Another Tale of Embarrassment

[PanterA]

As you guys can see I use this forum as my blog. I never really understood why people keep blogs. I now find it to be a good outlet for my acts of stupidity.

So, my whole life I've found ways to screw up everything good that happens to me. It's just the way things are for me. I've come to accept this flaw and learned to take the funny out of these stories and use them to entertain people and even myself. Sometimes its all I've got to keep me from leaping off a bridge. (That's not true I wouldn't kill myself)

Now on to the reason for the thread. Today we had a small party at work. They got bagels and coffee for us to have on our morning break. Now the regular mailmen get tips from their customers and make anywhere from $900 to $3,000 on tips alone. So they started a collection among themselves and gave out Christmas cards with cash to the other carriers that don't have their own routes, like me. So, I get a card and it has $75 in it. That's really nice considering that i only been at this station for 4 months. Now on the card I read "From the carriers. Routes 10 & 11" So I thought hey my part of the collection must have came from routes 10 & 11...why don't I go and say thank you. Good idea right? So I go up to the guy on route 10 and say "Thank you very much for the card and the tip. That was really nice of you." The guy turns to me and says "What card? What tip?" I tried to explain to him that I got the card and was thanking him for it. He insists that he has no idea what I'm talking about. So I walk away confused and go back to my desk and re-read the card. What I didn't see before was that the card actually read "From the carriers EXCEPT routes 10 & 11". Right away I knew I started something bad. Just then the guy that gave out the cards comes over to me and is like, "You know that that's from all the carriers, EXCEPT routes 10 & 11?" I told him I read it wrong and apologized but the damage was done. All day the guys have been arguing about putting something like that on the cards. Also some of them have been coming up to me thanking me for various things like the coffee, the rubber bands, or the mail. Stuff like that to make fun of me thanking that guy for no reason. Yeah that was funny but it's really uncomfortable to see this guy. He's pretty pissed that they would point out that he didnt give to the collection, and thinks that they all put me up to saying thank you to him to like embarrass him.

UGH, I always find a way to ruin a good thing. It never fails.

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God Bless
<b>Dimebag Darryl Abbott
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[grlNIN]

That's funny.

You shouldn't be the one to feel uncomfortable, you weren't the one to shaft people on a tip just because they don't have their own route.

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[SatCam]

This whole postal thing isn't going well for you

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[sr71blackbird]

Dont worry too much about it, they will be thinking more about what they are going to spend their money on than what you said, and even so, you have a hotty girl friend regardless, so fuck 'em! ;-)

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[Bulldogcakes]

Thanks for the story, Pantera. (Just busting yer balls)

Have a Merry Christmas!



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[Gmann]

Ya know...whenever Im having a shitty day, something stupid happens to me....I read the board and find a Bobby thread....and suddenly I feel so much better about my life.

Thanks Bobby.

[JPMNICK]

dude your stories are the greatest. that one is funny on so many levels, but even funnier because it happened to you

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[PanterA]

I'm glad the hell that is my life has brought a moment of fun in yours.

I would like to say the rest of the day went well for me, but....

I went to the gym today and locked my stuff up. long story short, I leave the gym about an hour or so later. Go to get a sandwich and find out that someone stole $200 from my locker!

WTF!?!

God, am I your court jester? Am I here to amuse you? Am I a clown to you? Couldnt you give me the rest of the day off? Why God....why?

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God Bless
<b>Dimebag Darryl Abbott
1966 - 2004</b></center><font color=white>

[Gmann]

Something similar happened to me like 3 yrs ago. I was leaving the bar, I was sober as hell cause I had a cold...only reason I went out was cause it was a friends b-day....got a cab, got home, out of the corner of my eye as I was getting out of the cab I spotted some paper, but thought it was junk. Woke up the next day....checked my wallet....lost 2 $100 bills. Dropped em in the cab.

It still haunts me to this day.

[ChickenHawk]

Can you just start wearing a sign around on your back that says "Kick me"?

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[Bulldogcakes]

I went to the gym today and locked my stuff up. long story short, I leave the gym about an hour or so later. Go to get a sandwich and find out that someone stole $200 from my locker!


Maybe it was Route drivers 1-9 getting their money back, plus a loan shark interest rate.


