Kathleen From The Bronx
10-11-2007, 02:38 AM
Dear Ron and Fez Shooow,
Everybody watch out!!! The Big Cat is on the prowl....and mind his claws.....
I am loving, loving Fez Marie Whatley's newly appointed role as executive producer of The Ron and Fez Show! I am in full support of the new Fezzie Administration and the newborn feeling in the air....of...dare I say it.... straight up moxie! There is a certain feline fearlessness, prowess and guts that I notice...along with not-so-thinly veiled threats of danger and cantankerousness if the wishes of the new E.P. are not heeded..... I'm thinkin that the staff best be up on their toes, cause from the sounds of it, if they are not....yikes! They will find themselves in a world of cat-shit! "Long live the Big Cat and his glorious regime!!!" That's what I'm screamin....
The Big Cat..... I wonder.... hmmmm.... It occurred to me... Is this Fez Whatley indeed a big cat, or perhaps indeed a wolf in cat's clothing?? He reminds me of a wolf...Stop lookin at me like that! I know that wolves and cats are not related.... I'm sayin, Winston Wolfe...."The Wolf," Pulp Fiction, you know what I mean! Substitute, "cat," for, "wolf," and their messages could be twins..
"I'm The Big Cat.... I solve problems." You see what I'm sayin..?
Just like The Wolf's attitude, " Let's get down to brass tacks, gentlemen. If I was informed correctly, the clock is ticking, is that right??" Fezzie got down to business right outta the gate, beckoning for Pepper Hicks to come in, "A.S.A.P.," so that he could hear what the E.P. had to say about the Vaselines song he played for the opener... "What THE HELL was that opening song?!" The Big Cat hissed..."This eccentric stuff; it stops NOW! Play something that somebody on the planet Earth knows....not your personal weirdo loves of music!!!"
Hooooly Shit! I have to say man, I always tend to dig the tunes that Pepper picks.....but the overall tone of that talkin-to had me just rollin..........and again I will reference The Wolf.... "If I'm curt with you it's because time is a factor. I think fast, I talk fast and I need you guys to act fast if you wanna get out of this. So, pretty please... with sugar on top....."
I wanna tell yez, I really thought today's Guy Guyerson talkin the sports was pretty killa... I particularly enjoyed that Ron refused to announce him by his name and called him, "Gina Gershon," instead..... I am diggin the emergence of bizarrely sung jingles as of late....This time there was one for Buddy Lymon's Lemon Shop....Slightly eerie! What really made me snort-laugh was, "Mr. Woman, Mary Jo Fernandez...." What the hell!?! "Baby likes to cry, sports talk in your eye!"
Oh this reminds me.... real quick..... This made me laugh so hard today too... Red-headed hate! For real..... Maybe I SHOULD feel outraged... but I do not... This constant reaction would probably make me a self-hating redhead...... What, am I seriously gonna bring up red-head topics everyday this week? Yes... it appears to be so... Well, ya know how Dave was all strangely jealous of his pal Pat who is up for some Cosmo Bachelor of the year thingy? Yeah... well when he was talkin about how his friend would be stopped and asked to model for Abercrombie and Fitch.... I laughed my arse off when Ronnie was stated that the only modeling Dave could do would be for Wendy's....or for some kinda spin on Raggedy Ann and Andy!
For real, I have a question though.... Did anyone ever love their Raggedy Ann doll?? In the history of life has it happened? Everyone seemed to have them around and I've never seen a kid just huggin and loving her....I can't really explain it but I always felt like, "What?? What are you even doing here??" I seemed to resent...like a raggedy redheaded step-child......"Nice triangle nose and yarn-hair, Ann." Maybe I too look too much like Raggedy Ann to make it in this world of people with skin pigment..... Maybe that's why nobody hugged and loved ME as a child.....Gluurg....... I may have just had a breakthrough right here in this blog.... Uuhhhh... but where was I goin wit... Ah yes! Well, so Dave was proclaiming that he was just as rugged as this Pat fella..... and he yells, "Just look at my face!" and in less than a split second Ron fires back, "but to do that I'd have to turn out the lights first!" That killed me..... As everyone laughed Ron pointed out, "I know, I'm quick." Yeah man... That's true! I'm always sayin that Ronnie B. is fast.... "Fast as the mind of God!" I've been known to repeat....
