Fart Comfortable

[ShelleBink]

How long before you are fart comfortable in a relationship?

[Yuppie_Scum]

For the man -- six weeks

For the girl -- 18 months.

It's a double standard ... live with it.

[jetdog]

As soon as my wife farted in front of me, I let em' fly!

So I guess about 2 hours sfter we met...

[Snacks]

for men: a couple of months


for women: NEVER!!!

[ShelleBink]

im afraid of exploding!

[Fallon]

I try not to.

http://a1485.g.akamai.net/7/1485/2597/0001/media.southparkstudios.com/media/images/308/308_splish_splash2.gif

[Justice4all]

I try not to.

http://a1485.g.akamai.net/7/1485/2597/0001/media.southparkstudios.com/media/images/308/308_splish_splash2.gif

yeas let's see how long THAT lasts for!

[foodcourtdruide]

My girlfriend and I fart in front of eachother all the time, and to be honest sometimes I wish we didn't. It's such a sign of not giving a crap anymore. One time she let out an extremely wet fart and I just looked at her and said, "I guess the romance is gone." We both laughed, but as Ronnie B. says, everything in life is a trade-off.

Anyway, to answer the original question. It was about 4 months before we were both comfortable. It started one night while I was driving and I had to go to the bathroom really bad. I have a weak stomach so it feels like I'm going to die if I don't let it out. She insisted I did it, and from there, there's been no turning back!

[ChrisTheCop]

I wont say it's never happened, but as a matter of respect for EVERYONE in my life, I try to keep bathroom stuff in the bathroom.
Other things I dont do that I hope my chick wouldnt do in front of me:
Burp the alphabet.
Throw up on my cat.
Clip toenails in the kitchen.

[Stankfoot]

wait a minute, women fart?

[A.J.]

I remember asking my first girlfriend (about 3 months into the relationship) "If I ever farted in front of you, you'd still love me right?" Immediately after she said "yes", I let loose with a spectacular blast. She laughed -- thankfully.

[cupcakelove]

I didn't think about this until now, but its been a year and I still don't know if I'm comfortable just letting one rip in front of her.

[Johnny Manf]

hmmmm i think it was a couple weeks of seeing each other everyday before i let one fly in front of her.
it took her a long time, and now i think she does it more than me. sometimes i laugh but sometimes i just wish she would hold them in and be more sexy-like. hahaha

[ScottFromGA]

As soon as my wife farted in front of me, I let em' fly!

So I guess about 2 hours sfter we met...

you beat me by 30 minutes!

on my wife's (g/f at the time) first date with me, we had just ate mexican and when she sat down in my truck, she floated one across the seat......looked at me, smiled and said, "This is MY seat now."




How can you not appreciate that?

[IamFogHat]

This is the first chick I've been with that I've been fart comfortable with, and she's like my 8th serious relationship.

[Bob Impact]

Sarah farted in front of me once. It was very girly and cute, and I found it disgusting.

[cupcakelove]

Sarah farted in front of me once. It was very girly and cute, and I found it disgusting.

The fart, or the the girly and cute part?

[Bob Impact]

The fart, or the the girly and cute part?

Farts are ugly and stupid.

[Marc with a c]

sarah would never fart in front of me

[Bob Impact]

sarah would never fart in front of me
That's because your creep her out and she wouldn't be around for very long.

[Marc with a c]

That's because your creep her out and she wouldn't be around for very long.

or is she right next to me now?

[Bob Impact]

or is she right next to me now?

No. She's not. Unless you've dressed up a bag of potatoes like a woman and wrote "Sarah" on it.

[King Hippos Bandaid]

wife none for 8 yrs before marriage

Now she uses it to gross me out.

:king:

[Marc with a c]

No. She's not. Unless you've dressed up a bag of potatoes like a woman and wrote "Sarah" on it.

i do have really good handwriting

[burrben]

wait a minute, women fart?

only in my mouth

[Furtherman]

I only heard a girl fart once in my lifetime. It was like seeing a unicorn!

It wouldn't bother me at all. Everybody farts.

[Snacks]

Sarah farted in front of me once. It was very girly and cute, and I found it disgusting.

I'm with you on that. I know its a double standard but men do disgusting things and no matter how cute a women can be or girly when she farts its just nasty. Women like to think of men as strong protectors and manly. Men like to think of women as cute, clean feminate and farting is very far from that.

[hyperspace]

usually after she breaks out the ball gag and cuffs.

