of me to expet them to take a very common form of payment.

Not in the least.

[Death Metal Moe]

Not judging, but I hear these are great:

http://adweek.blogs.com/photos/uncategorized/tampax.jpg

You can apparently even go swimming or horseback riding.

And don't forget, "Wear White Shorts."

[SinA]

So I needed to go to the local Wal Mart... blah, blah, blah, I suck.


Wise words from great poets...

They’re turning kids into slaves just to make cheaper sneakers.
But what’s the real cost?
‘Cause the sneakers don’t seem that much cheaper.
Why are we still paying so much for sneakers
When you got them made by little slave kids
What are your overheads? (http://www.whatthefolk.net/hbolyrics.html#think)

[Death Metal Moe]

Wise words from great poets...

They’re turning kids into slaves just to make cheaper sneakers.
But what’s the real cost?
‘Cause the sneakers don’t seem that much cheaper.
Why are we still paying so much for sneakers
When you got them made by little slave kids
What are your overheads? (http://www.whatthefolk.net/hbolyrics.html#think)

YEA MAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!

http://media.urbandictionary.com/image/large/hippie-48540.jpg

[SinA]

YEA MAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!


I'm not a hippie. Not anymore, since I saw "Children of Men." I'm an anarchist, although believe it or not I got more respect in tie-dye. Plus the chicks were cuter.
http://mrzine.monthlyreview.org/ClownArmyDangerousAnarchists488.jpg