Feelin' blue

[Aggie]

Well, I went back and forth about posting specifics but decided to be general. I just don’t feel comfortable coming outright saying what happened but it’s been messing with my head the last few days.

Something sad happened to me this summer and I’ve been having a bad week. Yesterday was particularly bad and today feels about the same. My moods are going up and down like crazy, I feel restless and I can’t concentrate on anything. I cried like 3 times yesterday before noon. That’s so not me but I am not in control of myself at the moment. It’s just still very fresh.

There’s no particular point to this thread except to vent and hopefully make me feel a little better. In times like these I feel alone even though I’m not. I have a wonderful husband, friends and family but on days like this I feel like I’m on an island. I know it will get better but while I’m in this it feels like it will never go away. In fact, I will never forget what happened but I believe how I deal with it will improve.

Sorry to be Debbie Downer.

[Jujubees2]

http://i99.photobucket.com/albums/l317/bonnieusascot/Hello/cheer-up.gif

[A.J.]

If you were in DC, I'd take you to Ben's Chili Bowl to cheer you up.

Feel better sweetie.

[Knowledged_one]

http://www.ferris.edu/htmls/studentlife/dining/wecarenew1.gif

[CofyCrakCocaine]

We carry every wrong in our heart like they were medals... just human nature, nothing to be ashamed of. You already know this but their weight'll get lighter.

Much love to ya Aggie from a guy who doesn't know ya but can empathize in his own way that this summer '08 was for the birds.

[Aggie]

Thanks all, you're so sweet. You made me smile which is great.

Juju, how did you know daisies are my favorite!!

AJ, I'd LOVE a good meal with a friend. Thanks.

KO, We already talked, thanks again.

Triple C, I totally empathize. This summer blew. Thanks for the kind words.

[RoseBlood]

Aggie,

My heart truly aches whenever I see someone going through stuff like this. Without even knowing any specifics it's obvious this is something that is weighing heavily on you and for that I truly empathize. I know you're not looking for sympathy, rather wanting to vent, I understand that all to well. Some things are just to difficult to say and only time can make it somewhat easier. Whatever it is, every situation and individual is unique and therefore NO ONE can really know what you're feeling inside, so I hope you're not being to hard on yourself. I'm glad you were able to come vent to some of your "buddays" and I hope you do whatever you have to help ease the pain. Sometimes you think you're ok and then sometimes a stressful day/week can make you feel like you're loosing it. Sometimes it could just be something you saw or something someone said that brings everything back in a rush. I dont know what else to say but maybe slowly you can learn to share whatever it is that's been troubling you with family/friends etc. It does help (even if temporarily) to not feel so alone cause that might be one of the worst feelings in the word and no matter how many people you have in your life you still feel alone. Sometimes it's not about disclosing details, but finding an open ear and mind. I'm hoping the mood swings and crying (even if it's out of character) is part of your "healing"? Whatever happens, have comfort in the fact you can always come here but I hope that in time you find peace with your situation.

[TheGameHHH]

there's not much i can say to you other then i know you're a strong person and you will be able to overcome this feeling through your own personal journey. it may be on your own, talking to someone personally or professionally, or through medication. however you acheive it im confident you will get through. keep your head up ma.

dont forget that im here for you if you ever need me. PM me if you need to talk.

[FUNKMAN]

feel better Aggie! take it from Funkman, Funktown ain't no fun...

i don't know what I'm sayin

:smile:

[commish13]

Well I never want a Jersey Girl to be sad (okay that's completely untrue), but I sympathize with you. I've had a horrific 15 months, and just these past few weeks I've been able to finally start overcoming my troubles, and I'm sure what you're going through now is awful, and I can completely understand how you feel when you say you're restless, can't concentrate on anything, have crazy mood swings and cry a lot. I lovingly call that my 2007/2008 winter.

I have a feeling I can't sympathize with whatever exactly happened to you over the summer, but I understand the other feelings you're going through, even though I don't know what brought it on. It sucks a lot, but when you get through it, even though once in a while it may come back and bite you and get you down for a short time -- you will feel so relieved and wonderful when you get through the especially tough times.

Venting is always good, no matter what the channel, and I'm now just blabbering on.

You'll always turn out fine, even on days where it seems completely hopeless.

I hope that helps. And if not, uh,

http://www.sweetteastudio.com/images/prints/45%20%20think%20happy%20thoughts.jpg

That's the first picture that comes up on Google when you search "happy thoughts". I think it might be a daisy.

[Jujubees2]

Hey Aggie,

How's things today? Hope you're felling better.

[Aggie]

Thanks for asking juju...I'm feeling better and I got through yesterday without crying so maybe posting about it really did help!

RoseBlood-Thank you for your heartfelt words. I know you have shared some personal stuff on this board and that you can understand how I'm feeling. You nailed it when you said a stressful week can bring it out or something I see or hear can bring everything rushing back. That's exactly what happened. You're sweet, thanks for caring!

Brett-You know I love ya! We go way back and I know you are there if I need you, thanks for reinforcing that fact. Too bad we can't go smoke in my backyard and watch Pootytang right now.

Funkman! You're always good for a smile, thanks. :smile:

Yes Commish, I'd say that's a daisy. Sorry you've gone through sucky times too. We'll survive and be stronger for it!

[drjoek]

You'll always have us here at .net for a couple of laughs.
Plus its a beautiful fall day.:thumbup:

Smile:smile:

[Jennitalia]

turn that frown upsided down!

smile, dammit!


aggie, youre one of my favorites here. coolest chick, gorgeous, nice rack :), and funny as hell. you have a hell of a lot of people that care about you and are here for you. i hope this gets easier for you.

[commish13]

Happiness and joy for everyone!