[sailor]

never. it's called class.

[ChrisTheCop]

I wont say it's never happened, but as a matter of respect for EVERYONE in my life, I try to keep bathroom stuff in the bathroom.
Other things I dont do that I hope my chick wouldnt do in front of me:
Burp the alphabet.
Throw up on my cat.
Clip toenails in the kitchen.

I thought about this today at work. I dont even fart or burp (so one could notice) in front of my driver, and I'm his BOSS and could get away with it!

I agree with what Sailor just said, too; it's a matter of class. I dont care if it's Scarlett Johannsen, if she makes farting in front of me a habit, she's gone.

tee hee. I quoted myself!

[FUNKMAN]

almost 21 years of fartin in front of my now ex-wife. now I'm shy about it with someone new and don't have any plans to let loose

so now i would say 'never'

[ShelleBink]

almost 21 years of fartin in front of my now ex-wife. now I'm shy about it with someone new and don't have any plans to let loose

so now i would say 'never'

I missed something... :(

[ScottFromGA]

No. She's not. Unless you've dressed up a bag of potatoes like a woman and wrote "Sarah" on it.

theres others that do that?!?!?!

[grlNIN]

Never.

My boyfriend thinks it's HI-larious when i burp in front of him and i only do it because he laughs but the other would never occur.

[MasterSoySauce]

i cant ever, and i dont want her to either.

[TheMojoPin]

People who have sex together should never fart in front of each other (not even during the buttsechs. Clean up and empty out ahead of time, you monsters). Hell, I think a couple's pooping should be done as privately and as obscurely as possible. I broke up with a girl my senior year of high school because she clogged one of my toilets at my house and I pretty much could only picture her from then on taking this hideously sloppy and massive dump. Horrible.

[Snacks]

People who have sex together should never fart in front of each other (not even during the buttsechs. Clean up and empty out ahead of time, you monsters). Hell, I think a couple's pooping should be done as privately and as obscurely as possible. I broke up with a girl my senior year of high school because she clogged one of my toilets at my house and I pretty much could only picture her from then on taking this hideously sloppy and massive dump. Horrible.

That is my reason exactly. If my girlfriend ever shit and I smelt it or she farted and I smelt it I wold think of that everytime she was naked. Its a picture that would haunt a relationship.

[TheMojoPin]

That is my reason exactly. If my girlfriend ever shit and I smelt it or she farted and I smelt it I wold think of that everytime she was naked. Its a picture that would haunt a relationship.

Exactly. And I'm not being a dick and thinking I can just fart and stink up the house while she can't. Short of it being a dire emergency, I don't want to be that disgusting around other people.

[grlNIN]

What dire emergency would have you farting?


I would think, if anything, that would lead to an even bigger problem.

[ShelleBink]

I'll admit, I fart fairly often. My stomach is often a mess because of stress and such, and an adverse effect of my meds is that my stomach is often more topsy turvey. I'm weird, I find no reason to apologize for it.

[Friday]

Like Shelle, I am a rather gassy girl due to stress, meds, and other intestinal issues.
I take meds constantly to control it because I would be MORTIFIED to toot in front of anyone.
But admittedly, one escapes my guard now and then whilst i slumber. *so horrifying*

But I agree... if you can help it. I think the polite and respectful thing is to excuse yourself to the bathroom... and assume the launch position. Make sure you spray Nutraair! :)

[Bob Impact]

Like Shelle, I am a rather gassy girl due to stress, meds, and other intestinal issues.
I take meds constantly to control it because I would be MORTIFIED to toot in front of anyone.
But admittedly, one escapes my guard now and then whilst i slumber. *so horrifying*

But I agree... if you can help it. I think the polite and respectful thing is to excuse yourself to the bathroom... and assume the launch position. Make sure you spray Nutraair! :)

EEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

[Friday]

SHUT UP, BOB! *hrrmph*

[Bob Impact]

SHUT UP, BOB! *hrrmph*
I've got a new picture of Friday!














http://www.practical-jokes-and-pranks.com/images/noise_smell/6in_whoopie_cushion_250.jpg

[Fallon]

Like Shelle, I am a rather gassy girl due to stress, meds, and other intestinal issues.
I take meds constantly to control it because I would be MORTIFIED to toot in front of anyone.
But admittedly, one escapes my guard now and then whilst i slumber. *so horrifying*

But I agree... if you can help it. I think the polite and respectful thing is to excuse yourself to the bathroom... and assume the launch position. Make sure you spray Nutraair! :)

Just so you know, it won't bother me.

