How much control do we have over the time of our death?

[Coach]

Dear Dr Steve..
How long can someone hold on to life from sheer willpower? You know the type, those people that should be dead on paper, but defy the odds and continue to exist.....And does a positive attitude seem to work better than say just plain old meanness and stubborness?

[Dr Steve]

Dear Dr Steve..
How long can someone hold on to life from sheer willpower? You know the type, those people that should be dead on paper, but defy the odds and continue to exist.....And does a positive attitude seem to work better than say just plain old meanness and stubborness?


You'd be amazed. We seem to have a measure of control over the exact time of our passing...not always, and it can't be delayed forever, but I see things like this all the time:

1) Mrs X hasn't seen her son in 20 years. She is dying but somehow holds on until her son shows up. Soon after his arrival she passes away.

2) Mr Z is ornery and crotchety...he lives months longer than his prognosis just on sheer cussedness.

3) Ms Y is in denial. She lives months longer than her prognosis would normally allow. On Tuesday she transitions to accepting her disease is terminal and on Friday she is gone.

Now, I could come up with an alternate explanation for ALL of these scenarios that doesn't imply that we have a little bit of control over the time and manner of our passing, but having done this for 20 years it certainly appears that we do, to some small degree.

[jauble]

Doc not sure how many of these you have seen, but when my grandmother was fighting bone and other various cancers when she accepted her death she was able to get up and walk around to say goodbye to my mother and uncle after being bedridden for months. Then she died. It was very cool as far as familial loss goes.

[Dr Steve]

Doc not sure how many of these you have seen, but when my grandmother was fighting bone and other various cancers when she accepted her death she was able to get up and walk around to say goodbye to my mother and uncle after being bedridden for months. Then she died. It was very cool as far as familial loss goes.

I see that a lot, actually. People will be totally unresponsive, only to wake up and interact with their family just before they die. It's as if they "came back" just long enough to say goodbye.

It's all a mystery.

[Coach]

You'd be amazed. We seem to have a measure of control over the exact time of our passing...not always, and it can't be delayed forever, but I see things like this all the time:

1) Mrs X hasn't seen her son in 20 years. She is dying but somehow holds on until her son shows up. Soon after his arrival she passes away.

2) Mr Z is ornery and crotchety...he lives months longer than his prognosis just on sheer cussedness.

3) Ms Y is in denial. She lives months longer than her prognosis would normally allow. On Tuesday she transitions to accepting her disease is terminal and on Friday she is gone.

Now, I could come up with an alternate explanation for ALL of these scenarios that doesn't imply that we have a little bit of control over the time and manner of our passing, but having done this for 20 years it certainly appears that we do, to some small degree.Yeah, I've seen that, in bunches..I'm talking also about those people really fucked up in an accident or shooting or whathave you that SHOULD die..yet somehow amaze doctors and pull through.

[Dr Steve]

Yeah, I've seen that, in bunches..I'm talking also about those people really fucked up in an accident or shooting or whathave you that SHOULD die..yet somehow amaze doctors and pull through.

ah, ok, that's luck or grace of God, really. I've seen people with a huge will to live who just were too messed up in an accident to recover.

Individually, it's up for grabs, though...there is a huge variability in people's ability to heal and survive trauma. How would we know if there was a subset of humans who never age and never die if they didn't reveal themselves to us? :smile: