Do A Line Or Two!

[FUNKMAN]

No Not That Kind Of Line!

Not sure if this has been done already cause I'm pretty new but I like to joke around, but sometimes them long storied jokes lose your interest before you get to the punchline. Post any jokes you have that are one or two lines long, such as:

1.What's the difference between a Harley and A Hoover?

2. Did you hear about the new restaurant on the moon?


Answer:

1. The location of the dirtbag

2. Good food but no atmosphere

Take a few minutes to catch your breath and post a few!

FUNKMAN

<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">

[sketchy]

wow am i disappointed...now i'm on my hands and knees combing through the carpret tasting whatever white specks i can find.

<IMG SRC="http://johnrobertreed.50megs.com/images/flyingpills-1.jpg">

[Ants In My Pants]

Do a Line Or Two!Oh, I thought you were answering Rooster Sucks' "How can I stay on the wagon?" thread.

[IkeaBoy]

and you don't find child molester humour funny?

-----
<img src="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ikeaboymoviepic/files/rr.jpg">
"My review of 2001 the year is the same as my review of 2001: A Space Odyssey- overlong, hard to follow, and only enjoyable if you're really really stoned." - Lewis Black
"and I spent 14 years as a nuke"- <a href="http://www.capalert.com">CAPALERT</a> Guy on Harry Potter- Reviews, Jesus Style

[F1Gm3nT]

Im not even gonna touch this one

[img]http://my.purerave.com/gallery/p/33435.jpg[img]

F!G@mu5 Pr1m3
President of the oficial R&F Dragon Club

[TooCute]

what's the difference
between a fish and a pig?


they both have fins, except
for the pig.


http://members.hometown.aol.com/_ht_a/sheeplovr2/images/wonderwoman22.jpg

[TheGameHHH]

A guy walks into a bar and says, 'Ouch!'

IT'S TIME TO PLAY THE GAME-AHHH!

<IMG SRC="http://www.burntrailradio.com/RFnetTheGameHHH.jpg">

[Pootertoot]

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

Because he was dead.


Okay, so it's not that funny. But a three year old told me that joke. There's nothing funnier than a three year old trivializing the concept of death.

Well, unless it's a dead three year old.

With bloody underoos.

<embed src="http://hometown.aol.com/slfcallednowhere/mario2.swf" width=300 height=100>
Censored, Because I'm a Responsible Moderator, who fucks children in the ass.

[IkeaBoy]

Well, unless it's a dead three year old.

With bloody underoos. Wow, puberty's hitting those young broads earlier and earlier. someone get me a McShake with a roofie and a ride to the nearest pre-school.

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<img src="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ikeaboymoviepic/files/rr.jpg">
"My review of 2001 the year is the same as my review of 2001: A Space Odyssey- overlong, hard to follow, and only enjoyable if you're really really stoned." - Lewis Black
"and I spent 14 years as a nuke"- <a href="http://www.capalert.com">CAPALERT</a> Guy on Harry Potter- Reviews, Jesus Style

[SweetPea]

with every post I read I wonder if its safe for me to be here?

I'm a 16 yr old gurl from L.I....and...I'm the Sweetest Pea in the Pod! :D
-+-Forever feeding the addiction known as RonFez.net!!-+-

[IkeaBoy]

with every post I read I wonder if its safe for me to be hereno charges have been filed against us yet

-----
<img src="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ikeaboymoviepic/files/rr.jpg">
"My review of 2001 the year is the same as my review of 2001: A Space Odyssey- overlong, hard to follow, and only enjoyable if you're really really stoned." - Lewis Black
"and I spent 14 years as a nuke"- <a href="http://www.capalert.com">CAPALERT</a> Guy on Harry Potter- Reviews, Jesus Style

[The Blowhard]

How did Hitler tie his shoes?
In little Nazis! ;)

"It takes good taste to truly appreciate bad taste"-John Waters

[The Blowhard]

What's green and sings?

Frank Snotra! Elvis Parsley!