[Bob Impact]

Just so you know, I don't care.

That's love folks.

[SarahImpact]

I can't believe that a guy says that he wouldn't mind if his chick farts!!! That's great. Farting is human. When girls constantly fart I think its gross, but sometimes you just can't help it. Bob and I have been dating for a couple of years now and I've only slipped once and I'll never forget it. He was disgusted and I felt so gross, but I couldn't help it!! One time in years I don't think is bad at all!

[RoseBlood]

I remember the first time I passed gas in the company of my ex-bf. I didn't go in front of him but rather ON him. We were in bed sleeping and kinda intertwined so my butt was kind of up against or on his leg when all of a sudden *Poot*. It happened so fast and I'm sure I turned red cause I was all embarrassed. I didn't say anything and realized he was either sleeping and pretending he didn't hear or feel anything. It was so slight he never flinched.

[SarahImpact]

I have to say that there are much grosser things than farts!!!!! When your chick is pregnant what are you going to do when her tits start leaking and then she gives birth??? What are you gonna do then huh? I suggest getting used to farts to make other grosser things easier.

[drusilla]

it should never happen. luckily for me i have strange bowel issues that lead to almost zero activity in that whole area. i'll probably die at a fairly young age because of this. but as for my boyfriend, he is a farting machine, & ninny can agree with me that they are usually quite horrifying.

[Bob Impact]

Your sig's tounge kinda looks like it's making a fart noise.

[Poochie]

my guy was attempting to slip it in shortly after he woke up and I wasn't awake yet. i guess when he got up behind me i farted right on his cock. quite embarassing, and it was the first time i did it...even though i don't remember it.

[drusilla]

Your sig's tounge kinda looks like it's making a fart noise.

it's the old "bronx cheer"

[TheMojoPin]

What dire emergency would have you farting?

Fending off an attacker.

[grlNIN]

it should never happen. luckily for me i have strange bowel issues that lead to almost zero activity in that whole area. i'll probably die at a fairly young age because of this. but as for my boyfriend, he is a farting machine, & ninny can agree with me that they are usually quite horrifying.

His farts smell like they come from Narnia.

[ShelleBink]

I agree with Sarah on the whole pregnancy and kids thing. If you're freaked out about a little toot here and there, than what are you going to do when another human being shoots out of her happy region at 95 MPH

[sailor]

I agree with Sarah on the whole pregnancy and kids thing. If you're freaked out about a little toot here and there, than what are you going to do when another human being shoots out of her happy region at 95 MPH

i don't know aboot being freaked out by a little toot, but some people i know just don't care or even worse revel in it. "look at me, i just stank up the whole apartment! i win!!" yes, it happens to everyone, but if you can (and it's not some medical thing) try to act civilized. i don't think it's too much to ask for.

[sheepy's fart]

I don't see a big deal with it.

[Furtherman]

Bunch of prima donnas!

[LordJezo]

I went on a cruise with my girlfriend after dating her for about 4 months.

9 days on a boat in a tiny little room, pretty much anything goes, no where to hide.

But before that..

On our second date we went to the outlet malls in NY State. It was getting towards the end of the day and we were heading back to our car. All of a sudden I had a huge amount of liquid poo ready to come out, the urge came out of no where. I looked around for a bathroom but the closest one was a long walk away. At first I tried to be nice and say how I had to go use the toilet before we left for the drive back and walked with her to try to find one at the food court. As we walked it got worse and worse. Eventually I gave up, handed her all my stuff, and made a run for it. I had to make the walk of shame back. I just met this girl and already I was running off to make explosive poops.

[FUNKMAN]

a little stranger scenario:

my 14 year old daughter had a couple friends over. they're sitiing of the couch behind me as I'm on the computer and one of them just let's one rip, sounded like somebody starting a chainsaw. i'm rarely at a loss for words but it caught me off-guard. how does a grown man tell a 14 year old girl "hey good one" :-)

they thought it was the funniest thing and it just may be

[ShelleBink]

Yeh I'm guessing I'm realizing the fact that I'm really a product of my upbringing. I enjoyed grossing out my older brothers and dad when I'd fart and burp, and to this day I still get a twinge of joy grossing them out. With that being said, I am very aware of not doing this in public or certain company. I'm blessed to be with a guy who is incredibly classy, yet at the same time understands my awkward and strange bodily functions. The day he and I get in a burping contest will be a shining achievement for me.

