Alzheimer's sucks

[PapaBear]

Anyone who has been around it already knows this. I just wanted to say it. I haven't completely lost Mom yet, but I still miss her. At present, she's at the stage where she's somewhere around 50% herself. But it's getting worse. Please feel free to share your experiences.

[keithy_19]

First off, I'm really sorry you and your family have to go through this.

My grandfather had alzheimers. When I was born he was already pretty much gone, so I never really knew him.

I'll be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers, PapaBear.

[spoon]

Yah man sorry to hear PB. Good luck and I hope you guys have a lot of good days together and it really slow down. That stuff is never easy and hopefully we'll make some huge gains in treatment soon.

[StanUpshaw]

My dad's mom was lost to dementia.

I vividly remember the day we drove up to take her car away. It was like a scene out of a Bergman film. I was watching from down the hall when my dad took the keys. She started to cry and my dad went and hugged her. She turned away and went into another room. They were in there for 30 seconds, but it seemed like an hour. I heard the keys hit the floor. My dad came out and we went back home.

The next time I saw her was a month later at the service.

[Snacks]

sorry to hear about your mom. I have never known anyone with it but I cant believe they cant create a drug to slow it down?

I hate to get political but maybe if Reagan didnt stop funding back in the 80's maybe we would be in a better place for this disease. Then again after he started to suffer from the disease he and his frail wife became very interested in the govt spending money to help find a cure!

Be happy for what is still there and maybe with any luck you will have a lot of good times left!

[spoon]

sorry to hear about your mom. I have never known anyone with it but I cant believe they cant create a drug to slow it down?

I hate to get political but maybe if Reagan didnt stop funding back in the 80's maybe we would be in a better place for this disease. Then again after he started to suffer from the disease he and his frail wife became very interested in the govt spending money to help find a cure!

Be happy for what is still there and maybe with any luck you will have a lot of good times left!

Reagen put a stop to a lot of good, progressive ideas when put in office. In short, fuck Reagan.

[hanso]

Reagen put a stop to a lot of good, progressive ideas when put in office. In short, fuck Reagan.

And Bush with stem cell which still hasn't restarted. Ditto.

Sorry to hear this PB I'm in the same boat.

[PapaBear]

My dad's mom was lost to dementia.

I vividly remember the day we drove up to take her car away. It was like a scene out of a Bergman film. I was watching from down the hall when my dad took the keys. She started to cry and my dad went and hugged her. She turned away and went into another room. They were in there for 30 seconds, but it seemed like an hour. I heard the keys hit the floor. My dad came out and we went back home.

The next time I saw her was a month later at the service.
Though I personally knew for years, that she was losing it (and I could see that the rest of my family knew it, but wouldn't accept it) your experience reflects what happened to my mother this past year.

She failed to pass a memory test at a routine doctor's visit. In the end, she lost her driver's license. I knew she really needed this to happen. Mom has ALWAYS been a very independent "free spirit" kind of person. Just ask Whistlepig. But I knew it was time for her to lose her ability to drive. It was just becoming too dangerous. The incidents of her getting lost, were just coming way too often. But it hurt to see how angry she became, when they took her freedom away.

I know her anger is part of the disease. I've accepted that. But it doesn't make it any easier knowing that. Because she doesn't understand it herself. And there will never be a way to explain it to her. My oldest sister is the one her takes her to her doctors appointments. Sis is a SAINT! But, when the doc explained how bad things were, and how she needed someone to be with her 24/7, she actually started yelling at Sis in front of the doc... Blaming her for everything.

Fuck.

[StanUpshaw]

I wish I had some advice for you. But I don't.

I was never that close with my grandma, and as she got worse, I only avoided interacting with her because it made me uncomfortable. I feel shitty whenever I think about it, and I feel like I wasn't there for my dad either. I can hardly imagine if it was one of my parents.

[A.J.]

My grandmother has the onset of it. I knew it was for real when I went up there this summer to see her and she asked my mother who I was.

