My dickhead cousin is in jail...again

[Snoogans]

And apparently no one is happy since he made it all the way to me on a bail call.

So the story goes, he has a son who I believe is 5 years old right now. I think my cousin is like 2 years behind on support. the mother and her new husband were arrested for smokin weed IN THE APARTMENT while he was in the bedroom. So now my cousin's parents of custody of his son, and he lives with my grandmother probably 4 blocks away. HE NEVER GOES TO SEE HIS KID. so about 2 years ago he was arrested, someone bailed him out, he got even, and then apparently NEVER PAID IT AGAIN. He was arrested like 3 weeks ago and bailed out again. This time, apparently, after making bail, he never went and dealt with the money he still owed.

So on Christmas, he was a complete dick. i almost got into a fight with him, as always. he had like a couple bloody scabs on his face from when he scratches himself when he cant get any coke. He tends to scratch and then pick at that shit when he is jonesin, so Ive learned. Then Yesterday they pick him up again. Though I am glad to see that no one is bailin his ass out this time, I'm just so sick of everything.

he wont listen to anything I say cause I'm younger and so what do I know. I'm done fighting him cause that never seems to do anything but upset other family members. Most importantly, I think I'm fuckin done feeling sad over this shit. Ive done what I can (which really isnt much) to help his son out with a few things, bought him a skateboard, tried to at least be there sometimes. I will never stop that, cause I can't. But I'm fuckin done feeling bad for, worrying about, having it cause me sadness and pain, fuckin done with that shit.

Guess I needed to rant that. And its offtopic because my cousin deserves to be made fun of, but if you can, try to go easy on me. I've seen far too many people in my family fuck up and I dont really need my balls busted on this one. Thanks

[Snoogans]

and id also like to personally thank the bunch of you who were in chat tonight. I was really in a terrible mood when I went in there and you guys really cheered me up alot. And it was good to have mooch there, sort of, for a little bit

[PapaBear]

Ever since I spent a little time in jail, I've come to realize that the best way to get someone to straighten their shit out is to do the time. I spent 2 years trying to convince my family of that when it came to one of my nephews. He kept getting busted, then bailed out when he'd call crying. They'd hire a good lawyer, and a judge would be convinced to give him another chance. About six months ago, he used up all the judge's patience, and he ended up doing a few months. He's not perfect now, but he's trying a hell of lot harder to no fuck up.

Let the fucker sit in jail for a while reading books and eating shitty food.

[disneyspy]

i didnt quit my shennanigans til i did some real time,let him sit and you didnt get him into trouble so dont feel guilty

[Friday]

i don't like that you are having to deal with this guy.
but knowing you, i accept that you will do what you have to for family, even if it is well above and beyond what is expected.

I hope this jerk learns his lesson... and I hope he owns up to what he owes. And if not then I pray for your family to deal with this as best as they can.

I hope you can put this aside and enjoy the blessings you have in your life right now, Shaun.
Those are most important. :happy:

[Snoogans]

yea ive been tryin to work on that today. I dont think ive handled shit internally the best way up to this point and tonight I spent alot of time tryin to sort it out and get some shit together.

[Snoogans]

Also, I kinda want to add, its been extra hard for me cause my dad left when I was little, and I never talked to him after that before he died. So it kinda pains me a little extra to see his dad is 4 fuckin blocks away and wont be a dad. I just don't understand how he could be like that.

[topless_mike]

Also, I kinda want to add, its been extra hard for me cause my dad left when I was little, and I never talked to him after that before he died. So it kinda pains me a little extra to see his dad is 4 fuckin blocks away and wont be a dad. I just don't understand how he could be like that.

thats the tough part man. normally, i'd say he's gotta learn tough love. maybe jail will be that wake up call he needs.

but its his son thats suffering most. i cant and wont even try to imagine whats thats like (not having your dad around). all i can say is STEP UP. dont try to be his kid's dad, but be somebody he can talk to and do the dad shit with.
you'll help him through this, and it will also help you mature. (not saying that you are immature to begin with...)

[Snoogans]

thats the tough part man. normally, i'd say he's gotta learn tough love. maybe jail will be that wake up call he needs.

but its his son thats suffering most. i cant and wont even try to imagine whats thats like (not having your dad around). all i can say is STEP UP. dont try to be his kid's dad, but be somebody he can talk to and do the dad shit with.
you'll help him through this, and it will also help you mature. (not saying that you are immature to begin with...)

