Is the notion of Romantic love a strength or a weakness?

[Justice4all]

I saw the movie Love, Actually (I thought it was good) and I was wondering....does anyone ever believe in the old fasioned style of romantic love? And if so..do you find it to be a weakness or a Strength? I have been on a few dates recently where the women seems to be VERY insecure with themselves and almost have no notion of romance. or if they did it was nothing like I have seen before. So I thought maybe the old style was a weakness and it is something that women (and men) do not want anymore. The old style where you believe that if you really love someone there is no problem you can't overcome together...ect.
So what say you board members....do you dismiss the notion or do you think it is still essential.

[DJEvelEd]

Old School Romantic Lover: "Sweetheart, thou art the most fairest.

Modern Psycho Bitch: "Just stick it in already and shutup dammit"

Old School Romantic Lover: "Oh my sweet darling, you giveth me great joy in my heart"

Modern Psycho Bitch: "Heart Schmart, just keep fuckin"

Old School Romantic Lover: "Ah my love, I can smell the sweet nectar of your loins"

Modern Psycho Bitch: "I just queefed you asshole, now hurry up before I assfart too"

Old School Romantic Lover: "All of your wonderful scents fill me with glee and gayness my love"

Modern Psycho Bitch: "OK! Get the fuck off me you fag!!!

Old School Romantic Lover: "Does thou haveth change of a Gold Deblume?"

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May 1000 Kamel Kocks With Krusty Kankers Konstantly Karess Your Kooze Kovered Kunt Korroding It With Kreamed Kum - (Old Arabic Blessing)

[Jennitalia]

guys who try to be overly romantic come across as being either fake, and/or that they're desperately trying too hard. and it's creepy too. but that's just my opinion.

<IMG SRC="http://www.chaoticconcepts.com/bans/jensig2.gif">

This message was edited by Jennitalia on 12-6-03 @ 10:42 AM

[Arienette]

the "old style" that you're advocating sounds incredibly naive to me. while i do believe in love and romance, i think people's experiences inform them as to how things work in reality. these girls you're discussing sound like they've probably been fucked over before and so they're afraid to let themselves be vulnerable... and i can certainly understand that.

as with all things, i think moderation is best. i think it's important to have some sense of innocence when it comes to love, and being able to trust someone else enough to let yourself be a little vulnerable with them. at the same time, i think it's both childish and foolish to believe that just because two people love each other, nothing can ever stop them. i used to think that when i was in high school, but life doesn't work that way. love and romance and all that are good, but it takes more than that to really make something work long term.

<center><img src="http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/aripenguin.gif" height=100 width=300</img><br>i scream for the sunlight or a car to take me anywhere<br>just get me past this dead and eternal snow</center>

[Katylina]

So is waiting in my boyfriend's bed with nothing but my bra, a g-string, heeled boots and a hat before he comes home from work count as romantic or just a bootie call?

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[mikeyboy]

as with all things, i think moderation is best. i think it's important to have some sense of innocence when it comes to love, and being able to trust someone else enough to let yourself be a little vulnerable with them. at the same time, i think it's both childish and foolish to believe that just because two people love each other, nothing can ever stop them. i used to think that when i was in high school, but life doesn't work that way. love and romance and all that are good, but it takes more than that to really make something work long term.


I couldn't agree with this more.



So is waiting in my boyfriend's bed with nothing but my bra, a g-string, heeled boots and a hat before he comes home from work count as romantic or just a bootie call?


a hat?

http://www.visionstreetwear.com/shuvit/shuvit_hat_trucker.jpg

http://www.jollygoodjokes.co.za/jgjstore/ski02.jpg

http://spacemonkeymafia.com/pictures/paperhat/paperhat4.jpg

http://www.easleys.com/hats/D-I/Fez_/fezF92.jpg

http://members.shaw.ca/andsewon/images/7850m-gc.jpg

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This message was edited by mikeyboy on 12-6-03 @ 11:53 AM

[high fly]

So is waiting in my boyfriend's bed with nothing but my bra, a g-string, heeled boots and a hat before he comes home from work count as romantic or just a bootie call?

