EMERGENCY

[Tensor]

Can anyone out there help me? I am stumped. My girlfriend, who's 22, is unable to have an orgasm. (SHE'S NEVER HAD ONE, so i'm not a fag and i don't suck in bed) We have tried everything for the past 8 months and I have no idea what else to do.

We could be porking for 45 minutes and still nothing. Just as she gets really close, she starts thinking about it happening and she loses the feeling. I've tried everything, from weird positions to whipped cream to even anal, and she can't get off.

What should I do??? Does anyone have any suggestions???

-T

[Captain Rooster]

We have tried everything for the past 8 months and I have no idea what else to do.


Call GVAC.



<img src=http://www.ltrooster.homestead.com/files/roosterclawsanime.gif>

[The Jays]

.... suck on and play with her clit... get busy with da tongue...

<font color="blue" face="Trebuchet MS" size=-2> Fuck what you heard.</font>
<font color="blue" face="Trebuchet MS" size=-2> That cab has a dent in it.</font> [center]
[center]http://img.ranchoweb.com/images/jays777/die.jpg

[Tensor]

What the hell is GVAC?

[The Jays]

... if you don't know what GVAC is, then of course she's not having an orgasm....

<font color="blue" face="Trebuchet MS" size=-2> Fuck what you heard.</font>
<font color="blue" face="Trebuchet MS" size=-2> That cab has a dent in it.</font> [center]
[center]http://img.ranchoweb.com/images/jays777/die.jpg

[JerseyRich]

go to Google...type in Gvac...
and learn the ways of the Gvac!
<img src=http://www.gvac.ndtilda.co.uk/gvac.jpg>
<img src=http://home.ix.netcom.com/~camman/_uimages/2003Sig.gif>
I'd like an order of UH UH!With a side of some UH UH!

This message was edited by JerseyRich on 1-9-03 @ 12:39 AM

[EffMeBoobs]

GVAC is Gyrating Vagina and Clit. You need to purchase one and place it against her vagina and clit and she be full of spurting pleasure.

<img src=http://hometown.aol.com/lqqieee/effmenew.gif>

[Reephdweller]

Dude, if you don't know the powers of the GVAC that's your problem. That and the fact that you refer to it as "porkin" doesn't help either.



<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=go2osirus">

[LatinSpiceXoX]

no wonder his movements on stage made me wild..

'..Sex me so good I say BLAH BLAH BLAH..'
<IMG SRC="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/gpigking/myhomepage/ls1.gif?mtbrand=AOL_US">

My Current Mood: <a href="http://www.imood.com/query.cgi?email=latinspicexox@aol.com"><img src="http://www.imood.com/query.cgi?email=latinspicexox@aol.com&type=1&fg=330066&trans=1" alt="The current mood of latinspicexox@aol.com at www.imood.com" border="0"></a>

[Patches]

The first thing you need is my phone number. I can be there in an hour.

<IMG SRC=http://www.silentspic.com/images/sighost/patches3.jpg>
www.silentspic.com

Osama Bin Laden, you can kiss my royal Irish ass! And I live in Rockaway. And this is my face, bitch!
-FF Mike Moran

[Tensor]

"Porking" was her idea.

[Reephdweller]

"Porking" was her idea.

maybe she's the problem.

just to be safe though, look into the gvac as a back up plan.

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=go2osirus">

[Death Metal Moe]

Just listen to Tom Leykis.

He REALLY knows women!

<IMG SRC=http://unhallowed.com/sigs/seasonsbeatings.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!
<A HREF="http://www.pub21.ezboard.com/bonaarmy">JOIN THE O&A ARMY!!!</A>

[fluffernutter]

...and here I was hoping someone else shared my childhood liking of Engine 51 L.A. County Fire Department!

Every day striving for the
Pewter Helmet Award of
Shame.

[Tensor]

Tom Lickass is a douche bag. I'd rather watch flies fuck than listen to that fat shit stain on the radio.

Does anyone have any suggestions that does not involve machinery?

*Your mom's box*

[Crippler]

Just listen to Tom Leykis.

He REALLY knows women!

Now you're just being mean!

SigPic thanks to TenbatsuZen
http://pic5.picturetrail.com/VOL77/857148/1548180/18137301.jpg
...silent, but violent.
[center](Miles)[center]

[Death Metal Moe]

Tom Lickass is a douche bag. I'd rather watch flies fuck than listen to that fat shit stain on the radio.


I just gained a little respect for ya man so I'll actually give you my honest opinion.

I'd say stop making it so important.

