Climbing under a deck...

[angrymissy]

I have to climb under my back deck. I live on a canal, so my deck is raised a bit and right next to the water. We have a feral cat colony that I take care of... one of the cats I couldn't trap had kittens a month ago, and I just caught her moving them under my deck. If I can get the kittens in the next week, I can socialize them and make them normal cats who are tame and they can be adopted. If not, they join the feral cat colony that is already too large and lounging on my deck pissing off the neighbors.

Now, I am not claustrophobic. What I am worried about is what kind of fucking shit lives under my deck. What the hell is going to be under there Oracle? There is a raccoon family that visits us... are they going to be fucking sleeping under the deck during the day and bite my face off when I wake them? What about SNAKES and bugs??? WHAT AM I GOING TO FIND UNDER THERE ORACLE AND HOW CAN I PREPARE FOR MY MISSION.

[Ritalin]

I predict that Billy Staples is living under your deck, half covered in moss and muttering under his breath about his "precious".

[BMoses]

Go to a hardware store and buy disposable coveralls

[mendyweiss]

Take that big kitchen knife with you.

[Furtherman]

Two nine year old boys playing monster rain.

[topless_mike]

i doubt you'd have coons livin under your deck.
they prefer low income housing...


oh wait.

i mean, if you have cats under there, i highly doubt raccoons and cats would co-habitate.

just do what you can. a cat colony can often lead to a FIP breakout, which is not good.

you are a keeper.
you really go all out for pussy.

[angrymissy]

i doubt you'd have coons livin under your deck.
they prefer low income housing...

oh wait.

i mean, if you have cats under there, i highly doubt raccoons and cats would co-habitate.

just do what you can. a cat colony can often lead to a FIP breakout, which is not good.

you are a keeper.
you really go all out for pussy.

The raccoons eat with the cats at night... it's weird. Yeah, I'm trying to keep this colony down to the 3 kittens from the last litter and the mom and dad (who does not come around a lot). Thats why I want to get these new kittens before they go totally feral. I trap them, get them fixed and they get their shots and an exam. I have two kittens from the last litter left to trap. We actually have an insulated cat house coming for them thats made just for ferals.

[Bellyfullasnot]

My Uncle Ted was always worried about "Cat Scratch Fever".

[envirogator]

We have a division in my company that does all types of confined space entries (insert joke and laff and laff here). When the guys are going into areas with suspected creepy crawlies they always start with a loud noise (air horn) and bring lots of lights. You can get an air horn at the hardware store for about 5 bucks.

[FUNKMAN]

WHAT AM I GOING TO FIND UNDER THERE

cards and a hand

and a few lingering spiders ready to make their final death bite :tongue:

[TheMojoPin]

If you've got those disgusting beasts already hanging out ON the deck, Lord only knows what is living UNDER it. I'd call animal control and leave it up to them.

[lleeder]

Thats scary. You won't see me going under no deck.

[TooLowBrow]

if any animal bites you, you will just develop super animal-like abilities. since Halloween is over you can pick up a costume cheap

[extracheese]

One strong potent dose of poison will rid you of your problem altogether. No raccoons, feral cats, rats, snakes, spiders or anything. Think of the peace, safety, and cleanliness. Think of the happy neighbors. Its win-win.

[TooLowBrow]

One strong potent dose of poison will rid you of your problem altogether. No raccoons, feral cats, rats, snakes, spiders or anything. Think of the peace, safety, and cleanliness. Think of the happy neighbors. Its win-win.

odd as it may seem, i think she may have... feelings... for these feral felines

[reillyluck]

easy. Make Jeff do it.

no harm will come to the lovely Missy. :happy:

[TheMojoPin]

One strong potent dose of poison will rid you of your problem altogether. No raccoons, feral cats, rats, snakes, spiders or anything. Think of the peace, safety, and cleanliness. Think of the happy neighbors. Its win-win.

"Your ideas are intriguing to me, and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter."

[BoondockSaint]

easy. Make Jeff do it.

no harm will come to the lovely Missy. :happy:

Yeah, couldn't he just limbo under there?

[Hottub]

Yeah, couldn't he just limbo under there?

Hey, Boonie...
Ding Ding Ding.
http://www.byrum.org/aol/pyramid.jpg

[donnie_darko]

burn than and sam's last show and throw it under, nothing will survive I assure you.

[TheMojoPin]

OK, serious question...what DO your neighbors think about you guys basically encouraging feral cats to hang out in the neighborhood?

[torker]

WHAT AM I GOING TO FIND UNDER THERE ORACLE
Buzz Meeks.

[TheMojoPin]

Buzz Meeks.

Nice!

[RADIO-SHARK]

cats feral or not keep the rodent population down.

[Tenbatsuzen]

Asps. Very dangerous. You go first.

[IMSlacker]

If you see Fat_Sunny under there, tell him to please come back to the board. We all miss him terribly.

[FMJeff]

OK, serious question...what DO your neighbors think about you guys basically encouraging feral cats to hang out in the neighborhood?

There are really only 4 of them. The mother cat was here and pregnant when I moved in. I have two more to catch and spay and then that number will not grow any longer. I'm not exactly encouraging them, I'm reducing the amount of litters they have by catching, fixing and releasing. If I didn't do that, there would be tons more cats around.

The only neighbor that seems to have an issue with it, lives across the canal from us and has 2 gigantic pit bulls that bark fucking constantly, so she can go screw. All she has done is ask if we take care of the cats adn can't we get them adopted.

I can't let them sit on my deck and starve, or have them taken to the pound and put down.

EDIT - THIS IS MISSY NOT JEFF

[A.J.]

Buzz Meeks.

:clap: