my life = the toilet?

[JPMNICK]

so yea i am drunk, but I think I am allowed to be

i got married 8 weeks ago and i left because my wife told me i was not allowed to see my family anymore. she is going to a lawyer tomorrow to get it annulled. then she is suing me for the cost of the wedding.

and to top it off, she cleared out our joint bank accounts and there is nothing i can do about it.

how am i this stupid

and as much as i love joking, at this point i just can not take any. if you do not have some words of wisdom or something else, do not even respond.

I am 26, and my life is in the toilet. I am back living with my parents, she took most of my cash and i have nothing to show for the last few years of my life.

so yea bar 9 this weekend anyone?

[Kevin]

Shit man.. I am really sorry...

How long have you known her before you decided to marry her... And why would she not allow you to see your family?? Man its stories like these that make me afraid to let myself fall in too deep with a girl... You just never really know a person..

All i can say is, get up dust yourself off, i know its hard.. But the worst thing you can do is wallow... Never harp on things you have no control of.. Just take it one step at a time, one day at a time, and slowly you will move on..

Hope that helped a bit...

[JPMNICK]

lived together for years, know each other since i was 20

[spoon]

Damn Nick I'm sorry man. Just try to calm down, vent with us and don't do anything big until some time has passed. You never know how it will eventually turn out and I don't know the facts of this whole thing. The bottom line is that if she's not meant to be with you, and I hate to say this, better now then after kids and you fall even deeper for her. It's harsh but you'll land on your feet and have a ton of friends here, along with in your outside life. It'll work out as best it can, just lean on your close friends and family. It's amazing how much you realize you love your family during times like this. I'm wishing you the best buddy.

Good luck.

[AngelAmy]

i said a lot of what i wanted to say already but I am still in shock over the news and terribly sorry this is happening to you. you know im always here if you need me. why do bad things happen to such good people? i wish i knew the answer to that. what she has done to you and is doing to you is just awful. you will bounce back from this, i know it. fight as much as you can.

just....im very sorry.

http://greyshaven.ipbfree.com/uploads/ipbfree.com/greyshaven/emo-huggles.gif

[spoon]

Hey Nick, I was going to hit the sack but if you want to chat I'll hang out for a while.

??

[JPMNICK]

Hey Nick, I was going to hit the sack but if you want to chat I'll hang out for a while.

??

thanks but i am going to go to bed too. i appreciate it for real though. i took off of work for the rest of the week and i am going to be dealing with all this.

thanks for the kind words so far

[PapaBear]

Wow, man. That's just really stunning. I feel terrible for you. I was going to ask what her problem is with your family, but fuck that. It's just wrong. Wow.

[spoon]

I'm sort of a pro bc my best friend from HS went through this and lost a couple mill in a (unfortunately) similar situation. He played 4 years of pro football and it ended bad with them as she took him to the bank. Thankfully his ties are all gone bc they weren't together too long and didn't have kids. In the end he's happy as shit now and it took time, but he found a real cool girl and is REALLY taking his time with her. Can't blame him in the least, but my point is it'll be over soon enough and you still have your health, family and time to move on. So remember that and it'll all work out in the end.

[spoon]

Oh and I got ur first beer/drink Saturday night at the 9.

[sailor]

that really sounds shitty. society really sucks sometimes.

[Don Stugots]

BEEN THERE TWICE. when i get home i will call you. stay strong, it gets alot worse before it gets better. trust me.

[Bulldogcakes]

Take the Don up on his offer. He's been through this twice.

Also, as bad as it is what just happened to you, it would be worse to be stuck in an unhappy marriage for the rest of your life. Plus, in your case at least there are no kids involved, so you'll be able to make a clean break. Look at it that way.

[Reephdweller]

Nick, man I'm really sorry to hear this. That is absolutely awful what she did to you. Like others have said, it totally sucks, but you need to start over and move on. Without a doubt we are here for you to help you through this.

[reillyluck]

I am really sorry you are going through this. in my opinion, she's taken enough already. From what i understood you both ended it mutually. She has people talking in her ear to do something like this.

This is one reason i hate most chicks. They can be so sweet then pull this crap. It sucks that you had to realize it now, but the good thing is you did realize it. Let her try to sue you. She wont get shit. Its bad enough that you both are dealing with this, now she's adding fuel to the flame...uggh!!! this is still new to her. Hopefully she will come to the realization that its not worth it and you both will end this amicable.

I think the best thing you did is take some time off of work to get your head clear. I did the same thing recently because of my situation. I dont have to get into detail as you already know. Just please try to stay focused.

you are a great guy, Nick. Everyone who knows you can vouch for that. You know if you want to talk, you know where to reach me. i know EXACTLY what youre going through.

[mendyweiss]

Friends, Family and a sense of humor can help to get you through rough times.
Hang in there !!

[Tall_James]

There are a lot of good people here who care about you and can speak to where you are now. Talk to them. Vent, scream - do whatever you have to. You WILL rise from this.

Until then, know that we are thinking about you and praying for you.

[King Hippos Bandaid]

Sorry to hear Niick

You are good people, You will bpunce back from this.

Like everyone else said , friends and family will be the best people to help you

:king:

[Bellyfullasnot]

Sorry to hear about what you are going through. Don't think of yourself as stupid. She jumped the rails, not you. Surround yourself with friends and family.

[Freitag]

Was there more problems stemming from this, or was it just the family deal?

Three things:

1) Lawyer up.

2) Protect your assets.

3) LAWYER UP.

[JPMNICK]

Was there more problems stemming from this, or was it just the family deal?

Three things:

1) Lawyer up.

2) Protect your assets.

3) LAWYER UP.

there were some other things, but not as big as the family thing

I already lawyered up and got whatever money she didn't locked away so it is impossible for her to touch. other than that i have no assets worth speaking of. luckily we did not own a house or have kids.

[moochcassidy]

sorry man..you got fucked over there.

cant remember who said it..mightve been ron...

"when a chick goes cold on you like that there's NOTHING you can do about it"

nothing you do now can make her do what you want. take the pressure off yourself and get drunk for a few days

[buzzard]

That truly sux ass! what I go through is nothing compared to you,as they whoever the hell they are say try to stay strong Nick! you've got a lot of friends around seek them out! My best to you! and regardless of what anyone tells you drinking does help.

[cupcakelove]

That's awful. I know everything will work out for you. There are a few things here you should be happy about. You didn't have any kids with her, you were only married 8 weeks, and you're still young. I know that doesn't really make you feel better right now, but it can't hurt to focus on the positive things.

[Dirtybird12]

Sorry to hear about your troubles dude. You won't always feel this way.
It'll pass. This kind of shit builds a better you in the end. It's just take a little time.
In the meantime do what I do, use this board & the people on it to distract yourself, listen to the buddys and drink if thats your thing. A few things to remember, this happens to everyone. Maybe on different levels, but we all go through this kinda stuff.
It's not really important HOW or WHY you find yourself in this situation. Nothing can reverse what happend. What is important is how you handle it and move on.
Embrace the pain bro. When a loved one splits, you are spose to feel this way.

[Leticia]

Ugh! holy geez.

I can't believe something like this would happen to you.

I'm really sorry things turned out this way, but I'm glad that you didn't find this out way later down the line when things could have been legally worse.

I really hope that you find a safe way to deal with all the crap you're gointhrough and I hope she doesn't fucking take all of your money! What the fuck man.

They can never have enough when they're ruining your lives...


I'll definitely see you Saturday and you'll get a huge hug with a slight humping from me. :down:

[spoon]

I'll definitely see you Saturday and you'll get a huge hug with a slight humping from me. :down:

See, things may be looking up already. Hang in there JP.

[drusilla]

i'm relly sorry to hear what you are going through. i just hope all of this doesn't make you jaded & prevents you from having a happy future. there are a lot of fucked up chicks out there, but we're not all like that & i hope you can find one to makes you happy & you get to enjoy life again.

[Friday]

**hug**

life is strange.

sometimes it sucks ass.

you know i am here for you, kiddo....

saturday will be fun times.... don't forget I am DD :)

[Gvac]

Nick, my man, trying to make sense of all the crap life throws our way is pure folly and will only make you more confused.

