I Need A New Slogan

[DiabloSammich]

Spring is almost here, and I'm looking to revamp the image of my landscape company, and I'd like to start with a snappy new slogan, something that really grabs the people's attention.


Any ideas?

[underdog]

DiabloSammich's Landscaping : Fuck Jews.

[epo]

"We've got the cheapest labor!"

[Gvac]

Spring is almost here, and I'm looking to revamp the image of my landscape company, and I'd like to start with a snappy new slogan, something that really grabs the people's attention.


Any ideas?

What's your current slogan?

[Slumbag]

If our workers lose a limb, YOU DON'T PAY!!!!!

[DiabloSammich]

DiabloSammich's Landscaping : Fuck Jews.



Jews like to spend their money on shrubbery just like everyone else. Let's try again.

[underdog]

Jews like to spend their money on shrubbery just like everyone else. Let's try again.

DiabloSammich's Landscaping : Fuck Jews Sexually.

[Gvac]

How about "Whackin' the weed, plantin' the seed"?

[DiabloSammich]

What's your current slogan?



"I got two turntables and microphone."



It has nothing to do with landscaping, but I really dig that song.

[jauble]

How about "I never faked sleep while getting jerked off in a sleeping bag as a youngster. I also know landscaping."

[DiabloSammich]

DiabloSammich's Landscaping : Fuck Jews Sexually.



Are Jews the ones that are circumcised, or not?

I can never remember.

[King Hippos Bandaid]

Diablo Sammich's Landscaping, we landscape your house until it forecloses on ya

[Kevin]

"I got two turntables and microphone."



It has nothing to do with landscaping, but I really dig that song.

Diablo Sammich: YYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU'RRRRRRR FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RRRRRED

[Gvac]

"I'll go in the bush when your husband won't"

[Judge Smails]

"Can't we all just get a lawn?"

[DiabloSammich]

How about "I never faked sleep while getting jerked off in a sleeping bag as a youngster. I also know landscaping."


Too wordy.


And it might not be entirely accurate. There's one summer there that's a little hazy.

[midwestjeff]

Diablo's Landscaping: Only the finest imported laborers.

[jauble]

DS Landscaping: No Documentation, No Weeds.

[Tenbatsuzen]

Diablo's: "I'll fucking find you with Google. AND YOU WILL PAY"

[Tenbatsuzen]

"Can't we all just get a lawn?"

This may be a winner.

[jauble]

"Can't we all just get a lawn?"

Booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

http://crazy-frankenstein.com/pictures-files/the-simpsons-homer-pictures/HomerSimpson38.gif

[Enabler]

"Turn Green into Green"
"Green Power!"
"Trim that bush"
"Go Green"
"Green it up"
"Green!"

...and im spent

[King Hippos Bandaid]

Diablo Sammich's Landscape,

"we are not a pain in your grass"

"Not the cool DSL for your computer"

"Too Lazy to be man and do your chores, call us"

"Turned on by Smelly Mexicans , call us"

[Tenbatsuzen]

"Turn Green into Green"
"Green Power!"
"Trim that bush"
"Go Green"
"Green it up"
"Green!"

...and im spent

This sounds like, no lie, a meeting we had discussing a new marketing project. They wanted do something with the environment. Why, I have no fucking clue, since we do nothing with the environment, and being green does not help our business.

[DiabloSammich]

Let's try and work with some bullet points:

Alcoholic

Rules with iron fist

Only employs fully documented workers (you see what I'm doing? I'm winking)

Kind of cares about the job we do

[DiabloSammich]

Diablo Sammich's Landscape,


"Not the cool DSL for your computer"
"


Fuck you for making me giggle at a stupid joke.

[midwestjeff]

Diablo's Landscaping: If you're not satisfied, I'll beat a mexican.

[Knowledged_one]

They arent illegal if they blink twice for si

[King Hippos Bandaid]

Diablo Sammich''s Landscaping

"Ill make Mexicans eat grass trimmings in front of you for your amusement"

[PanterA]

We trim bush

[underdog]

DiabloSammich Landscaping : Drunk? Fisting? Jews.

[DiabloSammich]

DiabloSammich Landscaping : Drunk? Fisting? Jews.




Fucking gold.

[midwestjeff]

DiabloSammich Landscaping : Drunk? Fisting? Jews.

Holy shit.
:lol::lol::lol:
Lock it up.

[PapaBear]

Diablo's: "I'll fucking find you with Google. AND YOU WILL PAY"
DAMMIT! You stole mine.

[boosterp]

Diablo Sammich's Landscaping, we landscape your house until it forecloses on ya

"I'll go in the bush when your husband won't"

Diablo's: "I'll fucking find you with Google. AND YOU WILL PAY"

Diablo's Landscaping: If you're not satisfied, I'll beat a mexican.

All these made my drunk ass laugh.

"I drink, I beat mexicans, and you lawn gets done proper."

[joethebartender]

whatever you choose; don't forget to include:

"...ask our laborers about cash specials!"

[led37zep]

Mexican't....DiabloCan!

[drjoek]

"Jump in the back of the pickup!!"

[Tall_James]

"Go Green Without Driving A Hybrid"

"We make it easy being green" (nods to Kermit)

"Blades of Glory" (lawnmover or grass blades)

"Weed and Feed without the Greed"

"Lawn Stylists"

"Roots Never Sleep"

"The grass Is greener on the other side because we do that property"

"You watch the grass grow - we'll take care of it"

[Enabler]

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2071/2281363342_07f120fa02.jpg?v=0

The Lawn Wranglers

[Bossanova]

Making Delaware less shitty, one lawn at a time

[~Katja~]

Spring is almost here, and I'm looking to revamp the image of my landscape company, and I'd like to start with a snappy new slogan, something that really grabs the people's attention.


Any ideas?

"DiabloSammich Landscaping: For when you want the best kept yard on Google Earth"

[hydee]

Spring is almost here, and I'm looking to revamp the image of my landscape company, and I'd like to start with a snappy new slogan, something that really grabs the people's attention.


Any ideas?

"We don't just mow lawns, we create dreamscapes."

[Tall_James]

"A lawn as lush as a drunk on a three day bender"

[Tall_James]

"Only faggots have brown grass and weeds"

[Tall_James]

"Don't be THAT neighbor"

[Tall_James]

"Dog piss kills lawns - we kill dogs"

[cougarjake13]

DS Landscaping : RON AND FEZ NOON TO 3

[marky2bucks]

Take advantage of immigrant labor!

[disneyspy]

geez lady,trim that thing

[Creeptub]

DS Landscaping: Hey, we could just look in your window.

[MC Pee Pants]

Your emotions make you a monster- Jello Biafra