Squeeze Relish. Fuck You!

[Hottub]

The pickle companies tried to capitalize on the success of squeeze ketchup and mustard.
They failed miserably!
Instead of a nice, steady thread of relish on my dog, I got a bun saturated with relish juice and no relish!
They didn't properly figure out the physics of relish dispersion. And I am the one who has to suffer.

[HBox]

Clearly your mistake was using relish in the first place.

[Judge Smails]

https://www.pattersondental.com/itemImages/MediumSquare/images/34009.jpg
Problem solved.

[Contra]

Yeah I hear ya on this. Either it's juice running out with all the relish stuck in the hole, or half the bottle comes out when you squeeze harder to unclog it!

[TheMojoPin]

The pickle companies tried to capitalize on the success of squeeze ketchup and mustard.
They failed miserably!
Instead of a nice, steady thread of relish on my dog, I got a bun saturated with relish juice and no relish!
They didn't properly figure out the physics of relish dispersion. And I am the one who has to suffer.

Shake it, you fool. Just like mustard and ketchup in the squeeze bottles.

Though Hbox was right. Relish is vile. I'll bet money this whole was just code for Hottub jerking off with that glop.

[Hottub]

As contra so astutely noted, the relish gets clogged in the hole, even after a thorough shake.
And yes, every once in a while, I like a bit of relish on my dog. Kraut gets played out, and I don't always have time to make my world famous onions.

[Jughead]

Its not like a man handshake squeezing relish.... ..It feels like cheap shit,, believe be I know it when I feel it.....:smile:

[TheMojoPin]

I like a bit of relish on my dog. Kraut gets played out

Ugh.

There's no point in even having a hot dog since those messes just overwhelm everything with their flavor.

[KnoxHarrington]

Relish is getting you too close to one of those disgusting "Chicago style" monstrosities.

For me, I like some chili on it, some onions, a little mustard. That should do ya.

[Jughead]

Don't forget those lil peppers...:wink:

[Hottub]

Ugh.

There's no point in even having a hot dog since those messes just overwhelm everything with their flavor.

For somebody as educated as yourself, you really are dim sometimes.
A hot dog is basically bologna. There is no way to overpower the flavor of it.
The condiments simply enhance the experience. You could put a pound of chili on top, and still taste the dog.

When you eventually make good on your promise to come out here, we will get you a REAL pizza, a Taylor ham and egg on a bagel, and fuck you in the mouth.

[TheMojoPin]

Jesus Christ, you're a hot dog savage.

Do just put on a blindfold in the supermarket and just randomly grab a package of hot dogs?

Monster.

[Hottub]

Sabrett or Hebrew National ONLY!
Please don't judge, sir.

*EDIT* Thumanns too.

[KnoxHarrington]

I don't get people who buy cheap ass hot dogs. A pack of Hebrew Nationals is like $3 at the store here. There's no excuse to get the really cheap ones.

It's not like not being able to afford Kobe beef or something.

[Jughead]

I don't get people who buy cheap ass hot dogs. A pack of Hebrew Nationals is like $3 at the store here. There's no excuse to get the really cheap ones.

It's not like not being able to afford fillet Mignon or something.

X3 I fixed it for ya ...:smile:

[Contra]

I don't get people who buy cheap ass hot dogs. A pack of Hebrew Nationals is like $3 at the store here. There's no excuse to get the really cheap ones.

It's not like not being able to afford Kobe beef or something.

They're $6 here.

I get Nathans

[Gvac]

It's either chili or ketchup on my dogs.

Nothing else.

[Hottub]

Ketchup?
Are you 5?

[Gvac]

Ketchup?
Are you 5?

Come on, Tub! I'm younger than you, but not THAT much younger!

[Recyclerz]

OK, squeeze relish = bad.

But I hope it is still OK to relish Squeeze. Those boys were great.

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[ecobag2]

https://www.pattersondental.com/itemImages/MediumSquare/images/34009.jpg
Problem solved.

agreed.

the trick is getting the 1/8 or so of relish that winds up stuck in the bottom of the bottle.

a hard rap and a cap removal should do of course.

[razorboy]

OK, squeeze relish = bad.

But I hope it is still OK to relish Squeeze. Those boys were great.


I'm tempted. I don't need another nail in my heart.

[HBox]

It's either chili or ketchup on my dogs.

Nothing else.

I don't think I've ever said this to you but you are a great man with great taste.

[jauble]

I have made my judgement on this. Squeeze relish is fucked, buy a jar and use a spoon. A hotdog is built for condiments.

[Hottub]

I have made my judgement on this. Squeeze relish is fucked, buy a jar and use a spoon. A hotdog is built for condiments.

That, my friends, is why jauble rules this forum!

*tips hat*

[PapaBear]

I relish chili, onions, and mustard on my dogs.


BTW... Has anyone seen those dogs that say they are 100% pure Angus? Come on! I love a good quality dog, but is it really going to be better if it comes from the scraps of an Angus cow over the scraps of a regular cow?