[Misteriosa]

when i went to PR last christmas (2009), i was warned that my great aunt was beginning to show onset on alzheimers. however, she was refusing to take her medications. she is from that school of thought where you didnt go to the doctor unless you were dying (she walked on a broken foot for a month without telling anyone)

it progressed with a frightening pace from mother's day 2009 to that xmas. none of us were prepared for that. she told us the same stories every day, multiple times a day. she would forget when she took her showers and would ask what happened to her house (thats a story for another thread) and her husband (his death is connected to the loss of the house). she remembered who i was, but couldnt remember my younger sister.

she seemed resentful and angry at my grandmother (as they were living together in my grandmother's home) though she never said why. in the next moment, she was the advenurous and fun loving lady we used to know. then soon after, she was addressing me as if i were her daughter and telling me to go feed the chickens and get the goats together for milking (she used to have animals in her yard and would sell the goats milk to the neighbors)

she's twice a widow and has 8 children, 2 of which she's outlived. her home (that she owned outright) was stolen out from under her by her last husband and given to his chldren from another marriage. as often as she is refusing her medications, sometimes i think she just wants to forget.

[Furtherman]

My grandmother might have had it, although I don't think she was offically diagnosed. Her memory would fade in and out and she was sometimes hard to understand. Every once in a while when I visited her, there would be these great moments of clarity and she would speak to me as if nothing was wrong and she'd even laugh.

I can only tell you to live for her and those moments. Sorry you have to go through this.

[newport king]

lost my grandfather in may to this. the anger was the worst. he actually got physical with my grandmother a few times not knowing what he was doing. the last couple days were the worst. he'd sit in his hospital bed shaking, not opening his eyes completely incoherent. finally when he'd fall asleep he'd stop. i think everyone in the room was hoping that he was gone so he didnt have to suffer anymore.

not trying to be a downer but that was my story. have patience and hope for the best.

[King Hippos Bandaid]

sorry PB... I can relate... my both of Grandmothers had Altzheimers and from age 12 -30.. they had no idea who I was ... It is very rough, but just both of their presence made my familes ...

I remember when it was on set to altzheimers to dementia .... my Grandma on my dads side lived for 20 years and made it to 89... she was a fighter...

[KnoxHarrington]

I lost both my grandmother and my mother to Alzheimer's. It's brutal; they just slip away from you. My mom thought I was actually my uncle (who was dead before I was born), and had no idea who my sister was, so it was doubly hard on her.

I hope that if it happens to me, my family is kind enough to me to put a bullet in my brain when it's obvious I'm gone.

[Snacks]

I dont know much about the disease. Can someone explain to me how you die from it? Obviously we all know that it effects memory but what does it do to your body that is can cause death?

[newport king]

short answer is your brain isn't just responsible for memory. it's also responsible for motor skills and body function etc. once your brain shuts down it leaves you susceptible to things like stroke, heart failure, pneumonia etc. i think those things are usually what alzheimer's patients go from.

[hanso]

lost my grandfather in may to this. the anger was the worst. he actually got physical with my grandmother a few times not knowing what he was doing. the last couple days were the worst. he'd sit in his hospital bed shaking, not opening his eyes completely incoherent. finally when he'd fall asleep he'd stop. i think everyone in the room was hoping that he was gone so he didnt have to suffer anymore.

not trying to be a downer but that was my story. have patience and hope for the best.

Sorry for your loss.

[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

I don't have any experience with Alzheimers so I don't have much practical advice.

You say she's 50% of who she is. Try to enjoy the 50% that is still her. I know that's not easy since you can't predict what will happen day-to-day, but, if she's having an "herself" day then maybe ask her about some fond memories she'd like to share. Maybe go through old photo albums.

My dad sat me down four months before he died of cancer. He told me all sorts of family history and shared things about him and my mom I never knew. Although he had his mental faculties at the end, he just gave up and didn't talk at all. I am SO happy I had that long talk with him. It's something I'll always treasure.

Stay strong Paul.

[benjamin]

I'm sorry for everyone affected by this disease.

I'm beginning to suspect my mother may potentially have the early signs of alzheimers.

She forgets conversations consistently. She forgets the beginning of conversations half way through. She almost always talks about the past and has real trouble keeping up with the present. She is confused by some mundane tasks and isn't interested in being responsible for much anymore. She plays the victim all the time when it isnt warranted. She relies exclusively on me to do everything - not that big a deal.

