Kathleen From The Bronx
08-07-2008, 12:33 AM
Dear Ron and Whatley Shooow,
Who the hell reads Apartment 3-G?? Who read it way back when, who reads it now....and why, why, why?!
That is a question that I have had for quite some time...and then I forgot about it cause I pretty much stopped reading the funnies... but it once again reared its head after Tuesday's show when you guys were talking about unfunny comic strips.
Now I am fairly certain that Apartment 3-G was not meant to be rife with jokes, God help em if it was supposed to be.... but anyway, WHO??? Wait, lemme also scream, "Rex Morgan M.D.??!!" and once again, "WHO?!"
For all the shit talking that people do about T.V.'s soap operas and how nothing reeally happens for months on end, I will defy anyone to stick with those strips that I have just been yelling about.....
Do you realize that back when I still frequented that area of the paper, I would make it a some ridiculous challenge for myself to read them everyday, along with the others, just as an exercise....an experiment.... in order to see if I could even vaguely detect an inkling of a point or a plot...or if anything...oh man if precious ANYTHING would transpire....
I don't need to draw this shit out (oooh puns!) for you... It didn't. Nothing....
In the midst of my trials I would think to myself, "OK well this one broad's thrown herself on a bed and is sobbing and squirting out big, bulbous tears....again...." Please.
If these were to be cartoon soaps of sorts, then how long were the avid reader supposed to wait.... I would wonder who liked them.... and I would envision a woman, perhaps a homemaker taking off her apron and wiping her brow clean of flour from the day's baking... after her hard work....sitting down with her Sanka to read those kinda strips.... How long would this lady have to wait for some kinda pay-off to the story?
I imagined that scenario taking place for years upon years, as time marched on and her children grew up.... Her hair turned to gray..... Oh my God is anything gonna happen to reward this poor woman's dedication??!
I wondered if someone had lived an entire lifetime and had met their end without seeing any action in that section of the funny papers.. I mean this poor soul is on her deathbed and still nothing has been resolved in that infernal Apartment 3-G!
Jeez Louise.... Not that I even have yet to even breathe a word about the strip, Mary Worth.....but I remember hearing somewhere that it was mad long-running..... I'm talkin since the 30's...... and I also remember once seeing a clip where the characters were discussing whether or not to eat at a seafood restaurant..... That is what happened that day.... I mean.... do you see what I'm saying???
A calendar year might pass before they decide, "OK no then, steaks instead." A calendar year....or a generation..... or who the hell could possibly know..... to stick with...? OK. I'm starting to feel a little bad as if I am shittin all over someone's cartooning life work....so I'll shut up about this soon..
Oh but, oddly enough I feel that I should mention that really appreciate pop art's Roy Lichtenstein's work which depicted in grand scale such scenes so similar to those in Apartment 3-G and the like... maybe cause they seemed to suggest this tongue-in-cheek commentary like, "Will you check out this pointless and melodramatic shit!" or something.... I'm witcha, Roy...
My mother called the newspaper comics, "the funnies," and I guess that's some kinda leftover old-timey habit from when she was a child... like callin the refrigerator, "the ice box." Ya know calling the comics in the paper, "the funnies," really made me wonder too, cause precious few of em brought me to laughin out loud.... except of course for The Far Side. Oh I loved The Far Side.... I love The Far Side and have all the books of collections and they are so soo funny, and sooo soo brilliant.....and man...I am not so sure that I even kept reading newspaper comic strips after Gary Larson retired in 1995...
"The Funnies," became, "The Depressings," to me without The Far Side. Sure I tried to give it a shot and make Zippy the Pinhead my own or whatever... Zippy is good peoples, or good pinheads....I respected it for its randomness, but really..... and I was glad to know of The Lockhorns just cause it was a good reference to have, to call couples that if they fought a lot...... and good for you Calvin you and your vivid imagination or whatever, but ahhhh but it just wasn't the same in that part of papertown... after 1995.
1995 the last new Far Side was in the paper...1995 I graduated high school....1995 Jerry Garcia died..... Hmmm... I also got the last of the real bad haircuts that year too... Those musings there really don't have anything to do with anything but I guess that I will leave them there as if they are clues. Clues.....
Maybe I am being too negative.... I say.... Dear me.... Here I am goin on and on about all the comic strips that have left me just straight befuddled, and all I have said about the one that I loved the best is that I miss it..... Hmmm....
There very well could be some highly amusing comic strips in the papers... Maybe I just don't really have any on the tip of my brain cause I read the news on the internetz now.......
There has to be something funny out there....and yet.... the negativity still flows over me and I feel like howling into the night sky that Prince Valient is a bloody outrage.... A BLOODY OUUUTRAAAAAGE! And I feel like adding in screamy tones, "Give it up Mark Trail!" So you put an ankle brace on a woodchuck...nobody gives a hoot.... OOoh man...