I'm guess you're both talking about it A LOT before and after. This probably puts a lot of pressure on her to DO IT. So I'd say forget about it as much as possible. Just go for it and hope for the best.

All you can do is be there to do whatever she wants you to.

<IMG SRC=http://unhallowed.com/sigs/seasonsbeatings.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!
<A HREF="http://www.pub21.ezboard.com/bonaarmy">JOIN THE O&A ARMY!!!</A>

[blakjeezis]

We could be porking for 45 minutes and still nothing.
A whole 45 minutes?

<IMG SRC =http://czm.racknine.net/images/blakjeezis.jpg>
A dollah eighty-two!?!?! These mus' be Long Island Prices!
<marquee>White people are so scared of blakjeezis</marquee>

[Dewey]

As long as you're having a good time, that's all that's important.

Seriously, though, there are a number of books on the subject. I saw one entitled "Becoming Orgasmic". Women having difficulty achieving orgasm is a common problem.

Among the things I'm sure they'll recommend is getting her (and you) to relax. Don't make her having an orgasm the be all and end all of a successful sexual experience, or you'll make yourselves miserable. Find a book, read it together, have fun with it.

Here are some practical tips. Get her into a jacuzzi, or a shower with a pulsating stream, and direct warm water onto her clitoris. Toys are nothing to be ashamed of either. But I'd recommend that at some point you try placing a vibrator against her clitoris while you are inside her. This will help her to associate high states of sexual excitation with the sex act, and may prevent you from being replaced with a pocket rocket.

Above all, don't be frustrated with her. Imagine how tough it is for her; she doesn't need the pressure of a boyfriend whining and complaining that he can't get her off. It may not be an easy journey getting there. She may need to consult doctors to examine her physically, or psychologists, to see if anything else is blocking her. Maybe she never will be very orgasmic, but that doesn't mean that sex between you cannot be enjoyable and a fantastic vehicle to bring you closer together.

Good luck!

<IMG SRC="http://www.agw-werbeartikel.de/images/easy-rider.jpg"><br>"Still searching for America."

This message was edited by Dewey on 1-9-03 @ 3:02 AM

[ChrisTheCop]

fluffernutter, this is for you: <html> <img src="http://www.hyattsvillevfd.org/emergency/desoto1.jpg"> </html> <html> <img src="http://www.hyattsvillevfd.org/emergency/gage1.jpg"> </html> <html> <img src="http://www.hyattsvillevfd.org/emergency/brack1.jpg"> </html>

<img src="http://rfcop.50megs.com/images/dcpete_sigpic.gif">the views expressed by dcpete do not necessarily represent those of my employer.

[reeshy]

I can attest that the powers of GVAC have changed my life forever!!

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:w0UGlLXNy2IC:www.dougmacaulay.com/kingspud/photos/plynde.jpg>

[DreamWeaver]

All hail almighty GVAC, Master of the Clitoral Orgasm!!!!!

http://blakjeezis.homestead.com/files/ginani.gif

[fluffernutter]

fluffernutter, this is for you:


Again, Chris, thanks so much for that! Someone else remembers!

Come to think of it my mom made me get rid of all my KISS records when I was 10 because I was having dreams about fire and destruction. It COULDN'T have been because I was a fan of EMERGENCY! COULD IT!?!?!

Every day striving for the
Pewter Helmet Award of
Shame.

[TooCute]

Sorry bro, but you aren't
going to give her an
orgasm. Buy her a vibrator,
leave her to her own
devices, and when she's
actually HAD an orgasm,
then worry about trying to
make her have one.

Jeez, doesn't your girl read
Cosmo??


<img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/toocute2.gif>
ADF makes great sigpics!

[Evilpete]

ever tried a donkey punch?? may not get her off, but you'll get some stress off...

<img src="http://members.aol.com/evilpete66/images/sig2.jpg">

Making the ladies call me "daddy" one night at a time
<marquee> IM @ Evilpete66</marquee>

[JustJon]

I think she's lost that lovin' feeling.

<img src="http://www.chaoticconcepts.com/bans/rfjustjon6.jpg">

[CaptClown]

Chris you are the man!!

Director of the C.Y.A. Society.
Field Marshal of the K.I.S.S. Army

[Gvac]

I can help.

<img src=http://gvac.50megs.com/images/capsig.jpg>

[Jennitalia]

Maybe Figgy can give you some pointers. Tookie Munching 101

<IMG SRC="http://www.chaoticconcepts.com/bans/jensig.gif">

next time you want pussy, just look in the mirror, baby

[JerseyRich]

I can help.
The Gvac has spoken...
So let it be written...So let it be done.