[Hottub]

I relish chili, onions, and mustard on my dogs.


BTW... Has anyone seen those dogs that say they are 100% pure Angus? Come on! I love a good quality dog, but is it really going to be better if it comes from the scraps of an Angus cow over the scraps of a regular cow?

It's common knowlege that hot dogs are lips and assholes.

I'm just waiting for Kobe lips and assholes!
http://blog.menupirate.com/images/drooling_homer.png

[sailor]

I relish chili, onions, and mustard on my dogs.


BTW... Has anyone seen those dogs that say they are 100% pure Angus? Come on! I love a good quality dog, but is it really going to be better if it comes from the scraps of an Angus cow over the scraps of a regular cow?

why wouldn't it?

[PapaBear]

It's common knowlege that hot dogs are lips and assholes.

I'm just waiting for Kobe lips and assholes!

They say Kobe rectum. But he was acquitted.

[Hottub]

They say Kobe rectum. But he was acquitted.

:clap::clap:

[joethebartender]

I've always been one for a Thumann's natural casing dog wit mustard and kraut (or some hot sauce) on a martin's potato roll.

Lately I find I'd rather have a bratwurst, instead of a hot dog, on a Portuguese roll with the kraut and mustard.

Real mustard =

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51MFkKs5r8L._SL500_AA280_PIbundle-6,TopRight,0,0_AA280_SH20_.jpg

or even this is acceptable:
http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/31JYKYB03XL._SL500_AA268_.jpg

Dijon is OK too, but not so great on a dog or brat. I use it more for sauces and dressings.



THIS IS NOT MUSTARD!!! (People who buy this shit should be shot):
http://img4.realsimple.com/images/food-recipes/shopping-storing/0505/frenchs-mustard_300.jpg

(and it you put ketchup on a hot dog after age 10... you should have your face put to the grill.)

[silks]

Instead of relish, I like a slice of pickle on my hot dog, and of course, the ultimate condiment...

https://www.wegmans.com/prodimg/296/200/073060809296.jpg


At Super Duper Weenie in Fairfield, CT you can get one with Sauerkraut, Bacon, Mustard, and Raw Onion - awesome.

[IMSlacker]

It's either chili or ketchup on my dogs.

Nothing else.

Good one, Gvac imposter. You almost had me fooled.

[sailor]

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51Z262MBD2L._SL500_AA280_PIbundle-9,TopRight,0,0_AA280_SH20_.jpg

[Recyclerz]

I'm tempted. I don't need another nail in my heart.

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/No homo.

/Well, only a li'l.

[Recyclerz]

It's common knowlege that hot dogs are lips and assholes.

I'm just waiting for Kobe lips and assholes!
http://blog.menupirate.com/images/drooling_homer.png

X2O (http://www.xaviars.com/yonkers/dylan.html)

Great restaurant in Yonkers, X2O, has Kobe beef hot dogs. They taste like a good bratwurst.

[A.J.]

Do you have the same problem squeezing relish out of a condiment packet?

Practice makes perfect.

[boosterp]

As contra so astutely noted, the relish gets clogged in the hole, even after a thorough shake.
And yes, every once in a while, I like a bit of relish on my dog. Kraut gets played out, and I don't always have time to make my world famous onions.

You are dead to me.

I've always been one for a Thumann's natural casing dog wit mustard and kraut (or some hot sauce) on a martin's potato roll.

Lately I find I'd rather have a bratwurst, instead of a hot dog, on a Portuguese roll with the kraut and mustard.

Real mustard =

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51MFkKs5r8L._SL500_AA280_PIbundle-6,TopRight,0,0_AA280_SH20_.jpg

or even this is acceptable:
http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/31JYKYB03XL._SL500_AA268_.jpg

Dijon is OK too, but not so great on a dog or brat. I use it more for sauces and dressings.



THIS IS NOT MUSTARD!!! (People who buy this shit should be shot):
http://img4.realsimple.com/images/food-recipes/shopping-storing/0505/frenchs-mustard_300.jpg

(and it you put ketchup on a hot dog after age 10... you should have your face put to the grill.)

You sir are a god.

[Gvac]

THIS IS NOT MUSTARD!!! (People who buy this shit should be shot):
http://img4.realsimple.com/images/food-recipes/shopping-storing/0505/frenchs-mustard_300.jpg

(and it you put ketchup on a hot dog after age 10... you should have your face put to the grill.)

I use French's mixed with ketchup on my hamburgers.

Just ketchup on my hot dogs, though.

I also drink red wine with chicken and fish.

I'm a free thinker.

[Crispy123]

BTW... Has anyone seen those dogs that say they are 100% pure Angus? Come on! I love a good quality dog, but is it really going to be better if it comes from the scraps of an Angus cow over the scraps of a regular cow?