"It takes good taste to truly appreciate bad taste"-John Waters

[The Blowhard]

What goes ha ha plop?

A man laughing his head off!


"It takes good taste to truly appreciate bad taste"-John Waters

[GvacNoMore]

Is it OK to date a nun?

As long as you don't get into the habit!

<img src="http://www.ltrooster.homestead.com/files/GVACanima.gif">

Thanks, Rooster!

[FUNKMAN]

1. Did you hear about the guy born with no left side of his body?

2. (Made this one up myself) What lubrication do Bullfighters use during sex?

Answer:

1. He turned out Allright

2. Oil Of OLay(as in O'le, like when there working the red flag, I'll work on it!)

<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">

[Gwen]

Why did the cookie go to the hospital?

Cause he felt crummy! Lol!!!

Whats black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle. (the kids I babysit for told me this one)

<img src=http://members.hometown.aol.com/_ht_a/sheeplovr2/images/gwenlovschestersiggy.jpg>
<b>"If life gives you lemons, squeeze the juice into a water gun and shoot other people in the eyes."</b>

[Tazz1376]

Whats black and white and red all over?

A nun in a blender.

<img src=http://tazz1376.homestead.com/files/tazz.jpg>
Thanks Rooster

[TooCute]

How do you eat a frog?

One leg over each ear!


http://members.hometown.aol.com/_ht_a/sheeplovr2/images/wonderwoman22.jpg

[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

What's the opposite of above me?

<IMG SRC="http://members.home.net/vitamin.d/referencepix/fuzzybutt.jpg">

[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

How do you get a nun pregnant?


You fuck her.

<IMG SRC="http://members.home.net/vitamin.d/referencepix/fuzzybutt.jpg">

[FezNotRon]

Well, I'm still angry that this thread isn't about what I thought it was about, but...

Man walks into a bar...ouch.

Blind man walks past a fish market...hi ladies!



*****************************
I get it. I get jokes.
*****************************

[wilee]

A Priest a Rabbi and an Indian walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, some kind of joke?"

<IMG SRC="http://cwjr.home.infi.net/wileegun.gif">

[The Blowhard]

A three legged dog walks into a saloon in the old west and shouts: "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw"!

"It takes good taste to truly appreciate bad taste"-John Waters

[FUNKMAN]

A horse walks into the bar, bartender says "Hey, Why The Long Face"

Did you ever smell moth balls?
Ain't it tough getting their legs open?

FUZZBUTT - below me? Strange coming from a Lady, but intriguing!





<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">

[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

What do you call a woman with one leg?

Ilene


What do you call an Asian woman with one leg?

Irene

<IMG SRC="http://members.home.net/vitamin.d/referencepix/fuzzybutt.jpg">

[FUNKMAN]

Went out to eat at the local Chinese restaurant and took the waitress home that night. We made love but an hour later I was horny again!

<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">

[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

FUZZBUTT - below me? Strange coming from a Lady, but intriguing!


Who you callin' a "lady?"


Where do you find a dog with no legs?

Right where you left him.


What do you call a dog with no legs?

What's the point in calling him? He's not going to come anyway!

<IMG SRC="http://members.home.net/vitamin.d/referencepix/fuzzybutt.jpg">

[Tazz1376]

Man walks into a bar...ouch.


It took me forever to get this one.

<img src=http://tazz1376.homestead.com/files/tazz.jpg>
Thanks Rooster


This message was edited by Tazz1376 on 1-9-02 @ 8:07 PM

[FUNKMAN]

Did you hear how the Catholics make Holy Water?
They get tap water and boil the HELL out of it!

I just heard Jeffrey Dahmer had to move out of his apartment. He needed more elbow room!



<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">

[Sheeplovr]

So the doctor says just ru some cream on it and it will clear up in a week but till then i shoulds get to close to people

number 333 its the way to be
http://members.hometown.aol.com/_ht_a/walrus701/images/breadsig.jpg
POWER AND CHAOS

[The Blowhard]

When is a door not a door?
When it's ajar! Ha ha!