Anyway.... when Sports Talk was all done, Ronnie pointed out that Fez was takin notes on his official E.P. clipboard.... The Big Cat announced, and it sounded kinda scary, that, "OH there WILL be post-show meetings!" It just cackles me, I tell ya! There seemed an inflection that if he didn't like what he was hearing from Dave or, "the junior producer," Earl Douglas.... that, "Monster Joe's gonna be disposing of two bodies"..... OK, for real I'll stop with the Winston Wolfe/Big Cat comparisons.... It's enough already....
Forgive me though, I must rattle on more about the new cat in town.... There's talk on the street; it sounds so familiar...... Great expectations, everybody's watching you...... People you meet, they all seem to know you..... Even your old friends treat you like you're something new...... Fezzie come lately, The New Cat in town.....Everybody loves you, so don't let them down...........
You also must forgive my utter despicable hypocrisy in quoting an abominable and appalling Eagles song.....cause I HATE them...... but... ya know... come on..... let's just keep talkin.....
There's no way that this new cat will let anyone down.... I mean, I heard that, "Memo from the E.P.," today! Completely inspired confidence..... Oh, Ronnie... I'll tell you all about it cause you always seem to miss these things!
This brassy new E.P. of yours has been in radio since he was 21 years old.....So he's been in the business about five years, "So I KNOW what I'm doing," he assured.... He also affirmed that he would be making BIG changes..... The 25% parties that your last producer would throw, (or not) are kaputski! "I'm not buyin you people Rolexes and flying you to Hawaii..... I'm not Oprah!" he said, layin down the law.......AND... he guaranteed that the work environment would be a safe place for women.....Unlike the last producer, he pledged that he will not fall in love with or threaten any one of em.... In fact, the new E.P. went so far as to say, "TRUST ME! You'll have to point out to me that a woman is even in the room! .... I don't see sex.....especially girl sex." Wow..... this young go-getter is all business!
I was especially impressed with the fact that The Big Cat plans to enact what he called, "A Triple-A Policy....A- Answers; you will get answers!!! A- Action; Things will happen!!! A- Anti-depressants.. I have an effexor problem right now!!" That almost sounded like a cheer.....I pictured him jumping each time into the "A," position for every policy point..... Maybe he did one of those sassy little kicks at the end of it all too... That kid's got pep!! Yup... That's one cheer-leading cat...... Ahhhh such an impassioned an eloquent speech...I really fuckin enjoyed it.. I don't know about the rest of yez.... but I'm buyin it! You know what else I loved and was impressed with?? I'll tell you.... Besides sending this memo of his to Don Wicklin and Eric Logan.... he also sent it to Bob Dylan.
See, I am not sure if you guys are aware of this, but I CC: all my emails and wacky forwards, and psychotic manifestos to Bob as well! That's some coincidence, huh!?? Yeah.... What was pretty kooky though was today, ole Bob must have sent me a copy of his response to Fezzie's memo by accident.... or maybe he meant to... I dunno...... You know he's brilliant and mysterious! The nutty thing is that he also CC'ed it to Jeff Lynne and Tome Petty as well! I have to say... I mean, I know it's pretty silly....but I found myself feeling deeply honored to see my dopey email address nestled right in there next to theirs......and it made me wonder....Is Bob Dylan is finally gonna put them Traveling Wilburys back together with yours truly taking the place of both Roy Orbison and George Harrison...... I mean, I HAVE reminded him that I was up for that task at least once a week for about a year now. Oooh anyway.... we'll see, huh?
So yeah..... I thought that Bob Dylan's email back to Fezzie was just lovely..... Oh I know you guys have already read it.... but it's so nice how bout yez read it twice? I'll copy and paste....
----- Original Message ----
From: <bobdylan@geniustown.com>
To: Absolutely Fez Marie
Sent: Wednesday, October 10, 2007 4:23:07 PM
Subject: Re: Memo from the E.P.
Our conversation was short and sweet.....It nearly swept me offa my feet......And I'm back in the rain, oh, oh.......And you are on dry land......You made it there somehow.....You're The Big Cat now......
-Bob Dylan
Awwwwww!!! I mean.... That Bob Dylan! Garsh..... So anyway, looks like I'm not the only one who is feelin like the reign of Fez Whatley, The E.P.; The Big Cat is so exciting that it's cause to sing......
Anyway buddies..... Dug the show today as always.... See yezzz....