It is FAR easier said than done, but sometimes you've just got to accept whatever comes your way and try to figure out how to move on.

You've got an amazing support group here, full of people who genuinely care about you. That's gotta count for something.

[Furtherman]

Yea, I think we've all had our hearts stomped, swished, dragged, thrown against the wall, thrown into a woodchipper, keel hauled by a boat of angry pilots, plopped down on a glass coffee table while a sumo wrestler squa....

Or was that just me?

Anyway... take it a day at a time. We feel for you. Good luck.

[StupidGirlllll]

there were some other things, but not as big as the family thing

I already lawyered up and got whatever money she didn't locked away so it is impossible for her to touch. other than that i have no assets worth speaking of. luckily we did not own a house or have kids.

They said that newly married couples should never but a house until they are sure that it is going to work out. You did the right thing there bro.

[clockworkjoey]

5 years from now your going to remeber this but its not going to affect you day to day life. it sucks now but think about it, there is allways more money to be made and a new apartment to move into. you can allways get more stuff. if you end up paying for the wedding do it and get behind you as fast as possible. i think we all look like a fool once in our life sometimes twice. this will pass

and i think i'll check out bar 9 on friday

[Hottub]

Nick. I'm really sorry man. I've been thinking about you all day. For now, not much more to add that has not already been said.
You know what? It's gonna hurt like hell for a while. That's a fact. Try and keep yourself occupied.
And NEVER forget. This rag-tag bunch o' freaks known as RonFez.net has a ton of knowledge, experience, shoulders to lean on, and good ol' fashion love!
Feel free to use and abuse this vast font of wisdom. We are all here for you. No shit!

You've got my #

Tub.

[torker]

You're supposed to fuck up in your 20's. If you don't have kids, do the best you can with the money situation, and then walk away and don't look back.

[AngelAmy]

I'm like tub, I actually have been thinking about this all day. There is nothing anyone can say or do. It's so fucked up and it makes me so mad that not only one of my friends is going through this but one of the most amazing people I know is going through this. Don't be hard on yourself. There is no way you could have known that it was going to go this way. Just survive day by day and I just hope you will get your money back because I know how hard you have worked to save it all up. My offer stands from last night. If you need someone to talk to tell me when and where to be and I'll be there.

[sr71blackbird]

Jeez Nick, I am truly sorry to hear this. I cant imagine someone doing that. She must have been a real piece of work. Thank god you have your parents that you can rely on as give you shelter. I can imagine it is humiliating, but remember what comes around goes around and she will get hers. If you ever want to talk, I am here. It looks like you squared away whatever you could, so thats a good thing, plus you are smart and will survive this and find someone better and more deserving. Good luck bro!

[Reephdweller]

Nick, like Amy and Tub said this has been on my mind all day. One of my friends told me that legally she cannot take your money the way that she did. She may have it for now, but you should definitely fight like hell to get that back.

[FUNKMAN]

8 weeks, 8 years, 80 years, doesn't matter. when it's no good it's no good. Just learn a little something and move on with your life.

curious - was she the poker player?

[JPMNICK]

8 weeks, 8 years, 80 years, doesn't matter. when it's no good it's no good. Just learn a little something and move on with your life.

curious - was she the poker player?

yea that was her

thanks everyone for the kind words. i talked with the lawyers and the ball is in motion. a part of me feels a little better, but most of me is just depressed and sad. i am limiting myself to one night per week to get WASTED. got to try and keep it in control!

[mikeyboy]

I'm really sorry to hear this Nick. This may be a small consolation, but down the line you'll see that this is for the best. If a relationship isn't working, it's much better to learn that now rather than down the line when there is more at stake. I'm sorry you have to deal with the added stress involving money, but think of it this way, even though you have the uncertainty of a potential lawsuit, whatever money she has taken from you or may get in the near term is all she'll get. You're not going to have to worry about paying alimony or child support for years to come. Everything you do going forward is moving you in a positive direction towards getting your life back together.

It sucks hard right now, but it gets better, and you will be much happier. I have friends who have gone through similar things. Down the line, they are all much happier now and are glad to have gotten out of their poison relationships when they did.