Romantic.
A bootie call would be you meeting him at the door wearing knee pads and handing him a cold beer...

" and they ask me why I drink"

[Justice4all]

the "old style" that you're advocating sounds incredibly naive to me. while i do believe in love and romance, i think people's experiences inform them as to how things work in reality. these girls you're discussing sound like they've probably been fucked over before and so they're afraid to let themselves be vulnerable... and i can certainly understand that.

as with all things, i think moderation is best. i think it's important to have some sense of innocence when it comes to love, and being able to trust someone else enough to let yourself be a little vulnerable with them. at the same time, i think it's both childish and foolish to believe that just because two people love each other, nothing can ever stop them. i used to think that when i was in high school, but life doesn't work that way. love and romance and all that are good, but it takes more than that to really make something work long term.




I very much agree Ari.....things have to be done in moderation. You do not just immediately start loving someone right off the bat.
And yes it is childish to think that love conqours all, but it would be a nice thing to see it once in a while.
But yes...some of them have been screwed over alot. But I have too before and why is it that I am not as 'jaded' as some others.
But I have to asmit...I understand the desire to keep some darkness inside when you have been fucked over..to make you a little more cautious.

P.S. Kat???
So is waiting in my boyfriend's bed with nothing but my bra, a g-string, heeled boots and a hat before he comes home from work count as romantic or just a bootie call?
If it is your BOYFRIEND...romance....just some guy you are randomly dating? Bootie call


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Bowie, Md.: Berkeley, I'm so glad you're back!; I've really missed The Far Side all these years.

Berkeley Breathed: Yes, thank you, but I don't draw Far Side. I draw Calvin and Hobbes.

This message was edited by Justice4all on 12-6-03 @ 3:14 PM

[keithy_19]

I like to think I'm a romantic guy when I'm with girls. I mean, not overly romantic, but I am a gentlmen. I offered a girl my coat because she was cold. Now thats good of me, right?

http://members.aol.com/thetoddsterlsp/sigpics/keithbobeefy1.gif

One thing I've never said. I'm truly happy in my heart and in my head...

[Tall_James]

So is waiting in my boyfriend's bed with nothing but my bra, a g-string, heeled boots and a hat before he comes home from work count as romantic or just a bootie call?

It'd be more romantic if you also brought a cheese-steak sammich and a 6-pack into bed also. I'd love you forever if you'd do that.


<img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=tall_james">

[ChrisTheCop]

To believe in Romantic Love, you 1st must believe in love. I believe love exists in much the same way I believe no 2 snowflakes are the same; I've heard it, but I have yet to see it for myself. Romance, and Romantic Love however, are 2 different things. Romance is the act of bringing flowers, breakfasts in bed, etc..basically putting your love before all else. And it is in fact, just that--an act. Romantic Love, however, is "true" love, and as Justice4all says:

if you really love someone there is no problem you can't overcome together....
So, there are really 3 things here: Love Romance Romantic Love
They never all have to be present for a couple to be happy. You can be "in love" and not be romantic. You can certainly (as Ari and others point out) have romance without love. You can even (in theory) experience Romantic Love without Romance...(huh?!).
Ok, now I've confused myself. (sweet sweet Baileys).
To answer Tom's question more directly, Yes, I believe in Romantic Love. But it's rare, and certainly harder to fake than the other 2.


<img src="http://rfcop.50megs.com/images/jersey_rich-fluffernutter_sigpic.gif">jersenutter

[high fly]

It's not a strength or a weakness, so I didn't vote.

Done properly, romance is superb.

When it's fake, it's dis-gus-ting!

" and they ask me why I drink"

[Wormwood]

Chris is wise beyond his years.