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[Bulldogcakes]

Something similar happened to me like 3 yrs ago. I was leaving the bar, I was sober as hell cause I had a cold...only reason I went out was cause it was a friends b-day....got a cab, got home, out of the corner of my eye as I was getting out of the cab I spotted some paper, but thought it was junk. Woke up the next day....checked my wallet....lost 2 $100 bills. Dropped em in the cab.

It still haunts me to this day


Wow, isn't that funny. I got in a cab about three years ago and found 2 $100 bills! Still remember it as one of the best days of my life!
Went right out and spent it on crack and cheap hookers.
Had a few bucks leftover so I donated it to Yasser Arafat.



Actually I usually find money when it snows. People wearing gloves, clumsy I guess. Found $100 bills the last two snowstorms.









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[sr71blackbird]

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If you start hearing dogs talking to you, we are all in trouble!!

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[Doogie]

I understand why ya feel uncomfortable, but I wouldnt worry about it. The guy is the dick for not chipping in on the lil gift for you. He should remember what it was like to be a new guy in the office, instead he is nothing but a Murray Miser not sharing any money with ya. Get him a present of dog poop all wrapped up nicely.

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[mikeyboy]

I can't hold my tongue anymore. This didn't happen. None of it did. He didn't get hit with a trash can by God. He didn't lose his cell phone retrieiving a dollar. He didn't nearly get hit by a car while walking to the gas station for soda. He didn't get that "just teabagged" feeling from delivering the mail. He didn't slip on any fruits or vegetables. His name isn't even Bobby. It's Carlton Lasky, and he's a rich, gay Hollywood sitcom writer trying to connect to the common man. You're all a part of one of the biggest covert focus groups ever, created to fine tune Carlton's newest project. Face it, you've all been used as pawns for a media conglomerate.

On the upside, coming soon on Sunday nights, you can watch "Bobby, the Unlucky Mailman" as a mid-season replacement on Fox, and know that you helped make it work.

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[Iamnotatool]

Hey Carlton, you're writing a great show.

Can't wait to watch.

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Please don't hold my huge nutbag against me, or I'll hold it against you that you have flapjack tits

[Doogie]

Face it, you've all been used as pawns for a media conglomerate.


If it isnt real it is some pretty funny shit then. One way or another it is entertaining the masses here.

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[Freebird]

It's better than just about everything on television now...and it would make one heck of great movie!!

-----------------------------
Now I'm starving

I'm about to turn it up a notch!

[sr71blackbird]

You are gainfully employed by the US Goverment in a secure position that really cant be outsourced, and you date an extremely attractive, intelligent girl who helps those less fortunate. You overcame a cycle of addiction of a substance that was controling your life.
You won the lottery my friend!

Whatever you lost has been given back to you ten fold! The tire fell off your car and you didnt skid out of control and crash. You survived an aerial assualt of flying garbace cans and wayward boot scrapers and anthrax laced envelopes. Dont dicount all that you have working in your favor and concentrate instead on these other events as an indication of bad luck befalling you. Your a lucky guy and you do have your blessings!


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[CYYYFYYY]

I was almost a mailman but in the driving test I crashed into a tree and I got yelled at and flunked the test

Everyone Loves CYYYFYYY
I am just a Simple jewish Boy
from the Lower east Side
I am the CYYYFYYY

[Reephdweller]

You are gainfully employed by the US Goverment in a secure position that really cant be outsourced, and you date an extremely attractive, intelligent girl who helps those less fortunate. You overcame a cycle of addiction of a substance that was controling your life.
You won the lottery my friend!

Whatever you lost has been given back to you ten fold! The tire fell off your car and you didnt skid out of control and crash. You survived an aerial assualt of flying garbace cans and wayward boot scrapers and anthrax laced envelopes. Dont dicount all that you have working in your favor and concentrate instead on these other events as an indication of bad luck befalling you. Your a lucky guy and you do have your blessings!


Seeeeeee Bobby, you are sooooooooo lucky!!!

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[sr71blackbird]

I realise now I meantioned his hot girlfriend twice in the same thread..

sorry!

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[Bulldogcakes]

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If you start hearing dogs talking to you, we are all in trouble!!

I can say whatever I wan. . . .oh, sorry. He's means The Son of Sam. Nevermind.



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Ow! Hey! Get that net offa me! Ouch! Help!! Somebody HELP!!!!