Don't try to dwell too much if you can help it. Don't make snap decisions based on your emotions. Also, hit me up for a drink on Saturday.

[commish13]

It's threads like this that makes me wish I knew you all better. Instead of being able to sympathize, I'm just curious as to what happened that caused her to say you couldn't see your family any more, and if it just randomly came out of nowhere. That just strikes me as odd.

But that's obvious.

Sorry for kind of making it about me.

But yeah, time heals, as people said. Hell, just in the short time that this thread has been up, you've gone from being drunk and depressed to in a position to figure this stuff out and protect yourself. It still obviously hurts and sucks, but you're being proactive, and you've gotten it together in that manner in a very short amount of time. That in itself lends credence to time being able to heal and being able to help things get worked out.

Remember that it's okay to wallow if you have to, but don't let that take over. Wallow in it right now, even for an extended period over many days, just don't focus on only that. Get your emotions out and then move on.

[IamPixie]

I have no words. I'm sorry you're going through this right now. But I have to say you seem like a strong ,ambitious, well put together individual and I'm certain you'll get through this in time. Like previously stated you have us here for what it's worth. We love you Nick.

[Freitag]

...why do people even have joint bank accounts in this day and age?

[IamPixie]

dude, what's done has been done. Why twist the knife?

[Freitag]

dude, what's done has been done. Why twist the knife?

Sorry, I wasn't bashing or anything. Never mind.

[Gmann]

Im really sorry for what happened to you. Just gotta chalk this up as to a life experience and suck it up as best you can. Things will get better man. You're a spry young man. You'll be back on your feet in no time my friend. Right now, take solace in the support of your friends here on the board. Every little bit of love from people helps.

[sailor]

...why do people even have joint bank accounts in this day and age?

because they're married?

[JPMNICK]

because they're married?

yea it was our wedding gifts plus money we put in every month to pay our bills like rent, cell phone, cable etc.

[sailor]

yea it was our wedding gifts plus money we put in every month to pay our bills like rent, cell phone, cable etc.

it just seemed crazy and paranoid to think a married couple should never have a joint account. really sucks that it would have helped you tho'

[Kris10]

This is one reason i hate most chicks. They can be so sweet then pull this crap.

This is EXACTLY what I said to someone on the board last week that I hung out with, I don't trust chicks at all! I have very few females friends because I know how women can be and because of that I don't trust many of them.

I'm sorry your going through this shit Nick, if you need anything let me know.

[Skellington]

If i wasn't 4 hours away, i'd come buy you a drink. Chin up, it may take time, but your life will come back together.

[JustJon]

Dude, that blows, but you'll get thru it.

[Lumber]

Damn...I know of a nice girl you could call!!! I think you may know her !!! Sorry to hear that....

[Justice4all]

Wow Nick. I just read this and I do not know what else to say to console you other then I am sorry.

One thing you SHOULD do is get the copy of the bank records for yourself and your lawyer so you know just how much she took from you before she left. And I would not worry about her suing you for anything. She does not have a leg to stand on as far as that is concerned. No court in the land would grant her anything like that. She was trying to rattle your cage.

Make sure there is nothing else she can either steal or cash in.
I hate to admit it, but this bitch really pissed me off for what she did to you.
This is the SECOND TIME she went total psycho on you. This hits close to home with me because my ex tried like hell to keep me from my friends and family (ask Crippler...he was witness to it all).

Nick you are as decent of a fellow as anyone could hope to be. It is a testament to you for all the people who are circling around you and supporting you.
If you need ANYTHING you know how to get in touch with me.
And if ya want to get drunk once a week....gimme a call. There are plenty of bars to hit between us.

Good luck and I hope you can make her eat shit before this is all over with.
She does not deserve you. You are too good of a man for her.

By the way, you might want to bring up the first time she did this to the laywer. Maybe that might help with your case.

Quick question though.....have you heard from her FAMILY at all?

[Lumber]

Damn Nick!!! What the hell set her off???...........I can give you directions to S.I. if you don`t remember! Damn...:nono: