The Passion of the Gvac

[Friday]

In the morning the whole assembly brings Gvac to the RonFez.net governor Pontius Mikeyboy, under charges of subverting the nation and making himself a king.

Mikeyboy then refers the case to the ruler of the Confessional', King Hottub.
Hottub questions Gvac but receives no answer; Hottub sends Gvac back to Mikeyboy.

Mikeyboy has Gvac flogged by Tenbatsuzen, then brings him out to the crowd to release him.

http://www.felthamassociates.btinternet.co.uk/gfcic/DSCF8834.jpg

Once more Mikeyboy came out and said to the Board Members, "Look, I am bringing him out to you to let you know that I find no basis for a charge against him."
When Gvac came out wearing the crown of thorns and the purple robe, Mikeyboy said to them, "Here is the man!"
As soon as the chief mods and the board members saw him, they shouted, "Crucify! Crucify!"
But Mikeyboy answered, "You take him and crucify him. As for me, I find no basis for a charge against him."

Gvac answered, "You would have no power over me if it were not given to you from above. Therefore the one who handed me over to you is guilty of a greater sin."

From then on, Mikeyboy tried to set Gvac free, but the Board Members kept shouting, "If you let this man go, you are no friend of Opie. Anyone who claims to be a king opposes Opie."

When Mikey heard this, he brought Gvac out.
"Here is your king," Mikeyboy said to the posters.

But they shouted, "Take him away! Take him away! Crucify him!"
"Shall I crucify your king?" Mikeyboy asked.
"We have no king but Opie," the chief mods answered.

Finally Mikeyboy handed him over to them to be crucified.


And so our Good Friday begins....

[DiabloSammich]

It's amazing how much hotter this story has gotten.

[EliSnow]

I'm wondering who the criminal was that the mods chose to set free rather than setting Gvac free.

[mikeyboy]

I'm wondering who the criminal was that the mods chose to set free rather than setting Gvac free.

bunnyluvsthem

[AF Mike]

My alter boy days are a little hazy -
do the jews gamble for Gvacs clothes today,
or are they waiting for tomorrow?

[TheMojoPin]

What an oxymoron.

Though the pic if Ned Beatty in roleplaying gear whipping a hippie in a towel is anice, albeit kinky, touch. It nicely offsets Gvac's cold, robotic anti-passion.

[Furtherman]

I'm selling stakes at half-price. Buy three now and get a free mallet! It's time to pound some sinners!

[Freitag]

Well...

ECW! ECW! ECW! ECW!

[Freitag]

Also, as a question, who will be the other two criminals crucificed on Golgotha with GVac?

[Hottub]

Erin Moran and Fred.

[A.J.]

I'm wondering who the criminal was that the mods chose to set free rather than setting Gvac free.

"Give us Waddles!"

http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en-commons/thumb/b/ba/360px-GiveUsBarabbas.png

[Thebazile78]

My alter boy days are a little hazy -
do the jews gamble for Gvacs clothes today,
or are they waiting for tomorrow?

The Romans were casting lots at the foot of the Cross, not the Jews.

The Jews were mostly at home, preparing for Shabbat.

Except for the Apostles; they wanted to be sure they would be able to get the Body to the Tomb before Sundown.

Also, as a question, who will be the other two criminals crucificed on Golgotha with GVac?

I think that if Mikey had had things his way, you'd be mentioned there, instead of being the head of the Bodyguards with the flogging.

[Team_Ramrod]

My only King is a Hippo... This story has flaws.

[Friday]

So the forum Mods took charge of Gvac. Carrying his own cross, he went out to the place of the Bannings. Here they crucified him, and with him two others—one on each side and Gvac in the middle.

Mikeyboy had a notice prepared and fastened to the cross. It read: GVAC OF RONFEZ.NET, THE KING OF THE INTERNETS.

When the mods crucified Gvac, they took his clothes, dividing them into four shares, one for each of them, with the undergarment remaining.
This garment was seamless, woven in one piece from top to bottom.

http://img156.imageshack.us/img156/8877/gvaccrosswn8.jpg


Later, knowing that everything had now been finished, and so that Scripture would be fulfilled, Gvac said, "I am thirsty."
A jar of coffee was there, so they soaked a sponge in it, and lifted it to Gvac's lips.

When he had received the drink, Gvac said, "It is finished."

With that, he bowed his head, gave up his spirit and accepted his banning.

[EliSnow]

And, behold, the pictures in the Hot Chic Pic thread were rent in twain from the top to the bottom; and the earth did quake, and the rocks rent.

[SyndicateParish]

Yay a parade!!

[TheMojoPin]

It should have been that the mods took his HAT and divided it up four ways.

[Friday]

It should have been that the mods took his HAT and divided it up four ways.

always a fuckin critic.

[ChrisTheCop]

I threw up in my mouth a little when you said "we have no king but Opie"

Then I realized, Caesar was a false god, too.