Signed,
kathleen from the bronx :):):)
Everybody watch out!!! The Big Cat is on the prowl....and mind his claws.....
I am loving, loving Fez Marie Whatley's newly appointed role as executive producer of The Ron and Fez Show! I am in full support of the new Fezzie Administration and the newborn feeling in the air....of...dare I say it.... straight up moxie! There is a certain feline fearlessness, prowess and guts that I notice...along with not-so-thinly veiled threats of danger and cantankerousness if the wishes of the new E.P. are not heeded..... I'm thinkin that the staff best be up on their toes, cause from the sounds of it, if they are not....yikes! They will find themselves in a world of cat-shit! "Long live the Big Cat and his glorious regime!!!" That's what I'm screamin....
The Big Cat..... I wonder.... hmmmm.... It occurred to me... Is this Fez Whatley indeed a big cat, or perhaps indeed a wolf in cat's clothing?? He reminds me of a wolf...Stop lookin at me like that! I know that wolves and cats are not related.... I'm sayin, Winston Wolfe...."The Wolf," Pulp Fiction, you know what I mean! Substitute, "cat," for, "wolf," and their messages could be twins..
"I'm The Big Cat.... I solve problems." You see what I'm sayin..?
Just like The Wolf's attitude, " Let's get down to brass tacks, gentlemen. If I was informed correctly, the clock is ticking, is that right??" Fezzie got down to business right outta the gate, beckoning for Pepper Hicks to come in, "A.S.A.P.," so that he could hear what the E.P. had to say about the Vaselines song he played for the opener... "What THE HELL was that opening song?!" The Big Cat hissed..."This eccentric stuff; it stops NOW! Play something that somebody on the planet Earth knows....not your personal weirdo loves of music!!!"
Hooooly Shit! I have to say man, I always tend to dig the tunes that Pepper picks.....but the overall tone of that talkin-to had me just rollin..........and again I will reference The Wolf.... "If I'm curt with you it's because time is a factor. I think fast, I talk fast and I need you guys to act fast if you wanna get out of this. So, pretty please... with sugar on top....."
I wanna tell yez, I really thought today's Guy Guyerson talkin the sports was pretty killa... I particularly enjoyed that Ron refused to announce him by his name and called him, "Gina Gershon," instead..... I am diggin the emergence of bizarrely sung jingles as of late....This time there was one for Buddy Lymon's Lemon Shop....Slightly eerie! What really made me snort-laugh was, "Mr. Woman, Mary Jo Fernandez...." What the hell!?! "Baby likes to cry, sports talk in your eye!"
Oh this reminds me.... real quick..... This made me laugh so hard today too... Red-headed hate! For real..... Maybe I SHOULD feel outraged... but I do not... This constant reaction would probably make me a self-hating redhead...... What, am I seriously gonna bring up red-head topics everyday this week? Yes... it appears to be so... Well, ya know how Dave was all strangely jealous of his pal Pat who is up for some Cosmo Bachelor of the year thingy? Yeah... well when he was talkin about how his friend would be stopped and asked to model for Abercrombie and Fitch.... I laughed my arse off when Ronnie was stated that the only modeling Dave could do would be for Wendy's....or for some kinda spin on Raggedy Ann and Andy!
For real, I have a question though.... Did anyone ever love their Raggedy Ann doll?? In the history of life has it happened? Everyone seemed to have them around and I've never seen a kid just huggin and loving her....I can't really explain it but I always felt like, "What?? What are you even doing here??" I seemed to resent...like a raggedy redheaded step-child......"Nice triangle nose and yarn-hair, Ann." Maybe I too look too much like Raggedy Ann to make it in this world of people with skin pigment..... Maybe that's why nobody hugged and loved ME as a child.....Gluurg....... I may have just had a breakthrough right here in this blog.... Uuhhhh... but where was I goin wit... Ah yes! Well, so Dave was proclaiming that he was just as rugged as this Pat fella..... and he yells, "Just look at my face!" and in less than a split second Ron fires back, "but to do that I'd have to turn out the lights first!" That killed me..... As everyone laughed Ron pointed out, "I know, I'm quick." Yeah man... That's true! I'm always sayin that Ronnie B. is fast.... "Fast as the mind of God!" I've been known to repeat....
