The Spoils of War??

[joethebartender]

I was out on a limo gig last night (not behind the stick). I've got a good thing going with the owner of this limo company and sometimes I can take a car out at a very discounted rate. This usually happens when the guy is strapped for pocket cash and he doesn't want his wife to know about the transaction. (more cash for Joe...)
Tonight I was taking 4 couples to a dinner and then to a club on rt. 46. I knew one of the guys. Everyone was in their mid-twenties.
When i picked them up, they loaded up the bar in the limo as if we were going out for a few days instead of an evening. Between the first stop and the club everyone was lit from the open bar at the dinner and whatever they consumed on the way. The twenty-something, jersey guy, attitudes started coming out in the 4 guys and the girls were just smashed, it took at least 30 minutes everytime I had to get them all back into the car.
At the end of the night there was no puking or anything just a bit of a mess from empties and glasses. (They behaved.) I was paid for the car and I was tipped very well. But after they got out at the last stop, this was what was left in the back of the car:

1/2 bottle of Ketel One
1 bottle luna di luna pinot grigio
1 bottle santa margarita p.g.
1 bottle of chianti
12 coronas
a pair of Victoria's Secret black lace panties (size m)...and NO I didn't (I tried but I have a cold.)
a pair of black nylons (in same small plastic bag as the panties)
3 red bulls
1/2 bottle of Moet (which is gone...I pounded it while I was cleaning, as it was still on ice)
5 yuenglings
3/4 gallon of cranberry juice
1 dozen long stemmed roses
a full bottle of Aqua di Gio cologne
and $.91 in change on the floor.

Now do I call them up and tell them about all of this stuff? OR...are these the spoils of war?

Love,
-Joe

[TeeBone]

Great story, Joe. Keep the change and unmentionables. It sounds like that isn't the first time those girls have been in a precarious position that includes a Saturday morning conversation starter, "have you seen my panties?"
War - What is it good for? In this case, not absolutely nothing; but rather 91 cents in change, a pair of panties, awful cologne and a great yarn.

[Chigworthy]

If they were tools, fuck 'em.

[lleeder]

Great story keep the shit. They were probably so hung over that they wouldnt even care about what alcohol was left.

[epo]

Keep it all.

In my experiences, when you use a limo anything you leave behind (outside of something accidental, like a wallet)...you should not expect to see ever again.

[sailor]

since you knew one of the guys, maybe hold the stuff for a week in case they ask? if they ever bring it up after that time has gone by, tell them it was tossed. it would be unreasonable for them to expect their junk to be held longer than that.

[jauble]

since you knew one of the guys, maybe hold the stuff for a week in case they ask? if they ever bring it up after that time has gone by, tell them it was tossed. it would be unreasonable for them to expect their junk to be held longer than that.

what sailor said

[Ritalin]

since you knew one of the guys, maybe hold the stuff for a week in case they ask? if they ever bring it up after that time has gone by, tell them it was tossed. it would be unreasonable for them to expect their junk to be held longer than that.

Wise wise sailor

[JimBeam]

I say contact them and mention maybe the panties, the roses and the $0.91 but the liquor is yours.

If they wanted it they should've kept it.

If they mention the liquor act like there wasn't anything left.

[SatCam]

drink the drinks, throw out the roses, put the change in your cup holder and try on the panties

[mildly amusing]

what...all that and no blow....keep it anyway...

[joethebartender]

I got a call asking for a recap of the night's events. I told the guy about the stuff left behind but he was only concerned with the cologne. It seems that the guy of the couple in the front of the car (closest to me) passed out and that his chick started getting the guy that I know off on the way home...right in front of his chick. Now u can imagine how wasted they all were.:ohmy:

[Chigworthy]

Sounds like a bunch of sodomites; keep their loot.

[torker]

two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a saltshaker half-full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, laughers, screamers... Also, a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of beer, a pint of raw ether, and two dozen amyls

[Bellyfullasnot]

The company I work for requires us to enter the cabin @ the last stop and make sure "nothing" is left behind. Unopened beers, red bulls, sodas are mine. Bottles of booze, clothing, and cologne would be returned. If they're too drunk to grab it, I'll leave it on their stoop. Sounds like you had a good night. Friday night ended with a domestic dispute and no tip, saturday ended with a few extra bucks but 2 chicks puking from NYC til suffolk co.
They hit the bucket not the car but it was still a pain in the ass.