[TheMojoPin]

I agree with Sarah on the whole pregnancy and kids thing. If you're freaked out about a little toot here and there, than what are you going to do when another human being shoots out of her happy region at 95 MPH

I'm gonna do like in the old timey movies, pacing back and forth in the waiting room, smoking furiously, and then handing out delicious seeeeeee-gars when the nurse comes out and tells me, "IT'S A BOY!"

[Snacks]

I agree with Sarah on the whole pregnancy and kids thing. If you're freaked out about a little toot here and there, than what are you going to do when another human being shoots out of her happy region at 95 MPH

I'm not going to do anything I will not be looking down there. I will either look her in the face and hold her hand or wait in the waiting room. Some people think seeing a baby born is just beautiful. Not me !!!!! If I see all that goo coming out and then a baby pop out and then more goo, I will never be able to have sex with her again.

[kevcala]

i don't know aboot being freaked out by a little toot, but some people i know just don't care or even worse revel in it. "look at me, i just stank up the whole apartment! i win!!" yes, it happens to everyone, but if you can (and it's not some medical thing) try to act civilized. i don't think it's too much to ask for.

Agreed.

Personally, I'm not a fan of when my guy friends fart in front of me. I never got into that out-fart your friends thing. Control your body, I don't feeling like sitting in a cloud of your waste.

[grlNIN]

I'm gonna do like in the old timey movies, pacing back and forth in the waiting room, smoking furiously, and then handing out delicious seeeeeee-gars when the nurse comes out and tells me, "IT'S A BOY!"


What happens when it's a girl?

And it's twins?

And they're Siamese?

[TheMojoPin]

What happens when it's a girl?

And it's twins?

And they're Siamese?

Kittens meet sack meet brick meet river.

[grlNIN]

Babies aren't kittens!

No Corgi for you, monster man.

[TheMojoPin]

Corgis are better than babies.

[grlNIN]

If a kitten can give birth to a puppy, so can i.

[TheMojoPin]

If a kitten can give birth to a puppy, so can i.

If you can, I will marry you and give you gold.

[sailor]

If you can, I will marry you and give you gold.

is gold a pet name for..you know...

[grlNIN]

a Corgi that he doesn't have?

[Tenbatsuzen]

Funny story.

(I'll wait for you to get your laughing caps on)

[Marc with a c]

http://www.fotosearch.com/comp/PHD/PHD591/200120451-001.jpg

[Tenbatsuzen]

They on? Good.

With the girl before Liz, We had been dating for 2 months, and I told her a lot of things about me that no one really knew.

Anyway, I was sleeping over her apartment, and her bedroom is adjacent to the only bathroom in the apartment.

And I had to go. I mean we're talking raisin bran, chili, and onions.

Since we had been only dating 8 weeks, I was truly scared of the sounds my colon would be capable of producing when my body decided to empty itself. Not only that, I was concerned about the smell. (This is before I realized that the sulfur from a lit match nullifies the smell quite effectively)

So my colon is ready to explode, and I literally clench-cheek walk down and out of her 10th floor apartment and go to the restaurant next door - that's right, use a PUBLIC RESTROOM - to get my business done.

[Tenbatsuzen]

I'd like to also apologize for the Chipotle in Rockville, Maryland for what I did in that stall. Sorry.

[sailor]

They on? Good.

With the girl before Liz, We had been dating for 2 months, and I told her a lot of things about me that no one really knew.

Anyway, I was sleeping over her apartment, and her bedroom is adjacent to the only bathroom in the apartment.

And I had to go. I mean we're talking raisin bran, chili, and onions.

Since we had been only dating 8 weeks, I was truly scared of the sounds my colon would be capable of producing when my body decided to empty itself. Not only that, I was concerned about the smell. (This is before I realized that the sulfur from a lit match nullifies the smell quite effectively)

So my colon is ready to explode, and I literally clench-cheek walk down and out of her 10th floor apartment and go to the restaurant next door - that's right, use a PUBLIC RESTROOM - to get my business done.

just run the tap. the white noise of running water is an effective silencer.

[TheMojoPin]

just run the tap. the white noise of running water is an effective silencer.

Or just run the shower. When you get out and she asks why you had the shower on, just mumble something about "hosing down the killing floor." Instant panty-dropper.

[Tenbatsuzen]

Said girlfriend was a virgin at the time. I was terrified of scaring her.

And considering the duration of that bowel movement, the water would have been running for a good 10-15 mins.

