How to kill a squirrel

[keithy_19]

A squirrel got into my attic. He runs and bothers the fuck out of me. I want him dead. I want to be the one to kill him.

Any suggestions?

[jauble]

Poison your nuts

[Dude!]

A squirrel got into my attic. He runs and bothers the fuck out of me. I want him dead. I want to be the one to kill him.

Any suggestions?

wow...
i didn't expect a post like that
from a sensitive punk like you

[Furtherman]

You have to trap them, then you have two options. Take him far away, over a river and release because if you release it even miles away from your house, it'll come back to it's nest.

Or kill it.

[FrogSlayer]

b.b. gun. don't be afraid to cook that fucker up and serve it with some dumplings.

most important is to seal the hole where they enter or you will have the same problem again. You may need to prune some of your tree limbs hanging over the house.

[OGC]

I would think that since they are little more than rats with bushy tails, some good old rat poison (the green D-con pellets) would do the job. As a bonus, after they eat it, they will leave their home (your attic) and go outside searching for water. The little bastard will die out there.

[TheMojoPin]

b.b. gun. don't be afraid to cook that fucker up and serve it with some dumplings.

Gross. Why not just cut to the chase and cook up a rat?

[LordJezo]

I was out in the woods today with my 12 gauge. I had a whole bunch of squirrels in my sights as I was bored with nothing else to point my gun at but didn't pull the trigger as I was waiting for a buck. One just sat there on a branch screaming for a few minutes. I wonder who he was talking to.

To answer the question of this topic, I'd say that all I would have had to do is pull the trigger in order to kill a squirrel.

[SatCam]

just make him read one of your old posts and he'll probably just off himself

[STC-Dub]

How good is your insurance? Dynamite would work.

[keithy_19]

How good is your insurance? Dynamite would work.

I was thinking of just burning my house down, but then I thought that that is probably what the squirrel wants.

I was thinking of getting some poison. I'd shoot the fucker but that may be messy. If it's true that he'd go outside for water and die there, I'd love to find him and cut his head off and put it on a mini pike and put it outside my house.

[midwestjeff]

Kindness.

[PapaBear]

Ten foot python.

[led37zep]

Gross. Why not just cut to the chase and cook up a rat?
This way
The first step in preparing a tasty squirrel meal is to clean it quickly after the kill. The sooner the squirrel is cooked after it's taken, the better it will taste. You can freeze them to cook later, but they're best when fresh.

After cleaning the squirrel, cut it into individual pieces. Separate the hind legs and front legs from the carcass, then split the back into two sections.

Season the squirrel with seasoned salt and black pepper, then cook over a medium high charcoal grill for one hour or so. The older the squirrel, the more time it will take. No matter how young the squirrel is, it'll probably be a little chewier than a nice rib eye steak.

But the flavor will be excellent.

[OGC]

http://barfblog.foodsafety.ksu.edu/uploads/image/grey_squirrel_eat.jpg

[keithy_19]

Kindness.

I'd be kind to the squirrel if I had invited him into my home. Unfortunately for him, no such invitation was given.

[midwestjeff]

My money is on the rodent.

He's gonna walk all over you like you guys were dating.

[Jughead]

http://barfblog.foodsafety.ksu.edu/uploads/image/grey_squirrel_eat.jpg

:smile:

[jauble]

My fraternity house had a medium dog sized raccoon named Petey that lived in our attic, he was pretty cool.

[sr71blackbird]

Fill a water balloon with ammonia and coat it with peanut butter and toss it in the attic.
He will lick it and then bite it and his face will be suddenly flooded with the sweet smell of ammonia that they loooove so much and he will run out and tell all his friends.

[midwestjeff]

My fraternity house had a medium dog sized raccoon named Petey that lived in our attic, he was pretty cool.

I had raccoons in my college apartment. They were awesome. I would put food in the vent in the bathroom for them.
Also, I got some of the babies to eat out of my hand once when they wandered up onto my porch.

[jauble]

Fill a water balloon with ammonia and coat it with peanut butter and toss it in the attic.
He will lick it and then bite it and his face will be suddenly flooded with the sweet smell of ammonia that they loooove so much and he will run out and tell all his friends.

Or just get a trap, the peanut butter will work. SR I expected a response on the chicken man from your wtf thread.

[jauble]

I had raccoons in my college apartment. They were awesome. I would put food in the vent in the bathroom for them.
Also, I got some of the babies to eat out of my hand once when they wandered up onto my porch.

One of the guys fed Petey protein bars, it was just a cool animal and we lived in a symbiotic relationship. We didn't try to trap or kill him and he like a maniac animal went after a kid that tried to break into our attic.

[keithy_19]

Or just get a trap, the peanut butter will work. SR I expected a response on the chicken man from your wtf thread.

I'd poison the bastard but I'm afraid that it will just crawl under the eaves and die and stink up my house.

Where can I get a trap to kill squirrels?

[midwestjeff]

http://blogs.sfweekly.com/thesnitch/assets_c/2009/06/14876jw-thumb-500x582.jpg

[PapaBear]

I'd poison the bastard but I'm afraid that it will just crawl under the eaves and die and stink up my house.

Where can I get a trap to kill squirrels?
This (http://www.google.com/products?q=squirrel+trap&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&ie=UTF-8&ei=GnkkS_i7IIH8lAfew-D_CQ&sa=X&oi=product_result_group&ct=title&resnum=4&ved=0CDgQrQQwAw), or this (http://www.ehow.com/how_4925472_make-homemade-squirrel-traps.html).

Also, you're right about poison.

Forget about poisons, repellants (moth balls are a myth), etc. Rat poison will just have them rotting and smelling in your walls anyway. (http://www.factsfacts.com/MyHomeRepair/squirrels.htm)

[Death Metal Moe]

just make him read one of your old posts and he'll probably just off himself

lol

[monkfish]

I'd poison the bastard but I'm afraid that it will just crawl under the eaves and die and stink up my house.

Where can I get a trap to kill squirrels?

Havahart trap http://www.havahart.com/store/live-animal-traps/trap-size/small- they are sold in many box/hardware stores. Bait it with some peanut butter and you are all set.

Once you get it you have to figure out what you are going to do with it / what you are allowed to do with it.

[PapaBear]

Once you get it you have to figure out what you are going to do with it / what you are allowed to do with it.
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[opie's twisted balls]

http://blog.pennlive.com/corkyblake/2008/02/large_Caddyshack_Karl_Spackler.jpg

hire Carl....he's good with rodent elimination

[FrogSlayer]

just leave a hungry house cat in your attic for about 24 hrs.

[Coach]

Get a trap..

[keithy_19]

just leave a hungry house cat in your attic for about 24 hrs.

I have a cat, but she's fat and evil. I'm afraid they'll become friends, rather than tear into each other.

[sr71blackbird]

Place soiled cat litter in the attic, and the rodents will believe there is a cat residing there and vacate.

[Charlie_Don't_Surf]

These should help, if not then you have a bigger problem.

http://2db.free.fr/images/grenade_mk2/grenade.jpg