I would never purchase these myself but I did try an angus hotdog at my buddies house yesterday and it was a pretty tasty dog. Obviously I had spicy brown mustard and onions as they are the only acceptable condiments.

[Hottub]

I use French's mixed with ketchup on my hamburgers.

Just ketchup on my hot dogs, though.

I also drink red wine with chicken and fish.

I'm a free thinker.

Dead to me.

And a free thinker is the second worse thing you can call a man.

[Gvac]

I also only eat hot dogs from my butcher.

One hundred percent pure beef. I prefer the skinless ones.

You animals can buy your Thumann's sodium bombs and the like; I prefer to dine like a gentleman.

[sailor]

I also only eat hot dogs from my butcher.

One hundred percent pure beef. I prefer the skinless ones.

You animals can buy your Thumann's sodium bombs and the like; I prefer to dine like a gentleman.

sounds great (but skinless isn't as good - ya need that snap) but then you cover it in ketchup like a 7 year old girl.

[jauble]

I also drink red wine with chicken and fish.


White wine is for sailors. Im with you on this one.

[sink]

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3108/2771467546_75d60a29ec.jpg?v=0

[~Katja~]

I also only eat hot dogs from my butcher.

One hundred percent pure beef. I prefer the skinless ones.

You animals can buy your Thumann's sodium bombs and the like; I prefer to dine like a gentleman.

100% pure beef is a steak. You cant make any type of sausage or dog without throwing in fat and other things you are not told about.
And red wine goes with everything! But during the summer I enjoy a pinot grigio or sauvigion blanc every now and then.

[Farmer Dave]

100% pure beef is a steak. You cant make any type of sausage or dog without throwing in fat and other things you are not told about.
And red wine goes with everything! But during the summer I enjoy a pinot grigio or sauvigion blanc every now and then.

Listen to her gentlemen, she has wisdom beyond her years (even if those years are extensive:wink:).

[Farmer Dave]

Oh, and whine is for girls and f*gg*ts.

[Gvac]

White wine is for sailors. Im with you on this one.

Hahahahahahahahaha!!!

And when you say sailors you mean...well, you know!

[boosterp]

White wine goes good with anything but a good beer can make the dish.

[Hottub]

White wine is for sailors. Im with you on this one.

I was a sailor once.

[Gvac]

I was a sailor once.

That explains a lot...

[sailor]

fuck youse

[sink]

White wine goes good with anything but a good beer can make the dish.

Tell that to a Montrachet

[silks]

I also only eat hot dogs from my butcher.

I prefer ones that I know where they've come from too... especially when they contain meat that I've killed. Venison hot dogs are great. It's such a lean meat that you have to cut it with a little pork though. They kick ass after a morning in the slow cooker with some sauerkraut and beer.

[silks]

Oh, and whine is for girls and f*gg*ts.

I only drink wine that has a screw top.

http://pics.livejournal.com/adins/pic/0000aa90/s320x240

The American Classic, bitches.

[keithy_19]

I enjoy my hot dog plain, though occasionally i do enjoy chili and barbecue fried onions.

After going through this thread, I'm starving.

[TheMojoPin]

I enjoy my hot dog plain

*Sigh*

[Gvac]

While we're on the topic, everyone knows the mini pigs in a blanket OWN full size hot dogs.

I'll brook no argument on this.

[silks]

everyone knows the mini pigs in a blanket OWN full size hot dogs.

You'll get no argument from me. When my wife and I were planning our wedding we told the caterer that all we wanted were those mini-pigs-in-blankets. Nothing else.

[Gvac]

You'll get no argument from me. When my wife and I were planning our wedding we told the caterer that all we wanted were those mini-pigs-in-blankets. Nothing else.

You're proven once again to be a man of class and distinction, sir.

When I'm at a wedding and pigs in a blanket are served I know I'm in for a good time.

I usually duke one of the cocktail hour waitresses a ten spot and tell her to keep them coming.

I'm classy as well, you see.

[PapaBear]

BTW... Has anyone seen those dogs that say they are 100% pure Angus? Come on! I love a good quality dog, but is it really going to be better if it comes from the scraps of an Angus cow over the scraps of a regular cow?

why wouldn't it?
I just tried them. They're Ball Park. They taste like hot dogs.

[sailor]

I just tried them. They're Ball Park. They taste like hot dogs.

well la-di-da

[jauble]

well la-di-da

What do you call it?

[sailor]

What do you call it?

i was just referring to mr fancy-pants' angus dogs.

[jauble]

i was just referring to mr fancy-pants' angus dogs.

The correct response was a car hole

http://www.simpsoncrazy.com/content/pictures/regulars/MoeSzyslak1.gif

[RAAMONE]

chop up a boars head pickle...some mustard

and why are there so many hotdog threads on here

[jauble]

chop up a boars head pickle...some mustard

and why are there so many hotdog threads on here

A) The new job has made me somewhat lazy in role as fascist.

B) This is about relish and it was highjacked. I made my ruling on page one.