Shower wouldn't have worked because we had already showered earlier that night.

[sailor]

Said girlfriend was a virgin at the time. I was terrified of scaring her.

And considering the duration of that bowel movement, the water would have been running for a good 10-15 mins.

Shower wouldn't have worked because we had already showered earlier that night.

but if she was asleep the water wouldn't have disturbed her, just masked the other sounds.

[TheMojoPin]

Said girlfriend was a virgin at the time. I was terrified of scaring her.

Ah, yes. Sweet virgins, so unfamiliar with the ways of the flesh...like taking a dump. Soon, she shall be a woman and finally know the sweet release as her sacred female-waste splashes into a tidal pool under the full moon as a cirlce of Artemis worshippers dances around her.

[sailor]

Ah, yes. Sweet virgins, so unfamiliar with the ways of the flesh...like taking a dump. Soon, she shall be a woman and finally know the sweet release as her sacred female-waste splashes into a tidal pool under the full moon as a cirlce of Artemis worshippers dances around her.

http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/pic/TEL/3804~It-s-OK-to-Be-You-Posters.jpg

[Tenbatsuzen]

but if she was asleep the water wouldn't have disturbed her, just masked the other sounds.

Uh. Let's just say I'm getting married in a week and I don't need to go into further detail.

[sailor]

Uh. Let's just say I'm getting married in a week and I don't need to go into further detail.

roge-o

[A.J.]

I'd like to also apologize for the Chipotle in Rockville, Maryland for what I did in that stall. Sorry.

How dare you befoul ClassicRockville!

[Stankfoot]

I don't mind it when my wife farts but its gets annoying when she lights them.

[Bulldogcakes]

Depends on what you've been eating. Some farts can end a marriage.

[Bob Impact]

I don't mind it when my wife farts but its gets annoying when she lights them.

:lol:

[A.J.]

Depends on what you've been eating. Some farts can end a marriage.

My parents must be one of the lucky ones because my Dad is a prodigious flatuist.

[ShelleBink]

I thought of this thread while napping with my guy. My tummy rumbled ((no poots)) and every time he would stir a bit I'd go "That wasn't my tushie."

He isn't the one to care much about that. Plus his tummy grumbles a lot. And he's cute when he sleeps.






I'll shut up now.

[reillyluck]

Pharts = Phunny.


its great to rip one in the morning followed by a "i didnt do that giggle"

[CofyCrakCocaine]

I'd like to also apologize for the Chipotle in Rockville, Maryland for what I did in that stall. Sorry.

I don't like to shit where I eat!

[TheMojoPin]

Pharts = Phunny.


its great to rip one in the morning followed by a "i didnt do that giggle"

And then the "THE HELL YOU DIDN'T"-backhand.

[reillyluck]

And then the "THE HELL YOU DIDN'T"-backhand.

:lol:

[ShelleBink]

My best friend will get out of bed to fart on her husband... so it amuses me.

[Fallon]

My best friend will get out of bed to fart on her husband... so it amuses me.

By your best friend you mean you?
http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h281/WWFallon/ShelleonShelleAction.jpg

[ShelleBink]

By your best friend you mean you?
http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h281/WWFallon/ShelleonShelleAction.jpg

I'm not married.

[narc]

My policy is I try not to, but I'm not going to give myself stomach cramps if I don't. Luckily I'm not usually that bad, and even if I do have to, I'm really good at being discreet.
I had a girlfriend that did, and I really didn't care, as it didn't happen that much. I grew up with sisters with whom I'd get into occasional contests (and I'd always lose).
To even it up, she claimed I farted like a champ whilst asleep.
If you guys are this skittish, how do you feel about queefing? As a guy, I take it as a compliment.

[Leticia]

Me and myn bf started doing fart jokes very shortly after we started dating. He would cough to cover up the sound of the fart but cough too early on purpose,lol. So you'd hear him cough and then the loudest fart.

We still often apologize when we do it, especially if it really bad. We will be kind enough to tell eachother when the other person should leave the room,lol.

I'd say we are pretty fucking comfortable around each other :)

[torker]

This may be my favorite thread of all time.

[Stankfoot]

I taught my 10 year old son to blame the dog.
I am so proud!

[Bob Impact]

I taught my 10 year old son to blame the dog.
I am so proud!

A gassy dog explains your boardname.

[Marc with a c]

my girl farted in front in front of me once. i called doorknob on that bitch and she couldn't raise her left arm for a fucking month.

i play to win