She is just not herself and it's just weird.

Also she has aged about 30 years in the last 7. She is on hardcore narcotics for pain, so it's hard too know what is causing this.

[PapaBear]

Things got really bad after I started this thread. Mom hadn't been eating for several days. She got so weak, we had to take her to the ER. The Alzheimer's wasn't letting her body know it was hungry. Her dementia was progressing rapidly. And to make things worse, her kidneys were on the verge of complete failure. The first several days she was there, the doctor really didn't think she'd ever leave the hospital alive.

Things eventually started getting better. As they re hydrated her, and pumped some nutrition into her, her dementia started backing off quite a bit. Her kidneys finally got to a point where they decided she didn't need dialysis. She's looking better every day.

Bottom line is, when she's finally able to leave the hospital (she's been there for almost two weeks) she has to go to a nursing home with physical rehab facilities for at least 20 days. The nurses have been ordered to ALWAYS say rehab center, and NOT nursing home around her. If she thought she was being "committed" (as she puts it) to a nursing home, she'd lose all hope and want to die. If she's successful with the rehab, she will get to move back into her own home, with one of my sisters living there with her. The home repairs are almost done.

Funny story... My brother told me, when he visited her tonight, Mom introduced him to one of the nurses as being in charge of The Bare Naked Ladies.

[jennysmurf]

I'm sorry things got so bad so quickly. Maybe she's on a little turnaround for the better. We have to use the term "rehab center" with my grandmother too. She was tickled to go, where before she said she'd die before she went into a nursing home. Funny how just changing the name works on the psyche.

[Justice4all]

Things got really bad after I started this thread. Mom hadn't been eating for several days. She got so weak, we had to take her to the ER. The Alzheimer's wasn't letting her body know it was hungry. Her dementia was progressing rapidly. And to make things worse, her kidneys were on the verge of complete failure. The first several days she was there, the doctor really didn't think she'd ever leave the hospital alive.

Things eventually started getting better. As they re hydrated her, and pumped some nutrition into her, her dementia started backing off quite a bit. Her kidneys finally got to a point where they decided she didn't need dialysis. She's looking better every day.

Bottom line is, when she's finally able to leave the hospital (she's been there for almost two weeks) she has to go to a nursing home with physical rehab facilities for at least 20 days. The nurses have been ordered to ALWAYS say rehab center, and NOT nursing home around her. If she thought she was being "committed" (as she puts it) to a nursing home, she'd lose all hope and want to die. If she's successful with the rehab, she will get to move back into her own home, with one of my sisters living there with her. The home repairs are almost done.

Funny story... My brother told me, when he visited her tonight, Mom introduced him to one of the nurses as being in charge of The Bare Naked Ladies.

I'm sorry to hear man. Although that story seems to be one you and your family can share with laughter for many years. Which is a good thing.

It hurt me when I would walk into my grandmothers room and she wouldn't even know who I was anymore. Or who my parents were. Or my Uncles. (you get the idea) so I can't even begin to know what you are going thru being it's your mom.
I hope you and her don't have to suffer for long and will hope for the best for you and your family.

Good luck budday.

[Death Metal Moe]

It's an awful disease. My grandfather had it, it's just the worst. Now at my job I see it a lot too.

[KingModem]

Good luck man. In my mind, Alzheimers and dementia are the most difficult diseases to deal with because not only is it physically taxing, but emotionally devastating.

Keep it in prospective, and maintain your distance when you need it.

[PapaBear]

Mom took another turn for the worse. She has an intestinal infection. Blood isn't getting to the intestines, and the doctor fears gangrene may set in. She's getting surgery within the hour. They may have to remove part of her intestines, or maybe even her colon.

[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

I'm so sorry to hear this, Paul. You and your family are in my prayers.