Well I think that a good idea for a funny, funny hilarious comic strip could be based on romantic wooing... that's not really flattering after all, in reality.... and with each woo the recipient could shriek retorts like, "That's not wooing!" and, "Just because it's a romantic voice doesn't mean the things you're sayin are!!!"
Yeah see, of course I'm thinking of how on Monday's show Fezzie got a wooing.... That was one of the funniest things I've ever heard.... Ron doing the voice of Tennessee Ed who has eyes for our own Fezzielou....
I was really fuckin cryin during many parts... Let's rehash! I loved it how "Ed," told FW that he wanted to wisk him off to a little place called, "The Top of the Bridge Restaurant..." Ooh and then when Ed said in the romantic-like voice, "Fezzie, you smell like fear itself..." Ahhhhhahahahah.....
I loved Ronnie, in Ed's country style voice.... That was funny just itself... like, I thought that he kinda sounded like that character Bill from King of the Hill.. but anyway.... I really appreciated that voice of his sayin, "Baaaaack and forth foreverrrrrr...." like from that film, Me, You, and Everyone We Know....and it was killin me when he added, "Yer as beautiful as Lynyrd Skynyrd! Yer Lynyrd Skynyrd purty!"
That shit was a huge cackle...... as was when he told Whatley, "You're every bit as purty as Dolly Parton, and twice as fat......and twice as faaaat..." That was wonderful, wonderful..as was the talk about warshing machines and selling warsh boards outside Dollywood....Wonderful.......
Oh ok, and this is the thing that almost made me choke...really.....cause I was laughing so hard that I did the thing where I started coughing like some wheezin, hackin old woman....and so.. yeah, very healthy over here and that almost killed me.... and so now I tell you that Ed said...
It was during that twisted pillow talk between Ed and Fezzie, when in a whispery voice he was sayin, "Fezzzie...Fezzie... Tomorrah....would you fart in mah mouth.....and then I'll fart in yer mouth...." and then...I dare say... jubilantly he added....
"AND THEN we'll be murrried!" and Fezzie screamed somethin bout that's not how you get married.... and Ed said in that voice, "Thaaat's a Tennessee Wedding!" I could almost picture the pie-eatin grin on Ed's face!
"That's a Tennessee Wedding...." I laughed so fuckin hard........ ya have no idea :0)
I wish there was a comic strip in the paper called, "A Tennessee Wedding," where the wooing and exploits of that crazy pair could be expressed every day. That's what I'm talking about...... Do it.
OK well, I have screamed in your eyeballs more that ya could have possibly endured...... So I'll stop ramblin for now.....
Peace out homies,
kathleen :):):)
Who the hell reads Apartment 3-G?? Who read it way back when, who reads it now....and why, why, why?!
That is a question that I have had for quite some time...and then I forgot about it cause I pretty much stopped reading the funnies... but it once again reared its head after Tuesday's show when you guys were talking about unfunny comic strips.
Now I am fairly certain that Apartment 3-G was not meant to be rife with jokes, God help em if it was supposed to be.... but anyway, WHO??? Wait, lemme also scream, "Rex Morgan M.D.??!!" and once again, "WHO?!"
For all the shit talking that people do about T.V.'s soap operas and how nothing reeally happens for months on end, I will defy anyone to stick with those strips that I have just been yelling about.....
Do you realize that back when I still frequented that area of the paper, I would make it a some ridiculous challenge for myself to read them everyday, along with the others, just as an exercise....an experiment.... in order to see if I could even vaguely detect an inkling of a point or a plot...or if anything...oh man if precious ANYTHING would transpire....
I don't need to draw this shit out (oooh puns!) for you... It didn't. Nothing....
In the midst of my trials I would think to myself, "OK well this one broad's thrown herself on a bed and is sobbing and squirting out big, bulbous tears....again...." Please.
If these were to be cartoon soaps of sorts, then how long were the avid reader supposed to wait.... I would wonder who liked them.... and I would envision a woman, perhaps a homemaker taking off her apron and wiping her brow clean of flour from the day's baking... after her hard work....sitting down with her Sanka to read those kinda strips.... How long would this lady have to wait for some kinda pay-off to the story?
I imagined that scenario taking place for years upon years, as time marched on and her children grew up.... Her hair turned to gray..... Oh my God is anything gonna happen to reward this poor woman's dedication??!
I wondered if someone had lived an entire lifetime and had met their end without seeing any action in that section of the funny papers.. I mean this poor soul is on her deathbed and still nothing has been resolved in that infernal Apartment 3-G!
Jeez Louise.... Not that I even have yet to even breathe a word about the strip, Mary Worth.....but I remember hearing somewhere that it was mad long-running..... I'm talkin since the 30's...... and I also remember once seeing a clip where the characters were discussing whether or not to eat at a seafood restaurant..... That is what happened that day.... I mean.... do you see what I'm saying???
A calendar year might pass before they decide, "OK no then, steaks instead." A calendar year....or a generation..... or who the hell could possibly know..... to stick with...? OK. I'm starting to feel a little bad as if I am shittin all over someone's cartooning life work....so I'll shut up about this soon..