[foodcourtdruide]

I was out on a limo gig last night (not behind the stick). I've got a good thing going with the owner of this limo company and sometimes I can take a car out at a very discounted rate. This usually happens when the guy is strapped for pocket cash and he doesn't want his wife to know about the transaction. (more cash for Joe...)
Tonight I was taking 4 couples to a dinner and then to a club on rt. 46. I knew one of the guys. Everyone was in their mid-twenties.
When i picked them up, they loaded up the bar in the limo as if we were going out for a few days instead of an evening. Between the first stop and the club everyone was lit from the open bar at the dinner and whatever they consumed on the way. The twenty-something, jersey guy, attitudes started coming out in the 4 guys and the girls were just smashed, it took at least 30 minutes everytime I had to get them all back into the car.
At the end of the night there was no puking or anything just a bit of a mess from empties and glasses. (They behaved.) I was paid for the car and I was tipped very well. But after they got out at the last stop, this was what was left in the back of the car:

1/2 bottle of Ketel One
1 bottle luna di luna pinot grigio
1 bottle santa margarita p.g.
1 bottle of chianti
12 coronas
a pair of Victoria's Secret black lace panties (size m)...and NO I didn't (I tried but I have a cold.)
a pair of black nylons (in same small plastic bag as the panties)
3 red bulls
1/2 bottle of Moet (which is gone...I pounded it while I was cleaning, as it was still on ice)
5 yuenglings
3/4 gallon of cranberry juice
1 dozen long stemmed roses
a full bottle of Aqua di Gio cologne
and $.91 in change on the floor.

Now do I call them up and tell them about all of this stuff? OR...are these the spoils of war?

Love,
-Joe

Great story. I'm torn on this. On one hand, I say always do the classy thing. If the world wasn't so cut throat, we'd all be better off in the end. However, you aren't their daddy. They should be more responsible and not rely on a limo driver to take care of them.

Here's my suggestion. If you feel the urge to drink any of the booze, just drink it. If they want it back you could just buy it. It's not like a can of red bull is irreplacable. Roses don't last more than about a week, so you could keep them in your car as decoration or give them to a lady friend. Again, not irreplacable and worst comes to worst you buy another dozen roses.

The cologne is the most expensive item on your list. I'd hold on to that for a week or two, and if you don't hear anything it's yours.

The panties/nylons really aren't your responsibility, but what exactly would you do with them? I say hold on to them for a couple weeks in a drawer somewhere, if they don't call just toss them.. or dress up in them, whatever you want.

It's not your responsibility AT ALL to call them and tell them what they left. They left easily replacable goods, due to their own irresonsibility. These aren't your friends, they're just people that used a service. If they had left something of great value or something difficult to replace (ie, ss card, passport, drivers license, credit card, cell phone) then I'd say give them a call, just to be a decent human being.

[Bellyfullasnot]

I respectfully disagree with Foodcourtdruid. The goal is to not only have the cust. call the limo company back, but to request the same driver. This will only happen If they feel safe and comfortable with the driver. Everybody knows @ least one bad limo story. The goal is to keep the wheels spinning. A stretch suv for 18 people 8 hrs comes out to almost $1000.
A regular stretch is almost half that. The driver gets @ least 20% towards his pay. Why fuck it up?

[foodcourtdruide]

I respectfully disagree with Foodcourtdruid. The goal is to not only have the cust. call the limo company back, but to request the same driver. This will only happen If they feel safe and comfortable with the driver. Everybody knows @ least one bad limo story. The goal is to keep the wheels spinning. A stretch suv for 18 people 8 hrs comes out to almost $1000.
A regular stretch is almost half that. The driver gets @ least 20% towards his pay. Why fuck it up?

Ah, you sold me. As a business man, returning the stuff makes the most sense. I wasn't thinking about return business in my post above.

On a side note, being a limo driver sounds awesome. When you sit in a cubicle all day, you fantasize about adventurous jobs, that include interactions with other human beings. Being a limo driver sounds really cool.