Phew. Good writing.

Spew averted.

[douchebagsean]

this entire thread has me giggling like a wee child:lol:

[Freitag]

The best part about this thread?

After Sunday, we'll only have to deal with Gvac for about 40 more days before he goes away for 2000 years.

[Furtherman]

[QUOTE=Freitag;1665171After Sunday, we'll only have to deal with Gvac for about 40 more days before he goes away for 2000 years.[/QUOTE]

So that means we'll have an Ascension of Gvac!? Hmmmm... thread idea....

[Friday]

So that means we'll have an Ascension of Gvac!? Hmmmm... thread idea....

the planning committee is already on it. not to worry.


reminder: after the entombment of Gvac's body, there will be punch and pie served in the Lounge.

[reillyluck]

the planning committee is already on it. not to worry.


reminder: after the entombment of Gvac's body, there will be punch and pie served in the Lounge.

i love pie.

[Tenbatsuzen]

i love pie.

Yes, but you gave up sex and soup for lent?

[Thebazile78]

Yes, but you gave up sex and soup for lent?

Lent is over once he's in the Tomb, dude.

Reilly wins.

[Hottub]

the planning committee is already on it. not to worry.


reminder: after the entombment of Gvac's body, there will be punch and pie served in the Lounge.

I prefer Marlboros and coffee, but punch and pie will do.

[EliSnow]

I prefer Marlboros and coffee, but punch and pie will do.

Depends. Will the punch have some alcohol in it?

[Friday]

Depends. Will the punch have some alcohol in it?

have ya met me?

of course there will be alcohol in it, silly.

[EliSnow]

have ya met me?



Technically? No I never have. To my loss, of course.

I think I've only ever met Funkman, Furtherman, ESD, Stugots, Sheepy and mikeyboy.

Edit: I forgot I met Gvac too.

[Hottub]

Technically? No I never have. To my loss, of course.

I think I've only ever met Funkman, Furtherman, ESD, Stugots, Sheepy and mikeyboy.

You've never hung with The Tub?

See you in Bergen!

[EliSnow]

You've never hung with The Tub?

See you in Bergen!

I don't think I have.

And since I live in CT and my wife is going to have our second kid any day now, I don't think I'll be seeing you in Bergen.

Someday, I'll make a ronfez.net party.

[ralphbxny]

I herd about the Passion of GVAC....there was a tape in the 80s that shows he used to be quite limber!

[Gvac]

I have returned.

Do I look different to you?

I am he who you say I am.


http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c34/Gvac/CloseUp.jpg

[Jughead]

I have returned.

Do I look different to you?

I am he who you say I am.


http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c34/Gvac/CloseUp.jpg

....to covet is to know.... :innocent:..Just don't hurt his playing fingers....:king:

[Friday]

does this mean i have to start the Easter Sunday thread now?

ugh.

Gvac is AWFUL at taking direction.....

[midwestjeff]

I have returned.

Do I look different to you?

I am he who you say I am.



http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:TsqaCWDn1S5gCM:http://www.best-horror-movies.com/image-files/children-of-the-corn-child-cult.jpg

[WampusCrandle]

I have returned.

Do I look different to you?

I am he who you say I am.


http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c34/Gvac/CloseUp.jpg

nope, same as the picture on my night stand . . . sexy and a bit, dare i say, rape-able

[Reephdweller]

I have returned.

Do I look different to you?

I am he who you say I am.


http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c34/Gvac/CloseUp.jpg


Somehow you got handsomer, you devil you!

[EliSnow]

Gvac is AWFUL at taking direction.....

There's a surprise.

[DiabloSammich]

I have returned.

Do I look different to you?

I am he who you say I am.


http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c34/Gvac/CloseUp.jpg



Death and resurrection has been kind to you, sir.

[A.J.]

I have returned.

Do I look different to you?

I am he who you say I am.


http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c34/Gvac/CloseUp.jpg

You look a little different.

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2005/01/images/050127_pin_shroud.jpg

[SatCam]

I have returned.

Do I look different to you?

I am he who you say I am.


http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c34/Gvac/CloseUp.jpg

You look like you gave up

[Recyclerz]

I realize I'm a little late to the party but I have to type this:

GVAC died for somebody's sins but not mine.


Hey, it's not a line you can use that often. :innocent:

[Friday]

still fits!

[WampusCrandle]

GVAC died for somebody's sins but not mine.

well, i have too many sins - does that mean Gvac needs to die a few more times?

[conman823]

This is the most religious thing I've been part of all year.

Glory be to GVAC.

[cougarjake13]

so what happens on sunday ???


is he gonna move a thread and ascend to modship or something

[Thebazile78]

so what happens on sunday ???


is he gonna move a thread and ascend to modship or something

The Ascension is 40 days from Sunday.

This is only about his death and Resurrection.