[JerseyRich]

When you feel down...just think of all the creepy guys on this board that love you and would like to cheer you up even if it meant putting down their lego sets or Nintendo Wii's.

[Furtherman]

When you feel down...just think of all the creepy guys on this board that love you and would like to cheer you up even if it meant putting down their lego sets or Nintendo Wii's.

Yea! And I have neither!




*puts down lincoln logs*

[Misteriosa]

http://explodingdog.com/drawing/cheerup.gif

[britneypablo]

i hope you keep in mind that everything good and bad always passes....so cherish the good and grit through the bad....whenever i need a little cheering up i watch this....it might not do for you what it does for me but it always makes me smile

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ZCYaw5tGYAs&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ZCYaw5tGYAs&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

[Tall_James]

I think you're a funny and great person.

So there.

A stranger from Massachusetts thinks you're awesome.

[Aggie]

Ugh, it's been up and down the last two weeks and I think I know why.

I alluded in my original post that something happened this summer. Well, in July I had a miscarriage. It was awful and in general I am over it but it's still hard. The baby would have been due this month and I've been thinking about it a lot lately even though I'm trying not to.

We've been trying again and it hasn't happened yet. I know miscarriages happen to almost 25% of all women who get pregnant and it does not mean I can't have lots of healthy babies in the future. The majority of the time I really am fine, just not right now. Emotions can really take over sometimes and I feel out of control right now. It's very frustrating not to be able to re-focus my sadness and melancholy to something productive. It's just not happening.

You really don't need to respond. I just needed to get it out of me since I have so much inside at the moment.

[Contra]

Sorry to see you are having trouble. Good luck with your efforts to bare a child! I'm mentally sending you hugs and prayers.

[A.J.]

I'm really sorry to hear that Aggie. I hope you feel better. On the bright side, think of all the fun in trying again to have a baby!

[Thebazile78]

Ugh, it's been up and down the last two weeks and I think I know why.

I alluded in my original post that something happened this summer. Well, in July I had a miscarriage. It was awful and in general I am over it but it's still hard. The baby would have been due this month and I've been thinking about it a lot lately even though I'm trying not to.

We've been trying again and it hasn't happened yet. I know miscarriages happen to almost 25% of all women who get pregnant and it does not mean I can't have lots of healthy babies in the future. The majority of the time I really am fine, just not right now. Emotions can really take over sometimes and I feel out of control right now. It's very frustrating not to be able to re-focus my sadness and melancholy to something productive. It's just not happening.

You really don't need to respond. I just needed to get it out of me since I have so much inside at the moment.

I know how hard that can be, from a friends and family standpoint, that is. You don't want to ask about it and you don't want to say the wrong thing and you want your friend/family member to know that you love and support her no matter what happens.

One of my best friends from grammar school had two miscarriages; she's now expecting and due next month. Also, one of my cousins had fertility problems and a stillbirth before she had her (healthy, normal) son last May. I have more friends than I can name who've also gone through this first-hand, and it's hard to offer support without making someone feel badly. I am confident that you will get through this and you will be OK.

But, I can empathize a lot about the pregnancy loss and the feelings of hopelessness and uselessness. At the time I talked to my friend, I was reading a lot about pregnancy and infant loss, so it was strange to get the direct in-person experience at that time.

[Jujubees2]

So sorry to hear about it Aggie. Hang in there. My wife had a miscarriage between kids one and two and she was down for a while, thinking about it and how we may not be able to have any more kids. But everything worked out and I'm sure it will for you too.

[boosterp]

I am sorry to hear this and only wish you the best. I know first hand how bad up and down days can be and I know with the support of your husband you will come out of this fog.

[Crippler]

So sorry to hear about the tough time you've been having. And even though most of us only know you as a screenname on the internet, there's a lot of love & positive energy being sent your way, if you believe in that kind of thing.

I'm sure if you've shared this story with the outside world you've already heard a hundred stories from people who've had a similar things happen & went on to have wonderful families & live happily ever after. Well, I don't know how much those help, but here's story number one-hundred & one, hoping it cheers you up at least a little: my cousin & his wife had a similarly tough first-go at making a family. But they took their time & all the doctor recommended precautions & had a healthy baby boy not long after! After that a healthy baby girl followed that within another 18 months or so.

So keep your thoughts positive and soak in all the goodness thats your friends (& us e-friends) are sending you.

[topless_mike]

sorry to hear yo.
its tough being a man, i guess, because we are less emotionally connected to things than women.

all i can say is that you can't move forward without accepting the past. i know, it sux, it hurtz, but you've got to let it go. it is what it is, and nothing you can do can change it.

sorry to come across as an ass. just wanted to add my .02

:)

[Aggie]

sorry to hear yo.
its tough being a man, i guess, because we are less emotionally connected to things than women.

all i can say is that you can't move forward without accepting the past. i know, it sux, it hurtz, but you've got to let it go. it is what it is, and nothing you can do can change it.

sorry to come across as an ass. just wanted to add my .02

:)

Smilies make everything better.

Thanks for the support guys. I need it and I feel the love!

[Friday]

it's good to vent, Aggie.
i am glad you feel comfortable sharing with us and i will keep you and your hub in my thoughts....and pray for babies in your future.

http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-hug001.gif

[WampusCrandle]

it's good to just let it out!

http://i131.photobucket.com/albums/p282/jestered/calvin_and_hobbes_hugging.jpg

i posted recently about feeling down, and just posting can release stress. at any rate, try to feel better! hugs forever, Aggie!

[RoseBlood]

I am so sorry Aggie. I can not even begin to know what you are feeling, but I certainly empathize. I hope reading all of these success stories has helped you in some way, as there is comfort in numbers. It in no ways diminishes your pain and I wish for you and your husband, all the happiness a family can bring in whatever capacity is meant too be.

[biggestmexi]

yes indeed