Anyway.... when Sports Talk was all done, Ronnie pointed out that Fez was takin notes on his official E.P. clipboard.... The Big Cat announced, and it sounded kinda scary, that, "OH there WILL be post-show meetings!" It just cackles me, I tell ya! There seemed an inflection that if he didn't like what he was hearing from Dave or, "the junior producer," Earl Douglas.... that, "Monster Joe's gonna be disposing of two bodies"..... OK, for real I'll stop with the Winston Wolfe/Big Cat comparisons.... It's enough already....
Forgive me though, I must rattle on more about the new cat in town.... There's talk on the street; it sounds so familiar...... Great expectations, everybody's watching you...... People you meet, they all seem to know you..... Even your old friends treat you like you're something new...... Fezzie come lately, The New Cat in town.....Everybody loves you, so don't let them down...........
You also must forgive my utter despicable hypocrisy in quoting an abominable and appalling Eagles song.....cause I HATE them...... but... ya know... come on..... let's just keep talkin.....
There's no way that this new cat will let anyone down.... I mean, I heard that, "Memo from the E.P.," today! Completely inspired confidence..... Oh, Ronnie... I'll tell you all about it cause you always seem to miss these things!
This brassy new E.P. of yours has been in radio since he was 21 years old.....So he's been in the business about five years, "So I KNOW what I'm doing," he assured.... He also affirmed that he would be making BIG changes..... The 25% parties that your last producer would throw, (or not) are kaputski! "I'm not buyin you people Rolexes and flying you to Hawaii..... I'm not Oprah!" he said, layin down the law.......AND... he guaranteed that the work environment would be a safe place for women.....Unlike the last producer, he pledged that he will not fall in love with or threaten any one of em.... In fact, the new E.P. went so far as to say, "TRUST ME! You'll have to point out to me that a woman is even in the room! .... I don't see sex.....especially girl sex." Wow..... this young go-getter is all business!
I was especially impressed with the fact that The Big Cat plans to enact what he called, "A Triple-A Policy....A- Answers; you will get answers!!! A- Action; Things will happen!!! A- Anti-depressants.. I have an effexor problem right now!!" That almost sounded like a cheer.....I pictured him jumping each time into the "A," position for every policy point..... Maybe he did one of those sassy little kicks at the end of it all too... That kid's got pep!! Yup... That's one cheer-leading cat...... Ahhhh such an impassioned an eloquent speech...I really fuckin enjoyed it.. I don't know about the rest of yez.... but I'm buyin it! You know what else I loved and was impressed with?? I'll tell you.... Besides sending this memo of his to Don Wicklin and Eric Logan.... he also sent it to Bob Dylan.
See, I am not sure if you guys are aware of this, but I CC: all my emails and wacky forwards, and psychotic manifestos to Bob as well! That's some coincidence, huh!?? Yeah.... What was pretty kooky though was today, ole Bob must have sent me a copy of his response to Fezzie's memo by accident.... or maybe he meant to... I dunno...... You know he's brilliant and mysterious! The nutty thing is that he also CC'ed it to Jeff Lynne and Tome Petty as well! I have to say... I mean, I know it's pretty silly....but I found myself feeling deeply honored to see my dopey email address nestled right in there next to theirs......and it made me wonder....Is Bob Dylan is finally gonna put them Traveling Wilburys back together with yours truly taking the place of both Roy Orbison and George Harrison...... I mean, I HAVE reminded him that I was up for that task at least once a week for about a year now. Oooh anyway.... we'll see, huh?
So yeah..... I thought that Bob Dylan's email back to Fezzie was just lovely..... Oh I know you guys have already read it.... but it's so nice how bout yez read it twice? I'll copy and paste....
----- Original Message ----
From: <bobdylan@geniustown.com>
To: Absolutely Fez Marie
Sent: Wednesday, October 10, 2007 4:23:07 PM
Subject: Re: Memo from the E.P.
Our conversation was short and sweet.....It nearly swept me offa my feet......And I'm back in the rain, oh, oh.......And you are on dry land......You made it there somehow.....You're The Big Cat now......
-Bob Dylan
Awwwwww!!! I mean.... That Bob Dylan! Garsh..... So anyway, looks like I'm not the only one who is feelin like the reign of Fez Whatley, The E.P.; The Big Cat is so exciting that it's cause to sing......
Anyway buddies..... Dug the show today as always.... See yezzz....
Signed,
kathleen from the bronx :):):)