<IMG SRC="http://www.photobucket.com/albums/0903/dfaz11779/30988f07.jpg">

Boston came around one night...

[CrazyClare]

love is a myth

<IMG SRC="http://www.osirusonline.com/crazyclare.gif">
either love me or leave me alone.

[CrazyClare]

get the papers, get the papers.

<IMG SRC="http://www.osirusonline.com/crazyclare.gif">
either love me or leave me alone.

This message was edited by CrazyClare on 12-7-03 @ 4:43 PM

[Tall_James]

love is a myth

no its not. and it will find you one day and knock you on your ass.

in a good way.


<img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=tall_james">

[ChrisTheCop]

love is a myth...a myth!

"Yeth???"
http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:SQCNgOV6bRIC:www.geocities.com/sethbh42/piggypic.jpg

<img src="http://rfcop.50megs.com/images/jersey_rich-fluffernutter_sigpic.gif">jersenutter

[high fly]

love is a myth



either love me or leave me alone

Now I'm confused.

" and they ask me why I drink"

[Death Metal Moe]

http://www.sick-boy.com/images/ai.gif

My love is real.........

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<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
WITH A BODY OF STONE, AND A MIND LIKE... GENIUSNESS!

[Death Metal Moe]

I hate the love in my heart.

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<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
WITH A BODY OF STONE, AND A MIND LIKE... GENIUSNESS!

[Melrapuo]

I think romantic love was a lot more stronger years and years ago, when life was simpler. Today, people have so much to do that, even when they do find love, they don't have enough time to celebrate it. They have so much other stuff to think about and get pissed at that they forget everything and long more for the past and how things were then rather then enjoy what they have now.

I dunno. That's what I'm guessin'.

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Somebody please help me with touching up my sigs so they don't look like shit.

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YANKEES FAN SINCE BIRTH!

[Wormwood]

I hate the love in my heart


brilliant.

<IMG SRC="http://www.photobucket.com/albums/0903/dfaz11779/30988f07.jpg">

Boston came around one night...

[CrazyClare]

did i ever claim to make sense?


<IMG SRC="http://www.osirusonline.com/crazyclare.gif">
either love me or leave me alone.

[FUNKMAN]

love is great but along with love there will always be some hurt...

and for the board pervs when i say 'hurt' i don't mean 'anal sex'...

<img src="http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/funkman.gif">

and when you're bad you die when you die

[Mike Teacher]

years and years ago, when life was simpler.


exactly the opposite, imho.

<IMG SRC="http://members.aol.com/miketeachr/newsig">

[Mike Teacher]

I saw this on a card once, and it was so beautiful...



Love Means Never Having To Say You're Sorry You Farted.


I can't add anything more...

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[DJEvelEd]

when i say 'hurt' i don't mean 'anal sex'..

You forgot these other hurtful things:

*Nipple Tweaking
*Wax Dripping
*Ass Whipping
*Burning
*Pinpricking
*Ass Hair Plucking
*Condom Snapping
*Pubic Hair In Your Throat
*Getting Shit On (hurts your pride)
*Salty Cum In Your Eye

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May 1000 Kamel Kocks With Krusty Kankers Konstantly Karess Your Kooze Kovered Kunt Korroding It With Kreamed Kum - (Old Arabic Blessing)

[Johnny Fontane]

Dilemma - if you're all romantic and then you get dumped, you feel like a total douche. On the other hand, if you're not romantic at all and then you get dumped, you feel like a douche.

The ladies had a nice little racket going on all these years. Even with the advent of porno, guys could always rationalize that those girls were abnormal.

But with the advent of shows like Sex and the City, let's just say guys are becoming more wary. A few years back I became infatutated with a bartender who worked at a place called Bazookas (same thing as Hooters). My father told me to stay away from her, unless I wanted to start lending her money to pay the rent, etc. That scared me straight.

Edit: My psychic abilities tell me I'm going to get slammed for this post.

http://www.grandinotizie.it/image/g/000/00040.jpg
"The principal benefit acting has afforded me is the money to pay for my psychoanalysis."

This message was edited by Johnny Fontane on 12-7-03 @ 6:42 PM

[Death Metal Moe]

love is a myth

no its not. and it will find you one day and knock you on your ass.

in a good way.


<img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=tall_james">



I like you Tall James, but this idea that True Love is out there for everyone is a horrible lie that kids are taught as early as they can understand Disney movies.

Some people never find anyone. Some people have several dead end relationships and settle with someone who they don't love just so they don't spend the end of their life alone. And some people just die.

Life is crule and unfair. But I'd rather spend my time in REALITY then fool myself into thinking "There's a woman for every man."

The idea of love is beautiful and I hope you all find it, but to think EVERYONE will is foolish.

Also, it's unhealthy to think you will find ALL your happiness in the arms of another person. Too needy. Then if that person leaves you, your whole world comes down.

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<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
WITH A BODY OF STONE, AND A MIND LIKE... GENIUSNESS!

[Bama]

Guys... there is a woman out there for you. Unfortunately she's fat and ugly.

Sorry.

http://www.ronfez.net/imagestorage/bamanation.jpg
YANKEES SUCK

[Reephdweller]

I'd say it depends on the people involved. I've had some relationships where it was very much about being very romantic, and others where it was just about being together at the same time. It's very interesting how some people approach love from others. With that said, I don't believe it is either.

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[Late2party]

Some people never find anyone. Some people have several dead end relationships and settle with someone who they don't love just so they don't spend the end of their life alone. And some people just die.

<snip>Also, it's unhealthy to think you will find ALL your happiness in the arms of another person. Too needy. Then if that person leaves you, your whole world comes down.

Aren't realists a bitch?

[Arienette]

Also, it's unhealthy to think you will find ALL your happiness in the arms of another person. Too needyi don't think anyone believes that you can find all your happiness by being with another person. there are always other things in life, and other things that are important. and it's neither healthy nor smart to be looking for someone to save you and fix everything. but having someone to share the good things with, and to comfort you during the bad things is a wonderful thing. being realistic is smart, but don't discount the possibility...

<center><img src="http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/aripenguin.gif" height=100 width=300</img><br>i scream for the sunlight or a car to take me anywhere<br>just get me past this dead and eternal snow</center>

[Death Metal Moe]

Well, my love for BACON will never die, until it kills me.

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<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
WITH A BODY OF STONE, AND A MIND LIKE... GENIUSNESS!

[Bill From Yorktown]

Also, it's unhealthy to think you will find ALL your happiness in the arms of another person. Too needyi don't think anyone believes that you can find all your happiness by being with another person. there are always other things in life, and other things that are important. and it's neither healthy nor smart to be looking for someone to save you and fix everything. but having someone to share the good things with, and to comfort you during the bad things is a wonderful thing. being realistic is smart, but don't discount the possibility...

<center><img src="http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/aripenguin.gif" height=100 width=300</img><br>i scream for the sunlight or a car to take me anywhere<br>just get me past this dead and eternal snow</center>

YES! Thanks for posting that I was going to say something similar. Too many people fall into 1 of 2 traps
1 - another person is needed to fix all my problems
2 - you can only be happy yourself

neither are correct. The first one makes us think someone else will take care of all our problems (some of which only we can fix) so we end up being unhappy when they can't. The second one is also a big problem - it doesnt mean "be happy in yourself" which is the correct idea, but too many people take it to mean "you have to be able to be alone an happy" - WRONG. We are by nature social creatures so by and large none of us are happy all the time when alone. We have this social need to be with other people. That part is lost on a lot of people going through rough times when someone tells them "you need to be happy on your own"



<IMG SRC="http://hometown.aol.com/billb914/sigpic.gif">

[Death Metal Moe]

Hey I never said that companionship was a bad thing. Everyone needs it and with everything in life, it has it's ups and downs. If the ups outweight the downs, then it's good for you.

