I Need To Develop A Thicker Skin...

[Reephdweller]

By thicker skin I don't mean physical skin - but rather being better able to handle emotionally sensitive things. My biggest problem, my boss. He's the kind of guy who is a master at psychologically fucking with people. He takes pleasure in pitting people against one another and strategizing turmoil in a grand chess like fashion. The problem for me is that I get way too sensitive to it all when it's on me, and I internalize it. I need to brush off his bullshit and move on with my day but instead he'll do or say something that will drive me nuts later. It's getting to the point now that I've had it and I'd like to leave, but on one level I don't want to give him the satisfaction and on another I want to learn to move beyond it but I don't know how. How to take it, shrug it off and move on.

He'll say things in a critical way that will get to me. Or he'll say something to someone else that makes it's way to me, sometimes he designs it that way so that it's an indirect attack, or he'll do something to someone else that ultimately has an effect on me. It's one thing or another. There will be times when he'll focus on someone or something else and it's easy to get by, but right now I'm in his crosshairs and I need to emotionally figure out how to get beyond it.

Overall, I think I'm pretty good at shrugging things off from most people, but I don't know what it is with him that makes it harder for me.

[TooLowBrow]

c'mon, your sn is reephdweller... just float

[Reephdweller]

I'd love to be the same Reefy at work, but it's not so easy.

[AngelAmy]

It's horrible that the world makes people like you feel like they need to change. You are perfect, it is them who should change. (this sentance doesn't look right but I don't know how to fix it so now I just look like a tool) There is no exchuse for the way your boss treats you. You know how I feel about everyone at your job and the way they treat you. You don't deserve it. You don't need thicker skin. They are the ones who need to show you some respect.

[Reephdweller]

I'm slowly coming to the realization that the nice guy I've worked to be, the dependable guy, the smart and resourceful guy all those thing I've done to try and build support and a team were for shit. I need to be selfish and make everything all about me and just focus on me. The countless things I've done for my boss, including helping him get where he is was all a huge waste of time. All the thing I've hated about management people I need to become. Shame on me.

Thicker skin I think includes no longer expecting or hoping that anyone I work with will be by my side. It's me alone.

[DonInNC]

I was in a similar situation a few years back. I tried to stick it out for a year because I didn't want to look like a jobhopper. I only made it to nine months. Looking back, I wish I hadn't stayed around that long.