worst winter carnival gift

[ZigZagBigBag]

my mom knows i like reading fantasy literature, so she thought she'd struck gold when she found a series of posters depicting some wizards and dragons fighting each other. when i opened the gift, i actually blushed at how embarassingly bad they were. i stammered out some weak statement of how i liked them...anyone else get any bad winter carnival gifts?

[mdr55]

What's a winter carnival gift?? Is that something like Christmas??

[Devo37]

a sweatshirt that's about 10 sizes too big. no way i'm gonna waste my time exchanging it. it's basically a new addition to the pile of ill-fitting or ugly clothing that wind up getting cut up into cleaning rags.

[Caseyelan]

Dave got me a gigantic rubber ducky and a book about dogs.
While these are not the worst gifts I got.
These were eyebrow raising.
But then I remembered who they were coming from and began to love them like children.

[underdog]

Dave got me a gigantic rubber ducky and a book about dogs.

A gigantic rubber ducky sounds like a pretty awesome gift.

[DarkHippie]

Dave got me a gigantic rubber ducky and a book about dogs.
While these are not the worst gifts I got.
These were eyebrow raising.
But then I remembered who they were coming from and began to love them like children.

I wish i had a gigantic rubber ducky :(

[Tall_James]

Those presents seem like something Dave would buy to enjoy with you and the new baby. And that is a cool thing.

[Caseyelan]

exactly.

[Chigworthy]

When I was a wee tyke, my folks would let me open one "lesser" gift of my choosing on Christmas Eve. One year, there was this small, extremely-thin, rigid rectangle that I could not figure out. I was so captivated by the damn thing in the days leading up to Christmas.

What could it be? It's like an oblong metal baseball card, with little embossments all over it. This is driving me nuts!

So I chose that one as my pre-gift. The wrapping paper came off in a second. Lo and behold:

It was a fucking cheap mini California license plate with my first name on it, to hang on my bike or whatever. I was so disappointed. What a little spoiled idiot. What the hell else could it have been?

[cigarsandscotch]

I think I gave the worst....to Ron of all people. After hearing about the Toots Shore ashtray gift story ( Fez's gift to Ron last year) I thought it would be HILAAAAAAARIOUS to give a gag gift....a "Pauly" Shore ashtray. Ugggggghh I know. Typing it, I realize just how retarded the idea was. I was some how blinded at the time.

I bought a cheap plastic ashtray, took a picture of it and photoshopped Pauly Shore holding it with a joint in his hand. I then made a photoshop "Certificate of Authenticity" too. (I'm so fucking embarassed right now). I then proceeded to place the two items in a box, gift wrap it and put a bow on it. DOOOOOOOOOOUUUUCCCCHHHHHEEE!!!!!!

Later that day at the Babyfuck Bash after getting good and snotted, I decided to present Ron with his side splitting gift. Time to let the hillarity ensue! He accepted it, awkwardly yet gracefully. All the while receiving a gift from a guy that he never met before and opened it. He looked at it, then at me and said in typical Ron deadpan fashion "Thanks a lot" and gave me that famous closed mouthed smile and single nod. (I bombed in front of Ron, Nooooooooooooooooooo). I then let him know that I had a real gift for him (which I did), several Gloria Cubana Series R cigars, to which he said "That's okay, I'm good". I was mortified. Ron couldn't have been any cooler about the situation and I couldn't have been any bigger of a dick. Not one of my better moments.

In my head the gag was going to be the funniest thing ever. Get it, Toots Shore, Pauly Shore..BWAHAHAHAhahahhaahahaaa ehhhhhhhh. To think, I haven't done heavy drugs since college. Not only that, the brainchild was born while sober. I have no excuses.

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y214/cigarsandscotch/comedy_store_2006.jpg
yes, this gem was the picture included with the ashtray.