I just said the idea that there's a perfect, true love out there just waiting for each of us is pure bullshit. The rest was just a side note.

<IMG SRC=http://unhallowed.com/sigs/leavessig.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
WITH A BODY OF STONE, AND A MIND LIKE... GENIUSNESS!

[Justice4all]

[/quote]


I like you Tall James, but this idea that True Love is out there for everyone is a horrible lie that kids are taught as early as they can understand Disney movies.

Some people never find anyone. Some people have several dead end relationships and settle with someone who they don't love just so they don't spend the end of their life alone. And some people just die.

Life is crule and unfair. But I'd rather spend my time in REALITY then fool myself into thinking "There's a woman for every man."

The idea of love is beautiful and I hope you all find it, but to think EVERYONE will is foolish.

Also, it's unhealthy to think you will find ALL your happiness in the arms of another person. Too needy. Then if that person leaves you, your whole world comes down.

[/quote]

Moe you bring up a few good points. but it sounds like you are talking like you lost all hope.
Ari and Bill both made good counterpoints about having someone there to enjoy the good times and comfort in the bad times.
Having someone there who will fix all your problems is a relationship based on need. That is not healthy, nor is one that is based on control.
I was in a very bad marrige and relationship because I based it on need. Yes my life came crashing down when she left, but hindsight has shown me a different view. I not only survived but thrived after the end. (With the help of family and friends of course)
Life IS cruel and sometimes unfair but only if you make it that way. There are people who are very content on being alone, and there are others who (like myself) would like a companion. Everyone is different. But for those who do want a companion I honestly do believe there is someone for everyone.


<img src=http://home.ix.netcom.com/~camman/_uimages/Justice4All.gif>
Bowie, Md.: Berkeley, I'm so glad you're back!; I've really missed The Far Side all these years.

Berkeley Breathed: Yes, thank you, but I don't draw Far Side. I draw Calvin and Hobbes.

[curtoid]

I think all consuming, romatic, "die-4-U" kind of love is something best left for "the young." Not that old farts can't fall in love, it's just never the same as that first time (or the first 10 times) you fall in love. That love is pretty special and very rare, and I think the older you get, the less likely you are to believe that you can ever recapture it again - so you won't.

That's why, people who marry their high school, or college sweet hearts, are very lucky, because odds are that kind of love they (at one time) more than likely shared.

I offered a girl my coat because she was cold. Now thats good of me, right?

Yes it is.

Guys... there is a woman out there for you. Unfortunately she's fat and ugly.

So damn true it's not even funny.

love is a myth

I thought love was a battlefield?

[KOP]

[high fly]

I'm romantic.

Today I bought my right hand a single rose as a "thank you" and to express my love...




" and they ask me why I drink"

[Death Metal Moe]

Moe you bring up a few good points. but it sounds like you are talking like you lost all hope.


Well, Hope Floats.

So it's hard to have any lying in the bottom of the pool.

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<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
WITH A BODY OF STONE, AND A MIND LIKE... GENIUSNESS!

[EndangeredFeces]

I love to poop.

<IMG SRC=http://unhallowed.com/sigs/EFanimated.gif>
I am a dirty liar

[swiss miss]

you know, im with moe in this one. i think love is something that sounds great, works in the movies etc... but the truth is, some people will just end up alone. and the notion that there is a "one true love" or a "soul mate" is also bullshit, ive come to the conclusion that everyone has bullshit u will have to deal with...now do you end up with the guy with self esteem issues? or the guy who is obsessed? etc.....i think you can learn to like someone a great deal, but there is no way in hell that this earth has some kind of PLAN for us. people find each other, or they dont.


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center]

**tha

[JohnnyCash]

You just gotta find the right person. Then the notion of romantic love can actually be clear.

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Thanks to Reefdwella for the great Sig Pic.