<img src=http://home.ix.netcom.com/~camman/_uimages/2003Sig.gif>
I'd like an order of UH UH!With a side of some UH UH!

[A.J.]

...and here I was hoping someone else shared my childhood liking of Engine 51 L.A. County Fire Department!


The "Old School" is strong in this one. :)

<IMG SRC="http://www.silentspic.com/images/sighost/ajdcsig.jpg">

A Skidmark production.

[FatTony]

(SHE'S NEVER HAD ONE, so i'm not a fag and i don't suck in bed)

Sure thats what you think.

We could be porking for 45 minutes and still nothing.


WEll there's your first problem. What are you 12 years old? Porking? And you say she can't have an orgasm huh? And only 45 minutes?

Just as she gets really close, she starts thinking about it happening and she loses the feeling.


Maybe she realizes that you are fucking her and she loses the feeling.

<IMG SRC="http://hometown.aol.com/antandone/xpwsig.jpg" WIDTH=300 HEIGHT=100>

"They always win in the end."

[Justice4all]

Does anyone have any suggestions that does not involve machinery?

Well since you have already said you spent 45 min. "porking" her, maybe you should spent the 45 mins. next time on foreplay. Every woman is different. I prefer to "let me fingers do the walking" and also perform oral at the same time.
When your finger is inside her (two at MOST) make the "come here" gensture with it. You may feel as the tips of your fingers go from smooth to a almost slightly bumpy kind or sensation as it hits the top of her vagaina. That is the area of the G-spot. IF and when you find this area then start going down on her clit. Suck it lightly or hard, depending on her preference. See how she responds to you doing that for 30 mins or so. Of course you can also break it up by doing other things...but that may work. Hell it could not HURT.

<img src=http://home.ix.netcom.com/~camman/_uimages/Justice4All.gif>

Thank you JerseyRich!!!!!

[Captain Rooster]

Gvac is on the case. Get me a rain slicker, James. This one's going to be an event.



<img src=http://www.ltrooster.homestead.com/files/roosterclawsanime.gif>

This message was edited by LTRooster on 1-10-03 @ 11:43 AM

[reeshy]

Suck it lightly or hard, depending on her preference. See how she responds to you doing that for 30 mins or so.


Keep that up and I guarantee that you'll get lockjaw!!!!!!!

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:sY_z0o3yITcC:www.westernposterpage.co m/hondo4.jpg>

[Death Metal Moe]

Maybe she realizes that you are fucking her and she loses the feeling


That was COLD Fat Tony! Fucking ARCTIC!

Brrrrrrrrrr.

<IMG SRC=http://unhallowed.com/sigs/seasonsbeatings.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!
<A HREF="http://www.pub21.ezboard.com/bonaarmy">JOIN THE O&A ARMY!!!</A>

[ADF]

(SHE'S NEVER HAD ONE, so i'm not a fag and i don't suck in bed)


Just because she's never had an orgasm doesn't mean you don't suck in bed. Perhaps she's never had an orgasm AND you suck in bed.

<center><img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/adf14.gif>
Ce sachet d'emballage n'est pas un jouet.</center>

[HordeKing1]

If she's never been able to have an orgasm even via masturbation, it is doubtful that you'll be able to help her via conventional intercourse.

Orgasms come from the clitorus, so forget the 45 minute "porking" and give her some oral. Besides, contrary to what you may have "learned" from porno films, many women get uncomfortable after more than several minutes of penis/vaginal sex.

And she's certainly not going to have an orgasm from anal, or "whipped cream". (Sheesh). She needs direct clitoral stimulation.

A vibrator or two and time alone w/o pressure from you about orgasms, might be helpful.

Finally, it is possible that she has a medical or psychological condition causing her difficulty in orgasming.

On that topic, 45 minutes of actual sex w/o your orgasming? Are you on medication? Some can cause a diminshed orgasmic response, i.e. make it take a longer time to come.

Oh yes, try making love instead of "porking."

<img src="http://members.aol.com/rnfpantera/hking1">

[Evilpete]

On that topic, 45 minutes of actual sex w/o your orgasming? Are you on medication? Some can cause a diminshed orgasmic response, i.e. make it take a longer time to come.


I'd like to know what he's on, then when I go 45 mins, the chick has no reason to complain, other than it too big...

<img src="http://members.aol.com/evilpete66/images/sig2.jpg">

Making the ladies call me "daddy" one night at a time
<marquee> IM @ Evilpete66</marquee>