AngelAmy
01-22-2008, 08:38 AM
Ok so I am not looking for any sympathy or anything I just wanted to share this with you guys because you are all my family :)
January 22 1998 I broke my leg.
I have written about this many times. I am sure people are sick of me writing about it. Believe me, I am too. That is why I have decided that this will be the last time I talk about it.
For all this time I have let this moment in my life really define what I have become. I have blamed it for a lot of things. I have blamed my depression on it. I have blamed the end of my soccer "career" on it. When I think about it I still tear up. I no longer want to dwell on it. What happened happened and I could not control that. I could have controlled what I did afterwards.
I wrote a blog about this on my myspace and didn't inclue the story but I think posting it here one last time will be the perfect end to this part of my life.
I was a freshman in high school on my way home. I used to walk home every day. I got along well with the crossing guard. I would even hang out there with her some days. FOr whatever reason I started to run really fast like I would be running into the traffic and then stop just as I got to the curb just to mess with her. On this particular day of January 22 1998 I didn't stop and to this day I do not know why. People who saw it thought I did it on purpose. Someone even told me I yelled out "wait for me." I don't know if it's true or not because I blanked out before I even got to the street.
I was running and first all of the sound went out and my whole body went numb and I kept running. Next my vision slowly started to fade until there was nothing. I woke up lying on my back underneath a car...the car I thought had hit me. I started to look around at so many people standing all around the sidewalk just looking at me. I was still in a daze as My best friend's dad, a cop I knew, and the guy who owned the car were standing above me. My friend's dad had me hold his hand as I began to say over and over again, "I'm sorry."
I couldn't feel pain in my leg really but I know I couldn't feel it and I could tell it was getting swollen. I reached down to hold it and I think I even squeaked out a "my leg, my leg." As I waited for the ambulance to come I noticed that blood was trickling down...my head was bleeding. A friend of mine who was a cop said I held up traffic for 45 minutes.
The EMTs came and put me up on a stretcher and into a neck brace. The guy in the ambulance told me he would have to cut my clothes off. I pleaded with him not to. I even asked if he could just pull the jersey over my head. I was wearing my reversible Dan Marino jersey, my most favorite thing to wear. (I actually still have it) He said he would hold off even though the hospital would be mad but eventually they will have to cut it off and they did.
When I got to the hospital a whole team of people started doing whatever they do. I really don't know all of what went on. I know I got those heart monitor things put on me, the catheter put in, and then I had to drink like 2 cups of dye for the CAT scan, I don't know exactly how much it was but I remember it was a lot and it tasted gross but they tried to tell me it was Kool Aid.
I sat waiting in the ER for hours and hours in lots of pain after the CAT scan and xrays were taken. During the CAT scan I used the heart monitor to try to regulate my heart rate. Every time the beeps got faster I tried to calm down. Listening to your heart rate is such a nerve racking thing.
For those of you who don't know getting a bone set is probably one of the most painful things you can ever go through. I haven't had too much other painful things in life happen to me but I can't imagine too many things being worse than that. They tried to get me to hold still. I was getting so mad at them. I understand they have a job to do but you can't expect someone to sit still while grabbing their broken leg. I still cringe every time I think about it.
I had a Tib/Fib break. One of the bones had about an inch broken out of it and the other was just a clean break. I wish I had a picture of the x-rays to show you because it really was a crazy thing. I soon found out that the next day I would have to have surgery to get a pin and screws put in to hold the bones in place. I was scared to death.
The next day was the surgery and they had woken me up early to bring me in. My mom wasn't there yet and I started freaking out. I didn't want to go in without her being there. They let me call her to tell her to come but they wouldn't hold off if she wasn't there. Luckily she got there just in time. When I got on the table I tried to look around and see what's going on and before I went under I said, "don't mess up." Ha aren't I funny? I think I was high from the morphine.
So I was in the hospital for a week and I don't remember a lot of it. My mom and friends told me I slept a lot. My first day of physical therapy I couldn't even stand up without being dizzy so that didn't go well but after that I got the hang of it. My soccer coach at the time even came with me once to physical therapy and I thought that was really nice of him. They taught me simple things like how to walk up stairs with crutches, how to get out of bed and things like that.
I know for the first couple days I had a pretty high fever of 103.5. I think they said it was because my body was still in shock. I had a concusion and to this day I still have a bump on the back of my head from when my head hit the street. While in the hospital I also found out that I flew backwards about 14 feet and the car I woke up under was not the car that hit me but the car I landed under.
So the rest of the story is pretty boring. I was in the hospital for one week and at home from school for another week. I was on crutches until May and even off the crutches I had to wear a protective brace for months after that too. I have a bunch of nerve damage from it which makes part of my leg numb and the rest of the parts very sensative to touch.
Four years ago I got the pin and the screws taken out and I really did feel like a weight was liften off my shoulders. Like a chapter of my life was finally over. Now I am closing the book. I have had ten years to dwell and now I am content with finally leaving the past behind (thanks stugots for reminding me of that).
http://pic20.picturetrail.com/VOL242/894679/6961085/90105599.jpg
January 22 1998 I broke my leg.
I have written about this many times. I am sure people are sick of me writing about it. Believe me, I am too. That is why I have decided that this will be the last time I talk about it.
For all this time I have let this moment in my life really define what I have become. I have blamed it for a lot of things. I have blamed my depression on it. I have blamed the end of my soccer "career" on it. When I think about it I still tear up. I no longer want to dwell on it. What happened happened and I could not control that. I could have controlled what I did afterwards.
I wrote a blog about this on my myspace and didn't inclue the story but I think posting it here one last time will be the perfect end to this part of my life.
I was a freshman in high school on my way home. I used to walk home every day. I got along well with the crossing guard. I would even hang out there with her some days. FOr whatever reason I started to run really fast like I would be running into the traffic and then stop just as I got to the curb just to mess with her. On this particular day of January 22 1998 I didn't stop and to this day I do not know why. People who saw it thought I did it on purpose. Someone even told me I yelled out "wait for me." I don't know if it's true or not because I blanked out before I even got to the street.
I was running and first all of the sound went out and my whole body went numb and I kept running. Next my vision slowly started to fade until there was nothing. I woke up lying on my back underneath a car...the car I thought had hit me. I started to look around at so many people standing all around the sidewalk just looking at me. I was still in a daze as My best friend's dad, a cop I knew, and the guy who owned the car were standing above me. My friend's dad had me hold his hand as I began to say over and over again, "I'm sorry."
I couldn't feel pain in my leg really but I know I couldn't feel it and I could tell it was getting swollen. I reached down to hold it and I think I even squeaked out a "my leg, my leg." As I waited for the ambulance to come I noticed that blood was trickling down...my head was bleeding. A friend of mine who was a cop said I held up traffic for 45 minutes.
The EMTs came and put me up on a stretcher and into a neck brace. The guy in the ambulance told me he would have to cut my clothes off. I pleaded with him not to. I even asked if he could just pull the jersey over my head. I was wearing my reversible Dan Marino jersey, my most favorite thing to wear. (I actually still have it) He said he would hold off even though the hospital would be mad but eventually they will have to cut it off and they did.
When I got to the hospital a whole team of people started doing whatever they do. I really don't know all of what went on. I know I got those heart monitor things put on me, the catheter put in, and then I had to drink like 2 cups of dye for the CAT scan, I don't know exactly how much it was but I remember it was a lot and it tasted gross but they tried to tell me it was Kool Aid.
I sat waiting in the ER for hours and hours in lots of pain after the CAT scan and xrays were taken. During the CAT scan I used the heart monitor to try to regulate my heart rate. Every time the beeps got faster I tried to calm down. Listening to your heart rate is such a nerve racking thing.
For those of you who don't know getting a bone set is probably one of the most painful things you can ever go through. I haven't had too much other painful things in life happen to me but I can't imagine too many things being worse than that. They tried to get me to hold still. I was getting so mad at them. I understand they have a job to do but you can't expect someone to sit still while grabbing their broken leg. I still cringe every time I think about it.
I had a Tib/Fib break. One of the bones had about an inch broken out of it and the other was just a clean break. I wish I had a picture of the x-rays to show you because it really was a crazy thing. I soon found out that the next day I would have to have surgery to get a pin and screws put in to hold the bones in place. I was scared to death.
The next day was the surgery and they had woken me up early to bring me in. My mom wasn't there yet and I started freaking out. I didn't want to go in without her being there. They let me call her to tell her to come but they wouldn't hold off if she wasn't there. Luckily she got there just in time. When I got on the table I tried to look around and see what's going on and before I went under I said, "don't mess up." Ha aren't I funny? I think I was high from the morphine.
So I was in the hospital for a week and I don't remember a lot of it. My mom and friends told me I slept a lot. My first day of physical therapy I couldn't even stand up without being dizzy so that didn't go well but after that I got the hang of it. My soccer coach at the time even came with me once to physical therapy and I thought that was really nice of him. They taught me simple things like how to walk up stairs with crutches, how to get out of bed and things like that.
I know for the first couple days I had a pretty high fever of 103.5. I think they said it was because my body was still in shock. I had a concusion and to this day I still have a bump on the back of my head from when my head hit the street. While in the hospital I also found out that I flew backwards about 14 feet and the car I woke up under was not the car that hit me but the car I landed under.
So the rest of the story is pretty boring. I was in the hospital for one week and at home from school for another week. I was on crutches until May and even off the crutches I had to wear a protective brace for months after that too. I have a bunch of nerve damage from it which makes part of my leg numb and the rest of the parts very sensative to touch.
Four years ago I got the pin and the screws taken out and I really did feel like a weight was liften off my shoulders. Like a chapter of my life was finally over. Now I am closing the book. I have had ten years to dwell and now I am content with finally leaving the past behind (thanks stugots for reminding me of that).
http://pic20.picturetrail.com/VOL242/894679/6961085/90105599.jpg