[WhistlePig]

Oh I'm so sorry to hear this Paul!! I haven't been on here in a while and had no idea. This makes me so sad. I loved working with your mom, she was always so funny and sweet. My heart is breaking for you. I hope she pulls through ok!!! Let me know if there is anything I can do for you. :sad:

[PapaBear]

Oh I'm so sorry to hear this Paul!! I haven't been on here in a while and had no idea. This makes me so sad. I loved working with your mom, she was always so funny and sweet. My heart is breaking for you. I hope she pulls through ok!!! Let me know if there is anything I can do for you. :sad:
I'm glad you got to hear about her, since you actually know her. I used to love hearing stories from her about the girl with the crazy punk hair.

[WhistlePig]

I'm glad you got to hear about her, since you actually know her. I used to love hearing stories from her about the girl with the crazy punk hair.

That's what made her so cool--a lot of the older operators didn't like me because of the way I looked but she was always friendly regardless. And such a great sense of humor! I see where you got yours!

[PapaBear]

My mother died yesterday. When it finally hits me that she really is gone, I'm going to miss her even more, than when her memory started failing. Alzheimer's truly does suck.

1931-2010

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y229/snowmaninva66/Untitled-0008Medium.jpg

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y229/snowmaninva66/ImageB0456copyMedium.jpg

[Snacks]

Sorry for your loss PB! I only hope she didnt suffer and you were able to spend as much time with her as possible! I dont think you ever get over your parents death especially when you are as close as you were with your mom! Stay strong for your kids and the family and if you need to vent or talk you know everyone here will listen!

[A.J.]

Oh shit, I'm so sorry PB. If there's any silver lining, it's that she's at peace.

[Justice4all]

My mother died yesterday. When it finally hits me that she really is gone, I'm going to miss her even more, than when her memory started failing. Alzheimer's truly does suck.

1931-2010

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y229/snowmaninva66/Untitled-0008Medium.jpg

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y229/snowmaninva66/ImageB0456copyMedium.jpg

Thoughts and prayers Papa. I am sorry to hear about this, like AJ said...she's at peace now.

[Judge Smails]

I'm very sorry for your loss.

[RoseBlood]

I'm so sorry for your loss PB. You & your family are in my thoughts. You can always come here if you want to vent. When youre up to it, remember her fondly and talk about her. Keep her memory alive, we want to know what kind of person she was to you.

[Misteriosa]

my deepest sympathies to you and your family, papabear.

i dont have any comforting or sage words of wisdom. all i can say is that im so sorry.

[midwestjeff]

Sorry Papa.
She looks like a great woman.

[jennysmurf]

Aw, sweet Papabear, I'm so sorry. Seeing her pictures made a hollow place in my chest, and I didn't even know her. So, sorry.

[WhistlePig]

My heart aches for you, Paul. She was a wonderful woman. My thoughts are with you and your family. Please let me know if I can help you in any way. :sad:

[sailor]

Sorry for your loss, papa.

[PapaBear]

Thank you very much, everyone. She definitely was a wonderful person (Just ask Whistlepig). And she did go out without suffering. That was my main concern at this point.

[WhistlePig]

Thank you very much, everyone. She definitely was a wonderful person (Just ask Whistlepig). And she did go out without suffering. That was my main concern at this point.

Thank goodness she didn't suffer! I was blessed to have known her. You were lucky to have her as a mom, and she was lucky to have you as a son!

[keithy_19]

I'm really sorry for your loss PB. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

[spoon]

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[Melrapuo]

Sorry for your loss PB. Alzheimer's is something terrible to witness and have to go through. Hang in there, bud. It's gonna be rough now, but at least you know she doesn't have to suffer anymore. Best wishes to ya.

[The Urge]

Sorry for your loss. My grandfather passed away from Alzheimers 3 years ago... it is a horrible thing to watch someone go through.

[WampusCrandle]

hey budday, I'm really sorry to hear about your mother. Hopefully, you can look at the good times that she brought you during this holiday season. take care.

[Kris10]

I'm so sorry to hear about the passing of your mom, PB.

[Jughead]

Papa ..My first time here in about 4 months .....Im so sorry to get this news ...wish I could say something that would help .......You are a good person and I'm positive she was even better...Jug

[PapaBear]

Thanks, folks. I was pretty torn up for a while, but I immediately started feeling better after the funeral. I guess that "closure" thing can be very real.