Worried...

[El Mudo]

Ive been seeing this girl pretty seriously for about a month now...things have been going pretty well.

Last night before bed she tells me that she feels like things are going too fast and that she feels like we never really got a chance to "date" and that maybe we were both "too eager" to get into something together cause of our previous histories. Me being a panicky pete, naturally can't sleep on this, so I end up waking her about 2 hours later and talking about it some more...I dunno I guess I just kinda needed assurance that she didn't want to end it, not to sound like a complete puss on that matter. She tells me she still wants to be with me, but I just can't stop worrying about it cause I can't help but feel on some level that she may just be trying not to hurt me.

Do I have cause for concern?

[LaBoob]

Honestly, I think you could sit and worry and speculate for days on this, but it's not going to do you any good... you should ask her... if she says she doesn't want to break up with you then ya gotta believe her and let it go.

She has a legitimate concern... relationships that begin really quickly and passionately have a tendency to fizzle out pretty quickly too. Maybe she is worried about that happening and wants to make sure your relationship lasts.

[CofyCrakCocaine]

The only thing I know about this is that nobody knows anything about what's going on behind the scenes brutha. Her included.

That means that you can guess as to what's going on and be completely off the mark or 100% correct. Useful advice, I know... my point I guess is that you can't over-speculate about the unknown especially if it's something you're fearful of, because sometimes worrying turns things that aren't there into real problems. I've tried to pre-empt alot of shit in alot of shitty relationships and it never really did any good. The best preemptive move u can do is just be yourself and treat her right.

Just live your life and be normal with her. Face the problems when you know they're real. As the saying goes... cross the bridge when you get to it.

[celery]

If you want to stick with her, you really shouldn't make it apparent that you're worried about her dumping you. Most women like confidence and security (even if you have to fake it).

[sr71blackbird]

I know I would worry too, because I would wonder what prompted her to make that declaration and it would gnaw at me as it seems to gnaw at you. But I am slowly learning that I have no control of what people think and do (I cant even control what I think!). So I know that this sounds too easy, but hang in there for the ride and see what happens, but try the enjoy whatever your she brings you.

[Sinestro]

Dump her before she dumps you.




After all, all great couples fight and split up.













Unless you're not a great couple......then it's splitsvilles for real.



Good luck.

[WhistlePig]

I know I would worry too, because I would wonder what prompted her to make that declaration and it would gnaw at me as it seems to gnaw at you. But I am slowly learning that I have no control of what people think and do (I cant even control what I think!). So I know that this sounds too easy, but hang in there for the ride and see what happens, but try the enjoy whatever your she brings you.

I agree with this. You can't control people's feelings and emotions. I wish I realized this when I was younger. You seem to be a very sweet person (and a Caps fan to boot! How can she resist?) but there is nothing you can do if this chick has set her sights elsewhere. The best you can do is not seem desperate and let what will be be. Maybe it will sway her your way (if she is wavering) but if it doesn't, there's nothing you can do. She just simply isn't right for you. The right one will want to stay and will stay. Wait for her.

[Sinestro]

The right one will want to stay and will stay. Wait for her.


But how bout if it's a LONG LONG wait? Who wants to wait forever if it even happens?