"It takes good taste to truly appreciate bad taste"-John Waters

[FUNKMAN]

If a Hindu married a Jew, would they worship the Cow Manura?

1.Where did Hitler put his armies?

2. Why did the Italians lose the last war?

1. In his sleevies

2. Cause they ordered Zitis instead of Shells





<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">

[wilee]

So a dyslexic walks into a bra...

<IMG SRC="http://cwjr.home.infi.net/wileegun.gif">

[Zipgun]

Two Irish guys walk past a bar...


What? It could happen.

<img src=http://www.virtue.nu/atamichimpo/letitbesig.jpg width="200" height="150>

[Pootertoot]

How are Michael Jackson and Campbell's Soup alike?

They both come in small cans.

<embed src="http://hometown.aol.com/slfcallednowhere/mario2.swf" width=300 height=100>
Censored, Because I'm a Responsible Moderator, who fucks children in the ass.

[FUNKMAN]

What is the difference between a Gay Guy and a Microwave?

The microwave doesn't brown your meat!

<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">

[CovDiesel]

What do ya call a cow who eats grass?

A cow... cows eat grass.

What's little, red, and squishy in your mouth?

A grape.

What is blue and white and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you?

A refridgerator wearing a denim jacket.

Thats all for now.. although there are many many more of them.

<IMG SRC="http://www.privatemailhost.com/RFnetDiesel.jpg">

[wilee]

Why aren't dogs allowed in Poland?

Because they pee on the Poles...

<IMG SRC="http://cwjr.home.infi.net/wileegun.gif">

[Big Jim]

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pool?
Bob.
Hangin on a wall?
Art.
In a pile of leaves?
Russel.
On your doorstep?
Matt.
What do you call two guys with no arms and no legs hangin on both sides of a window?
Kurt n' Rod.
Guy with no arms and no legs in front of an oncoming Semi?
Screwed.

Dumb Donald was so dumb. Instead of praying to God at church, he prays to... <img src = "http://members.aol.com/jimandbryan/myhomepage/rnfbigjim.jpg?mtbrand=AOL_US"> Thank you Jersey Rich for this sig!SEEEEEYUH!!
*BIG JIM*

[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

Who's cheese is that?

NaCHO cheese!

<IMG SRC="http://members.home.net/vitamin.d/referencepix/fuzzybutt.jpg">

[jafter]

How come smokey the bear doesn't have any kids?

Every time his wife gets hot he throws sand on her and beats her with a shovel.


<IMGSRC="http://www.ramseyltd.com/rascals/whoswho/stymie.jpg
">

[FUNKMAN]

1. Did you hear what they found in Jeffrey Dahmer's bathroom?

2. Did you hear what they found in Jeffrey Dahmer's refrigerator?


Answer:

1. Head and Shoulders
2. Arm and Hammer



<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">

[jafter]

Why don't blind people sky dive?

It scares the shit out of the dog.


<IMGSRC="http://www.ramseyltd.com/rascals/whoswho/stymie.jpg
">

[FUNKMAN]

Did you hear about the Rabbi who didn't charge for circumcisions?

He worked for tips(ouch!)

<img src="http://www.grandfunkrailroad.com/covers/allthe.gif">

[FUNKMAN]

Did you hear about the constipated mathmetician?

He worked it out with a pencil

<img src="http://www.grandfunkrailroad.com/covers/survival.gif">

[IkeaBoy]

What do you call someone without a sense of humour?

[/quote]
"My review of 2001 the year is the same as my review of 2001: A Space Odyssey- overlong, hard to follow, and only enjoyable if you're really really stoned." - Lewis Black
"and I spent 14 years as a nuke"- <a href="http://www.capalert.com">CAPALERT</a> Guy on Harry Potter- Reviews, Jesus Style

[FUNKMAN]

Whats the most famous saying at a gay bar?

Could i push your stool in :(

<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">