I appreciate the advice. I do it the best I can. I work evenings and he is in school during the day. And my days off are monday and tuesday right now, so its tough to get to see him. I know my uncle is there for him too, thats who he is living with now, my aunt and uncle. I definately gotta get him a new skateboard though. He outgrew the mini one I gave him and he is 5, so its about time he jumps on the full size board. He is NASTY too. FEARLESS.

first day i gave him the smaller board, he was like 3 years old, he walked up this huge hill that I wouldnt even skate down near his house, and BOMBED IT. Like it was nothing.

[Friday]

you know what, love... this guy is probably doing less harm being out of his kids life than being in it.
as sad as that is... he will not be around to inflict hurt upon the child and god willing the kid will grow to be stable and loved...

as much as it makes me want to scream... some men just aren't meant to be fathers.
and it shows ...

but life without a "real" dad can be just as fulfilling ... after all, you have a ton of love in your heart to give.

[topless_mike]

I appreciate the advice. I do it the best I can. I work evenings and he is in school during the day. And my days off are monday and tuesday right now, so its tough to get to see him. I know my uncle is there for him too, thats who he is living with now, my aunt and uncle. I definately gotta get him a new skateboard though. He outgrew the mini one I gave him and he is 5, so its about time he jumps on the full size board. He is NASTY too. FEARLESS.

first day i gave him the smaller board, he was like 3 years old, he walked up this huge hill that I wouldnt even skate down near his house, and BOMBED IT. Like it was nothing.

do you still skate? prob not with your injury. i was gonna say that would be awesome bonding time.

[Snoogans]

do you still skate? prob not with your injury. i was gonna say that would be awesome bonding time.

ill still skate around on flat land but i try to avoid hills and any place with rails and shit cause I get tempted.

Im not allowed to snowboard anymore either :glurps:

[cougarjake13]

Ever since I spent a little time in jail, I've come to realize that the best way to get someone to straighten their shit out is to do the time. I spent 2 years trying to convince my family of that when it came to one of my nephews. He kept getting busted, then bailed out when he'd call crying. They'd hire a good lawyer, and a judge would be convinced to give him another chance. About six months ago, he used up all the judge's patience, and he ended up doing a few months. He's not perfect now, but he's trying a hell of lot harder to no fuck up.

Let the fucker sit in jail for a while reading books and eating shitty food.

really is the best advice


my parents did the same with my brother, kept bailing him out


he didnt straighten out until he spent 6 months in jail

[~Katja~]

Also, I kinda want to add, its been extra hard for me cause my dad left when I was little, and I never talked to him after that before he died. So it kinda pains me a little extra to see his dad is 4 fuckin blocks away and wont be a dad. I just don't understand how he could be like that.

you know, some dad's can be true ass holes...selfish and immature.

I do have a question though, does he have a job? Because if he does it should come straight out of his paycheck... without him physically paying the court.

If not, doesn't it get withheld from tax returns as well???

I don't know... there are too many people out there that think paying child support is for the mother or the custodial guardian of the child... it is NOT and they need to realize that.
It always makes me sad.... while my son's father pays he still keeps reminding me that I basically "steal" money from him... which is sad, given that I even agreed to 50% of what he should pay legally... and I really only use the money for his medical expenses and clothing... but at least he has an interest in seeing his kid... which would be really sad for my son if he didn't.

I am really sorry for your cousin's son. It sounds like he is going through so much at such a young age... and it must be confusing the heck out of him. I hope your cousin's parents are able to give him a good home and feel loved... that's what matters the most.

Maybe you can become somewhat involved in the little boys life, it sounds like he is in need of a male figure who will have fun with him.

[A.J.]

I have an uncle like that. Jail time for him 35 years ago would have spared us all a lot of grief.

[Snoogans]

you know, some dad's can be true ass holes...selfish and immature.

I do have a question though, does he have a job? Because if he does it should come straight out of his paycheck... without him physically paying the court.



I am really sorry for your cousin's son. It sounds like he is going through so much at such a young age... and it must be confusing the heck out of him. I hope your cousin's parents are able to give him a good home and feel loved... that's what matters the most.

Maybe you can become somewhat involved in the little boys life, it sounds like he is in need of a male figure who will have fun with him.
I guess he works somewhat cause he always has money for cigarettes and shit like that, but I don't think he officially has a job where they can go after his pay checks. I don't talk to him enough to know what he has goin on. Its always some nonsense he will tell anyway.

As for his son, thankfully my aunt and uncle do everything they can for him, so he seems to be ok. At least when I see him, he is always happy.

[zildjian361]

my daughter has a kid in the hospital for 2 years THEY MADE T SHIRTS SHREAD FOR MIKEY TRY IT IT HELPS