Oh but, oddly enough I feel that I should mention that really appreciate pop art's Roy Lichtenstein's work which depicted in grand scale such scenes so similar to those in Apartment 3-G and the like... maybe cause they seemed to suggest this tongue-in-cheek commentary like, "Will you check out this pointless and melodramatic shit!" or something.... I'm witcha, Roy...
My mother called the newspaper comics, "the funnies," and I guess that's some kinda leftover old-timey habit from when she was a child... like callin the refrigerator, "the ice box." Ya know calling the comics in the paper, "the funnies," really made me wonder too, cause precious few of em brought me to laughin out loud.... except of course for The Far Side. Oh I loved The Far Side.... I love The Far Side and have all the books of collections and they are so soo funny, and sooo soo brilliant.....and man...I am not so sure that I even kept reading newspaper comic strips after Gary Larson retired in 1995...
"The Funnies," became, "The Depressings," to me without The Far Side. Sure I tried to give it a shot and make Zippy the Pinhead my own or whatever... Zippy is good peoples, or good pinheads....I respected it for its randomness, but really..... and I was glad to know of The Lockhorns just cause it was a good reference to have, to call couples that if they fought a lot...... and good for you Calvin you and your vivid imagination or whatever, but ahhhh but it just wasn't the same in that part of papertown... after 1995.
1995 the last new Far Side was in the paper...1995 I graduated high school....1995 Jerry Garcia died..... Hmmm... I also got the last of the real bad haircuts that year too... Those musings there really don't have anything to do with anything but I guess that I will leave them there as if they are clues. Clues.....
Maybe I am being too negative.... I say.... Dear me.... Here I am goin on and on about all the comic strips that have left me just straight befuddled, and all I have said about the one that I loved the best is that I miss it..... Hmmm....
There very well could be some highly amusing comic strips in the papers... Maybe I just don't really have any on the tip of my brain cause I read the news on the internetz now.......
There has to be something funny out there....and yet.... the negativity still flows over me and I feel like howling into the night sky that Prince Valient is a bloody outrage.... A BLOODY OUUUTRAAAAAGE! And I feel like adding in screamy tones, "Give it up Mark Trail!" So you put an ankle brace on a woodchuck...nobody gives a hoot.... OOoh man...
Well I think that a good idea for a funny, funny hilarious comic strip could be based on romantic wooing... that's not really flattering after all, in reality.... and with each woo the recipient could shriek retorts like, "That's not wooing!" and, "Just because it's a romantic voice doesn't mean the things you're sayin are!!!"
Yeah see, of course I'm thinking of how on Monday's show Fezzie got a wooing.... That was one of the funniest things I've ever heard.... Ron doing the voice of Tennessee Ed who has eyes for our own Fezzielou....
I was really fuckin cryin during many parts... Let's rehash! I loved it how "Ed," told FW that he wanted to wisk him off to a little place called, "The Top of the Bridge Restaurant..." Ooh and then when Ed said in the romantic-like voice, "Fezzie, you smell like fear itself..." Ahhhhhahahahah.....
I loved Ronnie, in Ed's country style voice.... That was funny just itself... like, I thought that he kinda sounded like that character Bill from King of the Hill.. but anyway.... I really appreciated that voice of his sayin, "Baaaaack and forth foreverrrrrr...." like from that film, Me, You, and Everyone We Know....and it was killin me when he added, "Yer as beautiful as Lynyrd Skynyrd! Yer Lynyrd Skynyrd purty!"
That shit was a huge cackle...... as was when he told Whatley, "You're every bit as purty as Dolly Parton, and twice as fat......and twice as faaaat..." That was wonderful, wonderful..as was the talk about warshing machines and selling warsh boards outside Dollywood....Wonderful.......
Oh ok, and this is the thing that almost made me choke...really.....cause I was laughing so hard that I did the thing where I started coughing like some wheezin, hackin old woman....and so.. yeah, very healthy over here and that almost killed me.... and so now I tell you that Ed said...
It was during that twisted pillow talk between Ed and Fezzie, when in a whispery voice he was sayin, "Fezzzie...Fezzie... Tomorrah....would you fart in mah mouth.....and then I'll fart in yer mouth...." and then...I dare say... jubilantly he added....
"AND THEN we'll be murrried!" and Fezzie screamed somethin bout that's not how you get married.... and Ed said in that voice, "Thaaat's a Tennessee Wedding!" I could almost picture the pie-eatin grin on Ed's face!
"That's a Tennessee Wedding...." I laughed so fuckin hard........ ya have no idea :0)
I wish there was a comic strip in the paper called, "A Tennessee Wedding," where the wooing and exploits of that crazy pair could be expressed every day. That's what I'm talking about...... Do it.
OK well, I have screamed in your eyeballs more that ya could have possibly endured...... So I'll stop ramblin for now.....
Peace out homies,
kathleen :):):)